Community Based Monster Classes VI

[Lix Lorn]

I mainly like Canada because of the xkcd strip.

So how about dem monster classes?

[ScionoftheVoid]

• Don't make the creature name blue.

• Default creature class layout has it, I'll get to fixing it eventually.
  
  

• Class Skills: The Gargoyle
  ’s class skills (and the key ability for each skill) are Disguise (Cha), Hide (Dex), Listen (Wis), Spot (Wis).
  
  • There's an accidental line break there, between Gargoyle and 's.

[The Antigamer]

Canada, eh.

Re: Remhoraz, or however you spell it, I love how it is getting all this feedback on abilities that the Purple Worm had first (and which were never commented on).

Purple worm was approved before I had time to review it

[Gorgondantess]

I read it and reread it, and only saw one minor paragraph format that could be tidied up. One of the reasons we ask for critiques is because, after a considerable amount of time spent working on a monster, we're intimate enough with the entry that we'll overlook stuff. Can you be clearer?

Hmmm... must've been my mind playing tricks on me. No, that one thing was the only one I can see... but I could've sworn there was more...

I'll give it some consideration. The thought crossed my mind, I just wasn't sure what angle to take - my inclination was just to say "It'll affect an iron golem too, just refluff."

Maybe just say that it has to actually deal damage to get the effects? That would be a... passable fix.

That's intentional. Note the 'further'. Each spike will subtract 2 con, but half of that gets mended when you yank out the offending spike, the other persists as ability score damage.

...Huh. That's interesting. And pretty damn powerful. I mean, yikes con damage!

I discussed that in the comments. I agree it may be a touch over the top, but it's ultimately a monster with little else going for it than the petrifying gaze. Pit it against an enemy that's immune and it's just got a substandard natural attack.

That's what we have ability score mods. Just give it +5 to strength and you should be good.
Also, the natural attack is pretty damn powerful, especially with strength bonuses.

That would normally point to getting some fair Str & Con bonuses, for a creature with no fine manipulation or speech, but the hazard with con bonuses is that it's a creature with a con based special ability. If I give it 6 con over 5 levels, that's a +3 to all the DCs.

...And that's why you give it str bonuses instead.
+2 con is perfectly sufficient, anyways.

I'll tweak it, though. BAB changed, strength bonuses increased in number. May lower HD size and give it more natural armor.

That would be reasonable... though in retrospect, I'd say the HD size is fine. You're going for a slow and indomitable creature, but don't want to give it too much con, so high HD size works for that.

True, but my thought was that you're affecting just the single target and you're targeting a consistently high save, which tones it down a bit.

Slow also has a single target, and targets a semi-high save.

Damn! And I really liked the gameplay dynamics & flavor of it. Now I'm gonna have to find another approach to the ability.

Don't scrap it! I liked it too. Just tweak it. Streamline!

Reworded it from "These obstacles do provide cover, but only to creatures within 30' of it." to "These obstacles can provide cover, but only for creatures within 30' of it." Changed the range to be dependent on Strength bonus rather than HD.

It's still pretty lame. I mean, grease is significantly more powerful than either of those effects. Either make them more powerful, or lose the standard+ action.

Dunno what kind of passive bonus I'd grant in that department. Don't know it's entirely fitting as a subspecies, either.

Abyssal greater basilisk? Right next to the basilisk? A core monster?
Anyways, it's just an advanced basilisk with the fiendish template. Just give it a few resistances and that should be good. Maybe throw in DR/magic, too.

Well, keep in mind that you're only dropping one effect a round, as a standard action. It's not that different from the manticore's spikes, in that respect.

...Are you? It looked to me like you're dropping all three at once.

I'm gonna sit back & brainstorm a new approach to the stone/petrifying eye abilities, though. I don't want to go the medusa route, because it's just so "doing the same thing every combat", and I want some flexibility in there. I'll see what I can come up with.

No, I like what you did. It's cool, just neither balanced nor practical. Work on that.

Remhoraz, or however you spell it, I love how it is getting all this feedback on abilities that the Purple Worm had first (and which were never commented on).

I commented on all the Purple Worm's abilities. What does it have that the Remorhaz copied?

[Warpwolf16]

Can I request something? Totem Giants?

This is a thread I'll be lurking in >w>

[Gorgondantess]

Can I request something? Totem Giants?

This is a thread I'll be lurking in >w>

Are those an official monster? If so, what book?

[Hyudra]

Maybe just say that it has to actually deal damage to get the effects? That would be a... passable fix.

Works.

That's what we have ability score mods. Just give it +5 to strength and you should be good.

Also, the natural attack is pretty damn powerful, especially with strength bonuses.

Oh? I dunno, I find myself comparing to a greatsword wielder with full BAB, and finding it falls short, especially after the greatsword wielder has iterative attacks and enhancement bonuses.

Slow also has a single target, and targets a semi-high save.

