LGBTAIitp # 49: Please check all baggage before boarding the Rainbow Rail Road

[Kesnit]

Spoiler: WBC

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Without getting into anything that will violate forum rules, I will say this.

I will not celebrate his death, for to do so would be continuing the thing that he spouted, hate. I will simply say that I am glad there is less hate in this world and I hope we can fill the hole that this hate left with love. And I sincerely hope that Phelps finds the peace in death that he so desperately needed in life. And I can only hope that his followers will somehow, through their giant cloud of hate, see that hate is not the way to live. Love you all and hope you are doing well.

Edited for rules violations.

M

You said it better than I could. Although there is a part of me that keeps wondering "who are we going to laugh at now?"

[Asta Kask]

You said it better than I could. Although there is a part of me that keeps wondering "who are we going to laugh at now?"

Oh, I don't think we need to worry about a lack of "entertainment".

[Lady Serpentine]

I've actually hated my username for a while, since I chose it when I was like 17 because I thought it sounded cool then. I only still have it out of inertia. ERS will be fine.

Know how you feel. I actually picked my username because it was a Pernese contraction of my birthname. >.>

Spoiler: WBC

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Without getting into anything that will violate forum rules, I will say this.

I will not celebrate his death, for to do so would be continuing the thing that he spouted, hate. I will simply say that I am glad there is less hate in this world and I hope we can fill the hole that this hate left with love.

M

Spoiler: General Philosophical Musings

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Personally, I would say there are some people in the world who truly do deserve to be hated. I'm not going to comment on this specific case, but the greater message in that seems to be that we shouldn't hate anyone, which is what I take objection to; if they do something bad enough why should we not hate someone for doing it?

Of course, I admit, I'm biased; there's at least one person I really do hate, for personal reasons. But still.

[golentan]

Spoiler: General Philosophical Musings

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Personally, I would say there are some people in the world who truly do deserve to be hated. I'm not going to comment on this specific case, but the greater message in that seems to be that we shouldn't hate anyone, which is what I take objection to; if they do something bad enough why should we not hate someone for doing it?

Of course, I admit, I'm biased; there's at least one person I really do hate, for personal reasons. But still.

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I don't know. I'm perfectly okay with anger, and with righteous wrath, but my experience with hate has been pretty universally bad. Anger is a powerful motivator to get up and do some good, but hate is like holding onto a hot coal. It doesn't seem to accomplish much that you can't achieve with anger, and it always leaves me feeling sickened and diminished. Obviously if someone has done something wrong you don't have to just let that go, but you also shouldn't allow it to grow into full on hatred for the person themselves.

[Lady Serpentine]

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I don't know. I'm perfectly okay with anger, and with righteous wrath, but my experience with hate has been pretty universally bad. Anger is a powerful motivator to get up and do some good, but hate is like holding onto a hot coal. It doesn't seem to accomplish much that you can't achieve with anger, and it always leaves me feeling sickened and diminished. Obviously if someone has done something wrong you don't have to just let that go, but you also shouldn't allow it to grow into full on hatred for the person themselves.

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Hm. How do you define the difference, then? It's possible what I have in mind would fall more under what you're defining as anger.

[golentan]

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Hm. How do you define the difference, then? It's possible what I have in mind would fall more under what you're defining as anger.

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Anger is when you feel upset by something that has been done wrong. You have wronged me or something I care about, and until you make it right to my satisfaction or I have time to overcome this feeling I will be angry with you. A parent being angry with a child is perfectly normal.

Hate is when anger gets taken further, to the point that you view someone as less than a person based on their actions, or even just who they are. When you want someone to die, or suffer, and nothing they could do can make it right, that's hate. A parent who hates their child is cause for calling Child Protective Services.

[Lady Serpentine]

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Anger is when you feel upset by something that has been done wrong. You have wronged me or something I care about, and until you make it right to my satisfaction or I have time to overcome this feeling I will be angry with you. A parent being angry with a child is perfectly normal.

Hate is when anger gets taken further, to the point that you view someone as less than a person based on their actions, or even just who they are. When you want someone to die, or suffer, and nothing they could do can make it right, that's hate. A parent who hates their child is cause for calling Child Protective Services.

