[Nexus] Outside XXXVI

[happyturtle]

TARDIS

Spoiler

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TARDIS

Felandria gets to her feet, having shifted back to her normal form.

She looks sheepishly towards Butler and Decker.

Before you say anything...

I was just doing my job, which I've only had for like, an hour.

I just wanted to keep Butler safe.

All you had to do is say you were together.

Then he started shooting up the joint and I.....

I'm sorry.

TARDIS

"I did say she was my wife ma'am." That Butler did! Early on too even. But it was so far gone from him at that point, I don't think anyone was even listening.

"I forgive you ma'am." Just so long as she doesn't start throwing loud thunder around and becoming big and scary again.

Decker does not offer any words of forgiveness, not being the forgiving type. "Hold on! He's got a mind of his own!" she bellows, as the TARDIS lurches around. Grabbing hold of something might be advised.

[A Perfect Place to Paint a Landscape]

That verdant hill. That time-worn boulder. That perfect little stream bubbling past. That pristine alder tree with its branches swaying in the breeze.

Yes indeed.

This would be a perfect place to paint a landscape.

Too bad some giffs found out about it and have decided to steal the inspiration so a work of art not yet painted can't be finished unless a ransom is paid to restore the timeline to its proper order!

Those dastardly space hippos.

There comes a high pitch whinging sound as a strange metal craft shaped vaguely like an old fashioned bath tub touches down in the field, landing gear and gangplank unfolding out of its otherwise featureless surfaces.

Then the space hippos disembark.

Humanoid hippos about the size of an ogre, each armed with a nasty looking ray gun that very clearly has a business end you don't want to be on. Hard to mistake it for anything else with all those mean looking hooks.

"Secure the area!" their leader bellows. Clearly the leader since he has the largest hat. "Spread out. We don't want any unwelcome visitors while we're doing our work."

The other giffs grunt in acknowledgement and trundle off to various parts of the landscape. Alone. Where it is hard to see each other. Almost as if they want some kind of protector of the time line to show up and stop them.

But eventually, the TARDIS lands, conveniently out of sight of the Giff ship or the individual giffs. At the last minute, Decker loses her grip and goes rolling off and crashes into the bowels of the TARDIS.

"I'm alright."

[Rebonack]

[Meadow Crash Site]

The device that roared with thunder and struck men down with death. Obviously a weapon. What kind of weapon, and by what devilry it functions, Gad doesn't know. But he does know that having it pointed at his face is bad.

He quickly hands over a coin pouch filled with his meager wealth.

Mostly because he doesn't want to be thundered at.

Gad likes being alive. It's a really common trait among most people.

And thus the last bandit that was hanging around coughs up some loot!

Now what?

[Earl of Purple]

Meadow Crash Site

"Hay, where's your camp? We could get more booty that way. Don't worry; we're pirates. We work through intimidation; we don't want to hurt anypony, it's just that everypony often wants to hurt us, so we have to defend ourselves." That's true; pirates didn't want to fight because fighting is dangerous and risky. The Jolly Rodger let merchants know they were dealing with pirates and not privateers, who were bound by rules and codes with regards to captured crew- pirates weren't, so by surrendering quickly they stopped the pirates from getting angry and slaughtering their crew.

[Rebonack]

[A Perfect Place to Paint a Landscape]

And thus the TARDIS lands with its usual weird wooshing noises.

Thankfully none of the giffs have noticed it yet. If they had then they probably would have been surrounding it with their blasters set to frappe.

[Meadow Crash Site]

Gad shakes his head. "We had only just arrived before we saw your battle in the sky. If Hadad order for a camp to be pitched it was after we failed to ambush you. I do not know where it would be."

Aaww...

That's too bad.

Hopefully that answer doesn't get his legs broken.

Gad likes having non-broken legs.

He's about to say something further about his desire not to have his legs broken when suddenly a nearby rock begins doing something really really weird.

A line of livid emerald fire begins burning its way around the face of the rock, slowly creating a ring roughly five feet across. Weird.

"Devilry..." the poor man mumbles, his eyes wide.