Slow

Transmutation
Level: Brd 3, Sor/Wiz 3
Components: V, S, M
Casting Time: 1 standard action
Range: Close (25 ft. + 5 ft./2 levels)
Targets: One creature/level, no two of which can be more than 30 ft. apart
Duration: 1 round/level
Saving Throw: Will negates
Spell Resistance: Yes

It's still pretty lame. I mean, grease is significantly more powerful than either of those effects. Either make them more powerful, or lose the standard+ action.

It's worth emphasizing that you're a class that imposes slow and movement hampering effects leading up to petrifaction. A patch of difficult terrain will prevent a charge and keep enemies at bay long enough for you to lay down the petrifaction effects.

Abyssal greater basilisk? Right next to the basilisk? A core monster?

I always viewed that more as showing off a template (like the Legendary Minotaur) rather than saying "Hey, this is a common thing related to Basilisks".

...Are you? It looked to me like you're dropping all three at once.

Ah, now I see your issue with the degree of rolling/effects.

No, laying down, say, Craggy Look, would be an action independent of any of the other Stone Eye abilities. So you could pile on Sedimentary Seeing or whatever I called it, and that would impose a fatigue condition (Using it first because you know it to be a typically weaker save). Then you could, next turn, use Heavy Glare to add the slow. So long as the two conditions overlapped, the target would be petrified.

I commented on all the Purple Worm's abilities. What does it have that the Remorhaz copied?

Actually, IIRC, when you commented on the Purple Worm, I made a point of the fact that you hadn't commented on Sinuous or Flexible. IIRC, Flexible has been cribbed & used on the Remorhaz, and now it's getting a lot of attention.

[bladesmith]

I did kinda crib the bit about a non-speaking remorhaz, too. Though that hasn't got as many comments. Though Flexible really hasn't caught all that much flak, either.

Whoah there, maybe scale back the strength bonus a bit?

Do you really think it needs it? I was shooting for the sort of Strength bonuses that would make it pretty easy to take the Awesome Blow feat, but if you think so, I can slow down the Strength progression.

Maybe some re-wording here. I think you mean "As a swift action, a Remorhaz can activate his heat aura, which lasts for a number of rounds equal to 5+Con modifier. Anything touching the Remorhaz takes 2d6 points of fire damage. Creatures striking a Remorhaz with natural attacks or unarmed attacks are subject to this damage, but creatures striking with melee weapons do not take damage from the remorhaz’s heat. The damage increases by 1d6 every two levels, becoming 3d6 at 4th level, 4d6 at 6th level, etc. The Remorhaz can use this abilty 1/day/3HD(minimum 1), and is fatigued for a number of rounds equal to the rounds spent using Heat."

I'm not sure I agree with the Remorhaz being fatigued for so long after using Heat. Also, you need to note what action it takes to end Heat.

Done. Because that just sounds a lot better. As for the fatigue, I was just thinking about Rage while I wrote that. Still kinda iffy about it, but I took it out for now. And added a bit about it being a free action to end Heat.

Not so sure about this ability...

I'm changing it up. See below.

I like the idea, but when would it want to occupy irregular shaped spaces?

I imagine it would mostly be a tactical decision. When you need to fill a wider hallway to keep the bad guys from getting past you. Giving more people flanking bonuses. Stuff like that. It fit the flavor, and gave the Remorhaz something to do after they charge in and alpha strike.

I'd give burrow 10' at 5th level, and burrow 20' at 7th level, but that's just me.

Sounds good. Gets the progression in while you are still in the class. On the other hand, I kinda like the slower progression... Eh, I think I'll keep it as is for now, but keep this in mind.

Say until the beginning of its next turn to be clearer about when it ends. Also, I'd make the extended reach depend upon HD somehow, and the penalty to AC dependent on how far it extends the reach.

Fixed, hopefully. Rather then making the reach depend on AC, I used size as the requisite modifier. It seemed to make more sense to me. I'm a little worried about growth spells and what not, but I don't think that will be to significant of a factor. I will come back and look at the wording later, though. I'm pretty sure I can do that better.

Is this in addition to, or in place of, moving the 5' backwards?

In addition to. Fixed.

Note that they take Heat damage even if the Remorhaz isn't currently using the Heat ability.

Good catch. Mix-up from back when Heat was on all the time.

I like this, it seems fun, but the range increment needs to be scaled down a bit, and it needs a recharge time.

Thanks! I was kinda proud of this one. I cut down the range, and made the magma usage a fixed range, rather then incremented. Because I didn't want to have to figure whether it was a thrown weapon or launched weapon, and how many increments it could travel. As for the recharge time, what do you think? Instinct tells me one minute, but I'd like to hear your thoughts.

For the Remorhaz, I'd make Ambush work, rather than as an ill-defined Fort save (what kind of bonus would "stable" creatures get?) you make it work as part of a bull rush maneuver.

That... Is altogether to smart. I changed that. Although I noted that it doesn't work with Rush because that seemed a little cheesy to me.

[Makiru]

Are those an official monster? If so, what book?

Magic of Incarnum. After the debacle with the soulspark and its non-OGL-ness, though, it might not be worth the effort, at least not at this moment with so many other creatures left to work on.

