Murphy's Law (Thread The Third!)

[Cracklord]

...I didn't mean them *Points at a group of elves who are bragging about their superiority and bullying other races for being inferior* I meant those guys, who a heavy majority of the elven race seems to belong to.
You-know-who among them.

But you know, exceptions to the rule and all that...*Grabs a torch and pitchfork* Hello, my name is karma, prepare to suffer.

I just be right over here, torching the elven military high command...
That show them.

Let's just say that i happen to agree with Matt on his dislike of elves, though while he dislikes them out of jealousy, i dislike them because of how arrogant and sure of their own superiority most of them are.
The whole part where they seem to think that anything they do to someone else is justified no matter what but if someone does the same thing to them it's a horrible crime that must be punished also helps.

Personally, when confronted with an elf, I just chuckle and think of this.
I'm not to keen on them myself, in fact I'm a proud member of the team dwarf, as I figure if we have to revere an elder race, it will be one that is of actual benefit, and stoicism appeals to me. I like your concept of differentiating dwarves from conventional ones. Personally, I always make my dwarves sound and look like a slightly compressed Barry White, unless it's a more hardline setting, in which they look and sound like a slightly compressed Sean Connery.
However, the elves are not your enemies, nor anyone elses. Sparkly vampires are. Search your feelings, you will know it to be true.

Now that the obligatory elves/dwarves problem is out of the way, let me move on to the primary one of Janine in #41. Whenever sex appears in a medium, I make an effort to deconstruct it until it becomes either hilarious or terrifying, so here we go.
People with no sense of humor, limited experience with the opposite sex or to young to be ready to read about certain themes, I suggest you look away from the following passage. Or, in fact, the internet in general, but that's not important right now.

#41: That She Lasted So Long Is A Miracle In Itself

Wow. And I was thinking that Radic yelling about Orcs in the third panel was gonna have a much bigger (and longer lasting) impact on Janine.

Then she realizes that elves are very...*cough* dexterous.

Now, our cleric has a persona of a very experienced woman, however I am forced to wonder whether she just talks a good game, and is actually fairly uncertain of how things happen when bumping ugliessmiting evil.
Why?
Well, because the attribute she chooses her partners for is dexterity. Or, if you prefer, flexibility (which I suppose I can understand) and speed.
That's right. Speed.
Constitution (stamina and endurance) would make far more sense, as most people like their encounters to take more then a few seconds, and many like them to go as long as possible, if you know what I mean. Moving fast enough to catch a bullet might impress somebody special, but I'm sure she'd prefer it later if when you get her alone you would take your time.
Charisma (charm, force of personality, and physical good looks) would make even more sense, though of course different people are attracted to different body shapes, and perceptions of beauty is as much (if not more) a product of culture as it is instinct.
Even strength would be a fair argument as it would at least ensure a good physical shape and ability, which would make things interesting in much the same way as flexibility offered by dexterity would without making them...brief.
Yet she chooses her partners for dexterity, in short quick, fast encounters. Indeed, elves have a constitution penalty, which makes this even worse. I mean, you may as well stop the she in the title for he, and you have a summation of their encounter.
Now we could assume she likes the toned, swimmer look, except her primary (though by no means exclusive) target of affections seems to be Lloyd, who is probably bulky if his armor, big weapon (and you know what they say about men with big weapons) and high constitution are anything to go by. So either she is open to many concepts of beauty, like dragons, or she doesn't really know what she is talking about, and her encounters tend towards the unsatisfying.
This could actually explain quite a bit, I mean in particular her lack of anything resembling tact or subtlety, in that she may actually have spent quite a bit of time cloistered with her urges suppressed forcibly and no human contact of that matter or experience with the other gender, and is compensating now that she is free to do as she will. Unfortunately this hypothetical interpretation has no solid understanding of sexuality due to lack of the subject being explained to her in a frank matter, and so she doesn't actually know what she is supposed to be looking for. In truth, her making herself available in this way is an act of rebellion rather then real desire, because she fears returning to the temple and becoming undesireale.
With any luck, the next comic will cover it in gratuitous detail.

Anyway, hope you get a chuckle out of that. I'll try some crack pairings later.