[Earl of Purple]

Meadow- Sunken Sky-Sloop

When she sees the flash, Captain Volley Shot has all four pistols out and aimed at the rock as her telekinesis grabs her pegleg and hastily buckles it up. Walking is more important than protection, so her coat isn't put on as it would take too long.

Cinnamon Stick changes her grip on her stick so she's wielding it properly and not holding it where she can slowly clean it from blood and brains.

Doc Sorebones draws his cutlass and holds it awkwardly in his mouth. He's really not a warrior; he's never had formal training.

Gad may want to take advantage of the fact that the three ponies are paying no attention to him to run, or try to attack. There's a lot of cutlasses and broken wood suitable for a club lying around.

[Rebonack]

[Meadow Crash Site]

Distracted demon horses!

Time to flee!

Gad quickly scrambles to his feet and begins running away toward the nearest hill as fast as he legs can carry him. He's hoping that a whole bunch of rocks and dirt will protect him from the demon's thunder club. Honestly he has no idea, but it's better than nothing!

Meanwhile!

Once the ring is completed the area inside it turns dead black. A portal of some kind?

This is confirmed when a unicorn with a coat the color of swiss cheese and a candy red mane is suddenly flung through with rather notable force. Enough force carve a comedic furrow into the sod with her face. She's wearing a utility harness and a pair of saddle bags with some sort of rather large snub-nosed gun clipped to the harness. Even at a glance it's obvious that the weapon's tech level is head and withers above a flintlock pistol.

The unicorn makes a sputtering noise on account of the grass in her nose, groans a bit, and then decides that just laying in the dirt is her best course of action.

Behind her the portal continues to flicker and flash like the ring of faerie fire it is.

[Earl of Purple]

Sunken Sky-Sloop

"Doc, Cinnamon, grab her and let's get away. The ship's on fire, and the magazine could blow any second. I'm surprised we're still safe. Treat her gently; I have no idea what she's gone through, but it looks like it might have been a bit more than a ship crash. I'll bring up the rear, keep an eye on that hole. Don't look back unless you hear gunshots; I'll catch up." The other two ponies quickly jump to do the Cap'n's will, and gently pick the unicorn up and drape her over Cinnamon's back as the doctor looks her over for injuries. Cinnamon is not as gentle as she should be with an injured pony.

The captain will awkwardly trot after her crew, keeping all four pistols trained on the portal, waiting for something threatening to pop through. She knows the man has run away, but doesn't care.

[Rebonack]

[Meadow Crash Site]

Looks like the time has come to flee the meadow crash site before it becomes the meadow giant explosion and crater site.

The portal continues to burn, but as the mare is pulled away from it the inky blot in the middle fades and the ring of flames begin to die down. As for the mare herself she doesn't appear to be injured beyond a few knicks and scrapes, but the scent of stress and explosives is pretty heavy on her.

Attached to her harness on the front there's a little patch attached by Velcro. A several circles, a cloud, a lightning bolt, and a pair of wings, all in purple black and green. An insignia of some kind? The letters M O A are featured prominently at the top.

"Mission's fubar..." the mare mutters groggily. "Had to ring out... emergency evac. Where's the rest... the rest of my team?"

Her eyes aren't even open and her head is lolling limply as she's dragged along. Whatever she was doing has left her drained and disoriented.

[Earl of Purple]

Meadows- Fleeing The Sunken Sky-Sloop

I just realised that everypony was hanging around a ship I'd stated to be on fire and also stated to have cannons aboard. That is a monumentally bad idea and is likely to summon a certain skeleton featured prominently in Irregular Webcomic!.

The Awesome Operative won't receive an answer until the doctor and the chef are convinced they're far enough away from the wreck that should it explode they'd be OK from most of the flying debris. The captain's fallen quite far behind; running on three legs and a pole is very difficult. "Dunno about yer team, miss, but you're safe now. You're lucky you popped out when you did; our ship's likely to blow soon, an' we nearly weren't there to drag you away. Set 'er down, Cinnamon." The voice is male, middle-aged, and kind, if a bit rough. Cinnamon is a bit rough in setting the unicorn down, but does as she's asked and goes back to help her captain. Incidentally, Volley did grab her coat. No way she's leaving that to be exploded.

