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Thread: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
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2009-08-13, 02:24 AM (ISO 8601)
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- Nov 2008
Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
Well, here we go again.
DurkonxLien. The beginning.
I deliberately wrote this in such a way that it puts Durkon in the spotlight in front of the other order. Because he deserves it.
Re-reading it it's not really Durkon centric, so I'll just write another one...
Spoiler
On New Years Eve, four hours from midnight, the three members of the Order still together made their way towards the edges of the celebration, Belkar not having bothered with his disguise despite threats of reprimands seeming particularly dejected.
"So I'm stuck drinking with fuzzy-wuzzy and the elf?"
"Truly it is an unknowable mystery why you are unable to attract any company or companions with such a sunny attitude and disposition."
Belkar shrugged disinterestedly at Vaarsuvius's reply, not really listening, then continued his rant. "I mean, everywhere is free. Everywhere. Even the classy places where they weigh your wallet before they let you in. And we're going to the pub. This is a whole new low."
"I surmise that because they are free, consumers of a more froward-thinking mindset had already set down their reservations. And since any one with any charisma has joined them we are left, as you succinctly put it, at the pub." Vaarsuvius replied, trying to needle Belkar.
"Well, you I can understand, and the dwarf, but I'm better than this. I know I am."
"Speak fer yeself, lad. Ah got ae date." Durkon replied plainly.
It seemed to take a moment for Belkar to process this. He blinked a few times, and his lips moved as though he was having trouble vocalizing his thoughts.
"Wha... Wh...how?" He chocked out at last, his eyebrow managing to rise where his hairline would be while his eyes narrowed and his head cocked, as rage, jealousy and deep confusion intermingled with disbelief. It seemed an almost impossible expression, and it's presence on Belkar's face endeared the dwarf to Vaarsuvius for all time.
"Well," Durkon said, with an air of casualness, "Neaten yerself oop a wee bit, be polite, an' re'pec'ful, an' per'aps grow ae beard."
Something like a quiet, drawn-out scream, escaped through Belkar's lips.
Durkon ignored him. "Thar tha lass be noo." He said happily, and walked past the halfling to the other side of the street. A tall, attractive women was leaning casually to the corner. She was very pretty, in a lean sort of way, and was wearing a dress just a bit to low cut to be casual, showing off her natural curves. Her short blue hair in an untidy mess, and she was fidgeting slightly, as though the clothes were slightly uncomfortable, and indeed they had the sheen of brand new clothes, never before worn.
She gave a wide, dazzling smile and waved as she saw the dwarf approach, and seemed to brighten up considerably. When he was close she bent down to kiss him, a quick, chaste kiss, if Vaarsuvius was any judge, but certainly a promising one. They started to walk off, and she laughed quietly but genuinely at something Durkon had said, her azure hair tussled slightly, their hands slipping together with an easy familiarity.
Belkar was still frozen, his expression deepening and a faint hiss escaping his lips.
Vaarsuvius was almost worried. "Are you well?"
Belkar snapped out of it with a growl. "No! I've just been ditched by the solid, dependable character who is nothing but boring, to go spend time with an A-class hottie totally out of his league! Leaving me with you!"
Vaarsuvius blinked, then shook head. "Actually... I was only coming to spend time with master Thundershield. You're not really my sort of company, I prefer intellectual types. I'll go back to the inn and trance." Vaarsuvius said to Belkar, turning on the right heel and walking away, muttering so low Belkar barely he heard, "maybe I should send to Kyrie."
Belkar stayed still for a long time. Finally he shook his head. "Gods I hate you all."
How was that? Funny I hope.Nadir We,
Youth Born,
Blood Letters,
Axe Weilders,
Victors Still.
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2009-08-13, 03:16 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Nov 2006
- Location
- England
Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
This post may contain sarcasm.
DeviantArt
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2009-08-13, 04:03 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Jul 2008
- Location
- Germany
- Gender
Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
Boy, this thread has flourished! And it has its own banners now! That's just great. :)
That last one was particularly awesome and so in-character, somehow! :D
The mods are afraid, very afraid, to enter this thread.
I have a suggestion for a not-so-crack pairing, like the last one was... Lien and O-Chul. They certainly seem to get on well, and she was soooo glad to see him, and now they're, um, riding a shark together. No, I'm not talking about a threesome... yet. XDLast edited by Kaytara; 2009-08-13 at 04:05 AM.
