Checkmate retires and learns how to draw better.

[Checkmate-Pony]

I have lived a life as best I could, but I now retire as a bitter old man from the play by post RPG forum; here on this forum.

This backstory is related to the things I draw, as most things I draw is related to characters and places in RPGs I GM or just play in. Inevitable everything I create is futile because despite all that work put into designing a character, games just die out after a few posts.

I can basically make a several page rant/angry hateful binge explaining why I'm here and not playing.

But I'd much rather entertain people than making them feel angry, and just maybe someone might find some joy in having a look, these next few pieces are dedicated to characters that weren't meant to be.

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The first one I want to show is one I made recently, but I'm not too sure about it, I feel like something is missing... But! I have a policy about these things, that even if I don't always like it completely doesn't mean I should not share it, someone might like it, if anything give feedback

Spoiler: The Picture

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[IMG][/IMG]

sorry for not having some kind of link, I'm no good at that.

So this is Sorensen Seraphim Amadeus Vandalla Vess titles titles...

He's a Rogue Trader from the warhammer 40k RPG game of the same name which I was always a big fan of, but me being an actual player was never meant to be it seems. As for the picture, it is clearly of a more symbolic nature, it shows the space captain himself standing over a world, I made it seem as if he was the source of light that rose over that world keeping with the theme of space exploration and to keep a single source of light split in two

The giant behind him is suppose to be him when wearing his Power Armor. I purposefully gave both characters the same sword as this would provide the clue that these were suppose to be one and the same, as well as keeping that center light piece that lights up the darkness of space. I feel like something is missing however.

[Checkmate-Pony]

finished this up

Spoiler: picture

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[IMG][/IMG]

This was suppose to be used for a game of Black Crusade, a renegade psyker, with this I tried instead of action, to convey a sense of deep controlled anger, a man of thoughts and the hidden power within, tried to illustrate this with the swirling filth by his legs, the hunched and hidden face and the foreboding presence of voices.

It was never used...

However I must address the elephant in the room with this one, the actual design is not of my invention. Because this is not at all a drawing of a black crusade psyker. It's actually a picture of Chico, an unused character from the game Metal Gear Solid V: the Phantom Pain that I found in the Discarded concept art for the game.

[Checkmate-Pony]

So this is (you guessed it!) another character that was never used because that's how things go for me, this time it was for D&D

Spoiler: picture

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[IMG][/IMG]

I have little to say about this one, I'm happy about the coat, however it could certainly be much better if I had another go at it.

But sometimes you gotta face up to the mistakes you made and show it as it is.

[Checkmate-Pony]

This next one is once again, just like the others, an unused character because all RPGs fail to last, at-least for me. Leading to my miserable existence.

Spoiler: picture

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[IMG][/IMG]

This one is another 40k one, it is a space wolf runepriest for Deathwatch rpg.


His name is Halvgrim Helgrimsen, known as the Blue Mountain. An ancient astarte lore master and story teller.

[Thanqol]

Hey dude, you're doing some really dynamic stuff, very cool!

Don't get too down on PBPing though - I still swear by it 14 years into my career of it. I also think that nothing shows the character of a man better than seeing how they perform in a PBP over the long term.

I've assembled a group of friends and excellent gamers and generally run very successful invite-only games that have lasted for years - and I think that if there's a trick to it, it's gaming with the right people. If you'd like I can add you to my list the next time a game's happening, if you have that rare sort of stamina and discipline to keep a game going over the long haul.

[Checkmate-Pony]

Hey dude, you're doing some really dynamic stuff, very cool!

Don't get too down on PBPing though - I still swear by it 14 years into my career of it. I also think that nothing shows the character of a man better than seeing how they perform in a PBP over the long term.

I've assembled a group of friends and excellent gamers and generally run very successful invite-only games that have lasted for years - and I think that if there's a trick to it, it's gaming with the right people. If you'd like I can add you to my list the next time a game's happening, if you have that rare sort of stamina and discipline to keep a game going over the long haul.

Spoiler: reply

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Alright, let's talk about the past. I am completely resentful to play by post on this forum. The reason is fiendishly simple.

I've been a GM for many years and run campaigns for years as well because of the right people. And had the rare opportunity to be an actual player once (because no one wants to GM but me) and it was one of the greatest times in my life.

But that was the golden age, that same group of friends have since sworn vengeance and death threats on one another for reasons out of my control and that's a long story in itself that is not important. The point is I've seen the good side.


Then I found this forum, and wanted to try play by post. And it's been nothing but misery ever since. I'm not even sure where to start.

The basic problem is all games die out almost instantly because people don't post or they just leave, but that's not always the case.