[Rebonack]

[Meadow of Safe Distance]

The unicorn makes a slight 'uuf' upon being set down. She tries to rise shakily to her hooves, only to collapse again.

"Uugh... Feels like somepony is driving a chisel into my skull..." she grumbles, rubbing her head with her hoof. "Bucking Stripes must have hit us with a void charge. Damn it. I-"

Wait.

Ship exploding?

Her eyes snap open, a bright green the same color as her magic. Pretty common trait among unicorns. "Ship is down? We lost our transport? Where-"

And now she finally focuses on Doc. And in that moment her body language changes completely.

"You aren't Em-oh-ay. Who the hell are you? Where did that bucked up ring dump me?"

She looks around again and again fails to stand up. "And where the hell is the rest of my team!?"

[Earl of Purple]

Meadow of Safe Distance

"Nope! I'm Doctor Sorebones, that's the ship's chef, and I guess quartermaster since the last ate a cannonball, Cinnamon Stick, helping Cap'n Volley Shot. Over there, you'll see our ship, The Element of Betrayal. Don't worry, we, uh, captured her from pirates and hadn't gotten around to changing the name yet?" Sorebones is a terrible liar. By which I mean, he can't lie to save his life, not that he lies compulsively and nopony knows what's true and what isn't.

The captain, meanwhile is carefully trotting over, shrugging off Cinnamon's help so she can stump along closer to the other unicorn. Cinnamon is staying a distance away, pulling a pewter tankard and a bottle of medicinal alcohol from her saddlebags and pouring some into the tankard.

The ship is also quite clearly not what the mystery unicorn is expecting- it's wood, on fire, and has a large canvas bag. Plus, it's surrounded by dead ponies.

[Rebonack]

[Meadow of Safe Distance]

Yeeeaah...

That isn't a modern Equestrian military airship. That isn't even a modern Equestrian civilian airship. It looks like pre-war tech. And not even particularly good pre-war tech.

"Uh huh," is the reply to the comment regarding pirates. Possibly pirates working outside the domain of the Royal Air-force? The Crown was aware of pirates harassing the Zebras and their allies. They weren't exactly encouraged, but nopony felt compelled to stop them either.

Of course this puts Allomyrina in an awkward position since not only is she military she's military that doesn't officially exist. She has already blathered too much about her mission in her daze.

And that means it is time to bluff!

"This doesn't look like anywhere in northern Roam. Where did my teleport dump me?"

[Earl of Purple]

Meadow of Safe Distance

"Roam? That's zebra lands, isn't it? We were harassing the Canterlot-Crystal Empire trade lanes when we were sunk by pirate-hunters. After the crash, we got attacked by these ugly, ungainly biped things, like minotaurs but bald apart from a mane, no tail, no horns, and all the same colour. They had bronze swords, and the one we captured said he- or maybe she, now I think about it- was a 'man' from a place called Sandree. Called us 'demons'. They ran away when your portal appeared, after he made a generous donation to our airship replacement fund." The captain isn't hiding her chosen profession. She's also openly wearing four flintlock pistols and a tricorn hat, though her coat is lying nearby as she hasn't put it back on yet so the other unicorn can see her scars, brand, and pegleg.

[Rebonack]

[Meadow of Safe Distance]

Allomyrina opens her mouth.

Then closes it again.

Pirates attacking the trade routes Equestria and where? That doesn't sound like nation, let alone empire, she knows of. And mans? What's a man? And then some nonsense country that doesn't exist. This is very rapidly becoming weirder and weirder.

Alright.

Pause and think for a moment, Allo. What do you know? The mission went south and everypony bailed. You tried to ring out and got caught in a void charge. That must have thrown off the destination of the faerie ring. But where the hell IS this destination? If what the dirty pirate says is true you're somewhere between Equestria and 'The Crystal Empire', whatever the hell that is.

So.

Unknown bipedal race called 'mans' that thinks ponies are demons. The Crystal Empire. And somewhere called Sandree. All completely blank on those.

