Tarquin's Ambiguity....

**belias360** · 2011-12-28, 09:49 PM (ISO 8601)

I'm a little confused about Tarquin's last comment about the dwarf in this comic:

http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0742.html

I'm sure that the whole "bathing an ape" thing was an unusual euphemism for sex, right? So when he was talking about the male dwarf and the "spelunking" involved, this scene makes Tarquin come off as ambiguously bi. Unless I misread this? Could someone clarify?

**Gift Jeraff** · 2011-12-28, 09:52 PM (ISO 8601)

Tarquin thinks "secret dwarf ally" refers to his penis. Nothing bisexual about it.

**Mutant Sheep** · 2011-12-28, 09:53 PM (ISO 8601)

Originally Posted by belias360

I'm a little confused about Tarquin's last comment about the dwarf in this comic:

http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0742.html

I'm sure that the whole "bathing an ape" thing was an unusual euphemism for sex, right? So when he was talking about the male dwarf and the "spelunking" involved, this scene makes Tarquin come off as ambiguously bi. Unless I misread this? Could someone clarify?

With dwarves... whats the difference!

I wouldn't put Tarquin past just doing whatever whenever whatever whenever whatever. because grammar conventions are obsolete and outdated and cause unneeded strife between dwarves and apes.

**NerfTW** · 2011-12-28, 10:54 PM (ISO 8601)

The dwarf is his penis. He is saying his penis is not a dwarf.
Spelunking is the act of exploring a cave. It's being used as a euphemism for sex.

And that is all we can say on that subject without getting too graphic.

**Kish** · 2011-12-29, 12:26 AM (ISO 8601)

Elan claimed he wasn't there earlier because he and Haley needed to give their orangutan a bath. It was a terrible excuse, which he used to cover up that he had been having a meeting with his and Haley's secret dwarf ally, Durkon. Luckily, Tarquin assumed what Elan was covering up was that he and Haley had been having sex.

So, later, Tarquin chuckles that he can still "bathe an ape" himself. Tarquin was referring to his (never-realized) plans to have sex with Amun-Zora. However, since Elan had meant to cover that he was having a meeting with his secret dwarf ally, he concluded Tarquin must have a secret dwarf ally he was having a meeting with. It's a matter of Tarquin considering the phrase "bathe an ape" to mean "have sex," and Elan considering it to mean "have a meeting with one's secret dwarf ally."

**VanBuren** · 2011-12-29, 06:18 AM (ISO 8601)

Originally Posted by Kish

Elan claimed he wasn't there earlier because he and Haley needed to give their orangutan a bath. It was a terrible excuse, which he used to cover up that he had been having a meeting with his and Haley's secret dwarf ally, Durkon. Luckily, Tarquin assumed what Elan was covering up was that he and Haley had been having sex.

So, later, Tarquin chuckles that he can still "bathe an ape" himself. Tarquin was referring to his (never-realized) plans to have sex with Amun-Zora. However, since Elan had meant to cover that he was having a meeting with his secret dwarf ally, he concluded Tarquin must have a secret dwarf ally he was having a meeting with. It's a matter of Tarquin considering the phrase "bathe an ape" to mean "have sex," and Elan considering it to mean "have a meeting with one's secret dwarf ally."

Of course, Tarquin responded with "I wouldn't call him a dwarf", further confusing the issue by taking Elan's comment to refer to the size of his +5 Keen Greatsword.

**belias360** · 2011-12-29, 07:32 AM (ISO 8601)

Oh....that's REALLY confusing, but it makes more sense now. Thanks everyone. Kinda wish he was though, it would help his "Affably Evil" image a bit more in my opinion.

**Palthera** · 2011-12-29, 08:18 AM (ISO 8601)

Someone evil becomes more affable just by being bi-sexual? That's a bizarre way of looking at things...

**Amarsir** · 2011-12-29, 10:50 AM (ISO 8601)

Depends on how you pronounce "affable".

**NerfTW** · 2011-12-29, 04:09 PM (ISO 8601)

Originally Posted by belias360

Oh....that's REALLY confusing, but it makes more sense now. Thanks everyone. Kinda wish he was though, it would help his "Affably Evil" image a bit more in my opinion.

Um, what?

**Ashadar** · 2011-12-29, 04:32 PM (ISO 8601)

So.. no one is going to ask about the "wash behind the ears" remark of Tarquin?

**Lord Tyger** · 2011-12-30, 01:41 PM (ISO 8601)

Well, we know that when he thought Roy wanted him (or pretended to think Roy wanted him) his reponse wasn't "No thanks, I don't swing that way," but "I'm soon to be married."

Which could have just been the primary objection in his mind (IE, "Even if I were bi, the fact that I'm soon to be married is more important), although given that he hasn't convinced his fiance yet...

On the other hand, he never mentions any ex-husbands.

*yes, this is now the discuss Tarquin's sexuality thread*

**ORione** · 2011-12-30, 02:22 PM (ISO 8601)

Originally Posted by Lord Tyger

*yes, this is now the discuss Tarquin's sexuality thread*

I knew this forum was missing something.

**littlekKID** · 2012-01-01, 10:22 AM (ISO 8601)

I knew this forum was missing something.

I love you, guys

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