[Nexus] The Wall III: Wall Harder

[Lord Magtok]

Company policy.

That excuse doesn't really work when you own the company and write the policy, you know.

[The Alexandrian]

You should probably conduct all of the important interviews in person. The last thing that you want to do is to hire a Deep One as a chorus girl or a raptor as a...y'know.

I'm not interested in applying for the bouncer job, I was just pointing something out. I'd like to apply for one of the less than child-friendly jobs. You'll have to excuse me for not writing my name here. I don't want random people to be able to identify who I am from my handwriting alone.

[Hattish Thing]

Oh, excellent! I shall call you Ms. Doe here. Alright Ms. Doe, how about you head over to The Ritzzz soon and we can have a little meet. My name is Ritzy, by the way.


My players going to quickly make a brief thread titled The Ritzzz, and you can show up there?

Magtok, can it. You're just mad 'cause I'm taking your customers.

[happyturtle]

Exactly Blondie. We'd be happy to offer you a very well paying job to help us catch cheaters. See, we know people will cheat, so we need a very good cheater on our side, to help a bit. Would you accept Ms...? And pardon me, I'm not very good with people.

What makes you think I'm female?

[Hattish Thing]

What makes you think I'm female?

A good guess. Your sexist comment mostly. The men I know certainly don't make comments like that about their own behavior, after all.

[Morty]

Something tells me that "the men you know" aren't a very good sample to extrapolate male behaviour from.

[Hattish Thing]

Something tells me that "the men you know" aren't a very good sample to extrapolate male behaviour from.

I work at a casino and strip club. What did you expect?

[Lord Magtok]

I did that casino thing for a while before it went bust, and I can't recall anyone accusing me of sexism.

[happyturtle]

A good guess. Your sexist comment mostly. The men I know certainly don't make comments like that about their own behavior, after all.

I wasn't making the comment about my own behaviour.

[Recaiden]

I work at a casino and strip club. What did you expect?

You know no one outside of work? Sad.

[KerfuffleMach2]

Nexus Weekly Weather Report
Brought to you by MagMart.

Inside

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Monday: PM Rain. High of 75 F (23.9 C), low of 57 F (13.9 C). Chance of rain 70%. Winds SW at 14 mph (22.5 k/h).

Tuesday: Showers. High of 69 F (20.5 C), low of 52 F (11.1 C). Chance of rain 50%. Winds NNW at 5 mph (8 k/h).

Wednesday: AM Showers. High of 69 F (20.5 C), low of 49 F (9.4 C). Chance of rain 30%. Winds N at 8 mph (12.9 k/h).

Thursday: Mostly Sunny. High of 72 F (22.2 C), low of 52 F (11.1 C). Chance of rain 0%. Winds SE at 5 mph (8 k/h).

Friday: Partly Cloudy. High of 76 F (24.4 C), low of 57 F (13.9 C). Chance of rain 0%. Winds SSW at 7 mph (11.3 k/h).

Saturday: Partly Cloudy. High of 77 F (25 C), low of 58 F (14.4 C). Chance of rain 0%. Winds SW at 4 mph (6.4 k/h).

Sunday: Cloudy. High of 78 F (25.6 C), low of 60 F (15.6 C). Chance of rain 0%. Winds SW at 6 mph (9.7 k/h).

Outside

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Monday: Partly Cloudy. High of 73 F (22.8 C), low of 53 F (11.7 C). Chance of rain 10%. Winds N at 10 mph (16.1 k/h).

Tuesday: Partly Cloudy. High of 77 F (25 C), low of 53 F (11.7 C). Chance of rain 0%. Winds NNW at 11 mph (17.7 k/h).

Wednesday: Mostly Sunny. High of 76 F (24.4 C), low of 53 F (11.7 C). Chance of rain 0%. Winds NW at 8 mph (12.9 k/h).

Thursday: Sunny. High of 72 F (22.2 C), low of 53 F (11.7 C). Chance of rain 0%. Winds WSW at 9 mph (14.5 k/h).

Friday: Mostly Sunny. High of 69 F (20.6 C), low of 53 F (11.7 C). Chance of rain 0%. Winds W at 8 mph (12.9 k/h).

Saturday: Cloudy. High of 68 F (20 C), low of 55 F (12.8 C). Chance of rain 0%. Winds WNW at 8 mph (12.9 k/h).

Sunday: Mostly Sunny. High of 73 F (22.8 C), low of 56 F (13.3 C). Chance of rain 10%. Winds W at 8 mph (12.9 k/h).

Riverside

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Monday: Showers. High of 74 F (23.3 C), low of 69 F (20.6 C). Chance of rain 50%. Winds E at 10 mph (16.1 k/h).

Tuesday: Thunderstorms. High of 77 F (25 C), low of 71 F (21.7 C). Chance of rain 60%. Winds E at 11 mph (17.7 k/h).

