5e Adventure By Me. Yeah.

[Gluteus_Maximus]

Players: herodofcows, 2D8HP, The_Necromancer, JNAProductions, mgshamster, Sicarius Victus, Zergrinch

PCs: Erevan (Wood Elf Fighter, Age 148), Corbin Maximilian Hollow (Half-Elf Bronze Draconic Sorcerer, Age 20), Sarissa (Half-Elf Martyr, Age 19), Kaltos Van Valvic (Human Paladin, Age 52), Zuzu Greycastle (Human Mystic, Age 11) Zaran (Half-Orc Barbarian, Age 14), and Arkhen (Human Warlock, Age Unknown).

Your current positions: Your group is split between two wagons, each drawn by a horse, with a Merchant at the reins. In the first wagon is Zaran, Corbin, Elymas, and Erevan. In the second wagon is Aelar, Kaltos (and his 3 retainers), Arkhen, and Sarissa.
Your mission: A medicinal herb-salesman and a produce salesman have hired you to guard them on their way to check on the town of Sherfield, where they usually receive their supply, and outhey have not received any in about a week.

Ahead on the road, you can see another wagon going towards you, at about a quarter the pace. at the reins is something most of you have probably never seen before; A nine-foot tall man in a robe that obscures his face, plus he has bony hands. His horse, which has a mane of flowing golden hair and a singular glowing red eye on its right side, also appears very malnourished and bony. As the wagon approaches, the man notices your caravan.

He says, in a raspy tone, "Greetings... Is there a town nearby?"

[JNAProductions]

Of course-but, being frank here, you seem like a dangerous man, and I wouldn't want to risk anyone's safety. So, Sarissa says, I think it might be for the best if you're willing to offer some assurance you will not cause any danger.

[mgshamster]

A young half orc, barely of age, walks along the side of a wagon, keeping guard. He wears some simple clothing made of cheap cloth and leather and a sturdy pair of boots, and carries a large maul over one shoulder, his hand resting on the handle.

Despite his young age, he's the size of a full adult human, larger even than most, standing just over six feet and well over two hundred pounds of muscle. His larger size compared to his age is mostly to the quicker rate of physical maturity and growth the orc blood imparts on the half breed.

I'm with her, Zaran says. Tell us you ain't out fer trouble.

[Gluteus_Maximus]

The man mutters a few words, then a small piece of paper flies from his hand over to Sarissa.
"This paper will show you the way to the town of which you are headed, Sherfield. Is that proof enough?"
The paper shifts northwards in Sarissa's hand, as if it were alive. Written on it is "Rashad" in blue ink.

[JNAProductions]

...

NO! No that is not proof you mean no harm in the slightest! You're getting more suspicious by the minute! she says, hand on the hilt of her greatsword. She takes a deep breath, though, and talks again, saying Look-let's start with the simple. Do we have your word you mean no harm to anyone?

[Gluteus_Maximus]

"I have not directly harmed any creature for many years, excepting self-defense." he says.

[JNAProductions]

And now you're talking evasively. Repeat after me or I draw my blade-"I intend no harm to you, your companions, or any innocents that might be come across or sought out."

We'll START with that, Sarissa says.

[Gluteus_Maximus]

"I intend no harm to you, your companions, or any innocents that might be come across or sought out." He says, as if he's heard this before today.

[2D8HP]

Erevan a wood-elf with a face and hands that have visible burn scars making him quite ugly, wearing simple sturdy clothes, with a bow on his shoulder and a sword at his side, the scanners of which he touches with his off hands asks the stranger,
have you heard any harm in the wind?

[herodofcows]

Corbin lowers himself gingerly from the side of the cart, indicating to those seated within that he'll be right back as he strides over to the conversation holding up the road.

"Come now, friend Sarissa," he interjects, casting Dancing Lights to illuminate the area (and the stranger), "If an unusual appearance and some parlor tricks suggests guilt, then let us all hang together! Fellow, we look for news of Sherfield. Would you know of any troubles down the road that might explain their silence?"

[JNAProductions]

Sarissa sighs. I know, it's not nice to suspicious, but he looks like some kind of undead, for the sake of the gods! But... He did give his word. That is enough for me.

[Gluteus_Maximus]

The man stands up fully, his 9-foot tall form towering over all of you. He walks over to Erevan, and says "I have harmed... Many in the past. You know nothing of suffering, Elf." He taps Erevan's forehead.

