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  1. - Top - End - #271
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Rob Roy's Avatar

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    852: In any play by post game I must use proper capitalization.
    853: I can not start a program to breed kender and tinker gnomes, ever again.
    854: When the Illuminati is destroyed, using their time machine for fun and profit, or to replace The Conspiracy is frowned upon.
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    Alright. I have officially found a reason to run around, screaming "The end is near here!", with only a loincloth and a crudely painted sign as my possessions.
    Mind=asplode from the awesome of that image.
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  2. - Top - End - #272
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    Tychris1's Avatar

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    856: Summon a succubus and attempt to rape it.
    857: I am not allowed to us dragon breath (fire keyword) as a form of jetpack
    858: I am never allowed to go to a market with any spells prepared. EVER.
    Last edited by Tychris1; 2011-01-24 at 12:32 AM.
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  3. - Top - End - #273
    Halfling in the Playground
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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    859: Contrary to rules as written a Druid/Shadowdancer in Dire Bear form is not allowed to HIPS in the shadow of a pencil he just threw into the ground...

    860: Throwing a bag of holding into a rope trick is NOT the magical equivilant of dividing by 0

    861: +1 Vorpal dentures are not a valid magic item for a elderly halfling

    862: Turning a preist with true faith into a lawn chair does not make him a really cool vampiric torture device
    Last edited by BrainFreeze; 2011-01-24 at 05:34 AM.
    Quote Originally Posted by sikyon View Post
    C'tan fight wars simply because they want more candy.

  4. - Top - End - #274
    Ettin in the Playground
     
    Cieyrin's Avatar

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    863: Not allowed to start a halfling breeding cult in pursuit of the Fullling.
    Rule of Cool Contributor and Goon

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    Quote Originally Posted by Mulletmanalive View Post
    Damn you Cieyrin! Cieyrin!!!!!read as Khaaaaan!

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  5. - Top - End - #275
    Orc in the Playground
     
    Gideon Falcon's Avatar

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    864: My Bard can not inspire anything with Perform: Mime. Not even competence on move silently checks.

    865: My Bard cannot inspire anything with Perform: Interpretive Dance

    866: The same applies to Perform: One Man Band

    867: And Perform: Pun

    868: ESPECIALLY not Perform: Pun

  6. - Top - End - #276
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    Coplantor's Avatar

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    869: No adventure time references.

    870: I already got away with playing a transformer in a medieval fantasy setting so o laser eyes for me
    I WAS THERE
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lord Fullbladder, Master of Goblins View Post
    Sane.... isn't the word I'd use with you, Coplantor. Or myself, in fact. With myself, I'd say obssessive. With you, I'd say.... Coplantor.


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  7. - Top - End - #277
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    Creed's Avatar

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    871: Own a gun in a middle ages setting, no matter how primitive.
    872: Own a vorpal weapon
    873: Own a crossbow ("CRUCIFY HIM ON MY WEAPON!!!")
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    Creed, you guys are awesome.
    Quote Originally Posted by Tychris1 View Post
    Now for Creed to quote me and say something snarky. And the circle of life will be complete.


    "Chill! Chill! CHILL!"

  8. - Top - End - #278
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Prince Zahn's Avatar

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    874: being a Halfling with an unnaturally large hair on my head(or unnaturally large anything, for that matter), does not increase my size catagory.
    875: I may attack any female adventurers with a swarm(or any) flying size-medium Zombie Spellstitched(CA), owl's wisdom-ed Toads.
    875a:Male adventurers are fine.
    @I took 875, the number that ended your post is 1 higher(875 mine, 876, 877 and 878 879 880 and 881 are yours) the number the next poster starts on is 882.
    Last edited by Prince Zahn; 2011-02-01 at 02:54 PM.
    P.Z. - gamer; friend; royalty. 'Tis a pleasure.

    "I could embrace you forever, I Fight for you with blazing passion and a knife I stole from you —I dare not ask what you plot with it.
    Follow me, and I will protect you, we can laugh together and it will be over soon.
    Just trust me, one of us has to."
    —Vamber, The daring Martyr.

    Ceika made my Vamber avatar - Thanks!!


    Quote Originally Posted by Arcanist View Post
    I trust you mister DM! I just don't trust your NPC's!

  9. - Top - End - #279
    Orc in the Playground
     
    Gideon Falcon's Avatar

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    875: Nor may I inspire anything with Perform: Kazoo.

    876: I may not have ranks in Perform: Kazoo, Mime, Interpretive dance, or Pun.

    877: I may not use an Alphorn as a bardic instrument, even if the rules specifically allow it.

    878: If I break #877, I may not practice said Alphorn within 100 feet of my party.

    879: I may not practice my Alphorn anywhere while everyone is trying to sleep.

