1001+ ways to screw with your DM/Party

[toapat]

And what would be the correct answer?

in editions not relevant to this subforum? I believe storage recursion results in an explosion.

In the versions relevant to this subforum, nothing at all. There really is no reason not to stuff every bag of holding into eachother so only one partymember is carrying a single, 5-20lb sack holding the party goods.

266. Bonus if their backstory says they are best friends or dating.

Hey, thats part of my Avatar's Backstory

360: Have Faiths and Pantheons and Unearthed Arcana's variant classes in play.

360b: Have a Paladin of Freedom and a Paladin of Tyranny from the Knights of the Mystic Fire in the party.

Watch the subtle explosion of 2 paladins trying to murder eachother without violating their own codes

[Captnq]

Unless you are a StP Erudite (in which case, by RAW, it raises caster level, not manifestor level), I know of no way to get death knell in psionics. It could be a psionic version I dont know of, but as that says, I dont know of it

edit: but other than that, I like it!

DEATH KNELL, PSIONIC
- COMPLETE PSIONICS (3.5)
Psychometabolism [Death, Evil]
Level: Evil 2
Display: Auditory
Manifesting Time: 1 standard action
Range: Touch
Target: One living creature touched
Duration: Instantaneous/10 minutes per HD of subject; see text for death knell
Saving Throw: Will negates
Power Resistance: Yes
Power Points: 3
Description: A tolling bell sounds a funeral tone.
As death knell, except as noted here.
Editor (Death Knell): You draw forth the ebbing life force of a creature and use it to fuel your own power. Upon casting this power, you touch a living creature that has –1 or fewer hit points. If the subject fails its saving throw, it dies, and you gain 1d8 temporary hit points and a +2 bonus to Strength. Additionally, your effective manifester level goes up by +1, improving spell effects dependent on caster level. (This increase in effective caster level does not grant you access to more spells). These effects last for 10 minutes per HD of the subject creature.
Editor: Well, if you are willing to murder a whole bunch of people, this can make you a god. Unlike the spell version where level caps tend to limit the maximum effectiveness of, say, a caster level of 200. This power, if you have a ML of 200, would allow you to, increase the amount of matter you can affect with time hop until you could make an entire planet disappear for 5 rounds. Did I need to point out its evil?

Dude, when I write a handbook, I write a handbook. Check out the psionomicon sometime. It has EV-REE-THING. And if I'm missing something, let me know. I'll add it.

[Captnq]

361. Get every single boost you can to your initiative so you can always go first. Be really ineffective and indecisive. Ask to check one more book before taking your action. Complain that everyone is rushing you. THEY have all the time to plan their actions, but you have to do this under pressure.
362. Become a cleric of evil. Memorize the evil overlord list. Quote it constantly In Character claiming it is a (un)holy text of your god.
363. Turn into a snake, I'm sure it will help. (#34)

[Sir Chuckles]

354: Play a wizard that forbids the evocation school.

Why is this a way to screw with the DM/party?

[MilesBeyond]

#364: Roll up a replica of a famous character from D&D (e.g. Drizzt, Elminster, Melf). Insist that your character actually is that person. Bonus points if you try to convince the DM that you should be allowed to start with that character's actual levels, spells, feats, and equipment.

#365. Roll up a replica of anyone famous, real or fictional. Mimic that person's personality, accent, habits, etc, as perfectly as possible. Change one or two letters in the name. When other players point out the similarities, deny having any knowledge of whoever it is you've copied, or whatever material they happen to be drawn from. If the discussion continues, angrily assert that they're all lying because they are jealous of your creative abilities.

#366. Roll up a Commoner - make sure the stats are as bad as possible. Give the character the exact same name as a player at the table. Whenever you do something stupid or suicidal, announce you are doing so in a deadpan voice while maintaining direct eye contact with the person you named the character after.

#367. Roll up a Chaotic Good Drow.

[Immabozo]

DEATH KNELL, PSIONIC

- snip -

Dude, when I write a handbook, I write a handbook. Check out the psionomicon sometime. It has EV-REE-THING. And if I'm missing something, let me know. I'll add it.

I have never seen that one. Interesting. I certainly will go read your handbook!

[FidgetySquirrel]

Why is this a way to screw with the DM/party?

Sorry, my group is really inexperienced. They thought if I can't blast everything, I'm useless. Needless to say, I blew their minds in our first encounter with color spray.

[Immabozo]

Sorry, my group is really inexperienced. They thought if I can't blast everything, I'm useless. Needless to say, I blew their minds in our first encounter with color spray.

That group sounds like fun

[FidgetySquirrel]

That group sounds like fun

It is, actually. I like being able to experiment with low-op builds and not get funny looks for it. Not to mention, it makes things a little more interesting when I DM. I never know what wacky PCs I'm going to see next!