In a recent string of games I tried to join, I've been attacked both personally and in game. One game in particular after my very first post introducing the character. I was attacked and shot in the back by another player with an extremely lethal and explosive weapon (so there is no doubt he wanted the character dead).

The reason being was that my character Implied that he had killed people before (and This is in the game called Black Crusade! a game in which everyone plays villans, mutants, rebels and evil sorcerers in a grimdark future of only war. Having a character who was not a killer is an incredible exception) The irony being the pc who shot me was a mass murderer himself. And despite the GM saying that was really uncalled for, the player and his best friend would do everything in their power to make sure I had a miserable time, weather it was insults to my wife and person, or further hostility in character, grinding the game to a halt in hate speech directed at me, of which I will point out I did not hate speech back. Infact I'd beg them to explain to me why they were behaving this way to me, giving no answers. GM doing nothing to stop it.

I don't know how else to describe these things to you because they are so crazy and make as little sense describing as they did when I were there.

But that's just one of many dozens of examples, seen many cases of my character, and myself being attacked, to a point where I swore I'd talk as little as possible, and only say the bare minimum so that'd I'd not upset anyone ever again. To this day I never speak in OOC unless it is absolutely necessary out of utter fear this till happen, which is sad.

But even with this new passive mentality it still happens, I've received a ban strike because I mentioned the existence of other websites besides this one, and many times been threatened or just scolded for not doing paperwork perfectly or if I would ask for help (yes, asking for help is an offense to some). Been threatened with ban and exile because I wanted to add people to skype so we could be friends. (people don't like skype on this forum It seems...)

Seen players break down in furious anger, rage quitting games for slights that apparently are my fault, however they are incapable of explaining how I wronged them.

I've Pleaded people who'd do this to explain to me how I wronged them so that it may never happen again, but it never works, it just ends in more hate speech from them.

I'm very analytical about everything I do, I've studied psychology, and I cannot for the life of me understand this forum and the people in it, the way they think, I've even had friends look over the recorded logs so they could see it for themselves because I had to know I was not crazy, and they don't get it either.

In despair and anger I left for a time, I have returned recently to try and play games again. I even set up a game in which I was a GM.

This time no one have been hostile to me, but it has ended the same way where people quit, fall silent or generally become unresponsive. in the game I GMed myself, I'd post regularly and do my thing, but despite the amazing and eager people I had as players, they just shut down and become utterly passive.

I'd urge them to talk, to at least tell me if there was something wrong so that I could know and be their greatest host. But there was no real reply or reaction in game despite my best efforts to make it as engaging as possible (and I know I'm a good GM, I have fans in real life for crying out loud)

Eventually I made a post saying I'm fed up with their behavior and I'm done GMing for corpses.

As soon as I did that... One of the players made a post essentially saying that he knew I was a failure right from the start and this game would never amount to anything because of me anyway. Just wow... I did not reply back to such bait ofcourse.

I can basically go on forever like this, and I kinda have already and I'm sorry about that. But I live in this eternal limbo on this forum where nothing goes as it should and no one behaves like human beings. I' feel like some kind of monster and thus fled here to a place where I might enjoy myself drawing, and perhaps others would too.

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As for your offer, I'd wish for nothing more than a chance to be an actual player and partake in story telling which is my thing in life. But you need to know my story, and how I have no good answers for these mysteries.

I've had some bad days is what I'm saying. And playing with the right people... well I guess for years now I've played with all the wrong people it seems. I guess there is nothing more to it than that.

No one can hate a person they know so little; so much.

I'd be honored to play, and I feel and know I have the discipline and stamina. But I cannot prove it to you, as I've not had any luck with Play by Post as mentioned above. You have only my word. And I hope my story did not make you too scared of me

[Thanqol]

It sounds like you're carrying a lot of anger, confusion and bitterness with you. I think in moments like this it's important to take the time to work through those feelings because otherwise they'll stay with you and come to inform your entire personality. The world is, by its very nature, a fallible place - the world by its nature will let you down in ways you'll never be able to understand for reasons that defy logic or explanation. The only thing in the universe that ever can truly be perfect is your relationship with yourself. Try reading Emerson's Self Reliance, that's a life changing text.

I'll keep your name in mind for the next time I do a recruitment thread My entire life revolves around PBPs and I have very developed strategies for making sure they hold together. In the meantime I look forwards to more art.