[bladesmith]

Quick Basilisk review, because basilisk's rock. Pun completely intended.

1) This class screams "Tank". You could probably bump up the nat. armor by 1 or 2 if you wanted. Otherwise, the basics look pretty good. If you could think of a way for the basilisk to speak, though, that would be cool. There are a lot of other monsters here that don't speak in their natural forms, but manage in the monster class.
2) I'll admit, that at first glance then Slow affect does seem a bit overpowered, compared to the others, but I don't think it matters all that much in the long run. You may want to note whether or not Sedimentary Sight stacks with itself(does 2 uses= exhausted?) for us idiots. Oh, and pretty sure its already been said, but some text saying that you can only use one at a time would be nice. On the other hand, I like that you can actually petrify things with multiple uses, and the Dex damage will slow down a lot of the faster creatures that Basilisks would have trouble with.
3) Eight Clawed is awesome. Basilisks just roll over everything.
4) I think its been said before, but you may want to change it to simply ignoring hardness. Or perhaps hardness less then 20. Or something.
5) Slow metabolism is pretty cool. Makes sure that you aren't going to be easily stopped by some silly failed fort save any time soon.
6) Geomorphic Gaze... Really doesn't do much. Perhaps if you the area affected was bigger, it would be worth the time, but... I dunno. Making it a move action might be a good idea. Spare a glance for the scenery before turning deadly eyes on your foe. As a side note, another affect could do something like caltrops. Making blades of grass into sharpened stone spikes would be pretty wicked.
7) Deliberate Advance keeps the basilisk rolling. I like.
8) Subspecies are neat, give extra options, and seem balanced. There's not much more to say.
9) Torpid nature comes nice and early enough to deal with those things that really annoy a good tank: will saves. Getting to stay up an extra round before Sleep, not getting Confused for an extra round... An excellent addition to the monster that doesn't stop.
10) I like the abilities in Petrifying Gaze. The only one that doesn't make much sense to me is Lithic Stare. Its like a Slow effect, except you pick which type of action that they can't take. So I guess it kinda makes sense... Handy for making sure the bad guy doesn't get away, or the big guy doesn't kill your mage... Okay. I can understand that. Carry on. Also, copypasta error with Crushing Glower, unless you want it to switch to Dexterity damage later. Also, does your full power gaze attack affect allies, too? Or just enemies?

This class is the M1 Abrams of monsters. Slow and a little ponderous, but it just keeps crawling over everything, laying down devastating ranged attacks until the enemy slows enough for the basilisk to crunch them beneath its eight clawed feet. You did a pretty good job of working your way up to the petrifying gaze, and there is plenty of flavor ideas here for me. I approve.

[AugustNights]

Back from travels. Lost a bunch of suggestions last night. Should have some up by tomorrow.

Edit: Lycanthropy curse thing: Probably not the place for it. Therianthropy is looking more and more out of the direct scope of the project, if the council wouldn't mind, and when I get enough free time, I intend to open a Therianthropic sister thread akin to the Homebrew Sister thread. Of course, that could take some serious time as that I am devoting more of my time to a revision of weapons and the half-golem revamp.

[mootoall]

I know there's a stigma about it, but you might want to give the Remorhaz Imp. Bull Rush as a bonus feat, since it seems like that's a big part of its game. And regarding the Basilisk- Reading Bladesmith's review, I think that it might not be a good idea to reduce its BAB and give it a trample attack. Removes the problem of little actual damage dealing for a tank, and gives it more options/incentives to knock someone prone.

[ScionoftheVoid]

Changes have been made to the Gargoyle. They're small (in general), but there are a fair few, including removing the blue from "Gargoyle" and standardising the Con boosts (of which there are now two, in case you hadn't guessed).

[Hazzardevil]

Being a big fan of this series of threads I have a question.
What is that little guy in the picture for the iron golem?
It has made me wonder for a while and I don't have a clue what it is.

[mootoall]

It's a flesh golem, and it's eight feet high.

[Kobold-Bard]

Being a big fan of this series of threads I have a question.
What is that little guy in the picture for the iron golem?
It has made me wonder for a while and I don't have a clue what it is.

Flesh Golem.

[Gorgondantess]

Being a big fan of this series of threads I have a question.
What is that little guy in the picture for the iron golem?
It has made me wonder for a while and I don't have a clue what it is.

I'd answer, but I'm deathly afraid of ninjas swordsages, apparently.

I know there's a stigma about it, but you might want to give the Remorhaz Imp. Bull Rush as a bonus feat, since it seems like that's a big part of its game.

Or, better yet, give it an ability that allows it to do something that's actually cool. Like, I donno, a slam attack that'll push them back a number of feet equal to the damage it did/2. Or something like that.

And regarding the Basilisk- Reading Bladesmith's review, I think that it might not be a good idea to reduce its BAB and give it a trample attack. Removes the problem of little actual damage dealing for a tank, and gives it more options/incentives to knock someone prone.

I agree. Also, it doesn't fit the fluff.