[MilesBeyond]

It is, actually. I like being able to experiment with low-op builds and not get funny looks for it. Not to mention, it makes things a little more interesting when I DM. I never know what wacky PCs I'm going to see next!

Makes me think of when I first played 3.x, I was so used to the AD&D system that I thought that when I multiclassed, all my classes needed to advance evenly and could never be more than one level apart. Combine that with the rush over discovering that race/class restrictions were now gone and that you could use multiclass to make any conceivable combination and I ended up making some weird builds.

Although my favourite character from that time, a Half-Orc Barbarian/Druid, may actually not have been all that terrible.

In any case, this gives me an idea for a campaign: Everyone has to roll a counter-intuitive and highly suboptimal race/class combination. What binds the party together is the collective chip on their shoulder from wanting to prove to society that they're not useless.

Soon the world will be in awe at the might of Hollendale, the Half-elf Monk4/Ranger3/Sorcerer1/Wizard1/Rogue1 and his band of Merry Misfits!

[Immabozo]

It is, actually. I like being able to experiment with low-op builds and not get funny looks for it. Not to mention, it makes things a little more interesting when I DM. I never know what wacky PCs I'm going to see next!

I'm totally serious, I would love that group.

My group thinks they can optimize, but when, what I thought was the bust optimizer, told me the straight monk was the only build that could kill a wizard, I lost faith.

[MilesBeyond]

I'm totally serious, I would love that group.

My group thinks they can optimize, but when, what I thought was the bust optimizer, told me the straight monk was the only build that could kill a wizard, I lost faith.

I'm actually amazed at the amount of experienced players I run into who complain that the Monk is overpowered, especially at high levels. Apparently being able to cast a super crappy version of Finger of Death once per week is unbalancing? :/

I'll try to point it out and they'll be like "Oh, maybe in Pathfinder. I hear they super nerfed the Monk. In 3.5 the Monk is incredible."

[Raven777]

#368. Disjunct the McGuffin needed to destroy the BBEG at the very last minute, preferably during the actual boss fight. Turn on your party. Once the dust falls down, declare that as the last living PC, you win D&D.

[Sir Chuckles]

I'm actually amazed at the amount of experienced players I run into who complain that the Monk is overpowered, especially at high levels. Apparently being able to cast a super crappy version of Finger of Death once per week is unbalancing? :/

I'll try to point it out and they'll be like "Oh, maybe in Pathfinder. I hear they super nerfed the Monk. In 3.5 the Monk is incredible."

Tell them to ask about it here next Monday.
My group isn't heavy on the optimization, mostly because I alter encounters to suit their cheese levels. And they're lactose intolerant.
Though I'm starting to get a little bit more annoyed with some of them, but that's a rant meant for a rant thread, not this thread.

369. Directly state "I still haven't learned the rules, and I have no plans on doing so."

[John Longarrow]

370. Run a character that hits on every female they meet... EVERY FEMALE...
Player to Dragon "Hey tall, dark and scaly, wanna ditch this crowd for someplace a little more... Dark.. and Dreary?"

I heard about this from another DM. They had to postpone the encounter until the next session because NO ONE could get back into the right state of mind EXCEPT the player.

[ArqArturo]

370. Run a character that hits on every female they meet... EVERY FEMALE...
Player to Dragon "Hey tall, dark and scaly, wanna ditch this crowd for someplace a little more... Dark.. and Dreary?"

I heard about this from another DM. They had to postpone the encounter until the next session because NO ONE could get back into the right state of mind EXCEPT the player.

A player does this, every freakin' game. It's annoying, and creepy.

[Ferronach]

371: play a warforged that does not understand non-constructs (think of someone who does not know what a dog is, meeting a dog)
372: refer to all non-constructs as "squishies" or "fleshies" etc.
373: dissect a fallen npc/follower to determine what kind of "magic" animated the "fleshies"
374: perform the dissection in front of the party
375: use your large dwarven waraxe to perform the dissection and only have an into of ~10
We play with sanity points in the campaign where I am the warforged so the party had to make repeated sanity checks....

376: as a warforged (do not sleep/trance etc.) stay up all night doing things without thinking about how loud you are being and that the "fleshies" need sleep
377: rp your character as confused when the rest of the party is grouchy and fatigued
378: OOC mouth off to the party for not "giving it their all" during the next combat encounter when they are fatigued...
I love playing a Warforged 'cause it lets me be a jerk, get away with it and get RPing XP all the while XD

[Immabozo]

379: Giving your players RP exp for this

I love playing a Warforged 'cause it lets me be a jerk, get away with it and get RPing XP all the while XD

[FidgetySquirrel]

I'm actually amazed at the amount of experienced players I run into who complain that the Monk is overpowered, especially at high levels. Apparently being able to cast a super crappy version of Finger of Death once per week is unbalancing? :/

I'll try to point it out and they'll be like "Oh, maybe in Pathfinder. I hear they super nerfed the Monk. In 3.5 the Monk is incredible."

