GitP Dwarf Fortress Succession Game 4: Dwarves on Patrol

[Wookieetank]

Those four dead guys sound suspiciously like our militia squad members.

Will have to investigate this claim this evening. Now that I'm out of houseguests to distract me, hopefully progress will be a bit faster.

[Wookieetank]

Journal of Wookiee ze Tank:

Spoiler

Show

7th of Limestone, 126: An ambush has arrived! Looks like more Broglins. Maybe we should build them a frat house and then routinely douse it in lava. Sounds like a sound plan to me.

14th of Limestone, 126: For some reason I recieve the following annoucement today: "The Dwarven chid Belbil Thakolin has come! A short, strudy create fon of drink and industry." I'm not sure why this is noteworthy, but non-ambushy news is always welcome.

25th of Limestone, 126: Apparently the broglins caught wind of Melbil Thakolin, for they have sent a snatcher to infiltrate the fort.

1st of Sandstone, 126: We have more motivated dwarves on our hands! 5 more of our brethern have taken up (new?) professions. Progress!

2nd of Sandstone, 126: After doing a once over of our stockpiles, I have discovered we have dropped under 2000 drink. The brewers have been whipped into production. So apparently we have a boar named Urist Avuzerar wandering around, I approve of whoever is naming the animals.

4th of Sandstone, 126: Apparently we've attracted no migrants this season, thank Armok. Got too many layabouts (33 as of this writing) here these days *grumble grumble* kids in my yard *grumble grumble*.

6th of Sandstone, 126: Today marks the coming of the Forgotten Beast Bosa Zomstosbub to our caverns. It is a great quadruped composed of grime and filth. It has three long, spiral horns and it has a gaunt appearance. Beware its poisonous gas! Alright, who left the remains of the dwarven chili cookoff lying about.

28th of Sandstone, 126: We have yet another Forgotten Beast in our lands. Ungu Rusmoulux Sodorngos, A huge humanoid composed of mud. It has two short horns and it appears to be emaciated. Beware its poisonous sting! I can't help but think that our dwarves would be greatly entertained if we could but find away to pit all these Forgotten Beasts against one another in gladitorial combat.

12th of Timber, 126: The outpost Liaison and caravan from Zuntir Momuz arrived today. It was a nice break from sitting idly by the magma sea listening to the distant roar of our Forgotten Beast Zoo above, imagining all the ways I could creatively smite the pointy eared tree huggers. We also seem to have a Siege as a "vile force of darkness" is upon us.

15th of Timber, 126: Not our finest hour as Erib Cattenlumash has been found dead, and a donky has been stricken by melancholy. I still wonder why I'm being informed of the mental well being of our pack animals, but I'm starting to feel sorry for the poor buggers.

10th of Moonstone, 126: We now have our very own possessed Jeweler! Quick get a sheet and we can have a real life ghost! For once the possession makes sense at least, as our jeweler has claimed a Jeweler's workshop. I'm actually surprised by this unexpected turn of events.

15th of Moonstone, 126: Our possessed Jeweler in the Jeweler's Workshop has created a PERFECT resin opal. Mayhaps the silly humes will be impressed by it and give us all their goods. One can only hope.

8th of Opal, 126: Things have been soothing recently, no more additions to our Forgotten Beast Zoo, and no more broglins or pointy eared hippies.

[Clarkson]

Wouldn't mind being dorfed. Probably one of those 33 you mentioned.

[iyaerP]

You know what having 33 idlers means right? That you should start a megaproject.

I already have one planned for my next turn.

Alternatively, you could finish our roof if that still isn't done. We haven't had any pictures of it in a while so I dunno.

[Wookieetank]

Journal of Wookieetank Overseer:

Spoiler

Show

13th of Obsidian, 126: The Broglins have been laying low recently, but today they showed their ugly snarling faces again as a Snatcher has decided to brave our many traps to get at our children.

20th of Obsidian, 126: Looks like the snatcher was just the beginning as we now have an amush on our hands. Having just discovered how to order everyone inside, I have now done so.

3rd of Granite, 126: A new year and with it a new overseer. A couple more dwarves have grown unnaturally attached to steel objects, and thankfully I don't have to deal with it.