[Checkmate-Pony]

It sounds like you're carrying a lot of anger, confusion and bitterness with you. I think in moments like this it's important to take the time to work through those feelings because otherwise they'll stay with you and come to inform your entire personality. The world is, by its very nature, a fallible place - the world by its nature will let you down in ways you'll never be able to understand for reasons that defy logic or explanation. The only thing in the universe that ever can truly be perfect is your relationship with yourself. Try reading Emerson's Self Reliance, that's a life changing text.

I'll keep your name in mind for the next time I do a recruitment thread My entire life revolves around PBPs and I have very developed strategies for making sure they hold together. In the meantime I look forwards to more art.

It's not about relationship with myself or self reliance, this website it not my life, it's just a website, it simply has to do with this forum and it's players having some nasty habits and very toxic players and I've seen the worst part of it all in one foul binge.

But I had to tell you the place I come from on this matter of pbp, our past experiences is what make us, and I've seen only the worst on this specific topic, I didn't tell you because I needed to unload personal baggage, that was not the point.

[Checkmate-Pony]

This next one is kinda old, but still good.

It's another 40k one and it's also, once again, a character whom I never got to use because campaigns don't last (This one barely existed for more than a thread page before another PC lost control of his daemon possessed soul and tried to kill me, I escaped death by a miracle)

Spoiler: Picture

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[IMG][/IMG]

His name is Nod, a renegade space marine, it's a very blury style on this one, I wanted to try something different, hazy and filled with motion.

[Das_Tabby]

I wanted to thank you for your art of Shirosk, i really like what you did there.
I really love your use of color, with just some details actually colored which makes them stand out (I know what that style is called in german, but I'm not familiar with an english translation... "quality contrast" doesn't sound right ^^")
I always imagined his face a bit "softer", but I think your portrayal actually suits him better, and I got now a much clearer picture of my own charakter
(the only thing that doesn't suit him is the sword, because he fights unarmed, but I forgot to mention that in his description, so nevermind ^^")
Keep it up!

[Checkmate-Pony]

I wanted to thank you for your art of Shirosk, i really like what you did there.
I really love your use of color, with just some details actually colored which makes them stand out (I know what that style is called in german, but I'm not familiar with an english translation... "quality contrast" doesn't sound right ^^")
I always imagined his face a bit "softer", but I think your portrayal actually suits him better, and I got now a much clearer picture of my own charakter
(the only thing that doesn't suit him is the sword, because he fights unarmed, but I forgot to mention that in his description, so nevermind ^^")
Keep it up!

Spoiler: picture

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[IMG][/IMG]

I'm glad you received it. I know you didn't ask for a sword but I felt it created a sense of nobility to the character, combined with van dike and Dr Strange and Necromancy I saw this villainous nobleman in my minds eye.

It is a common thing that happens when someone draws for someone else, there often comes situations where the client has a hard time putting words to what they want. Or sometimes give information that is useless to the artist (not in your case however, the simplicity of your request was why I wanted to do it)

What the style is called... I have no idea, I just do what I feel looks good.

[Checkmate-Pony]

so since people talk about miniatures now, Why not, post pictures about just that. I'm working on that stuff right now.

So this one requires some explanation.

I'm working on a Chaos Renegade Militia Army

They are Rebels and villains, scum and the disenfranchised


And I have a big collection, so I flipped my boxes upside down and found a ton of models from different places and companies and decided to mash them together under the same color scheme.

[IMG][/IMG]



This is a very clumpsy picture, and none of the models are singled out but that's the point

This is a mob of scum and rebels. It's suppose to be a random mess of awful, crazy gun wielding extremists.

When on the table they will seem random and pathetic next to the intimidating space marines and tanks and that's exactly the point.


As for the bases, it's not done. This is very experimental.

[Thanqol]

Are those ringwraiths? They make fantastic cultist types.

[Checkmate-Pony]

Are those ringwraiths? They make fantastic cultist types.

yep those are nazguls, but when painted diffirent and put next to all the others they just look like crazy sand cultists in rags which is perfect.

The Next batch has a lot of lord of the rings in them. But with diffirent colors and surrounded by the right people the meaning changes.

[Checkmate-Pony]

[IMG][/IMG]

The Mob Grows, it's a fun experiment this one, I' really just made all these from extra bits and things left over. Bases still not done, have not figured out what to use.

[Artman77]

They are all individuals/unique which is REALLY appealing to me, as a fellow artist, when compared to the standard 'stock' armies that you often get. The color scheme works really well to tie it all together, like you said, but each guy still stood out. I wanted to say "I really like this guy" but then kept adding one more guy to comment on until I named them all, lol. Great work on the details, the red masks especially. Helmets, buttons, and snaps all stand out, but not too much. Well done.

You gotta change or get rid of that ork though... he sticks out like a sore thumb.