    880: I may not practice a musical instrument while everyone is trying to sleep.
    Last edited by Gideon Falcon; 2011-02-01 at 02:51 PM.

  10. - Top - End - #280
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    ZaradAnNasr's Avatar

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    881: I may not play an evil character who "has scryed" the Evil Overlord list.
    once, we accepted that everything was the way it was, and that was enough for us. now, we question our own existance. clearly, we are approaching a problem. what if, in our quest to determine whether we are real, we find that we are not?

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  11. - Top - End - #281
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Wookieetank's Avatar

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    882: As a DM I may not have the BBEG scry the Evil Overlord list.
    Last edited by Wookieetank; 2011-02-03 at 09:23 AM.

  12. - Top - End - #282
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Prince Zahn's Avatar

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    883 884(Real number I'm on): Detect plot Hook, enchant DM, and Dismiss storyline(as well as lesser/greater Dismiss Storyline) are not Legit spells for any spellcaster, and I may not cast any of them as a result.
    884a: nor do they make legit class or monster features/abilities.

    885: In any Scenario that My character makes a most-likely Lethal mistake, I may not say my character does any of the following:
    - "Hold A+B+start+Select".
    - "Hold L1+R1+L2+R2+Select+Pause".
    - "Press the Reset button".
    - "Summon an unltimate being of any kind by calling his name(I.e Chuck Norris,Cthulhu O-chul, the GM) to unmake my mistake."


    886: The pizza(and the delivery commoner bringing it) that our hungry barbarian ordered back in town at the day of the invasion may not arrive "BBEG's Castle of Crisis" during the epic final battle.
    886a: even if our player's and characters are starving.
    886b: if it does arrive, but after 30 minutes or more after ordering, you still have to pay full price and a 20% tip.
    Last edited by Prince Zahn; 2011-02-04 at 09:29 AM.
    P.Z. - gamer; friend; royalty. 'Tis a pleasure.

    "I could embrace you forever, I Fight for you with blazing passion and a knife I stole from you —I dare not ask what you plot with it.
    Follow me, and I will protect you, we can laugh together and it will be over soon.
    Just trust me, one of us has to."
    —Vamber, The daring Martyr.

    Ceika made my Vamber avatar - Thanks!!


    Quote Originally Posted by Arcanist View Post
    I trust you mister DM! I just don't trust your NPC's!

  13. - Top - End - #283
    Ettin in the Playground
     
    Cieyrin's Avatar

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    887. I don't have Resist Plot as a skill.
    888. I don't have Internal Monologue as a language.
    889. Making wishes in Modron doesn't make them any less likely to be twisted, even if everything in Modron is perfectly clear and never implied.
    890. When the DM gives me irritated looks, that doesn't mean use more metamagic.
    Rule of Cool Contributor and Goon

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    Quote Originally Posted by Mulletmanalive View Post
    Damn you Cieyrin! Cieyrin!!!!!read as Khaaaaan!

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  14. - Top - End - #284
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Drynwyn's Avatar

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    891-I will not write any battle plan longer than 5 pages.
    892-If I make a battle plan, I may not write it while using Sun Tzu's Art of War (I actually did this... the plan worked- until the DM got out his replica sword.)
    Lich avatar by SmuchMuch

  15. - Top - End - #285
    Ettin in the Playground
     
    Lord Raziere's Avatar

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    893: not allowed to exploit the Henchmen and Command backgrounds at character creation to achieve an army of 100,000 troops starting out...
    Monkey Playwright of the Improbability Drive Fan Club, Regardless, orcs should be people.

    Raziere Watches: One Piece Weariless In Water 7: Part 6, UP!



  16. - Top - End - #286
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    IronWilliam's Avatar

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    I thought you weren't allowed to read this anymore....
    894 My Druid cannot be the walrus. (Yay Beatles!)
    -Paladin in the Playground

  17. - Top - End - #287
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    NecromancerGuy

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    895: When my DM tells me to stop killing things its not a suggestion.
    896: When my DM sets up and anti magic field its not because he wants me to leave.
    897: I may not rename a farming town into "The killing Fields" for a single bad joke
    898: If I am told to save a town from mind flayers I may not help the mind flayers turn the town into a corral for enslaved human cattle.
    899: Fire does not solve everything.
    900: I may not use dominate person on anyone's friends or family
    901: In order to preemptively stop the above I may no longer play a Neutral Evil Wizard at high levels.

  18. - Top - End - #288
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    BarbarianGuy

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    902 When playing a druid i am not suppose to shape change into a squirrel and drop flame strikes from the tree's.

    903 I am not suppose to cut off my houses head and wear it as a helmet.

  19. - Top - End - #289
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    SolithKnightGuy

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    904) I am not allowed to play an orc with an Intelligence of 1 just for the comic possibilities.

