Outside 44: Baby it's cold outside

[Gullara]

This place is just as it sounds. It's Outside!
Want a change of scenery? Go Outside.
Always wanted to visit the beach? Come Outside.
Looking to have a climatic fight on clifftops? Attempt Outside.
Secret meetings being held where there's no cameras? Try Outside.
Want an ambush without nasty base defenses? Yep! Outside.

Any and all are welcome in the wild expanses beyond the reach of civilization. Who's going to keep you out? That's right, no one. You're already out!
Here lie vast expanses, dense forests, towering mountains, dizzying canyons, treacherous dungeons, encroaching jungles, roaring waterfalls, endless wastes, blistering deserts, mossy cliffs, illusionary oases, eldritch moors, flowering bosques, infested hills, cyclopean ruins, weed-tangled gardens, crumbling glaciers, peaceful glades, bubbling tar pits, rumbling volcanoes, teetering hoodoos, honeycombed caverns, dripping grottos, inland seas, grassy knolls, overgrown battlefields, creepy boneyards, guano-covered caves, and so much more!
The sky is truly the limit, and sometimes not even that. If you can imagine it, it's here, and something super cool is probably happening there.


Sometimes, amid the varied and fantastic landscapes, there are very specific places. Places created and maintained by one or two people. These often be visited, but don't forget to give their owner a heads up if you want to explore.

Outside contains various Outside locations! Such as...

Spoiler

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Auxiliary MagCave: Magtok
A relic from the days of the Age of Apocalypse, this abandoned cavern was once used by the infamous cyborg Magtok as a back-up laboratory and underground fortress, should Calublufiok have ever stormed the primary MagCave.

Blind Cat's Bluff
A sheer cliff dropoff that travels straight down into the water, this is a favored point of people who commit suicide, romantics wanting to watch the sunset and anyone looking to get rid of evidence. The drop is pretty far and there are rocks at the bottom that spell almost certain doom, so watch your step.

Brillian's Baneful Bestiary
A secret series of caves where a mad scientist lives. A mad scientist who creates mutant attack creatures. These can be purchased for the right price.

Dead Pine Lake: happyturtle
This lake lies in the middle of the forest. On the eastern shore, woodpeckers feast on the dead pines that give the lake its name. Sometimes one can find Lady Death here, the Aspect of Eve also known as The Grandmother, or Jedwiga.

Frozen Forest & Hermitage
A large forest of tall trees and once very pretty flowers lies here. The entire forest has been completely frozen over, and a blizzard constantly storms and snows over the forest, but doesn't affect even an inch past the forest border. The forest is still very pretty; the flowers and mushrooms glittering under a frozen layer. The place is pretty safe, if you're used to constant snow and cold temperatures.

Gersemi's Island: Lex-Kat
Now more commonly known as Melody's Island, since Gersemi has long ago retired. Where once was a single hut with a few sheep, now stands a single hut, a barn, a few sheep, and a small tented community of orphans. Gersemi's loom still rests in one corner of the single hut. Melody, like Gersemi before her, is a healer for the surrounding islands.

Katz Motel
Located in the middle of Nowhere, our roadside motel is the only decent place for miles near the Taverna that has a bed. Run by a suave anthropomorphic cat, there is a strict No Dogs policy. A bellhop by the name of Bates is always ready to assist in carrying your luggage. Please ignore his constant mutterings about his mother. Other more unsavory employees can occasionally be found. Please try to avoid eye contact with them.

We at the Katz Motel wish to ensure you have a splendid stay. Any inconvenience due to randomly locking doors, giant spiders, secret passages, vampires, creepy paintings, and the occasional possession and subsequent exorcism are incredibly rare. Just look at our complaint cards! Not a single one mentions dying horribly in their sleep or becoming food for the monster in the basement.

And if you get bored, the owner will always be up for a game of sport, old boy.

Spoiler: OoC

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((The Katz Motel is a horror filled place with the highest casualty rate of any motel in the Nexus area. Checking in is usually pretty easy and pleasant. Checking out is rare. Anyone can play the Motel and the NPCs within, free to invent their own horror. The NPCs within that can die usually only suffer death temporarily, the supernatural force causing the disturbances bringing them back to life for its own nefarious purposes. PCs get no benefit from this.))