[mootoall]

I'd answer, but I'm deathly afraid of ninjas.

Please sir, we're swordsages. And FIVE SHADOW CREEPING ICE ENERVATION STRIKE!

[Hazzardevil]

I lolled about the whole pickiness of what you are.
Why do they call ninjas swordsages of this forum?

[The Antigamer]

I lolled about the whole pickiness of what you are.
Why do they call ninjas swordsages of this forum?

Because swordsages are more powerful than ninjas.

[mootoall]

I lolled about the whole pickiness of what you are. Why do they call ninjas swordsages of this forum?

Mostly because of the ToB love we seem to share. Oh, and regarding my post about the basilisk- I actually meant it might not be a bad idea. I mean, it's going for the "unstoppable tank of rolling doom" feel to me, and with the "Eight Clawed" ability it looks like it should be able to ... y'know ... do something with them.

[Hyudra]

Oh, and regarding my post about the basilisk- I actually meant it might not be a bad idea. I mean, it's going for the "unstoppable tank of rolling doom" feel to me, and with the "Eight Clawed" ability it looks like it should be able to ... y'know ... do something with them.

The Basilisk is more artillery than steamroller. There's more fitting creatures for trample.

Also, I wrote up a reply to Bladesmith last night, but apparently it didn't go through. Damn.

To paraphrase: Thank you very much for the positive review, Bladesmith. I'm glad I got the 'slow and steady' and the 'sorta-tanky' feel across. No, sedimentary sight doesn't stack with itself (I'm 90% sure I explicitly stated that in the description).

As far as the caltrop idea, I really like it, but I find it hard to justify in, say, a dungeon with stone floors & a little dust. I can maybe buy the basilisk kicking up a plume of dust with its tail and turning dust to stone, fusing it to itself and making for unreliable and crumbling ground (kind of like walking through snow that's crusted over on top). Turning the same terrain into caltrops would be harder to sell, I think. Which leaves the option of having that incongruency or having the basilisk be terrain dependent, which is ick. I hate class features that are situational; turn undead (in ravenloft vs. a campaign with no undead), favored enemy, black dragon monster class's benefits in water, etc.). Don't want to go that route, however well the ability might fit.

Chumplump: If you want to move the Lycanthropy material over, that would work well.

[Saidoro]

No one else has anything to say about the cloaker?

[The Antigamer]

No one else has anything to say about the cloaker?

I'll review it for you later, but try to refrain from asking for reviews, it makes Gorgondantess eat kittens
Like it says in the opening post, reviewing others monsters makes them want to review yours.


Quick question Hyudra, why is Wendigo on the unfinished list? I thought it was approved in the last thread?

[Hyudra]

Quick question Hyudra, why is Wendigo on the unfinished list? I thought it was approved in the last thread?

I copied over the unfinished list from the previous thread. Still need to sit down with Gorgon & perhaps some of the other veteran monster class makers, work out which should be added to the list, which were confirmed as being in good enough shape to warrant addition.

[Saidoro]

Half Elemental Template (Manual of the Planes p.189)

Class

Spoiler

Show

Prerequisites:
Special: Heritage tracing to the appropriate elemental plane.
It's half elemental, not part elemental. Also, consider a ritual option as half-fiend or half-celestial.

HD: d8
{table]Level|BAB|Fort|Ref|Will|Feature
1|+ 0|+0*|+0*|+0*| Elemental Body, Elemental Power, Ability Increases
2|+ 1|+0*|+0*|+0*| Elemental Magic [/table]

Class Skills: (4 + Int. Mod.) x4 at first level. The Half Elemental’s class skills are Balance, Climb, Concentration, Knowledge (Nature), Knowledge (the Planes), and Survival.

In addition to these, Half Elemental may add additional skills to there their class skills list depending on their type.

Air: a half Air Elemental adds Jump and Tumble to its list of class skills.

Earth: a half Earth Elemental adds Appraise and Balance to its list of class skills.

Fire: a half Fire Elemental adds Bluff and Intimidate to its list of class skills

Water: a half Water Elemental adds Escape Artist and Swim to its list of class skills.

Class Features
Proficiencies: the half elemental is proficient with simple and martial weapons, as will well as light armor; but not shields.

Elemental Body: Unlike other monster classes, the creature's original racial traits are retained. The Half Elemental’s type is changed to outsider, and he gains all traits and abilities associated with the type. You need to specify native outsider. All half elementals receive +4 racial to fortitude saves made to resist poison. All half elemental also receive a bonus it its armor class in the form of a natural armor bonus equal to its constitution modifier.

In addition, each Half Elemental receives additional bonuses depending on its type.

Air: Half Air Elementals have the [Air] subtype and are immune to electricity damage and damage taken as a result of falling. In addition to this, at 6 HD, the air elemental gains the ability to fly as a speed of 60ft. with average maneuverability.

Earth: Half Earth Elementals have the [Earth] subtype and are immune to acid damage. In addition, half earth elementals have a burrow speed of 10ft. This speed increases by 10 additional feet for every 2 HD the elemental gains after the first two. At high levels this becomes far faster than any of the others. Consider capping it at base land speed.

