Look over there!! *runs for it*

[Ranting Fool]

Rather than risk threadomancy I thought I'd start a new post and ask Giants in the Playground their fave use of the Bluff skill (Only counting actual bluffs that were allowed in game rather than the abstract examples used to prove/disprove how broken it could be) and what unexpected effects did it have?

Quick set up: PC's hear that a Bard NPC is selling 6 potions that "grant spell like abilities", they know that he stole one from a wizard friend of theirs and believe the other 5 to be fake. The Bard was holding an open air auction at the docks and the turn out is 500+ with at least one Sorcerer lord (LE rulers of this town who have been getting assassinated a lot lately and responding with very harsh laws to crack down on freedoms)

The "Plan": Warlock with very high disguise and bluff does everyone's make up so that no one will know who they are. He plans to shout out to distract everyone so the Wizard can do his thing.

The Wizard prepares a Dominate Person (ready to use with Sudden Silent) as they don't want to kill the Bard, merely take back what was stolen and hand him over to some sort of justice (but not the local evil and brutal kind)

And the Monk is ready to run in and grab the potions and run off before anyone knows what's happened if the Dominate fails.

Well the Bard comes to the docks on a chariot of fire (Most likely an illusion as he is known for doing many cool ones) and starts giving a big speech about he went off to ancient cursed ruins in order to find these potions which will grant you wonderful powers.

The Warlock picks this moment to distract the crowed and rather then shout out his planned "LOOK THE DRAGON IS BACK!" (The town was attacked 6 months ago by a baby Red dragon which was chased off) he decides to shout "Arrggggg another pillar of light!!!" (A few days before a great pillar of light was seen in the east, many people panicked that the world was going to come to an end ect)

A roll of a natural 20, a few action points chucked it giving +11 (often miscalled "hero dice" by the players) and a 20+ bonus if bluff.

"A bluff so good that surely even the God of trickery would have turned around."

The crowed turn, the Wizard dominates, the Monk grabs the potions and dives into the water to swim away quickly... a perfect plan... people start to panic as at least two spell casters in the crowed Dimensional door away instantly... the Sorcerer lord casts a globe of invulnerability and incinerates a few nearby peasants fearing that this confusion is the ploy of an assassins... the people stampede, many falling off the docks... the guards come rushing in to restore order.... another lesser sorcerer lord panics a does a cone of fire killing a few more people... full on riot ensues with high fatalities for the peasants... our mostly Good heroes look on in horror before deciding that maybe now isn't the best time to be out and about.

There was so much laughter that I thought I should share it with you all, now it's your turn!

[Keithicus]

My story isn't quite as long, and was from a silly one-shot with my nephews and a few others (one's 7 so it's not quite a mature game obviously).

My character was a sorcerer with 4 ranks in bluff (ECL 1). I go to the doors of the guarded fort that we have to take over, knock on the door, and say "pizza delivery"... and roll a natural 20. The DM gives me the glare of death and the guards summarily open the doors, one of them saying "about time", one saying "I don't remember ordering pizza", and the third one saying "what's a pizza?"... We proceed to fight them (which was still rather difficult due to nephews not contributing and unlucky rolls) and finish the adventure.

Not the most epic use, but one that caused quite a bit of laughter and an in-joke for some of my group for a while.

[Ranting Fool]

Doesn't have to be Epic, just funny is fine

Ah the Natural 20... the bane of DMs plans everwhere!

[Keithicus]

Well Natural 20s aren't auto-successes for skill checks (at least at my table... I "think" it's that way in the 3.5 rules anyway... it's late). It's just that I had a +4 Cha and +4 bluff, so a total of 28. The guards weren't the sharpest tools in the shed and even with him adding bonuses to their sense motive for such an implausible thing (how does one order a pizza in a pseudomedieval setting without magic... also what's a pizza? :P)

Their sense motive turned out to be a 1 (all of them that rolled for it got a 1)

[Yaitanos]

So here I was the bard, pretending to be drunk in the kings court while I entertain them with a song. Dancing and flitting about making a mockery of the court jester. Not using any bardic music less the court wizard decide to teach me how many watts are in a lightning bolt. The paranoid bishop having set out several candles of truth throughout the hall to keep people from lying about trying to kill him. (Well, it was more an attempt at the DM to catch the party rogue but eh) The plan was to get a large eye shaped jewel from the king's throne (tastelessly named the King's Eye), as it was the key to the lich's treasure vault. My part was to distract everyone so that the rogue could get it and slip it to the sorc who would then d-door out.