"Right. I don't suppose you have any idea where the nearest Ministry of Awesome hub is?"

[Lex-Kat]

Melody's Island

"Don't step on any jellyfish?" Rein asks, as he dances carefully, concentrating on staying in time with Melody. It is much easier this way, admittedly.

Melody smiles at that. I'll do my best. SO, do you think you're getting the feel of it? DanceDanceDance.

[Melody's Island- Mermaid Cove]

So they crash down into the water. Derek does his best to catch her as they fall so she lands ontop of him. The waves wash up around his face not quite threating to go into his mouth or nose. He is grinning at her. "You are never going to learn to swim if you run away from the ocean."

Jezebelle clings to him tightly. It's jost so COLD. she puts extra emphasis on "cold". She shivers as another wave crashes against them.

[Earl of Purple]

Meadow of Safe Distance

The unicorn captain pulls a map out of her saddlebag and unfolds it in the air in front of her before setting it down between the unicorns, drawing her pistols to weigh down the corners. "Can't say I have heard of the Ministry of Awesome. I think we're off this map- can't say I've heard of Sandree before, and I've sailed the seven skies of Equestria. But we were roughly here when we got caught by Princess Cadance's ships." She jabs her flesh front hoof at a place in the north of Equestria, using the map you altered to get the FO:E one.

Meanwhile, Cinnamon Stick has whacked the back of her head very hard, caught her yellow glass eye, and has placed it in the tankard whilst Doc Sorebones examines her socket for signs of infection or further injury. Allomyrina might note that all three ponies are disabled- Captain Volley Shot is missing her left leg above the knee and wears a crude wooden replacement, Cinnamon Stick has had her right eye removed, and her replacement doesn't match the original colour of her eyes, and Doc Sorebones can't fly because he's missing half his left wing.

[Rebonack]

[Meadow of Safe Distance]

And thus the MoA operative is shown a map that appears almost completely unknown to her!

She recognizes the names of the major cities from the Duchy of Canterlot. But nothing is in the right place and the rest of the whole country is missing. Almost as if somepony had made a foalishly simplified version of Equestria for children to understand.

*cough*

And apparently Princess Mi Amore Cadenza is in charge of this Crystal Empire place?

"Ah, right. Of course," Allomyrina replies, trying her best not to sound confused. She looks over the pirates and begins weighing her chances traveling with them versus how well she might do striking off on her own out into the middle of wherever the hell she landed.

[Earl of Purple]

Meadows of Safe Distance

"The Crystal Empire and Roam aren't marked on this map, but I'm assuming Roam is to the south? That's where the zebras come from, I think. But the Crystal Empire is up here, to the north." She taps the ground just above the map, above the Crystal Mountains. "We heard from the man that there's a road nearby, and we're planning on following that because, as the man said, there's probably a city at the end. And a city has sky-docks. Actually, most towns have sky-docks nowadays; even with piracy, air travel is still the fastest way of getting things from a to b. Apart from the trains, and they're expensive because they can't escape a pirate ship in the same way a sky-ship can. Holding up the Friendship Express is always a good way to make a quick bit. You're welcome to travel with us; we know how to look after ourselves, even if your firearm is very strange. Is it one of those new-fangled rifles? I hear they're more accurate than a musket over a similar distance, but I've never had the pleasure of seeing one." Her pistols are all smoothbore weapons.

It's the only map I know of! Except for a fan-made one that is really big and confusing and doesn't fit with the one produced by Hasbro.

[Felandria]

TARDIS



Decker does not offer any words of forgiveness, not being the forgiving type. "Hold on! He's got a mind of his own!" she bellows, as the TARDIS lurches around. Grabbing hold of something might be advised.

Felandria grabs onto the nearest sturdy object and hangs on.

But eventually, the TARDIS lands, conveniently out of sight of the Giff ship or the individual giffs. At the last minute, Decker loses her grip and goes rolling off and crashes into the bowels of the TARDIS.

"I'm alright."

Felandria rushes over and helps Decker to her feet.

Once again, I apologize for everything that happened back there.