Fire: Half Fire Elementals have the [Fire] subtype and are immune to fire damage. In addition, at 4 HD, and for every 4 HD thereafter, the half fire elemental's base land speed increases by 10ft.

Water: Half Water Elementals have the [Water] subtype and are immune to cold damage. Half Water Elementals have swim speeds equal to their base land speed and can breathe underwater as well as on land. In addition, Half Water Elementals receive a +8 racial bonus to swim checks and may always take 10 on swim check, even if rushed or threatened.

Lastly, Each Half Elemental has improved base saving throw scores depending on its type.

Air: The reflex save progression granted by the Half Elemental Monster Class increases to good.

Earth: The fortitude save progression granted by the Half Elemental Monster Class increases to good.

Fire: The will save progression granted by the Half Elemental Monster Class increases to good.

Water: The reflex save progression granted by the Half Elemental Monster Class increases to good.

Elemental Power (Su): Half Elementals have great powers granted by their elemental heritages. Each half elemental receives a one of the following abilities depending on its type.

Air: Force of Nature (Su): Blows made by the Half Air Elemental carry the awesome force of raging winds. Whenever the air elemental deals damage with a melee attack to a target no more than one size category larger than the Half Air Elemental must make a successful balance check (DC = 10 = Damage dealt) or be moved back 5ft. Movement forced in this way does not provoke an attack of opportunity. Building on what Hyudra said, perhaps make it not kick in until the end of a full attack and then have it throw them a distance based on how many time you hit.

Earth: Stability (Ex): Half Earth Elementals are as stable and immovable as the earth itself. All half earth elementals receive a bonus to rolls made to resist Bullrush and being knocked prone equal to 5 + ½ their HD. Consider making them better at bullrushing, not just at resisting bullrushes.

Fire: Burn (Su): The body of the half fire elemental radiate incredible heat. Creatures struck by a melee attack from a half fire elemental take an additional amount of fire damage equal to the half fire elemental’s charisma modifier. This sort of thing usually hurts enemies attacking with natural weapons as well.

Water: Flowing Form (Ex): Half-Water Elementals can make their body fluid and amorphous, allowing them to squeeze through tight spaces. Half-Water Elementals receive a bonus to escape artist checks equal to 5 + 1/2 their HD. This bonus doubles for checks made to squeeze through a tight area.

Ability Increases: Each half elemental gains a bonus to its ability scores depending on its type.

Air: Half Air Elementals receive a permanent increase of +1 to their dexterity score at each level.

Earth: Half Earth Elementals receive a permanent increase of +1 to their strength score at each level.

Fire: Half Fire Elementals receive a permanent increase of +1 to their charisma score at each level. Fire Elves, Fire Hobgoblins and Fire Genasi all have charisma penalties and intelligence bonuses.

Water: Half Water Elementals receive a permanent increase of +1 to their constitution score at each level.

Elemental Magic (Sp): Each Half Elemental possesses powerful magic, allowing it control the forces of its elemental. The half elemental gains a set of spell-like abilities granted as it increases in HD. These spell like abilities vary depending on its element. The save DC for these abilities are 10 + 1/2 the Half Elemental's HD + the Half Elemental's Charisma modifier.

Plane Shift is a boring capstone ability, clerics could do that for the last ten levels and wizards for the last 6. Consider Gate(travel version only). Or maybe Shapechange into appropriately subtyped creatures only.

HALF AIR ELEMENTAL
{table=head]HD |Spell-like Ability|Uses Per Day

1|

Obscuring Mist

|

1/day/2 HD (minimum 1)

3|

Wind Wall

|

1/day/2 HD

5|

Gaseous Form

|

1/day/4 HD

7|

Air Walk

|

1/day/4 HD

9|

Control Winds

|

1/day/5 HD

11|

Chain Lightning

|

1/day/6 HD

13|

Control Weather

|

1/day/6 HD

15|

Whirlwind

|

1/day/6 HD

17|

Elemental Swarm*

|

1/day/10 HD

19|

Plane Shift

|

1/day/10 HD

[/table]
*Cast as Air spell only.

HALF EARTH ELEMENTAL
{table=head]HD |Spell-like Ability|Uses Per Day

1|

Magic Stone

|

1/day/2 HD (minimum 1)

3|

Soften Stone and Earth

|

1/day/2 HD

5|

Stone Shape

|

1/day/4 HD

7|

Spike Stones

|

1/day/4 HD

9|

Wall of Stone

|

1/day/5 HD

11|

Stoneskin

|

1/day/6 HD

13|

Earthquake

|

1/day/6 HD

15|

Iron Body

|

1/day/6 HD

17|

Elemental Swarm*

|

1/day/10 HD

19|

Plane Shift

|

1/day/10 HD

[/table]
*Cast as Earth spell only.

