I can't grow a full beard. The best I can hope for is a goatee and a crummy moustache. I have been shaving regularly for over a year now and I hear that makes it grow back thicker after a while (or something like that), but I can't stop shaving because work only allows "well-trimmed moustaches" in the realm of facial hair. And I'll be damned if I ever grow a 'stache without an accompanying goatee/beard.