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Ah. Nope. Hate, all the way. Well, sort of, anyhow; I don't know that I view the person in question as a non-person, but my primary regret were they to, say, suffer a fatal heart attack would be that it was much too quick.

As for why I feel that way... It's potentially triggery and pretty personal, but the short version (which is the only one I'll provide) is that they raped someone who I was, at the time, friends with.

[Arkhosia]

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Ah. Nope. Hate, all the way. Well, sort of, anyhow; I don't know that I view the person in question as a non-person, but my primary regret were they to, say, suffer a fatal heart attack would be that it was much too quick.

As for why I feel that way... It's potentially triggery and pretty personal, but the short version (which is the only one I'll provide) is that they raped someone who I was, at the time, friends with.

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totally deserved hate.
You can put in in a spoiler labeled "Trigger: Rape" or something...

[Lady Serpentine]

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totally deserved hate.
You can put in in a spoiler labeled "Trigger: Rape" or something...

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Ah, well, I would, but that's not why I'm not giving any more information on it - it's not my story to tell beyond that point. If the girl in question wishes to get into details of it, she can, but if she chooses not to, it's not my place.

Thanks for the sympathy, though. *hugs*

[Arkhosia]

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Ah, well, I would, but that's not why I'm not giving any more information on it - it's not my story to tell beyond that point. If the girl in question wishes to get into details of it, she can, but if she chooses not to, it's not my place.

Thanks for the sympathy, though. *hugs*

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Hugs!
Also, I know the perfect cheering up medicine: I prescribe KAMINA! and Baccano!.

[Heliomance]

Guys, guys, guys!

I HAVE A JOB! I HAVE A JOB I HAVE A JOB I HAVE A JOB!

I have a job, guys!



EDIT: Oh yeah, I came across this ludicrously complex Venn diagram of non-monogamous relationships, and wanted to share.

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[Arkhosia]

Guys, guys, guys!

I HAVE A JOB! I HAVE A JOB I HAVE A JOB I HAVE A JOB!

I have a job, guys!

Yay!
Good for you!

[Lady Serpentine]

Spoiler: @Ark

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Hmm? Not sure what you mean~

[Arkhosia]

Spoiler: @Ark

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Hmm? Not sure what you mean~

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Kamina, from the anime Tengen Toppa Gurren Laggan, and Baccano is an anime

[Lady Serpentine]

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Kamina, from the anime Tengen Toppa Gurren Laggan, and Baccano is an anime

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Figured it was from not knowing enough animes. I'll look into the matter.

[Lentrax]

Guys, guys, guys!

I HAVE A JOB! I HAVE A JOB I HAVE A JOB I HAVE A JOB!

I have a job, guys!

Congratulations, Tamsin! May it be so unstressful that you can lead the life of leisure you so totes deserve.

EDIT: Oh yeah, I came across this ludicrously complex Venn diagram of non-monogamous relationships, and wanted to share.

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What in the name of the Goddess is this thing? I can't even begin to... Unicorns?

Wha...?

[Eldest]

According to google, a unicorn is a bi third that is ok with being in a closed triad.

[Lentrax]

Well that makes more sense than what I was thinking...

[golentan]

According to google, a unicorn is a bi third that is ok with being in a closed triad.

So... Niels? I think that that triad is pretty much stable and closed.

[Irish Musician]

Guys, guys, guys!

I HAVE A JOB! I HAVE A JOB I HAVE A JOB I HAVE A JOB!

I have a job, guys!



EDIT: Oh yeah, I came across this ludicrously complex Venn diagram of non-monogamous relationships, and wanted to share.

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Tam that is awesome!! Congrats on getting a job! As someone who got laid off a few years back it sucked big time. And when I finally found a job again I think I actually yelled as loud as I could because I was relieved.

Also, that table......my brain just exploded

Spoiler: On the Hate thing

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I have hated before and I have gotten angry before.....neither of which I liked myself during. When I got angry I saw red, and didn't remember about 4-5 minutes of that moment. It was quite scary and I fight with anger every day, and I try not to feel like that again. And since that day I haven't, and I am so happy not to.

If this world didn't have hate, in my personal opinion, then it would be much better. Because everything that comes from hate and anger (including the thing that happened to your friend which I can't begin to know how you or her felt but only can express my deepest empathies) would cease to exists and therefore we wouldn't need to be angry at other people.