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2009-08-13, 04:35 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- May 2009
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Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
Formerly known as Discord here and Maladin on avatarspirit.net.
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2009-08-13, 04:39 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Nov 2006
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- England
Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
This post may contain sarcasm.
DeviantArt
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2009-08-13, 04:42 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Nov 2008
- Location
- Sweden
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Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
Also, it could be the fact that none of the material actually transgress the rules? Just a thought :)
Quoth the raven, "Polly wants a cracker."
Pony avatar by the Great and Powerful DirtyTabs. Lotsa hugs!
Scourge Caste avatar by the illustrious Akrim.elf. Thank you!
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2009-08-13, 04:43 AM (ISO 8601)
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- May 2009
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Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
Adding to that, considering the Houses of Fanservice are allowed... yeah.
Formerly known as Discord here and Maladin on avatarspirit.net.
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2009-08-13, 04:44 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Nov 2006
- Location
- England
Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
Maybe we're just masters of toeing the line.
This post may contain sarcasm.
DeviantArt
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2009-08-13, 04:57 AM (ISO 8601)
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- Aug 2008
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- Germany.
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2009-08-13, 05:28 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Jan 2007
- Location
- Beyond time and space.
Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
Oh, I've GOT to try this!
Try One: CrystalxThe orc chieftain (Love potion)
That one looks pretty funny, but I can't be arsed to write it.
Try Two: TherklaxDurkon w/Thor's might (Love potion)
Therkla/Durkon?! Plus, why am I getting so many twos?
Try Three: EoFaFxJulia GreenhiltxArgent (Pink frills and white lace)
...yeah, I'm not even going near that one.
Try Four: YorxTsukiko (Being very drunk/True Love)
Is there something wrong with me that I wanted Yor/Roy? Still, though, this one seems reasonable.
Try Five: Durokanxf!Durokan (American high school setting)
Someone write this one!
...Aww, no two-person yaoi.
Edit: Okay, I'm doing five more, and I'll try to get some yaoi this time!
T6: O-ChulxLien (French maid costume)
Sadly, it's reasonably sane. Still, though, I might try to write it... watch this space!
T7: Roy's swordxSarah Greenhilt (Pink frills and white lace)
See try number three...
T8: TsukikoxNalexHorace Greenhilt (Snowed in)
WHERE'S THE FRIGGIN YAOI?!
T9: CeliaxFlesh golem Roy (Snowed in)
Celia the necrophiliac! This should be fun!
T10: RedcloakxDurokan (One-sided love)
YAOI!!!
Okay, then, I'll post a dA link to a ZxV (ZZ'dtrixVaarsuvius) fic I'll do... this might end up as my OOTS OTP...Last edited by V Junior; 2009-08-13 at 05:52 AM.
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2009-08-13, 05:44 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Nov 2006
- Location
- England
Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
Last edited by Zanaril; 2009-08-13 at 05:45 AM.
This post may contain sarcasm.
DeviantArt
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2009-08-13, 05:54 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Jan 2007
- Location
- Beyond time and space.
Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
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2009-08-13, 06:14 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Nov 2006
- Location
- England
Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
Hey! Get your own pairing! (I suppose you can write it if you really want to, but it could potentially get confusing with two ongoing stories of the same couple.)
Why does everyone suddely like VxZ so much? Is it the cuteness? I wonder if we can elevate another pairing to those heights...Last edited by Zanaril; 2009-08-13 at 06:17 AM.
This post may contain sarcasm.
DeviantArt
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2009-08-13, 06:22 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Nov 2008
Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
I'm trying on Durkon and Lien, but I'm not a very cute person.
Oh, and guess what I just got...
Drizzt and Zz'Dtri!Nadir We,
Youth Born,
Blood Letters,
Axe Weilders,
Victors Still.
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2009-08-13, 06:26 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Nov 2008
- Location
- Sweden
- Gender
Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
Why does everyone suddely like VxZ so much? Is it the cuteness?Quoth the raven, "Polly wants a cracker."
Pony avatar by the Great and Powerful DirtyTabs. Lotsa hugs!
Scourge Caste avatar by the illustrious Akrim.elf. Thank you!
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2009-08-13, 06:26 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Nov 2006
- Location
- England
This post may contain sarcasm.
DeviantArt
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2009-08-13, 06:31 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Mar 2009
Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
It's been a bit, GitP. If you're reading this, you're either digging through old stuff, or I've posted for the first time in forever.