Save

[Luzahn]

Please post within 24 hours if you want the next turn.

I'll be putting my name in.

[McDouggal]

*delurks* Busy until Friday, but I might be able to do it Saturday and Sunday. Key word is might. *relurks*

[Grif]

You know what having 33 idlers means right? That you should start a megaproject.

I already have one planned for my next turn.

Alternatively, you could finish our roof if that still isn't done. We haven't had any pictures of it in a while so I dunno.

I finished the large part of our roof during my turn. I think the only unroofed part would be the farms to the west of the river.

[Luzahn]

By the way, do the farms/pastures need continued sunlight?

[Grif]

Not in 31.25. I haven't tested it in this version though.

[Gnoman]

Once outside and lit, always outside and lit. That has not chaged.

[iyaerP]

I will put my name in the hat.

[Luzahn]

iyaerP, you've got it.

[iyaerP]

So I have once again been appointed overseer of our glorious city, and I must say it is disturbing. It is one thing to notice changes as a citizen, it is another thing to be overseer and have to look at the big picture, and I must say that it is a colossal mess. Almost all of the work I did during my previous reign has been undone, and some madman decided to not only divert the river off to the side, cutting off the supply of fresh water to our well and fort, but also causing massive flooding, and one of the new channels cuts off merchant wagon access from the north.

Further review shows that stone block construction was suspended indefinitely, an order that I immediately rescinded as stone blocks are the literal foundation of our mighty fortress. I have gone over the supply records and see nothing of immediate alarm, although the fact that almost 30% of our fort is idle at any given time is a cause for concern.

Further review of the current fort design shows a dangerous vulnerability in our fortress walls that would allow any invader capable of breaking down a door to simply walk around to the south and be into our fortress proper. I brought this up to previous overseers who were quick to allay my fears, but now that I can see that it was never addressed. I have detailed a construction crew to see to it and wall off the offending location.

After that, my most pressing concern is getting ever dwarf back to work. Idle dwarves are unhappy dwarves, and I have plenty of things for them all to be doing. New mining tunnels have been designated, a new dam to reign in the river-ruining folly of wookietank designed, and planning on the WEAPON has begun.

Spoiler

Show

[iyaerP]

8th of Granite: So I have just noticed a pack of human merchants in the river under the bridge, just merrily treading water. I can only chalk it up to the insane actions of one of the previous overseers. They, along with several of their pack animals are just loitering in the moat around our front gate area. This is the same moat that serves to divert our precious river. I am working on plans to fix it and wall it in so that the river might resume its normal course.

17th of Felsite: I have spent most of the spring working on a project to remove the lake left by overseer Wookietank. It has been a massive time consuming head-ache as dwarves refuse to wall off areas that are already partially flooded, and thus that option is lost to me. Further complications arose from labour competition with the WEAPON project, but such is the nature of things. A score of immigrants helped a great deal with the labour shortage, and I was finally ready to being counter-draining the channel that feeds the lake pool when the elven merchants arrived. Delegating such unimportant tasks to the appropriate minions, I had just ordered the breach that would set the flood stopping into motion when ANOTHER bloody interruption came to my desk. Rounding on the delivery dwarf in a furious rage, it wasn't until I heard him stammering something about a vile force of darkness that I dragged myself away from my engineering. The "siege" if it can be called such, is nothing more than a single squadron of hammer-broglins led by some self-important fool atop a war crocodile. I have no doubt that there are more of them skulking about in the shadows, but for now, I send the military to their standard stations, ring the alarm bell to get the civilians back inside, and return to my work, telling the messenger to come and get me only if the military proved so remarkably incompetent as to be bested by this single threat.

[Luzahn]

Be sure to eat the crocodile.

[Grif]

Be sure to eat the crocodile.

Don't forget the bone bolts.

[Wookieetank]

Aw, poor lake. Bodies of water have feelings too ya know. Guess I'll just have to remake the lake when my turn comes back around. I'll put a wall along the edge of the map this time around so that it actually fills up fully.