HALF FIRE ELEMENTAL
{table=head]HD |Spell-like Ability|Uses Per Day

1|

Burning Hands

|

1/day/2 HD (minimum 1)

3|

Produce Flames

|

1/day/2 HD

5|

Flaming Sphere

|

1/day/4 HD

7|

Wall of Fire

|

1/day/4 HD

9|

Fire Shield

|

1/day/5 HD

11|

Fire Seeds

|

1/day/6 HD

13|

Firestorm

|

1/day/6 HD

15|

Incendiary Cloud

|

1/day/6 HD

17|

Elemental Swarm*

|

1/day/10 HD

19|

Plane Shift

|

1/day/10 HD

[/table]
*Cast as Fire spell only.

HALF WATER ELEMENTAL
{table=head]HD |Spell-like Ability|Uses Per Day

1|

Obscuring Mist

|

1/day/2 HD (minimum 1)

3|

Fog Cloud

|

1/day/2 HD

5|

Water Breathing

|

1/day/4 HD

7|

Control Water

|

1/day/4 HD

9|

Ice Storm

|

1/day/5 HD

11|

Cone of Cold

|

1/day/6 HD

13|

Acid Fog

|

1/day/6 HD

15|

Horrid Wilting

|

1/day/6 HD

17|

Elemental Swarm*

|

1/day/10 HD

19|

Plane Shift

|

1/day/10 HD

[/table]
*Cast as Water spell only.

Comments in blue

[Hyudra]

Saidoro's comments are on target. Also spotted:

"All half elemental also receive a bonus it its armor class in the form of a natural armor bonus equal to its constitution modifier."

You want 'all half elementals', 'to their' armor class and a natural armor bonus equal to 'their' constitution modifier.

[The Antigamer]

Cloaker

Spoiler

Show

Hit Dice: d8

{table=head]Level|Base Attack Bonus|Fort Save|Ref Save|Will Save|Class Features

1st|

+0

|

+0

|

+0

|

+2

|Cloaker Body, Engulf, Engulfing Leap, +1 Str

2nd|

+1

|

+0

|

+0

|

+3

|Shadow Shift, +1 Con

3rd|

+2

|

+1

|

+1

|

+3

|Improved Engulf, +1 Str

4th|

+3

|

+1

|

+1

|

+4

|Flight, +1 Con

5th|

+3

|

+1

|

+1

|

+4

|Moan, Growth, +1 Str [/table]

Skills Points at 1rst Level: (2+Intelligence Modifier) x 4
Skills Points at Each Level: (2+Intelligence Modifier)
Class Skills: The Cloaker’s class skills (and the key ability for each skill) are Bluff (Cha), Concentration (Con), Disguise (Cha), Hide (Dex), Listen (Wis), Move Silently (Dex), Spot (Wis)

Proficiencies: The Cloaker is proficient only with its natural weapons.

Cloaker Class Features: The following are the Class Features of the cloaker.

Cloaker Body: The Cloaker loses all other racial traits and acquires aberration traits, giving it darkvision 60 ft. Cloakers begin as medium creatures with base land speed of 10 ft, a bite attack that deals 1d3+str damage and a tail slap that deals 1d4+str damage. Either the tail slap or the bite can be the Cloaker's primary weapon at a given point in time, but both can't be the primary weapon at the same time. Cloakers get a natural armor bonus equal to their constitution modifier.
Make one or the other primary is what I would do. Save headaches. Also, a 5' or 10' climb speed would not be amiss, I believe, to tide it over til flight.

Cloakers are virtually indistinguishable from a normal black cloak, they gain a +10 on disguise checks to appear as a normal cloak, and may choose to count as only half their weight for the purposes of calculating encumbrance f worn.
Typo

Engulf: A cloaker can try to wrap a creature at least one size category smaller than it in its body as a standard action. The cloaker attempts a grapple that does not provoke an attack of opportunity. If it wins the grapple check, it establishes a hold and bites the engulfed victim with a +4 bonus on its attack roll. It can still use its whiplike tail to strike at other targets.

Attacks that hit an engulfing cloaker deal half their damage to the monster and half to the trapped victim.
Seems good, nothing to see here.

Engulfing Leap: As a full round action a cloaker can fly up to 40' at a target and attempt to engulf them. Feats or abilities that enhance a charge attack can also enhance this action.
At 3 HD this ability can be used to fly up to 60'.
At 6 HD it can be used to fly up to twice the cloaker's fastest movement speed or 80', whichever is greater.
Not sure about the scaling leap thing. Also, why is jump not a class skill?

Shadow Shift: Beginning at 2nd level the cloaker can manipulate shadows. While in shadowy areas the cloaker can use the following abilities:

• Silent Image: The cloaker can use Silent image as a spell-like ability once per day per HD. Save DC 10 + 1/2HD+cha mod. At 5 HD this becomes at will.
• Obscure Vision: A cloaker may use a swift action to gain concealment for 1d4 rounds once per day per 2 HD. At 10 HD this becomes at will.
• Dancing Images: At 4 HD the cloaker can use mirror image as a spell-like ability once per day per 3 HD. At 12 HD this becomes at will.