Spoiler: Erevan

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You see a vision. A forest burning, people screaming, you powerless. The cloaked man appears in the fire, and says "Stay out of my way."

[2D8HP]

Erevan


So you are Death?

[JNAProductions]

Erevan


So you are Death?

If he is, he coulda just said so. It wouldn't be the first time we've met.

[Sicarius Victis]

"While I can't say that I particularly trust him, if he meant harm to us I suspect he could have already done it by now.

Appearances aren't everything."

Spoiler: OoC

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Do we have an OoC thread for this yet?

[herodofcows]

Corbin shrugs at these proceedings, unsure whether he should be readying for a fight or for a game to save his soul.

"Well sir, be you Death or god or mighty mage, can you tell us what awaits down the road? Does something trouble Sherfield?"

[Gluteus_Maximus]

"Silence. You are all impolite to your elders. I will answer to this fine half-elvish gentleman. I just went through Sherfield not more than 3 days ago. I would not know why they would not have sent what these merchants seek." He looks up, as if he heard something. "Be wary. There are wolves in these woods, though I will not help you fend them off."

[Gluteus_Maximus]

He looks at Arkhen, and says, "Indeed. I could have wiped you off of the face of the earth if I wanted to. I just won't."

[JNAProductions]

So why ARE you here?

[Gluteus_Maximus]

"I am only here because I have been held up by you and your group, martyr. If one was to be so KIND and POLITE as to give me DIRECTIONS to the nearest town, then I would not have been here for so long!"

[JNAProductions]

Capable of killing us all... But not getting a map?

Anyway, we're heading to the next town over ourselves. Join us, then, Sarissa says.

[Gluteus_Maximus]

"ARGH! Are you incapable of listening, woman!? I have already been to Sherfield, small-mind! I am headed to whichever town you band of insignificant miscreants came from!!!" His horse whinnies.

[herodofcows]

Corbin inclines his head smartly at this, radiating smugness.

"Thank you very much for your time, good sir. We shall trouble you no further. The nearest town is . . ."

As he sketches out directions towards the nearest town, Corbin eyes the horse and rider in search of any telltale signs of magical identity or power. Politeness hardly precludes curiosity, after all . . .

Spoiler: OOC

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Since our DM is doing the rolls, can I make an Arcana check to see if I can get any kind of skinny on this guy and any magical ability he might have?

[JNAProductions]

"ARGH! Are you incapable of listening, woman!? I have already been to Sherfield, small-mind! I am headed to whichever town you band of insignificant miscreants came from!!!" His horse whinnies.

Aw, isn't he cute when he's mad? Sarissa says, laughing openly. To answer your question, though, yes, sometimes.

[Sicarius Victis]

"You know, I was considering telling you where we came from, but now that you're being unnecessarily impolite, I'm beginning to change my mind."

[Agrudez]

Aelar, seeing the commotion, decides to casually stride up to the group, plucking soothing notes on his lute and humming a tune as he does.

What seems to be going on here? I seemed to have missed my invitation!

He looks up to see the very tall man glowering at most of the rest of the group.

Ah, a traveler. And a tall, mysterious and angered one at that! May I offer apologies for my, er, comrades? I've not known them long enough to speak for them perhaps, but pay that no mind. We seem to be heading this way and you seem to be heading that way, so I suppose it is inevitable for our paths to part. Perhaps at this very moment!

He bows to the traveler and walks off towards the direction the group had been going, with very little pause in the tune he had been playing.

[Gluteus_Maximus]

"Excuse me!? I'M being impolite!? You little whipper-snapper! When you've been alive as long as I have, you'll see that you want people to be POLITE to you too!"

[JNAProductions]

"Excuse me!? I'M being impolite!? You little whipper-snapper! When you've been alive as long as I have, you'll see that you want people to be POLITE to you too!"

I'd hope when I'm as old as you are, I'd learn to let the little things slide.

[Gluteus_Maximus]

"Little things!? You have no idea the magnitude of my quest's importance."

Spoiler: Corbin's Arcana Roll

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(1d20+3)[6] Corbin cannot sense a limit to the man's magical power, though he has a constant magical aura of some sort. The horse has nil magic, except that it is bound to appear in a certain plane if it dies.

[JNAProductions]

"Little things!? You have no idea the magnitude of my quest's importance."

Spoiler: Corbin's Arcana Roll

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[roll0]

Which is exactly why you should be following the instructions that have been provided to you already rather than waste time berating us for being rude.