[iyaerP]

Aw, poor lake. Bodies of water have feelings too ya know. Guess I'll just have to remake the lake when my turn comes back around. I'll put a wall along the edge of the map this time around so that it actually fills up fully.

Oh I am already actually working on that. The drainage to the depths was just to prevent the constant reflooding that stops dwarves from building because there is 2/7 water. Once I have got the dam in place, I'll close the drainage pipe and let the lake fill up. Because before, it was just draining off the map edge and being stupid and laggy. I only just hit summer and am already mostly done with the lake. I am much more concerned with how much labor I will be albe to get into the WEAPON before my turn is up.

Although going back to the drainage pipes for a moment, we have like four dwarves in the process of drowning because they decided to chase after a spare mechanism that got left inside of the pipe during bridge-building. The only reason I care at all is because one of them is a militia commander. What he was doing down there, I don't have the foggiest idea.

Oh, and the siege was broken purely with a nice shower of bolts. Turns out it was only the one squad of broglin hammermen after all. Only casualty was the lookout piglet.

[Grif]

Oh, and the siege was broken purely with a nice shower of bolts. Turns out it was only the one squad of broglin hammermen after all. Only casualty was the lookout piglet.

Good to see our crack squad of marksdwarves doing so well. (Most are already professional or thereabouts during my turn. Should be a few elites by now.)

[iyaerP]

Good to see our crack squad of marksdwarves doing so well. (Most are already professional or thereabouts during my turn. Should be a few elites by now.)

They were murder incarnate on my LAST turn. That was like 6 ingame years ago. I should hope that they are doing well nowadays with thirce the number and plenty of years of practice.

edit for update:

18th of Hematite: Our most expert sniper dwarves eliminated the "siege" as I knew they would, but we were all surprised, I think, when it turned out to only be one squad of broglins after all. I am pleased to note that not a single dwarf died of enemy action. Of their own foolishness however, that is another matter. No fewer than NINE dwarves of the fortress for various unknowable reasons, attempted to enter the drainage pipe that works to remove the lake enough so that we may properly finish the planned dam. Five of them drown, including one of our marksdwarves. The rest were assorted peons, children and other such common rabble. Efforts to carve out an escape tunnel for them only caused more flooding, although one did escape out of it, and the rest that escaped did so out of the main doors that are there for that purpose. The airlock setup for the doors prevented flooding from reaching the fortress proper, and I ordered the area as a restricted zone for all the good that it will do.

The lake seems to be going down at any rate, and the dam should be up in no time. The elves left in a hissy fit after being accidentally offered a pig tail bracelet, but we had already procured most of the useful animals off of them, and our fortress is sufficiently prosperous, that nothing else that they carry is direly needed.

25th of Hematite: Another wave of migrants comes to the fort, bringing much needed laborers. Clearly they have heard of my grand design. Speaking of which, the WEAPON is coming along nicely, although I will have to come up with a better name for it than that. Something that captures its purpose, design, and the doom it will wreak among our foes all in one dreadful word. I shall have to think on this.

19th of Malachite: A carpenter has withdrawn from society and produced an artifact table out of wood, iron, some bones and some gems. I order it put into our main dining room with a masterwork seat set at it so that all the fort may admire it's craftsdwarfship.

8th of Galena: The dam is finished and the lake drainage tunnel sealed off once more. The lake will now flood back up to full, but without the constant drainage off the the west, and our river is no longer diverted. Also, this will serve quite nicely as a moat to deter our enemies.

11th of Galena: Human merchants are here, and I must see to them. The WEAPON is a little over half done. If the pattern of caravan arrival coinciding with goblin ambushes holds true, by the time the Dwarven caravan arrives, we will be ready to test it.

[iyaerP]

Another season has passed, and so too comes another update on my progress.

The human merchants arrive and take their wagons through the most hidiously convoluted path possible to get to our gates, including wading through the slowly filling moat. Since said moat will soon be impassable, I order the bridging of it to what I am now thinking of as the north eastern shore. A slight misnomer, but it is of trivial concern. Also, I designate all trees in the area for cutting, so that when our own dwarven caravan arrives, we don't look like some kind of elven hippy villiage. The caravan wagons are accompanied by a pair of ambushes and a snatcher, but their own guards are able to repel the attacks even though two wagons are lost. As they make no effort to reclaim the goods from the destroyed wagons, I mark them to be relocated inside when we have labor availible. When the merchants finally reach our depot, they refuse to trade, and loiter around for a month or two before leaving. I can think of no cause for this wierdness in behaviour.