It's just, everything was getting out of control and I didn't know what else to do, I just wanted everyone to calm down and discuss things rationally.

[Rebonack]

[Meadow of Safe Distance]

It has to be kept in mind that the Cosmos is quite bit. Not too much of a surprise that people might hail from different versions of the same world that have some pretty noticeable divergences.

Suffice to say Allomyrina's home has a very different looking map.

The operative just nods absently, still lost in her own thoughts and plans as the captain begins rattling off what she and the other pirates are going to do. Though at the mention of weapons her ears perk up.

Muskets? Geeze, that's some old tech.

She purses her lips a bit at the question regarding her GMG 1400 Stampede semi-automatic grenade launcher and decides that it would be wise not to say to much about it aside from, "It isn't a rifle."

Well.

It isn't.

"Element of Betrayal. If I travel with you what's to say you aren't just going to shoot me in the back?"

Seems like a reasonable question.

[Earl of Purple]

Meadow of Safe Distance

"Because we're pirates. We work on intimidation to avoid fights, and on giving no mercy when fighting is inevitable. The Element of Betrayal was chosen because the Elements of Harmony are the cornerstones of Equestrian society- at least, our Equestrian society. If you travel with us, we'll consider you part of the crew. And if I betray you through actions or orders, my crew will wonder when I'll betray them and mutiny, electing a new captain. You'll also be entitled to a full share of any booty we capture during our travels. Just so you're aware, the captain and quartermaster- that's Cinnamon Stick- get two shares, as does the most valorous pony in battle, and the doctor gets one and a half. Why? Because it's the captain's job to lead the crew into battle, the quartermaster's job to keep the crew fed, the doctor's job to keep the crew healthy. Injuries are compensated- half a share for a leg or eye, a full share for a wing or horn, two full shares and standard compensation if you're unable to continue as crew." Pirate ships were democracies, and they did institute compensation for injuries. Maybe not normally quite so generous as Volley Shot's, but still.

[Rebonack]

[Meadow of Safe Distance]

The unicorn gives out a long, slow breath through her nose. She has this nasty creeping feeling in her gut that this place isn't home. All the details seem wrong. There's no way anypony would be unaware of the MoA. It just isn't possible.

Which all begs the question, where is she?

"I am Allomyrina, an operative of the Ministry of Awesome's deep espionage team. From a glance at your map and your own descriptions it sounds like the Equestria as you know it is quite different from the great nation I serve. I'm not going to pretend I understand how my ring dumped me here, but I'll have to make the best of it. Which means traveling with you for the time being."

Her horn lights up and she draws a side-arm from her saddlebags, the weapon's muzzle pointing away from the Captain as she levitates it toward her. It's a fairly standard Equestrian-make semi-automatic pistol designed to be held in and fired from the mouth. Of course holding it in a TK field works too.

"I don't have any interest in booty or thievery or even being part of your crew. I just need to find somewhere civilized so I can get my bearings and hopefully find somepony who can tell me what the hell is going on. Consider the gun a show of good faith. Once we're ready to part ways I'll show you how to clean, repair, and reload it."

A nice little incentive to keep her alive.

[Earl of Purple]

Meadow of Safe Distance

"I can already see how to reload it. That's my special talent- reloading pistols. I've never had a flash in the pan. It's why I carry four- two to fire, two to load, then repeat. If you're hurt, Doc will help. He's fully trained from the Canterlot School of Surgery." Captain Volley Shot isn't lying about knowing how to reload the pistol, and aiming and firing it isn't too different from her favourite flintlocks. Regardless, Volley will take the pistol and hover it next to her, placing it in her saddlebag. Her flintlock pistols are returned to their holsters as the map is folded back up and also replaced in her saddlebag. She then unbuckles her leg so she can put her greatcoat on, the inner chainmail clinking slightly. When it's secure, she straps her leg back on.

Her crew have seen their captain prepare to move and Cinnamon Stick picks up her tankard of medicinal alcohol and drains it before rolling her glass eye out onto her hoof and popping it back into her right eyesocket, moving her eyes around and blinking to ensure it's in properly. Doc Sorebones adjusts his cutlass; he's still not used to wearing one.