Norosa, Great City of the Elves
A lawful evil city with an incredibly strong military and a very charismatic leader (Archmage Tyrion Lannister). It has a few resisters, but otherwise it is a city of peace and law despite its evil nature.

North Forest
A magical forest with a mythical spring of beauty. A bit like the Weald, but not nearly as dangerous. For starters, you can find your way back out and the pixies aren't cannibals.

Redbrick Falls
A mountainous, cliffy region with a prominent waterfall. A large quarry once was worked in these cliffs. Now, only a few scattered villages and solitary dwellings remain.

Rabbit Hole
The Rabbit Hole is a portal to another world, located in the forest. It looks like an ordinary rabbit hole, minus it being large enough for whoever stumbles upon it to enter. Some say it originated in a different universe, outside the Nexus, others say it shows up in different universes as a result of the Nexus growing.

If found naturally, it will take you to Underside, a world said to lie beneath the Nexus. But sometimes, you'll see a white rabbit in a waistcoat. He looks at the time on his pocket watch, and mutters the phrase "Oh dear! Oh dear! I mustn't be late!" and runs off. No matter how fast you are, you always seem to be just a bit slower than him, which has to make you wonder how he could ever be late for something.

If you follow the rabbit and find The Rabbit Hole, it will take you to Planeside. Where specifically in Planeside depends on who fell through The Rabbit Hole. Either way, you should always survive the fall, even if it seems like you were falling forever. And a warning, it's a one way trip, so if you want to get back, you'll have to do some traveling.

Troll Cave
A cave in a craggy hill. The undergrowth outside is trampled completely flat, and there's not much wildlife. There's a burned patch where a fire is sometimes there. Inside are a few large caves, linked by surprisingly smooth tunnels that look like something big has been regularly pushing through them.

Unnamed Islands
An island cluster forms an archipelago along the coast. Some of the islands are settled, some not, but most are at least occasionally visited by the fishermen who work these waters.

PM the thread maker if you wish to add locations to Outside.

This wide world is empty, except for what you put there. People and places and animals and monsters! You name it. There are a few exceptions, as there always are, but by and large these places are populated with what you put there.

Spoiler: Inhabitants

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• The Creepy Eyed Squirrel - The creepy eyed squirrel does not interfere with anyone. The creepy eyed squirrel is everywhere outside. The creepy eyed squirrel is always watching. The creepy eyed squirrel never sleeps. The creepy eyed squirrel can not be damaged, manipulated, or killed by anyone. The creepy eyed squirrel will eat anyone's very being who attempts to do so. Anyone can god-mode the creepy eyed squirrel. You may pet the creepy eyed squirrel at your own risk.
• The Menacing Crabs - These intimidating creatures are usually found by the shore. Beware their mighty pincers. Beware!
• The Non-Existent Duck - You'll miss every time you shoot at it, and then your dog laughs at you.

And most importantly, enjoy Outside. That's what this is all about.

---

Rules and Guidelines

Spoiler

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There is very little you can't do Outside. However, like always, please follow the forum rules and general rules of conduct. Respect that a scene may be private or that a plot shouldn't be interrupted. When in doubt, ask someone involved in the OoC thread or by PM.

There are many areas Outside, and people can be in multiple places outside. In order to keep areas Outside separated so there's no confusion, consider bolding your outside location at the start of each of your posts, like so:

[An Epic Cliffside Battle]

The creepy eyed squirrel looks on at the raging battle with contempt! Contempt that only a squirrel with particularly creepy eyes can muster.

[The Beach!]

The menacing craps are not only menacing today, but frustrated. Their every attempt to menace the non-existent duck has met with failure. Some might ask why the crabs are trying to menace nothing, but those people would get viciously pinched.

Note the creepy eyed squirrel and the menacing crabs do not interact because they are in different areas Outside. They could interact, if the squirrel moved to the beach. Of course, various things like telepathy help bypass this.

