Streets of the Town XVII

[Deadly]

A large bear enters from the woods and walks calmly through the streets, stopping to smell and look around once in a while. It tries it's best to stay away from the stinking demon.

[Rebonack]

Maph'tey gets pulled out of the filth and is, oddly enough, grinning.

"You lose. Good day, sir."

The area directly surrounding Maph'tey and the golem is suddenly subsumed in an incredible burst of radiant energy as a small portion of the space/time is converted into raw power via Continuum Nova.

Fortunately for the Town in general the blast is localized to where the crap monster is standing.

((Attacks for use in joke fights make me smile =D))

[Nevrmore]

((Aww, I was hoping I could make this last long enough for Lues to come out and kill him with seeds.))

The Crap Demon roars as his body is slowly solidified from the heat, crumbling away mere moments afterwards. As he disintegrates, one can't help but wonder about the futitility of life. Or something.

[Rebonack]

((There's plenty of crap to go around. Just have another show up.))

Maph'tey, covered from head to toe in dried effluent, staggers to his feet, looking absolutely exhausted.

"That always makes me feel loopy when I'm done..."

"Yes! Now that's what I'm talking about!" comes a disturbingly pleased voice from the currently brown right wing. "Do it again, but without the limit on the area it vaporizes this time!"

"How about no..." Maph'tey responds as he flops over backwards, completely spent. Upon hitting the ground there's a wet 'spud'.

Eeeeww...

[Deadly]

The large bear somehow finds its way to Trog's and for some odd reason decides to enter.

[Nevrmore]

((Rebonack., you have just made me create a character that will reign down horror upon everyone he meets.))

"How very unfortunate...Usually, just one is enough to topple any village." A man says, wading through the muck without so much as noticing the putrid stench, "This place is strange...Or maybe I am just losing my touch." The man holds out a hand, summoning a small geyser of muck into it, which forms a brown sword. "Either way, this man is far too dangerous to my cause to keep alive."

[Rebonack]

((Now I want to see a fight between Descartes and this guy XD))

Maph'tey is hardly able to lift his head off the ground to see the approaching man holding a weapon made of...

"...the hell...?" he manages to choke out weakly.

[Nevrmore]

"Don't try to speak, boy, it will distract me from seeing the look on your face as death overtakes you." The man spins the sword of questionable components around so that the blade faces downward. He hovers his hand over Maph'tey's chest, readying it to plunge through his heart.

[Rebonack]

The Traveler is far too weakened from his attack to resist. So instead he gives a heroic final words shpeal.

"I'm not the strongest here in Town," he manages to choke out. "You'll never be able to defeat us all."

[Nevrmore]

"I've heard it before." The man says, plunging the sharp sword into Maph'tey's gut. "Be thankful, your decomposing corpse will be used to strengthen by golems."

[Rebonack]

Maph'tey stiffens, filthy bile bubbling up in his mouth.

"I... I can taste key-lime pie..."

X_x

[Nevrmore]

The man lets go of the sword, letting it sit in Maph'tey's stomach. It slowly melts down to its prime component of...eww, seeping into the open wound and spreading out over his body.

"No one stands against the great Ivor and lives, you poor deluded fool."

[Rebonack]

Fortunately before it can be violated any further, Maph'tey's corpse crumbles into some kind of strange glittering sand and begins to evaporate into the ether.

[Nevrmore]

((I still want that to count as a kill.))

"Damn. I hope this doesn't mean that man will become a thorn in my side.." Ivor says, annoyed.

[Rebonack]

((Totally still a kill. Maph'tey always does that when he dies.))

[Nevrmore]

((Good. I want a manipulator of fecal matter to be taken seriously, now.))

[Rebonack]

A random NPC child looks upon the spectacle with his mouth handing open, an ice-cream cone in hand.

[Nevrmore]

Ivor looks at the child. With a wave of his hand, a whip of muck shoots out, wraps around his ice cream cone, and plucks it from his grasp. Ivor eats it merrily.

[NecroPaladin]

((I hope you're happy. My propaganda is now covered in poo. Well, at least I typed up the headquarters thread.))

[Rebonack]

The child begins to cry, summoning his NPC warrior father.

The man brandishes his short sword at Ivor.

"Fiend! I will strike you down!" he roars as he rushes the crap-o-mancer, aiming to run his poniard through the man's gut.

[Obsidian Blade]

Amik and Lelin leave Trog's. Amin heads to the Slums while Lelin slips off to the Town Hill Apartments after 'asking' directions from a terrified pedestrian.

[Nevrmore]

Ivor flicks his wrist again, a stream of "Forget-me-not" fluid flying straight into the warrior father's mouth.

[Goblin Music]

Dall walks out of the church of seed mumbling. and heads to sneaks.

[Rebonack]

The man gurgles awfully and drops to his knees, attempting to expel the foul substance.

((Sorry. PM me if you think I haven't noticed your post.))

[Nevrmore]

Ivor waves his hands in a grandiose manner as the sewage around the man begins to move under his influence, shooting up around the NPC. The crap takes a solid form, making a coccoon around him which lifts him up into the air.

"Crap Coffin." Ivor grins, "And now...Fecal Funeral!" He clenches his hands into fists which makes the crap around the man tighten quickly, enough to liquefy bone.

[Destro_Yersul]

Destro shoots out of Trog's on his motorbike, going a speed which wouldn't be safe if they weren't intangible. As it is, intervening objects are simply phased through, rather than objecting rather strenuously to high velocity impact.

[Warpfire]

Nathaniel walks out of the tavern and looks around. Seeing the man being crushed to death by crap, he cringes slightly.

"That's a horrible, horrible way to die..."

[Rebonack]

((Eeeww. He just got Naruto'ed D=))

With a gurgling scream and a spurt of blood the man dies rather horribly.

[Nevrmore]

((I admit it; I like Gaara.))

Ivor laughs maniacally, "Now let your blood mingle with the eternal feces of life, my dead friend." He turns around and notices a crowd of NPCs have gathered. "Well well, while I'm at it..."

Ivor plunges his hands, palm-first, through the liquid and onto the ground. A ripple of energy is sent through the sewage, and suddenly all the NPCs on the street are sucked below screaming, gurgling, flailing.

"Imperial Fecal Funeral!" He shouts. The disgusting muck tightens around them, and suddenly over a dozen NPC bodies are snuffed out in one of the most horrible ways possible.

[Warpfire]

Nathaniel is unlucky enough to get hit by the spurt of blood from the NPC warrior father. The blood hits him on his chestplate. Nathaniel looks down and frowns at the sewage mixed in with the blood. "How disgusting."

He looks around for who is responsible, and catches sight of Ivor. "Say, not that I have any problem, but why are you murdering random people? Its getting my armor all dirty."