If you want to stay in touch, reach out to me on twitter (same username).
The best answer is always to ask your DM.
Unless you're the DM, in which case you should talk to your players.
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2009-08-13, 06:37 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Nov 2008
- Location
- Sweden
- Gender
Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
Problems have arisen.
I have an idea for a third chapter on the Overpriced Apple Girl/The Most Awesome Pickpockets In The ENTIRE WORLD! story, but there are some complications. While it could be written in a PG-13 mode, I really think it would come out better if it wasn't.
So, I had the idea of sending it out on Ninjamuffin's PM list (as can be found in the Fanservice threads). You think that's a good idea, or should I endeavor to make it postable?Quoth the raven, "Polly wants a cracker."
Pony avatar by the Great and Powerful DirtyTabs. Lotsa hugs!
Scourge Caste avatar by the illustrious Akrim.elf. Thank you!
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2009-08-13, 06:41 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Nov 2008
Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
If you do that, it may lead to this site getting a PM of it's own, and lots of people doing this.
It starts with pickpockets. It ends with verbal pornography between animals and inanimate objects. Can you live with that?
But I think we should start our own one, rather then get a whole lot of people who aren't interested.
I'll start it on my sig.Last edited by Cracklord; 2009-08-13 at 06:52 AM.
Nadir We,
Youth Born,
Blood Letters,
Axe Weilders,
Victors Still.
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2009-08-13, 06:50 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Nov 2006
- Location
- England
Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
Last edited by Zanaril; 2009-08-13 at 06:51 AM.
This post may contain sarcasm.
DeviantArt
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2009-08-13, 06:51 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Nov 2008
Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
Back when there was no plot, just a contrived circumstance and people acting out of character.
Good times.Nadir We,
Youth Born,
Blood Letters,
Axe Weilders,
Victors Still.
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2009-08-13, 07:12 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Nov 2006
- Location
- England
Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
I didn't intend for my ZxV stories to have a plot either, it just developed by itself as I tried to figure out ways of having Z and V meeting and ending up in bed without getting repetative.
Not that plot is a bad thing. I like (w)angst as much as I like smut, and the former kinda requires some story.Last edited by Zanaril; 2009-08-13 at 07:22 AM.
This post may contain sarcasm.
DeviantArt
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2009-08-13, 07:26 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Mar 2009
Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
Last edited by The Dark Fiddler; 2009-08-13 at 07:28 AM.
It's been a bit, GitP. If you're reading this, you're either digging through old stuff, or I've posted for the first time in forever.
If you want to stay in touch, reach out to me on twitter (same username).
The best answer is always to ask your DM.
Unless you're the DM, in which case you should talk to your players.
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2009-08-13, 07:30 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Aug 2009
Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
Ok, I rolled out Tsuiko and Belkar. One of them very drunken. I'm going to think a little bit about this, because it seems familiar in a certain way. We had Belkar very drunken and we had a situation between these two Characters in the comic. Probably I'll use this.
I apologise to you for misspelling, using words incorrectly and breaking the rules of grammar. Please forgive me, English is not my native tongue.
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2009-08-13, 07:39 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- May 2009
- Gender
Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
Belkar really liked Tsukiko's short skirt.
Since Belkar doesn't need to be drunk to hit on her, I'd presume it's Tsukiko who's smashed.
Of course, it's creepier if you consider Tsukiko a teenager.Formerly known as Discord here and Maladin on avatarspirit.net.
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2009-08-13, 07:43 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Jun 2008
- Location
- Nexus
- Gender
Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
Right. Let's see what I get.
Initial table and pathetic table, for starters.
17 for the initial table, meaning Kazumi
16 for the pathetic, meaning... Argent.
And the plot device!
American... high school setting?
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2009-08-13, 07:55 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Nov 2006
- Location
- England
Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
This post may contain sarcasm.
DeviantArt
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2009-08-13, 08:01 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Mar 2009
Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
It's been a bit, GitP. If you're reading this, you're either digging through old stuff, or I've posted for the first time in forever.
If you want to stay in touch, reach out to me on twitter (same username).
The best answer is always to ask your DM.
Unless you're the DM, in which case you should talk to your players.
-
2009-08-13, 08:04 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Nov 2006
- Location
- England
Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
Last edited by Zanaril; 2009-08-13 at 08:04 AM.
This post may contain sarcasm.
DeviantArt
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2009-08-13, 08:05 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Dec 2008
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- Lexington, VA
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Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table