Archive

Spoiler

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Outside 43: Where the sun hurts your eyes and burns your skin
Outside 42
Outside 41: Inside Outside, outside Inside
Outside 40: It's all downhill from here
Outside XXXIX
Outside XXXVIII
Outside XXXVII
Outside XXXVI
Outside XXXV
Outside XXXIV
Outside XXXIII
Outside XXXII
Outside XXXI
Outside XXX
Outside XXIX
Outside XXVIII
Outside XXVII
Outside XXVI
Outside XXV
Outside XXIV
Outside XXIII
Outside XXII
Outside XXI
Outside XX
Outside XIX
Outside XVIII
Outside XVII
Outside XVI
Outside 15: There used to be a silly pun here, but it wouldn't fit
Outside XIV: More animals than you can shake a stick at. Yes the PCs.
Outside XIII: Spores of Corruption Dance in the Wind
Outside XII: We number things correctly.
Outside XI: Bugs are Eating the Landscape
Outside X: The Rotting Corpses are starting to Smell
Outside IX: There are Mosquitoes
Outside VIII: We cater birthday parties
Outside VII: Open longer than a 7-11
Outside VI: Now with Locations!
Outside V: More civilized than Inside
Outside IV: The Creepy Eyed Squirrel's Domain
Outside III: Beware the Non-Existant Duck
Outside II: Now with Menacing Crabs
Outside

[Solidarity]

[Outside the Temple Gate]

Oooh, another dragon. Is he blind, with those eyes? Doesn't seem like it. It isn't clear which side he's on - fighting the cyborgs who are fighting the demons who are fighting the panda while being attacked by the wizards. This dimensional vortex is a mess.

Best to stay focus on the engines. Without these weapon emplacements, the demons will have a harder time holding on to this site against all these displaced beings. And to get to the engines, it's best to remove the contraptions' guards. Cleo lets some of the spells of hiding fade away and starts to sing another spell. A wavering sound jumps up and down until it matches the frequency these gargoyles resonate at, and then it starts getting louder and louder, so that in short order they should shake themselves to pieces.

[Outside the Temple Gate]‎

Hei considers letting the two sides weaken each other, then picking off the rest... and decides to thin the numbers of the more numerous time. Speaking to the concept kami of the grass, he commands them to grow uncontrollably, round the feet of the ground soldiers. At the same time, the ground is commanded to soften up in order to make it hard for them to move.

Then his glance falls on Cleo and he grins, then turns his attention away from her... for now.‎
‎‎

[Outside the Temple Gate]

The pit knights armors are actually specifically designed to resist magical effects so his strikes aren't as effective as he might have hoped. The knights are still visible distraught by the swirling figure of a man moving around them. Moving far too fast for them to strike back.
The gates are open however and a pit lord emerges, less armored than the knights but it's eyes are glowing with magical energy. Seeing the flash of a man attacking the guards it channels into gloved hand which it directs in the general direction the wizard who will be afflicted by a magical weakness which will make it difficult to move. "Sorraka!" It roars, some type of command as the knights spears suddenly start to reshape into great swords...

Meanwhile out on the battlefield whatever grass that is left after the cannons fire rapidly starts growing into a hedge just as the ground starts turning into mud. Causing the invaders to sink down into the mud and having to fight through the grass, leaving them vulnerable for the cannons fire. But the very same fire also torches the grass and dries up the mud again. Still, the horde is slowed down just as they are set upon by the demonic hounds the pit knights unleashed, causing a melee. The hounds who are about a dozen and while their claws seem to effortlessly cut through their armored foes they are drastically outnumbered and the horde swarms them from each side. Showing no fear or hesitation. Each mind filled with utter devotion to whatever twisted cause they're following.

Up on the ledge the angel-like creature have descended upon one of the cannons and is making quick of the gargoyles protecting it, moving far too fast for them to to even land a hit on it. The guardians of the second isn't faring better, desperately looking around for a foe to fight as they're quickly shaking apart.

[Outside the Temple Gate]

No matter how many years the chronomancer witnessed it, he never did agree with the way the world seemed to dim and wash to gray in his perspective whenever he moved outside the flow of time. Many assume while he does so, he's incredibly fast, though in reality it's as if everyone's moving through jello, or like they're caught in some terrible, overly dramatic slo-mo scene. The more he focuses on his abilities, the farther detached from the normal flow of time Eternus becomes. All in all, he's been fighting like a normal human being to a certain degree, at least in regards to swordplay. Seeing that his magic's being nullified when attempting to sunder his opponents' armor and weapons, the mage lets out a small sigh of regret. He didn't really want to kill them. Though now, it seemed that the new, metallic enemies would very soon fail if The Bronze Wizard didn't legitimately fight.

Powers forgive me. He offers a quick mental condolence, remembering his oath on taking the power of the Stormguard.