At 8 HD these abilities can be used regardless of lighting conditions.
It can't use dancing images until third level, correct? I'd note that, just to avoid confusion. Also, I'm against such a low HD for uses regardless of shadows

Improved Engulf: At third level the Cloaker becomes better at containing its foes. Engulf can now be used on creatures of the cloaker's size or smaller. Also, the cloaker's bite can now be used to make iterative attacks against any foe the cloaker is grappling while it is a primary weapon.
Couldn't it already?

Flight: Starting at fourth level the cloaker can fly at a speed of 40' with average maneuverability.

Moan: From fifth level cloakers gain the ability to emit a dangerous subsonic moan as a standard action. The cloaker can use these abilities a total number of times per day equal to its HD.
Combined, or each?

Cloakers are immune to these sonic, mind affecting attacks. Unless otherwise specified, a creature that successfully saves against one of these effects cannot be affected by the same moan from the same cloaker for 24 hours. All save DCs are 10+1/2HD+cha mod. The cloaker can cause four different effects:

• Unnerve: Anyone within a 60-foot spread automatically takes a -2 penalty on attack and damage rolls. Those forced to hear the moan for more than 6 consecutive rounds must succeed on a Will save or enter a trance, unable to attack or defend themselves until the moaning stops.
• Fear: Anyone within a 30-foot spread must succeed on a Will save or become panicked for 2 rounds.
• Nausea: Anyone in a 30-foot cone must succeed on a Fortitude save or be overcome by nausea and weakness.
  Affected characters fall prone and become nauseated for 1d4+1 rounds.
• Stupor: A single creature within 30 feet of the cloaker must succeed on a Fortitude save or be affected as though by a hold monster spell for 5 rounds. Even after a successful save, the creature must repeat the save if the cloaker uses this effect again.

Growth: A fifth level cloaker grows to large size. Its reach, grapple modifiers, natural attack damage and skills change accordingly, but it doesn't gain any ability score bonuses or penalties.


Comments/Changelog:

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Comments
A classic monster with 5 levels and 4 major abilities, not terribly difficult. Still, it's my first homebrew, so there's probably something wrong with it.

Areas of concern:

• Do engulfing leap and the ability to be carried give it enough maneuverability until it starts flying? should I up it's move speed?
  Maybe. Like I said, a small climb speed might be nice, so it can hang on walls/ceilings.
• Should the shadow shift abilities be at will right from the beginning? Should they never be at will? Is my current scheme the right idea but given at the wrong levels?
  I think your current setup works except for the ability to use them without shadows at 8th level.
• The nausea and stupor moans seem like they shouldn't be gained until a few HD later, but I have no idea when.
  I'm not sure if that's completely necessary. You can fiddle with it though.
• The cloaker has a lot of abilities keyed to Charisma, should I be giving boosts to that instead of/in addition to boosts to con and dex?

You have boosts to con and strength. A cha boost at 3HD and 5HD might work, if nothing else is changed

Comments in red.
Like you said, not much innovation going on, but a solid rendition of a monster for a first attempt

One thing I might suggest; I've always been a fan of villains wearing cloakers. Maybe a synergy ability with a host in addition to growth at 5th level? Or a feat or ACF?

[Saidoro]

Make one or the other primary is what I would do. Save headaches

You're the second person to say this so you probably have a point, ah well.

Also, a 5' or 10' climb speed would not be amiss, I believe, to tide it over til flight.

That would play well with their general ambushyness.

Seems good, nothing to see here.

Huzzah.

Not sure about the scaling leap thing. Also, why is jump not a class skill?

Scaling leap is to keep it relevant after you get the 40ft fly speed, I could cut it down to just a single increase at 4HD, would that be better? Because I didn't think of that.

It can't use dancing images until third level, correct? I'd note that, just to avoid confusion. Also, I'm against such a low HD for uses regardless of shadows

Correct. Okay.

Couldn't it already?

Before it could only engulf things smaller than it and/or natural weapons can't normally make iterative attacks.

Combined, or each?

Combined.

Maybe. Like I said, a small climb speed might be nice, so it can hang on walls/ceilings.

And coat racks, can't forget coat racks.

I think your current setup works except for the ability to use them without shadows at 8th level.

Okay.

I'm not sure if that's completely necessary. You can fiddle with it though.

They seemed powerful at the time, but I've since compared them to stinking cloud and suggestion. Disregard that line.

You have boosts to con and strength. A cha boost at 3HD and 5HD might work, if nothing else is changed

Okay.

I'll implement these changes. Thanks for the review.