[Artman77]

P.S.: Did I say good job on the color scheme? Good job on the color scheme. They really look like they all could have come from the same game.

[Checkmate-Pony]

They are all individuals/unique which is REALLY appealing to me, as a fellow artist, when compared to the standard 'stock' armies that you often get. The color scheme works really well to tie it all together, like you said, but each guy still stood out. I wanted to say "I really like this guy" but then kept adding one more guy to comment on until I named them all, lol. Great work on the details, the red masks especially. Helmets, buttons, and snaps all stand out, but not too much. Well done.

You gotta change or get rid of that ork though... he sticks out like a sore thumb.

It makes me very happy that you notice all the aspects I considered when making them.

I'm still working on this project, and I've acquired a lot more models to really turn the dial up on this one

The whole idea of making them all unique I want to take to a new height

i've purchased some Cadians, renegade militia, genestealer cult neophytes and some Skitarii Rangers

I plan on combining all these kits and form what I call "the technobarbarian horde" (want me to post more?)

It is a renegade army and the idea is for it to contain mobs of scum and villainy, any man or woman willing to fight, an angry mob, utterly expendable, with sandy tan like colours and worn vehicles.

I wanted to make a Good bad guy army.... One that is fun to fight, so that my opponent playing the good guys such as space marines (because they are very popular) will feel awesome, and that he will feel like he's doing the right thing.


As for the Ork, yes afterwards I could also tell he does not belong, but it's so much fun to paint orks I had to do it, I kinda made him as a joke since the model itself is ancient and classic.

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I often juggle between time spend drawing and time spend with miniatures.
It always makes me a bit sad, I get no real reward from drawing, feedback or 'play' from pictures. Most people just don't understand how much thought is put into designing a character not to mention the picture composition, conveying a story through a pose or a look.

I love making up characters more than anything, even if not from my own IP.

However with miniatures there is no doubt in peoples minds the hardship that goes into making them once they can physically see them infront of them. The Awe and talk my armies have started is a priceless feeling, and it saddens me I cannot feel that for pictures.

Even here, people don't really say anything, I can only look at the amount of views this thread gets, and that's the only estimation I get.

But with models I can see it in real life, how much people care, that fascination of seeing something artistic, it obsesses me, even now.

[Artman77]

I'm with you bro. When I was in high school I used to design characters with gear, armor, weapons, and everything... and this is before I even knew about D&D.

Then I crafted several characters for games that never lasted for more than one session. Then I started DMing and I would always create a million NPCs, fully fleshed out and unique, that would only speak to the PCS one time and then be forgotten. No appreciation.

...And even when I write for fun/myself, I enjoy crafting characters with full gear and fleshed-out backgrounds. It's fun, what can I say.

[Checkmate-Pony]

I'm with you bro. When I was in high school I used to design characters with gear, armor, weapons, and everything... and this is before I even knew about D&D.

Then I crafted several characters for games that never lasted for more than one session. Then I started DMing and I would always create a million NPCs, fully fleshed out and unique, that would only speak to the PCS one time and then be forgotten. No appreciation.

...And even when I write for fun/myself, I enjoy crafting characters with full gear and fleshed-out backgrounds. It's fun, what can I say.

oh you have no idea, I'd do the exact same things then and now, drawing in school was awesome because your friends will want to see them and laugh or be intrigued. Writing as well.

I also Love being a Game Master and make tons of NPCs, fully developed (and generally not interested in handing the players everything they want, because normal people don't do that) and I've tried on this forum but no... just no, it will never happen, this place is cursed when it comes to that.

I find that when you are a game master, and you want to show the world you've created, you can't awe the players with visuals because it's not a movie, and describing landscapes does not go very far. But NPCs provide us with the best spectical for this. Showing us what kind of people live in this environment and how culture has shapen their way of life.

It comes to a sort of funny problem where I have trouble making an actual PC, when I'm a player. Making NPCs is a diffirent process entirely than one that you have to play with, and so I've become much better at making NPCs than PCs because I never ever get to play in a game.
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I always look at the D&D classes and races and get so mad

Because I want more, I want other races, I want my own races, not the ones Tolkien invented. (making up races is one of my favorite things)

And the fact that alignment and class so firmly narrows you down to a trope

I know that it need not be so, but it' still heavily influences character creation in D&D. despite the fact that I don't like D&D that much, I wish I could at-least try and play it... No such luck.

[Checkmate-Pony]

[IMG][/IMG]


All my parts arrived, and we get started. Need a little more green stuff, but here is the first 3 Sci Fi Villans that will make up the mob of scum and villainy.