He glimpsed the arrival of the sorcerous, lighly armored daemon as it approached, in his eyes, barely moving. With enough time to spare, Suscipio abandoned his goals of leaving the killing for the metal horrors, and made several thrusts wherever he could find areas uncovered by the daemons' magical armor--joints, neck folds, attachment points, eye holes, anywhere his blade could find daemon flesh to rend while in his temporal blister. The mud would be as solid as stone to the mage, as it would not knead to his steps quickly enough in his current state offset from time to make notable difference. He knew that he and his colleague could afford no more time spent on fodder, and needed to hustle if they wanted to put an end to this chaos.

It's only when he notices the magical pit lord's hand begin to move up that the chronomancer bolts over until directly behind said fiend as its hand completes the motion. Assuming the Wizard needed to at least be in that general direction for the dark magic to take effect, it won't find the chronomancer as a target. At that point, he'll slam the butt of the sword onto any part of the lesser armored daemon's back that looks the most exposed. At the relative 'speed' he was traveling, such an attack may be jarring for such a creature, if not paralyzing for most mortals.

[Fenric]

[Dream of Dragons]

"Yep. She says you know the way."

Cleo smiles and nods.

"Once we're done here, we can go there and get it. Sthissa, we'll need somewhere to meet you in a physical world to get the magic on it right. We'll suggest to Meena that she wait a while. I think her new dragon friend will have kept her from sneaking up the mountain already."

Keiko grins

To Grandmother's house? Yeah...

She sings jauntily

Into the woods
And down the dell,
The path is straight,
I know it well.
Into the woods,
And who can tell
What's waiting on the journey?

Into the woods to Grandmother's house!

Sthissa looks quizzically at the singing dragoness, and answers Cleo

That sounds like a more than reasonable plan, thank you both so very much for your help.

[Recaiden]

[Dream of Dragons]

Best be at the singing dragonesses, then.

"Over the river,
and through the woods,
with a clear blue sky~
No matter that the winds may blow,
Or that she will not see us come,
to Grandmother's house we go!"

Cleo laughs and waves.

"Good night, Sthissa."

And stops paying attention to this dream.

[Fenric]

[Dragon Dawn]

It's just a bit chilly, and the dew has condensed all over. Keiko's water-repellant scales did a good job of making the water drain... but it has made the bedding quite soggy.

Meena has just discovered this property of water dragons herself, having slept wrapped around the other water dragon.

Eeeew! I'm all wet!

The wild dragoness looks up with sleepy blinkings

Grnnnk?

[Recaiden]

[Dragon Dawn]

Cleo opens her eyes sleepily, but then quickly gets up to shake off the water.

"Water dragons, huh?"

She looks about blearily. It's too early for this.

[Cyber Punk]

The Tower - Flour Four

"I'd love to work on some vehicles. Just like the training you gave me with firearms," Phil says to Zither. "Maybe I can experiment on some of the trashed vehicles or their parts while we're at it."

"Yes, to finish and start again," Phil says to Luna, returning her wink.

(For reference purposes)

[Earl of Purple]

Spoiler: Previous posts, from last thread.

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[Tower - Floor Four]

‎"Don't worry, Phil. Soon, we'll all bond together, you and I included. Then we'll finish what we've started." Luna winks, and gets up as Zither and Nisha show up.

The fourteen-year old ninja is not deterred! "Don't change the subject." Nisha retorts, scowling. "You know sister Luna won't mind one bit."

"Heh, as fun as that'll be, we'll just glide there, or hoverboard there, or do some acrobatic jumping. Also, mind what?" Luna looks to Nisha, then to Zither. "You know you can tell me anything, Zii. What're sisters for?"

Nisha turns to look at Zither with a 'told you so' look on her face, still scowling.

The Tower - Flour Four

"I'd love to work on some vehicles. Just like the training you gave me with firearms," Phil says to Zither. "Maybe I can experiment on some of the trashed vehicles or their parts while we're at it."

"Yes, to finish and start again," Phil says to Luna, returning her wink.

The Tower- Floor Four

"Nisha asked to see my tail-stump. I don't want to show it to her. It's ugly. She said you wouldn't mind its ugliness, but I do and it's my tail- or was. That's the problem." Zither would like to either have no tail at all, or have a proper tail like she should. Instead, she's got about an inch of tail-stump ending abruptly, though the wound occurred when she was so young it didn't scar. And if Phil tried to regenerate it, he might turn her into a weasel and she doesn't want that.