Wednesday: Scattered Thunderstorms. High of 77 F (25 C), low of 70 F (21.1 C). Chance of rain 60%. Winds E at 12 mph (19.3 k/h).

Thursday: Scattered Thunderstorms. High of 78 F (25.6 C), low of 69 F (20.6 C). Chance of rain 60%. Winds ESE at 12 mph (19.3 k/h).

Friday: Scattered Showers. High of 79 F (26.1 C), low of 69 F (20.6 C). Chance of rain 30%. Winds SSE at 12 mph (19.3 k/h).

Saturday: Scattered Thunderstorms. High of 78 F (25.6 C), low of 69 F (20.6 C). Chance of rain 40%. Winds SE at 12 mph (19.3 k/h).

Sunday: Partly Cloudy. High of 80 F (26.7 C), low of 68 F (20 C). Chance of rain 20%. Winds SSE at 14 mph (22.5 k/h).

[OrchestraHc]

Appearing as beams of light, shimmering, suspended millimeters from the wall:

Oh my, so much communication in this place...

Oh my my, it seems as though I'm communicating as well!

How EXCITING! Hello all! I'm happy to communicate with you!

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Oh my, so much communication in this place...

Oh my my, it seems as though I'm communicating as well!

How EXCITING! Hello all! I'm happy to communicate with you!

((Do let me know if this is ever a bother to read, especially the yellow bit.))

[Hattish Thing]

Go back. There's no intelligent life to communicate with here.

[Earl of Purple]

!em htiw etacinummoc nac uoY
.hguoht taht htiw elbuort evah yllanoisacco I
.sdrawkcab sklat enoyrevE

!EM OT ESNES EKAM UOY T'NAC YHW

[horngeek]

.evitcepsrep ruo morf sdrawkcab gniklat eno eht er'uoY

[Earl of Purple]

!klat yzarc s'tahT
!dam lla er'uoY

.od syawla I .nottub 'thgir ngila' eht sserp t'ndid uoy ,oslA

[Devixer]

.tohs a gniht sdrawkcab gnitirw siht evig ot gnilliw m'I , lleW
!yug elprup ,olleH

[OrchestraHc]

Oh my, backwards communication! How...

novel? clever? EXCITING!? neat?

Neat.

How neat!

.flesym rof ti yrt ot evah lliw I
.nwo ruo morf deppaws si evitcepsrep ruoy fi tfel dengila eb txet ruoy t'ndluow dnA
.murtceps ym deppaws I fi neppah dluow tahw rednow I !nuf si siht ,ym hO

?ythguan ?htuocnu ?reporpmi ?oobat ...sleef sihT !YM !hO
;D .ythguan gnieb m'I !ti s'taht ,sey hO

Wait, what was that? ;D... :O! :D :U :P ;9 XD

Nobody panic! I have invented crude drawings of faces using letters. I will name them... Facey-shapey-things! Good name. High five. (^-^)/*\(^-^)

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Oh my, backwards communication! How...

novel? clever? EXCITING!? neat?

Neat.

How neat!

I will have to try it for myself.
And wouldn't your text be aligned left if your perspective is swapped from our own.
Oh my, this is fun! I wonder what would happen if I swapped my spectrum.

Oh! MY! This feels... taboo? improper? uncouth? naughty?
Oh yes, that's it! I'm being naughty. ;D

Wait, what was that? ;D... :O! :D :U :P ;9 XD

Nobody panic! I have invented crude drawings of faces using letters. I will name them... Facey-shapey-things! Good name. High five. (^-^)/*\(^-^)

((Never combine two online text converters. I'm never doing that again.))

[Lord Magtok]

The hell kind of magical chalk are you using, Rainbows? Also, you'll all just have to make do with frontwards-facing MagText, as I'm not changing this for anyone.

[OrchestraHc]

Chalk? No. Light! :D

It's okay. I was confused at first too. ;)

It was pretty surprising when I found out it was just dust reflecting colors of light. :O

But I'm using real light. It's easy! You should try it too! :)

Also use more facey-shapey-things! ;9 I invented them, y'know.

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Chalk? No. Light! :D

It's okay. I was confused at first too. ;)

It was pretty surprising when I found out it was just dust reflecting colors of light. :O

But I'm using real light. It's easy! You should try it too! :)

Also use more facey-shapey-things! ;9 I invented them, y'know.

[Devixer]

Hey rainbow-light, you should call your little text-drawings 'emoticons.'

[OrchestraHc]

Hmm. Emoticons?

I don't get that at all. :(

E-moti-cons. Emoti-cons. Emo-ticons. Emot-icons. Emotico-ns... :U

I don't understand it, but if it makes you happy, sure. :)

Attention everyone, facey-shapey-things are now known as an emoticons!

Please use them to your heart's content! :D

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Hmm. Emoticons?