    905) I am no longer allowed to bring in ONE MORE GODDAMN GELATINOUS CUBE. (But they're so fun... )

    906) I am not allowed to make my party think they're going to fight a white dragon when it's actually an albino red dragon.
    The below statement is true.
    The above statement is false.
    Figure that one out.

  20. - Top - End - #290
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Cleavon's Avatar

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    907): I am not allowed, EVER, to play in an evil aligned campaign as a cleric of a god involving rogues or roguishness, and employ the Leadership feat to acquire a Fighter type with the feat that allows Coupe De Grace as a standard action.

    908): I am not allowed, EVER, to cast hold person on an important humanoid enemy, and have said cohort slay him in one shot with his quickened Coup De Grace.


  21. - Top - End - #291
    Troll in the Playground
     
    mangosta71's Avatar

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    909) I cannot play a 7-foot tall halfling.
    910) A didgeridoo will not fit in my pack. No, not even a bag of holding.
    911) I can never again play any character or NPC of my own alignment.
    912) Rohypnol is not an appropriate substitute for Diplomacy.
    Delightfully abrasive in more ways than one
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    Quote Originally Posted by RabbitHoleLost View Post
    Mango:you sick, twisted bastard <3
    Quote Originally Posted by Gryffon View Post
    I think Krade is protesting the use of the word mad in in the phrase mad scientist as it promotes ambiguity. Are they angry? Are they crazy? Some of both? Not to mention, it also often connotates some degree of evilness. In the future we should be more careful to use proper classification.

    Mango is a dastardly irate unhinged scientist, for realz.

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  22. - Top - End - #292
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    ZaradAnNasr's Avatar

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    913: I can never make a Gestalt Monk/Sorcerer
    914: I can not have a character hand delivering Delayed Blast Fireballs.
    once, we accepted that everything was the way it was, and that was enough for us. now, we question our own existance. clearly, we are approaching a problem. what if, in our quest to determine whether we are real, we find that we are not?

    Avatar courtesy of Rae Artemi (thank You)




  23. - Top - End - #293
    Ettin in the Playground
     
    Lord Raziere's Avatar

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    915: Invent the dirigible then kill two of my party members with it.
    Monkey Playwright of the Improbability Drive Fan Club, Regardless, orcs should be people.

    Raziere Watches: One Piece Weariless In Water 7: Part 6, UP!



  24. - Top - End - #294
    Titan in the Playground
     
    Jade Dragon's Avatar

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    916. If I play a ninja with max ranks in heal, I am mot allowed to call him Dr. Mcninja.

    917. If I play an Italian man with max ranks in jump who was a plumber before an adventurer, I am not allowed to have him wear red clothes, a red cap, and suspenders.

    918. I'm not allowed to have said plumber's younger brother wear green clothes, a green cap, and suspenders.

    919. I am no longer allowed to play CN blaster sorcerers, especially if they get bored easily.

    920. If playing said sorcerer, I am no longer allowed to cast amnesia on the party paladin.

    921. If our DM hands us a list of items we have from a treasure chest, I am not allowed to take out a shotgun and say "it's from the list".

    922. As above, but with a chainsaw.

    923. As above, but with a lightsaber.

    924. As above, But with dynamite.
    Last edited by Jade Dragon; 2011-03-06 at 03:32 PM.

  25. - Top - End - #295
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    Azuyomi244's Avatar

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    925. I am not allowed to have my characters father be a weapon-smith.
    926. I am not allowed to put a bucket on the person giving the quest.

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  26. - Top - End - #296
    Titan in the Playground
     
    Jade Dragon's Avatar

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    927. I am not allowed to name my dinosaur companion Yoshi.

  27. - Top - End - #297
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Lemonus's Avatar

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    928a. My good fighter may not wear green clothes, be named Link, and come from Hyrule.

    928b. He also cannot have ranks in Peform (Ocarina)

    929. Nor may my evil wizard be named Ganondorf, and he can't multiclass into druid to wildshape into a giant boar/pig.
    Last edited by Lemonus; 2011-03-06 at 04:54 PM.
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  28. - Top - End - #298
    Titan in the Playground
     
    Jade Dragon's Avatar

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    930. When DMing, the princess may not be an elf named Zelda (hyrulians have pointy ears).
    Last edited by Jade Dragon; 2011-03-06 at 05:01 PM.

  29. - Top - End - #299
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    Geno9999's Avatar

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    Quote Originally Posted by Swiftmongoose View Post
    930. When DMing, the princess may not be an elf named Zelda (hyrulians have pointy ears).
    931: I cannot have a Elf Ranger named Link
    932: Nor can I have a black Warlock/Fighter named Ganondorf.
    933: I can't make any Zelda references at all.
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  30. - Top - End - #300
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    KoboldRevenge's Avatar

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    934. I can't believe it's not Butter! hahaha!
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