[Cyber Punk]

The Tower Floor Four

The return of Raikiri! "I'll leave you to it, hey I did make a promise, blah blah, but... let's cut it off!" Her red-eyed side of her face grins. She retracts herself just as Luna gives herself a shut-up slap.

"Sorry about that. Still working out kinks." Luna frowns, rubbing her face and staring at Nisha, who's staring back. She runs over to hug Luna and cling to her, hoping to make it alright somehow.

Luna sighs and continues, looking at Zither. "If you show it to me, I'll help fix your tail. Specialized nanobots could give you a tail again, or give you something that acts like one." She flashes an easy smile at her fiend-blooded friend. "You know I always want to help out, Zi."‎

[Fenric]

[Dragon Dawn]

Cleo opens her eyes sleepily, but then quickly gets up to shake off the water.

"Water dragons, huh?"

She looks about blearily. It's too early for this.

Keiko looks up, no more a fan of this time of day than Cleo

Wuh?

Meena giggles, and it seems like the wild dragoness does too.

Good morning! You guys like to sleep in, huh? Well, relax: I'll get a fire going.

And she bounds up and into the woods, followed closely by her new best friend forever.

Keiko rests her chin on Cleo

The only good thing about morning is that it eventually turns into afternoon.

[Recaiden]

[Dragon Dawn]

"Thank you, Meena."

Cleo leans into Keiko a little bit.

"Not quickly enough, sometimes."

And finds a slightly dryer place to lay back down. They made an unbreakable giant canyon passageway last night. Still tired.

[Fenric]

[Dragon Dawn]

Keiko looks around, and sniffs a few times, concentrates briefly... and then sighs

There is a distinct lack of servants around here.

And is it seriously only five forty-five am? Ugh... not nearly close enough to noon.

her stomach growls

And there's no fish... Imma cheat!

[Recaiden]

[Dragon Dawn]

Cleo opens one eye again to look at her.

"Just..."
"Wait, aren't you supposed to have someone ask for you to use magic?"
"Here. Dear Holy Keiko, can we please have some breakfast and another hour to sleep?"

Shuts her eye again - if she can't see the world it can't make her get up.

[Fenric]

[Dragon Dawn]

Keiko grins

Oh! That works, too!

And she grants her dear beloved Cleo a Create Food and Drink: a significant array of fish and steak and veggies and bread, oh my! Easily enough for three dragons and a little girl.

Meena and the dragoness return with firewood. She blinks at the food, but is getting used to miracles where Cleo and Keiko are involved

Uh... wow! Ok, gimme a sec to get the fire going.

She kneels down to work. Meanwhile, the other dragon comes up very subserviently: eyeing the food and making little squeaks. Keiko chuckles

Looks like she's hungry, too.

[Recaiden]

[Dragon Breakfast]

"Thank you love~"

When Meena comes back with the firewood, Cleo finally gets up to stay awake.

"Well, she can have some to eat too."

Then she goes to help the little Sthiss with the fire. Not that it will really get it going any faster.

[Fenric]

[Dragon Breakfast]

Keiko squeaks at the dragoness, and she starts to eat the fish. Keiko nods, and noms up some whole cold fish herself.

Over at the fire-building, there's soon enough a cheerful crackling blaze chasing the morning mist away. Meena goes over to the food-pile and swiftly prepares a number of skewers for roasting over the fire

I'm not keen on a cold breakfast. Do you like things better warmed up, Cleo?

[Recaiden]

[Dragon Breakfast]

"I do! Thanks, Meena."

Cleo takes a number of skewers and starts them roasting over the flames.

"Cold bread is fine, but meats should be warm."

[Fenric]

[Dragon Breakfast]

Meena looks over the food while she makes a few more skewers, and picks up a loaf: it being the only thing she completely doesn't recognize

This?

She sniffs it, then looks uncertain

It smells like grass and yeast.

Keiko grins, and gobbles up a loaf whole

Yup! And sort of... a bit more work than that, though. It's yummy! Soft inside, break a piece off and try it.

the wild dragon tentatively bites a loaf herself.

[Recaiden]

[Dragon Breakfast]

Cleo nods.

"That's bread!"

She leans her head over and takes a small bite out of Meena's loaf.