I don't get that at all. :(

E-moti-cons. Emoti-cons. Emo-ticons. Emot-icons. Emotico-ns... :U

I don't understand it, but if it makes you happy, sure. :)

Attention everyone, facey-shapey-things are now known as an emoticons!

Please use them to your heart's content! :D

[Asha'man]

There are a couple of parchments posted to the wall somewhat far from one another though they all contain the same message. The poster likely thought that more copies would make his message more noticeable. The parchment reads,

I am a swordsman yet I lack a sword. I am also a swordsmith and I would ordinarily just make myself a sword, however I cannot. Simple iron and steel makes a poor weapon for this dangerous world. I plan to embark on a journey to collect worthy materials.Therein lies my problem as I cannot do this alone. I cannot reward with monetarily gain as I have no vast stacks of gold with me but I can reward in another way. I can make the sword I plan to make for myself for those that will help me. A word of warning, this will be a long journey. I await at the crossroads in the grasslands. (Outside)

(If anyone is interested say so in the OOC, before I post anything in outside otherwise it tends to get drowned in the multitude of plots there.)

[Earl of Purple]

.yug a ton llits tub ,rehtie ,lag a toN !yug a ton m'I
.tey meht tem t'nevah I -won morf emit gnol a dnik ym fo rehtona morf ffo dub lliw I

.suxeN eht ni ereh em ekil skool taht ydobyna deretnuoucne t'nevah I

((I don't use a text converter- I write everything forwards first, then work from the full stop and reverse the words.sdrow eht esrever dna pots lluf eht morf krow neht ,tsrif sdrawrof gnihtyreve etirw I -retrevnoc txet a esu t'nod I))

[OrchestraHc]

A public-use T.V (used because not everyone can nail an HDTV to the wall whenever they want) flickers on and a poor quality commercial begins playing:

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A pair of halfings, a man and a women, sit together in a living room. "A-Aren't these lazy afternoons on the couch lovely, dear?" she says nervously, fiddling with the pearl necklace around her neck and trying like mad not to look at the camera.

The man lowers his paper and almost robotically turns his head to her and nods, a perfectly neutral expression on his face.

"Oh no. Wh-Whats that coming out of the floor." The camera pans to the floor and the hard wood bangs twice before a blue shovel punches through the floor and then someone in a cheap looking star-nosed mole costume pokes his head out. "Oh no," the woman screams again, "the mole- mole men are invading and they ruined our lovely floor what do we doooo?" She holds her hands up in fear while her "dear" calmly folds the newspaper on his lap before putting his hands up as well, his expression unchanged.

"Don't be blue," a husky voice calls from off camera, "call Da Crew." Suddenly the camera cuts to a halfling dressed in overalls and an orange construction workers helmet.

"Da Crew Industries?" she asks like it was supposed to be said in chorus with her husband, though he failed to join in.

"That's right ma'am," the heroic halfling says as he strolls in, "and not only will we defeat them pesky mole men," the halfling kicks the mole man in the head, releasing a restrained "OW" from the poor guy in the suit, "but we'll also," the camera points at the hole and with a sparkle effect and fade it changes to a perfectly fixed hardwood floor, "fix the damages it caused."

"Wow. It's better than... new," she says giving the floor a dainty pat.

"A'course it is," the hero says before turning to the camera. "All work by Da Crew industries is quality assured. Just ask one of our many faithful customers."

There's a cut to a blond young man shot from the chest up. A caption underneath needs says he's Justin Mine: Loyal Customer.

"When I needed a large tree moved, I called Da Crew Industries, and I don't think anyone could have done it as quickly, efficiently, or as well priced by anyone else." He speaks without stuttering, overacting and is probably the only person saying anything believably. One would think he was an actor if it didn't seem like they couldn't afford one.

It cuts back to the living room and the hero of the commercial standing proudly with his hands at his waist. "Da Crew Industries is available for mercenary work, construction, and landscaping. Call today!" A large orange Da Crew Ind. and their phone number is layed over the screen, and the terrible jingle plays, sung by a chorus of tone deaf halflings:

"When somethin' is troublin' you,
Don't be blue.
Just call Da Crew!"

Beautiful. Absolutely Beautiful.

[Darkcomet]

...haaah.

On something else entirely...

Quick poll for you nutjobs: Should dragon liver busters be illegal?

[Lord Magtok]

There should be a legal waiver or something, but pretty much anyone who chooses to drink that thing should know what to expect. If they hurt themselves, it's their own fault.

[Aric Kale]

Don't make them illegal! They're great for pranks!

I second that. With less emoticons...

[Darkcomet]

I dunno, I keep hearing they're getting used to burn things.

What do they even put in that stuff?

[Lord Magtok]

Alcohol, maybe? Anyways, making something illegal doesn't make people stop buying it. Are you sure you want to make it a black market item? I mean, with Nexus magic and technology, rum-running is pretty cheap and easy. I'm pretty sure I have a fedora and nifty suit stashed somewhere, too.