OOC: I think the game bugged out. The first of the merchants to arrive had no wagons, only the usual pack animals and had reached our depot and allowed trading options before the wagons showed up. Once the wagons arrived however, I lost all trade options, including the ability to send goods to the depot. The option to order our broker there, however, was still active.

13th of Limestone: Reports from the walls indicate that a horrible night creature has come to prey upon the fortress.

Spoiler

Show

The bestial monster tears apart a random human who was loitering near the edge of our territory before making his way towards the walls, taking one crossbow bolt to his knee to chip a legbone, turns back into a human and walks off the map. I must say, that was dissapointingly anti-climactic.

6th of Sandstone: The outpost liason from LAST YEAR is shown to my desk after ineffectively trying to corner our buffoon of a mayor into a meeting. Apparently it took him this long to figure out that the mayor is simply a figurehead and that the true power is wielded by the overseer. He says that he has been empowered by the Mountainhome to appoint a Baron to lead us. Knowing not to fall into the trap of claiming that we need no such foolishness, and knowing better than to appoint myself, I contemplate. Although the perks would be nice, the obligations would push my workload to maddening levels. The WEAPON project is in its final stages and requires every once of my architechtural skills to complete. Our previously mentioned buffoon of a mayor is also a quickly dismissed notion simply due to how ineffectual he is, but given his nature as a false front for the true wielders of power, it is an appealing notion. In the end, I decide upon Lulzahn, a previous overseer, and the one most responsible for us settling here. Clearly he will be competant as he ran this place when it was naught but a hole in the ground. Mayhaps, he will even be able to take some of the workload off of my or future overseer's shoulders. Not any of the important things, but dealing with the trivialities, such as the merchants and liasons. I give him the name and he then moves on to our trading negotiations, something I quickly am able to hammer out by simply asking for bars, booze, weapons, and armour. The only ore here is tetrahedrite, and silver simply doesn't work well as armour. We have a decent stockpile that we have assembled over the years, but much to my dismay, I find that the exceptional weaponsmith we had in residence during my last tenure as overseer has passed away in the meantime, so we shall have to rely on the mountainhomes for now. I order one of the furnace operators to construct nonstop copper weapons until his workdwarfship is at an acceptable level, and then get back to work on my all consuming task.

2nd of Timber: Migrants. Our population is now 112. Two useful looking dwarves are recruited into the military, and the rest assigned as masons. We need every scrap of manual labour at this point.

9th of Timber: Let this day be known for the rest of our history as a day of rejoicing and a day of VICTORY, for the WEAPON is now complete. I personally assembled the last windmill that was required to power the pumpstack, and ordered a minion below to throw the lever opening the floodgate to allow the reservoir to fill. It is at this time that I give the assembled dwarves of our stronghold a speech. I won't go into detail here, but suffice to say, I think it went over well. I also revelaed the name of our weapon: FLOODER. Fluids in Low Orbit Optimized for Deadly Enemy Removal is the acronym that I worked out and despite "low orbit" being a bit of a stretch, I think that it fits quite nicely. The filling is going well enough, but it is going to take a long time before FLOODER is ready to fire. Or at least with enough water to drown anything other than a kitten. Ideally, I should have liked to make it with magma rather than water, like the dwarven WEAPONs of the fortresses of yore, but the lack of magma safe metals makes that a difficult proposition at best. The pressurized water flow should be sufficient for our purposes. Indeed if my math is correct, having a full reservoir upon firing and leaving the pressure on will output so much water that it risks coming over our own walls and flooding the fortress itself. Clearly, no drownable enemy will survive such a deluge. For now, the river is being slowly drained upwards into the FLOODER reservoir, and our moat is no longer the obstacle it was mere weeks ago. Once FLOODER is charged, things should revert to normal.