I however wasn't happy with how the party had been treating my poor bard so I decided to mix things up. I had been slipping stronger alcohol into my tankard the entire night, and made sleight of hand checks to let people see me do it. Now my bard had an amulet of proof against poison with a false aura on it so he couldn't get drunk. When the time came I slipped my hand into my vest to retrieve my flask of booze (which had a dimensional pocket modified to work like a haversack) and pulled out an identical flask that had a potion of glibness in it. After taking a drink I waited a few rounds then stood up straight, set my tankard down and looked directly at the king.

"Your highness, it is time this charade ends. I am an agent of the church of Pelor and I am hear to tell you that someone has made plans to steal the King's Eye." I also flashed a holy symbol of Pelor to give myself an equipment bonus to the bluff (worked out with the dm for a +1) and rolled a 17 on my bluff check. I was a 6th level bard, 6th level lyric thaumaturge so I had 15 ranks in bluff, a cha of 26 (19 base, +3 lvl bonus, and cloak of cha +4) and an item that gave me a +5 competence bonus to bluff for a whopping +29 before the +30 from glibness to a total bluff of 76. The entire party stopped and stared at me in and out of game. I continued "I have been sent by the Arch Bishop to retrieve the eye for safe keeping until we are able to apprehend the thieves."
The bishop went into a rampage saying that I was lying about it and that the king shouldn't do as I say, but I shut him up by pointing out the candles. The King then ordered the eye removed from the throne and given to me. Soon as I had it I bowed to him, gave him a blessing from Pelor and walked out of the room. Soon as I was out of earshot/sight I d-doored as far as I could. Twice. Met up with a very angry party a few days later at the entrance to the crypt.

[Sudain]

So here I was the bard, pretending to be drunk in the kings court while I entertain them with a song. Dancing and flitting about making a mockery of the court jester. Not using any bardic music less the court wizard decide to teach me how many watts are in a lightning bolt. The paranoid bishop having set out several candles of truth throughout the hall to keep people from lying about trying to kill him. (Well, it was more an attempt at the DM to catch the party rogue but eh) The plan was to get a large eye shaped jewel from the king's throne (tastelessly named the King's Eye), as it was the key to the lich's treasure vault. My part was to distract everyone so that the rogue could get it and slip it to the sorc who would then d-door out.

I however wasn't happy with how the party had been treating my poor bard so I decided to mix things up. I had been slipping stronger alcohol into my tankard the entire night, and made sleight of hand checks to let people see me do it. Now my bard had an amulet of proof against poison with a false aura on it so he couldn't get drunk. When the time came I slipped my hand into my vest to retrieve my flask of booze (which had a dimensional pocket modified to work like a haversack) and pulled out an identical flask that had a potion of glibness in it. After taking a drink I waited a few rounds then stood up straight, set my tankard down and looked directly at the king.

"Your highness, it is time this charade ends. I am an agent of the church of Pelor and I am hear to tell you that someone has made plans to steal the King's Eye." I also flashed a holy symbol of Pelor to give myself an equipment bonus to the bluff (worked out with the dm for a +1) and rolled a 17 on my bluff check. I was a 6th level bard, 6th level lyric thaumaturge so I had 15 ranks in bluff, a cha of 26 (19 base, +3 lvl bonus, and cloak of cha +4) and an item that gave me a +5 competence bonus to bluff for a whopping +29 before the +30 from glibness to a total bluff of 76. The entire party stopped and stared at me in and out of game. I continued "I have been sent by the Arch Bishop to retrieve the eye for safe keeping until we are able to apprehend the thieves."
The bishop went into a rampage saying that I was lying about it and that the king shouldn't do as I say, but I shut him up by pointing out the candles. The King then ordered the eye removed from the throne and given to me. Soon as I had it I bowed to him, gave him a blessing from Pelor and walked out of the room. Soon as I was out of earshot/sight I d-doored as far as I could. Twice. Met up with a very angry party a few days later at the entrance to the crypt.