This is, of course, my personal opinion and I definitely don't want to push it on anyone else, and I want to make that clear. In my perfect world it will be gone and there would be no need of it for anyone. But I am a dreamer and I hold onto that hope. I do, also, respect other people's opinions on this, too, and want to make clear that I am not trying to "be right", only voicing my opinion about it.

M

[Miriel]

Heading off to IPL in girl mode for the first time
Not sure this is the best idea, as I have to have stubble, but I really didn't want to dress guy, and my new haircut makes it hard to pass as male anyway. I'm wrapping a scarf round my face and hoping it's okay :/

How did it go? (+ when I went to IPL, I was asked to shave closel. Strange.)

And... Yay job!

[Eldest]

Oh right. What's the job, Helio? Kinda curious. (perfectly fine if you don't want to answer)

[SiuiS]

Wouldn't you be a vata?

Dunno. I've never heard it with the female vowel structure. But then, the number of women who qualify as equals in a misogynistic clan structure is surprisingly low.

EDIT: Oh yeah, I came across this ludicrously complex Venn diagram of non-monogamous relationships, and wanted to share.

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See, that explains everything! We should have had this a week or so ago!

More seriously, I am sad that it is seemingly as much joke as clarification. Seems like it would be a useful tool. Also, Unicorns?

According to google, a unicorn is a bi third that is ok with being in a closed triad.

Oh.


I'm getting pretty damn sick of google telling me words exist twenty years after they could have saved me a lot of stress....

[Heliomance]

Oh right. What's the job, Helio? Kinda curious. (perfectly fine if you don't want to answer)

It's a programming job, I think mostly doing contracts for the MoD. And if I tell you any more, I'll have to kill you :P

[Asta Kask]

Dunno. I've never heard it with the female vowel structure. But then, the number of women who qualify as equals in a misogynistic clan structure is surprisingly low.

According to wikipedia it's derived from chivatos or chivata meaning "telltale; informer; stool pigeon". What? Anyway, chivatos would be masculine singular but plural in construction, yes? And chivata would give you... vata?

Tam, that's good news. Hope you get paid as well!

If KenderWizard discovered she was trans*, would she be a TransKender?

[Heliomance]

Guess who just passed their driving test? I'm on a roll!

[Philemonite]

It's gonna be a pretty lonely week without you guys. I'll miss you all.

Guess who just passed their driving test? I'm on a roll!

Hooray, bring out the celebration cake.

[Lentrax]

Congratulations, Tamsin.

[Miraqariftsky]

I hereby offer congratulations and comforting backpats to all who need 'em or want 'em.

That said, hallo, Queer Community of GITP. I hope y'all are doing well and hope y'all get better soon for those who aren't.

I originally wanted this to be better-crafted, more nuanced, but hell. Time presses. Time presses and I am 99% certain that a crapstorm is about to blow.

Once more, HALLO. I am... Miraqariftsky, aspiring writer, poet, artist, teacher.

Spoiler: Triggers? Confession, family friction, trans-matters.

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Also, a young transwoman in a less than ideal situation. Was brought up in, and still living under... very conservative queerphobic parents. They're good folk, other'n that.

Through some strange and unforeseen turn of events, [close family member in direct authority, hereafter referred to as X] discovered my secret stash of anti-dysphoria self-portraits, both in drawn and in photograph form. [X] is usually a very cheerful, gregarious person. Current condition is cold quiet rage, barely bottled simmering. Very uncharacteristic of [X]. I fully expect a family inquest to delve into the matter this evening, or sometime soon.

A choice line? "I RAISED YOU WELL AND THIS IS HOW YOU REPAY ME?! TREACHERY!"

Unpleasant things, and certainly conflict, are likely to transpire.

I prepared, though. Took a good chunk of today to prepare. I handwrote a letter to [Redacted], as comprehensive a chronicle-and-confession as I could make, without kicking my Right to Privacy's failureseppuku'd belly any further.

Time will tell. Hoping for the best, preparing for the worst.

[Asta Kask]

Spoiler: Miraqariftsky

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Good luck. You can depend on us to cheer you from the sidelines.

Tam - gratz!