16th the Dwarven caravan has arrived. Hopefully, this one will be more successful at trading with us that either of the last two were.

[Luzahn]

Odd with the humans. A trader must have died that was stuck on the map, and so they got scared and stopped trading.

And the water thing is because dwarves are stupid. Occasionally a tile must be dropping to 2 or 1, but then filling up again once the dwarf tries to walk across there. I once lost half of a starting fort when they tried to walk across the river at the top of the map and got washed downstream. A sort of reverse waterfall effect.

[Wookieetank]

Aw, we didn't get to add the newest beastie to our zoo in the caverns.

[MonarchAnarch]

....an arrow to the knee. really.

[iyaerP]

....an arrow to the knee. really.

Spoiler

Show

Nope. A bolt. And since dwarf fortress does not handle joints except via wrestling, I decided that this wouldn't be that big of a stretch. After all, the knee is part of the lower leg. The funny thing is that immediately after taking said bolt, the full moon ran out, he turned back into a human and fled off the map. The situation was too good not to use it.

And for those not wondering why this part of my turn is taking so bloody long, it is because I am experimenting with DF hack to try and get the bloody merchants to work properly. Because they keep showing up first on food and willing to trade. Then as soon as the wagons get inside, they decide to just sit idle inside our depot for 2 months and then lead. I am save-scumming while trying to debug it, for which I do apologize, but if this keeps up we will never see another merchant again.

Well, as far as I can tell, the game refuses to let two merchants try and trade at once and we have a pack of "traders" (not merchants. they appear as friendly foriegn dwarves) that have sat on the map all year, and now they make a B-line for the depot, and immediately turn around and leave, the wagons going with them. Killing them makes the wagons turn around and leave, killing the wagons makes the wagons turn around and leave. I don't have a clue how to fix this.

[MonarchAnarch]

This may be a bit simplistic, but have you rebuilt the trade depot?

I am anxiously awaiting for that were-tortoise to return..limping onto screen.

[iyaerP]

So despite all of my efforts screwing around in/learning DFHack, I wasn't able to figure out anything that saved the caravans from their fate of walking in and then walking back out again. However, a single use of the clean command managed to improve the framrate by 5 whole FPS. And since we have been hovering around 20 for my entire turn, I consider that a win.

23rd of Timber: A dwarf who was possessed during my failed attempts at getting our brothers from the mountainhomes to do any mercantile activity at all has crafted an artifact gem. Huzzah. Whatshisname's amazing creation will be remembered in all annals of dwarven histoy as the guy I didn't care enough about to even bother reading his announcement of the creation. On a more important note, attempts at discerning why our brethren from the mountainhomes came all this distance just to snub us by turning around and leaving remain unanswered. It can't possibly have been the goblin ambush as the caravan has weathered worse attacks in the past, and this one didn't even get near them. I find myself strangely unoccupied and shiftless since the completion of WEAPON:FLOODER, as without some great task to work on, I feel almost.... incomplete.

25th of Moonstone: Word reached me today that the resivour of WEAPON:FLOODER is now completely full as is our moat. This pleases me. What also pleases me is to be busy again. I have decided to extend our roads from the front gates to reach the point where caravans seem to favor entering our territory. Something about the natural lay of the land I am sure. This will prevent having to constantly clear the trees that grow up and block the route to the fort. The engineering of a good road surface is a fun diversion from the tedium of being overseer, and although my year is almost up, I am starting to enjoy myself. The sight of the towering stone cistern atop our mighty stone citadel brings pride to my heart and I feel like our fortress is now invincible.

9th of Opal: Word has come to me that our miners, while performing a routine search pattern in the depths, have struck an adamantine vien some 5 z-levels above the magma sea, an unprecedentedly high level. I have carefully ordered the cutting excavation of the safe locations of the vein, knowing full well the dangers of just blindly chopping our way in. Total yeild so far has been some 30 ore. An unprecedentedly good amount. PRAISE ARMOK, AND THE MINERS!