Amazing! I love it. :)

[The Redwolf]

I've only played in a couple of campaigns so far, but I got natural 20's on bluff in both of them. In the first I was messing with a friend of mine and he had been asleep in the inn, I woke him up and since I was chaotic neutral he said I should be doing more chaotic stuff because up to that point I hadn't done anything. I should note I was a half orc barbarian and he was a human monk and we were in a dwarven town, so nobody there liked me but he was decently well-liked.

He said that so I decided to take the massive sword the DM had homebrewed in to convince me to play (I'm very glad he did) and cut the bed in half. The innkeeper, a dwarf, came up to see what had happened and immediately suspected me, so I tried to bluff him to convince him my friend had chopped it in half with his hand, since was a monk. I rolled and confirmed a natural 20 so my friend had to take the ruined pieces of the bed around town to sell them for scrap and then earn enough money to pay the innkeeper back.

Second campaign and I was a druid this time of a race we made up for our world because we thought it would be cool. I had a rhino for an animal companion. Another one of our friends was a spellscale, a rather obscure race from a 3.5 book that mature really fast and live in seclusion, so his character was like 15 and this was his first time out of their isolated mountain valley. He came down to the stables my friend and I were staying in with my rhino because he hadn't seen a rhino before and being a sorcerer he was curious. He comes in and points to my rhino and asks if it's a rhino, I ask the DM if I can try to bluff him and he agrees. I roll a natural 20 to convince him I am in fact a rhinoceros, he rolls a natural 1 on sense motive. Therefore, for the next few in game days he had to roleplay believing and trying to convince people that I was a rhinoceros.

[umbergod]

So here I was the bard, pretending to be drunk in the kings court while I entertain them with a song. Dancing and flitting about making a mockery of the court jester. Not using any bardic music less the court wizard decide to teach me how many watts are in a lightning bolt. The paranoid bishop having set out several candles of truth throughout the hall to keep people from lying about trying to kill him. (Well, it was more an attempt at the DM to catch the party rogue but eh) The plan was to get a large eye shaped jewel from the king's throne (tastelessly named the King's Eye), as it was the key to the lich's treasure vault. My part was to distract everyone so that the rogue could get it and slip it to the sorc who would then d-door out.

I however wasn't happy with how the party had been treating my poor bard so I decided to mix things up. I had been slipping stronger alcohol into my tankard the entire night, and made sleight of hand checks to let people see me do it. Now my bard had an amulet of proof against poison with a false aura on it so he couldn't get drunk. When the time came I slipped my hand into my vest to retrieve my flask of booze (which had a dimensional pocket modified to work like a haversack) and pulled out an identical flask that had a potion of glibness in it. After taking a drink I waited a few rounds then stood up straight, set my tankard down and looked directly at the king.

"Your highness, it is time this charade ends. I am an agent of the church of Pelor and I am hear to tell you that someone has made plans to steal the King's Eye." I also flashed a holy symbol of Pelor to give myself an equipment bonus to the bluff (worked out with the dm for a +1) and rolled a 17 on my bluff check. I was a 6th level bard, 6th level lyric thaumaturge so I had 15 ranks in bluff, a cha of 26 (19 base, +3 lvl bonus, and cloak of cha +4) and an item that gave me a +5 competence bonus to bluff for a whopping +29 before the +30 from glibness to a total bluff of 76. The entire party stopped and stared at me in and out of game. I continued "I have been sent by the Arch Bishop to retrieve the eye for safe keeping until we are able to apprehend the thieves."
The bishop went into a rampage saying that I was lying about it and that the king shouldn't do as I say, but I shut him up by pointing out the candles. The King then ordered the eye removed from the throne and given to me. Soon as I had it I bowed to him, gave him a blessing from Pelor and walked out of the room. Soon as I was out of earshot/sight I d-doored as far as I could. Twice. Met up with a very angry party a few days later at the entrance to the crypt.

that was amazing!!