"It's a way of cooking some grasses so that they're good to eat. You grind them up and put in yeast and salt and stuff, and then bake them into this."

Bread is pretty weird, now that she thinks about it.

[Fenric]

[Dragon Breakfast]

Meena breaks the bread up and takes a bite of the bread

It's... different. Kinda good...

she contemplates the bread

Looks like it could be useful...

Keiko giggles

It is kinda weird, yeah... I wonder how the first bread managed to happen.

The wild dragon has abandoned half a loaf of bread and gone back to eating fish.

[Recaiden]

[Dragon Breakfast]

"A lot of the time, you put other kinds of food on it, or dip it into a stew."

Cleo goes to rescue the poor half-a-loaf and waits until the meat is done enough to slide onto it.

"Might have been by accident. Or somebody trying to make their grain tastier."

Doesn't really matter since they have bread now and it's delicious.

[Fenric]

[Dragon Quest]

Keiko nods, and breakfast is had by all! Soon, it's time to put out the fire and get back to business.

It's not long before the group is standing at the mouth of the long tunnel. Keiko peers into the darkness.

Is the sun at a really bad angle, or did we forget to put windows in at all?

[Recaiden]

[Dragon Quest]

Cleo giggles.

"We didn't put in windows. More solid that way, and I'm sure the Sthiss can bring their own lights."

She strides confidently into the dark of the tunnel.

[Fenric]

[Dragon Quest]

Melina and the wild dragoness follow in next, and Keiko comes along last.

It's nearly a mile in the echoing darkness, and there's a span of time where there is no light worth mentioning making it in from either end.

I'm glad we smoothed the floor well. Should we put an aversion up to keep animals and stuff out? Just a light one - if there's a really bad storm or something, they could shelter but they'd want to move on as soon as it let up.

Meena hms at the thought

But you need to let our dragon friends through!

[Recaiden]

[Dragon Tunnel

As they reach the far end and step out into the light.

"Let's leave it alone. The Sthiss week be coming through here too, and they'll take care of keeping out animals if they need. We might put on lights though... "

Cleo looks back into the dark. That was a mistake.

[Fenric]

[Dragon Tunnel]

Keiko nods

That was too dark!

Meena nods

That was kinda scary, Cleo.

Anyway... on the far side, it's really rather similar overall. Clearly, this is not a significantly weather-altering mountain range. It is perhaps a little bit drier on this side, more pines than deciduous trees, and of course the sounds waves and birds of the great lake are missing.

the dragoness looks around curiously, and sniffs at the air.

[Recaiden]

[Dragon Tunnel]

"Hmm. I liked it, actually. It just wouldn't be safe to move lots of people through. We can put an illusion on the top of it for light, maybe a..."

Disregarding that, they have this whole area on the far side to look at. Pines!

Cleo looks at the wild dragoness curiously.

"What's out here?"

[Fenric]

[Dragon Tunnel]

Keiko is also more lost in thought about the lights

I think it'd be easier to make some of the stone transparent.

The dragoness looks at Cleo with big eyes and emits a series of grunts and squeaks

Melina frowns

She's really unhappy

Keiko spins and blossoms into nine heads

ROCK DRAGON!

There's a crunching sound in the undergrowth, and abruptly a greyish beam lances out and misses the group - but it turns a nearby tree to stone!

[Recaiden]

[Dragon Tunnel]

"Oh, yeah, that we could probably do."

Cleo watches the grey beam miss them and her eyes get as big as they can go.

"Mine!"

Immediately she dives into the underbrush to look for the beast.
Wonder, did Sthissa put all these dragon-things here, or do they just occur on their own?

[Fenric]

[Dragon Tunnel]

Several of Keiko's heads look at the now-petrified tree. One checks on Meena and another on the wild dragoness, and the rest all watch Cleo.

Ok, dear.

Nope. These aren't her's. Frankly, she wishes she could have done this well now that she sees the dragon...

It's not that far away: a big, dark gray creature with long horns and a strong face. It has piercing green eyes and powerful wings, and a really impressive muscular frame. Its scales have the inconsistently reflective glint of granite, and its claws are dark as obsidian.

It blinks in some surprise as Cleo approaches.. and the mental voice it projects is decidedly....

feminine?

Oh! Oh, my... I'm so sorry: I thought you were another hunting party.