10th of Opal: This is bad. A bronze collossus has come to Swordsavior. Towering overhead, and made entirely of bronze, this magical construct is all but impervious. Our usual military strategy, of sitting behind our walls while our marksdwarves rain death from above will do nothing to this monstrosity. Nor will it drown, so using the FLOODER against it would be a pointless exercize in futility. I sound the general alarm and once everyone is inside, have the drawbridge closed. No point in making it easy for this thing. A quick querey of our militia shows that our melee squad has an unacceptable lack of steel weapons; only accounting for a handfull of the ones used. Armouring shows a similar lack of organization and my first priority after this crisis is resolved will be to ensure that all dwarves are equiped with the best possible weapons and armour. There is no excuse to be using bronze or iron when we have steel.

In any event, the bronze collossus made its way towards our gates only to stop and attack one of our poor hapless watch animals, in this case a white haired gibbon. After ripping the creature clean off its chain and throwing it OVER our moat and damn to land on the other side, the bronze collossus has started chasing it. And amazingly, it survived not only the throw, but is just barely faster than the BC, and a merry chase ensues.

12th of Opal: The bronze collossus had been chasing that poor monkey for almost 24 hours when another alarm is sounded, a sigeing force of broglins has arrived.

Spoiler

Show

They cannot know the doom that awaits them. As the bronze collossus is still busy playing monkey chase, I order the drawbridge lowered so as to tempt the goblins to try an make their way inside and to allow me to test fire WEAPON:FLOODER. This is the perfect opportunity. I dispatch a messenger dwarf to go downstairs to the holding chamber of the vampire and to yell at him through the wall to pull the lever. To my horror, the messenger returns minutes later, huffing and puffing from all of the stairs to tell me that the vampire insists that he is "on break". While the sacred tradition of being able to take a break at any time, for any reason for any length of time is a long and noble one, and one of the few weapons that the commoners wield against the harsh and unforgiving rule of the nobility of our culture, this is the worst possible time he could possibly have chosen, and I am flabbergasted at his refusal to take 5 steps and pull a simple lever. I go down to the depths myself and argue with him through the wall for almost an hour to no avail before I give up in disgust. We will handle the siege in the conventional manner that has served us in the past.

On my return to the surface, I find that the bronze collossus has given monkey pursuit a rest for the time being to murder an entire squad of trolls. Given trollish propensity for mayhem and their ability to tear down buildings and dwarves alike, I am equally elated and horrified to see the ease at which they are dispatched. On one hand, we don't have to deal with them now. On the other hand, the collossus is untouched after PULPING six of the beasts. Even once we break the siege, I see no way to defeat this foe.

Speaking of the siege, it is a simple enough matter. Our marksdwarves pincuishion the goblins in short order as well as their mounts, and even another whole squad appearing from the north doesn't do anything to save them. Ho. Hum. Yay. We win. How. Exciting. I realize even as I write this journal that I am pouting, but the project that I spent an entire year preparing for, and another entire year overseeing the construction of as missed the perfect opportunity to kill an entire siege in one torrent of water because of the lazyness of one stupid vampire.

In the meantime, having dispatched the trolls, the bronze collossus once again takes up monkey hunting to little avail. The creature is easily faster than it, and leads it on a ridiculous chase. The collosus circumnavigates our entire wall perimeter, killing our other watch animals along the way, but never does it manage to catch that one silly monkey. I am quite proud of that white haired gibbon. It has displayed an almost dwarven tenacity to stay alive, and while all it did was flee before an inevitable destruction, it was the only survivor of our watch animals, and managed to escape the bronze collossus when it decided to come inside. Knowing that there was no point in delaying the inevitable, I ordered our military assembled around the corner from the trap corridor, in the vain hope that the various traps would at least soften it up enough that one of our steel armed dwarves could kill the damnable thing.

And then to my suprise, the enormous monster is caught in a simple cage trap. Though it could easily bend the bars and escape, it just sits in there, our latest prisoner.



OOC: Okay, that was dumb. I thought megabeasts were trap-immune, but apparently not. We totally need to build an ARENA OF DEATH for that thing so that we can pit the bronze collossus against our various other prisoners for hilarity, fun, and blood for Armok. Next overseer, this is a job for you!