[AugustNights]

Flesh golem

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While she’s a relatively solid melee tank build, she’s also relatively vanilla.
There isn’t much new brought to the table by playing a Flesh-golem, and it seems like you’ve left a lot of potential floating about. Remember this guy isn’t an ordinary flesh-golem, it’s an adventurer! Think of the potential presented by a amalgamation of corpses animated by electricity…
Can it do more than heal with electricity damage, such as gain strength, speed, or backlash attacks?
Can it make a shocking attack?
Can it unstitch its limbs and animate them?
Can it hide cookies in its lower lumbar cavity?
Can it hide one of its eyes in a jar of jellied eels in order to spy on the local pub?
Can it ghoulify an ogre’s corpse to gain it’s strength?
What a medusa’s face to gain a petrification eye?
Can it sew more limbs to it’self?
Can it sew a sweet blue cape?
Can it tap into its muscle memory to play the flute or other woodwind instrument?
What about other skills?
Can it hunt down doctors and strangle their relatives?
Can it demand a bride?
Can it create its own bride?
Can it do the farm work for a small family and be accepted by the blind old guy only to be run off by the young buck husband?
Can it stitch leather to itself? (I don’t know why, but I’d do that.)
Can it graft weapons to its partially metal frame?
Can it exchange purposely ambiguous body parts with Gene Wilder?
Can it trick people into thinking its name is the same as the person who created it?
Can it be created by a 14 year old girl who feared that science shouldn’t try and push it’s luck?
Can it hold a swarm within its belly?
Can it distract the boogey man with a removed sexy leg, while its hands untie Santa Claus?

A good place to look for some great inspiration is Lappy 9000’s Soul-stitched, and their racial feats.

Quasi God

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Love the idea. Kobold Bard never stop homebrewing. Ever.
~Love the point-buy system, works out really well.
~1st nitpick, pronouns change a lot, sometimes in mid-sentence, between ‘you’ and ‘they’
~3rd level has Divine Companion on the table, rather than Manifestation of Divinity.
~5th level abilities are listed as 6th level abilities in description.
~As that Undead and Constructs would be Extraplanar anywhere besides the prime material plane it would not be at all game-breaking to give them the native subtype of the plane they’re ‘home’ at and give them the extraplanar subtype everywhere else. (The subtype does very little besides, as far as I can tell, differentiate between spells and effects that target them, and those are super situational. I think)
~Ability score bonus, the unnamed one, can it be multiple abilities or is it meant to only be one… for example
At levels 1, 3 & 5 gain +1 strength
Or
At level 1 gain +1 strength
At level 3 gain +1 charisma
At level 5 gain +1 sandwich-eating-score-that-the-DM-houserules.
~ Divine Companion: I’m personally not keen on the +1 HD or change option at each level, particularly due to the implied entry text that seems to suggest that the animal companion is similar to that of a Druid’s class feature of same name of effective Druid Level equal to ECL (or HD in this system) of the Quasi-god, and because I further would infer that this implies the bonus HD, Tricks, and other goodies of being an animal companion.
~Aura of Divinity: Cool, reminds me of the marshal and I loved that class… still trying to retool it but I digress.
~Divine Travel: Plane shift uses per day and wording is a bit funny I don’t quite understand when the power is allowed to the Quasi-god, or if it works off of Greater teleport, the issue may come from an unclosed ()s.
~Personal Plane: Hell yes. I’d say since it’s personal, and stuff can’t transfer you could also allow the QD to be in charge of magical effects (dead magic, wild magic, ect) and gravity (subjective, objective, sideways, centric, ect). However time is best left out of the QD’s control. Time is super easy to abuse. Also, the reading of the home-plane makes for it to be a great way to kill things that rely on food, water, or air, as that they don’t receive the benefits of anything taken while inside the home plane… a cruel DM might say the air doesn’t take, a less cruel DM might still mess with the water/thirst or food/hunger effects of such a rule.
~ Hamper the Competition: Fun!
~ Divine Dealings: So in Sandman, the endless can call on eachother and talk, right? I kinda see the ability to call on any deity and chat as a cool power… what I’m trying to say is it might be cool if it could ‘contact other plane’ for deities of other alignments to talk, but the deity on the other side is not compelled to tell the truth or even answer.
~Closing Clause of Immortality is confusing. Does the QD get all of these abilities it qualifies for, or just one that it both chooses and qualifies for?
Overall awesome… My players will know about this class. Great options, and as I tend to say, there could always be more!

Basalisk

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Love the pic, somewhat creepy, and hauntingly remorseful almost. Speaks to me as a Player Character Class all the way… Also makes me wonder about combining a chameleon and a basilisk for my next batch of saps… I mean players.
~Stone Eye: Craggy look seems more powerful that the other two to me, and would probably serve better as a standard part of the look, with the other two as singe choice options… of course not necessary, but I imagine most players will use it like that anyhow. Option is made at each use, yes?
~Geomorphic Gaze is, like all of the other abilities, very cool, and interesting, but I feel it could present more options… also its lead in text made me excited for the ability to petrify undead or constructs of organic materials... maybe it’s better off that it cannot… but its something a player would look at and say ‘Hey! If it can petrify dirt…”
Otherwise it looks like a very fun and interesting class, how you manage to turn 1 trick ponies into beasts of many options I’m not certain, but keep it up!

Right… so that was considerably less reviews in an amount of time than I thought I would be able to do… if you want me to look over your beast, and make my humble suggestions, PM me, otherwise I’ll probably pick through them slowly by interest.