[Rebonack]

[Meadow of Safe Distance]

The unicorn gives only a grunt of acknowledgement.

Allomyrina (what a weird name for a pony!) unclips her Stampede and fusses over the weapon while the others are getting ready. She doesn't want the thing to misfire or jam in the middle of a potential firefight after all. If the other ponies had been attacked here by whatever strange creatures are lurking around then there's no telling whether or not they'll be assaulted again.

Best be prepared.

Direct combat really isn't Allo's favored course of action. But if push comes to shove she'll do what she has to in order to survive.

"I'm ready."

[Lost_Deep]

[Quality Soil LTD]

"Wait what? No, just the ointment." she said after Susan in a bit of a defensive tone. She didn't sound like she wanted the whole regeneration thing if it was for what she thought it would be applied towards.

In any case, she thought about taking the time that Susan was away to find a place to sit but just decided on the lazy route. Taking a single, momentary breath, she exhaled a blast of frigid cold and ice at the ground while shaping how it collected and grew until a rather tall-backed chair of nearly transparent frost had taken shape. It was showing off a bit but no reason to not be comfortable if one could be, right?

In any case, Neni's Chasis would be given some note as the Teifling sat down. "Hello there!" she called. "So, could I prize some information about this area from you?" she asked. It seemed like the first thing that needed to be done, at least. Or one of the first things.

Neni will project her hologram again. "Unfortunately, I am new here as well. I know very little of the surrounding area, the population centers, the culture, the local technological or magical level, or anything. While I likely know more than you, it might be largely because I have experience with situations similar to this one, while you seem to have minimal experience with it. Do you have any specific questions?"

[The Bushranger]

[Blocks and Blocks of High Quality Dirt]

Susan, meanwhile, rummages in the medical cabinets of the ship, having been slightly surprised by the refusal of treatement for their new passenger's missing arm, and trying to find the ointment she knows she has.

It'll be another post or two before she returns!

[Hattish Thing]

Mining Station

Sorry, not been feeling well.

So, Enshadu begins his journey to the Magcave, and The Grandfather follows the men who asked him too.

(I shall make a detailed post once they arrive at the Magcave, then I'll probably be feeling better, too.)

[Terumitsu]

[Simply: The Ground]

Casually resting her arm on that of the ice throne and her head upon that, the teifling shifted her legs into a more comfortable position and asked: "Well, lets start broad, then. What was all of that you said about how the world worked before?

And once you're done with that, just how does this flying thing work?

And to round it all out, Just where are you and her from and how did you get here?"

That seemed enough to start with. She would be receptive to any questions Neni might have although she wasn't sure how to convey that to the 'thinking golem' as she was unsure how much body language was taken into account.

Another odd thing in the string of odd things that seemed to be making a necklace of odd pearls at this point was that she had yet to open her eyes dispite her apparent ease with detecting where things were. She didn't seem to have any nuances that implied blindness but even then it was possibly a little unsettling in a way.

[Reinholdt]

TARDIS - Perfect Landscape

Butler doesn't know what object is sturdy enough to grab, so chooses to hold on to Decker. This doesn't work out quite so well, but at least he's in a position to help and check on Decker immediately.

"What happened ma'am? Did we crash ma'am? Can T's crash ma'am?"

Also, Vasilisa is up in the Repository.

Melody's Island

"I think so..." Reinholdt says. He's far more dextrous than I, so probably doesn't have too hard a time learning besides the usual curve anyone has.

[GrandDM]

The same guy that shouted earlier replies. "I told you we don't know nothing." He then walks away. The other onlookers go away, in fear and some a bit angry, to their homes or to go about their business. If Shadow looks around he'll see that the town has a number of houses, a Saloon, a Bank and what seems to be the Jail where the sheriff's office is. There is no visible entrance to the underground mine in the vicinity.

Shadow will concentrate on the location signatures of his teammates. He will move until he is right above them, then relax his concentration, return to his normal insubstantiality, and phase through the ground until he reaches them.

Assuming there are no wards.