That makes me think of another.

380: When someone in your group says "I'm gonna play a fighter!" respond with "No, you're gonna be a monk."

When I heard about that happening to a friend of mine, I died a little inside.

[Yael]

381. Play a Wizard, always prepare the same spell for each level (like the same spell at 1st, and a different one at 2nd, but always the same.)
*Bonus points if that spell is not useful inside battle.
**Double that bonus if that bonus somehow helps the enemy.
***Triple that bonus if you employ useless metamagics in that spell (like Invisible Color Spray.)

382. Play a Barbarian, never rage because you're peaceful, even though you don't follow anyone's rules.

[Raven777]

#383. Insist that D&D being a RPG, and all RPGs being made by Bioware, you should be able to earn Dark Side Points.

[ArqArturo]

384. Play a human cleric of a really racist human-only god, and every time any non-human in your party asks a heal, make a bluff check and cast inflict. If they complain, just say "I believe your god is blocking my deity's blessings. It is understandable, such as you are X".

385. Make the character insufferable, yet survivable, as you are gonna get a lot of flack. Since you're a CoDzilla, you'll be fine

386. Treat all small characters like children, even if they attack you.

[RSSwizard]

A Lich which casts Empowered Death Throes on itself, then uses spells like (Empowered) Greater Fireburst, maybe with energy substitution so they can make it stick.

That way it gets up close and personal, and when you do kill it, it blows your whole party to hell.

Then it comes back a few days later and does it to some other poor adventuring party out there in the world.

It doesnt even use its cool equipment, it just picks up the things off the people it kills in villages and crap. So it leaves no treasure behind when you do kill it.

Hey its gotta get XP from somewhere.

====

EDIT - - - This is actually a DM douche move. I was gonna do it but I havent run a game since where I would be able to. They would still encounter the same Lich at lower levels but it would "go soft" on them. By its death it gets a free teleport anyway. It was going to be a more supernatural version of Jason Vorhees, it was even going to wear a mask and use a Falchion (machete). What's his motivation? He just likes killing, all day and all night. L'Rhac the Defiler.

[JackRackham]

42.a. Spike the punch with philters of love.
42.b. Alternatively, replace healing potions with philters of love.

42.c. Craft a splash weapon based on the Phllter of Love with a large area of effect, pass it off as a splash weapon with a much smaller area of effect, and sell it to would-be adventurers.

[Sir Chuckles]

384. Play a human cleric of a really racist human-only god, and every time any non-human in your party asks a heal, make a bluff check and cast inflict. If they complain, just say "I believe your god is blocking my deity's blessings. It is understandable, such as you are X".

Zarus. You're thinking of Zarus.
It's certainly an interesting character concept, but I'm leaning toward it being an NPC concept...
Hence why it's perfect for the list!

[Doorhandle]

385: Have a dragon disguise itself as an entirely different kind of dragon. Laugh as it's breath weapon penetrates the party's carefully prepared wards.
386: Apply the young temple 8 times to a tarrasque. Menace the players with the dog-sized god-beast.
387: Apply the young template 8 times to a lv 20 gunslinger/dervish dancer. Laugh as it one-hits the players with is massively oversized dex-bonus.
388: Make a level 1 barbarian with the advanced template applied 19 times. Laugh as he 1-hits them with his ludicrous strength modifier.
389: Abuse the giant/young templates 100s of times so you have 1 creature with stupidly-high A.C, but that retains it's normal C.R.
390: Play a warforged that questions whether organic being have souls.
391: Arrets the players for the murders they committed while dungeoneering.

[ArqArturo]

392. Have your NPC cleric, a half-orc cleric/barbarian of a war deity (and must have Rage, Power Attack, and Divine Might) of X town have a heavy flail that heals living creatures when it strikes, instead of any actual damage (hitting undead makes normal damage). Therefore when the players ask for healing, let the cleric go nuts and start pounding them.

It won't screw with them in the long run, but watch your players' expresion when you say "As the half orc agrees to help, he whips out the meanest, biggest heavy flail you've ever seen, enters into a frenzy, and starts attacking you".

[Thomas Hunter]

NOTHING screams munchkin like having your own invisible, flying, undead whale stronghold.

May I sig this?

[toapat]

Zarus. You're thinking of Zarus.
It's certainly an interesting character concept, but I'm leaning toward it being an NPC concept...
Hence why it's perfect for the list!

393: Play a Nonhuman Cleric of Zarus.

[Raven777]

#394 Play a Chaotic Good Cleric of Groetus. Laugh quietly as people go "wait wat?!".