Also, because I expected to be able to fire FLOODER, I recorded a video of the siege in all of its hilarious stupidity. If you wish to watch 40 minutes of anticlimactic monkey chasing and broglin dieing, you can do so here:
http://www.twitch.tv/iyaerp/b/362150752

And because I can't leave well enough alone, before saving my progress, I copied our save folder and used DFHack to go back in time and see what happens if the stupid vampire wasn't on break. You can watch this alternate reality play out here: http://www.twitch.tv/iyaerp/b/362160544
Warning: maniacal laughter ensues.


The weapon gets fired at about the 25 minute mark. I blame it on the siege and X-split combining to bring my ingame FPS to 6. gah.

My turn is almost done, but before I go, I have some useful data gathered for future overseers about WEAPON:FLOODER, and how to use it effectively.

Levers: There are two levers that control our mighty megaweapon. The first is the FIRING LEVER. This one is down at the vampire's little lair, you can find him by pressing f6 to zoom there instantly. This lever will open the three main floodgates that let the water out to drown our enemies/wash them into the moat. In the main aboveground dining room, in the top left cornere is the PRESSURE CONTROL LEVER. This lever controls the floodgate that blocks the flow of water into the resivoir. If the floodgate is open, FLOODER WILL NOT FIRE CORRECTLY. This is due to the magic of how dwarven water physics of pressure works. If the water is under pressure, it won't flow, it just teleports, and doesn't drain out of the cistern at an appreciable rate. Don't question it, just accept it and move on. If the floodgate is closed, pump pressure is off, and gravity pressure will kick in. This will cause the entire top 3 zlevels of the cistern to empty almost instantly. THIS IS !!AWESOME!! and pretty much how the weapon is supposed to fire. Of importantance, once the weapon HAS fired and is ready to reload, it won't actually do so if this gate is closed. It needs to open back up to refill the firing cistern. DRAWBRIDGE CONTROL LEVER: This one you should already know because quite simply it opens and closes our drawbridge, but if the drawbridge is down/open, the fort will flood. If the drawbridge is up/closed, the water will just drain into the river. If you don't know where this lever is, it is the one in the little shack just south of the drawbridge itself. The one in the well room controls the gate on the north river if you feel the need to shut that for some reason.


Timing: Assuming idle dwarves in the dining hall and the vampire not being on break, ensure that the pressure gate is closed, and order the vampire to pull the firing lever when the enemy squad is about halfway across the bridge over the moat. This will ensure that they are right under the outflow when it opens and get washed into the moat, or into the river below our drawbridge. This is also an important thing to note. If the drawbridge is closed, the enemy won't come into range. Taunt them in by leaving it open until the last second. This lever should be ordered pulled about 10 seconds before you order the firing lever pulled. Positioning wise, your targets should be just reaching the E/W section of the moat bridge and making their way around the corner towards our gates.

Effectiveness: Nothing that can't breath water will survive. Cave crocadiles in this particular siege managed to make it out of the moat without drowning once the flood had subsided somewhat. but our Xbow dwarves were more than able to finish them off. Also, but bronze collossus. Completely immune. Nothing else we face on the surface should survive though.

okay. there is an atmospherics alarm going off where I work. I will finish this post later whe my life is no longer at risk
Edit: Well, the atmospherics alarm was a real one, but it was far enough away not to endanger me, so I don't have to evacuate after all. YAY! I feel like I am playing Space Station 13. Now I just need ****sec to show up and harmbaton me to death for being in the general vicinity of the alarm when it went off, and the experiance will be complete.

[Luzahn]

And this is why you never trust those bastard vampires with the levers.

It says something glorious about DF players that vampires are a resource, doesn't it?

And I could've sworn colossi were trap-immune. Wonder if someone messed up some RAWs. On that note, please give that gibbon a place of honor. He is a hero to dwarfkind.

[Grif]

And this is why you never trust those bastard vampires with the levers.

It says something glorious about DF players that vampires are a resource, doesn't it?

And I could've sworn colossi were trap-immune. Wonder if someone messed up some RAWs. On that note, please give that gibbon a place of honor. He is a hero to dwarfkind.

Well, colossi do dodge off traps, and I doubt that indicates they are trap immune.