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2019-01-11, 12:22 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Apr 2011
- Location
- Someplace Nice
- Gender
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2019-01-11, 04:58 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Jan 2007
- Gender
Re: LGBTAI+ Question and Discussion Thread IV: [Citation Needed]
It varies, generally some flavour of gender non-comforming. This site has it labelled as "intersex" on your profile, which has attracted a not inconsiderable amount of criticism (which got roundly ignored). In general, assume that anyone that has it set as their gender symbol is probably intending to convey "other".
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Avatar by Rain Dragon
Wish building characters for D&D 3.5 was simpler? Try HeroForge Anew! An Excel-based, highly automated character builder. v7.4 now out!
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2019-01-13, 09:28 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Aug 2018
- Location
- Nice try FBI
- Gender
Re: LGBTAI+ Question and Discussion Thread IV: [Citation Needed]
Straight kid, but I have a few gay friends.
So one of my gay friends, is talking with a teacher, who has recently found out he’s gay. And I swear this is true, the teacher holds out a finger and a hole made by his pointer and thumb finger and says. P****, v*****. Some of the class laughs and my friend is humiliated.
My socially awkward butt is to shy to do anything, but I have a question should I have? And what can I do about it if not?
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2019-01-13, 09:37 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- May 2010
- Location
- Its Complicated
- Gender
Re: LGBTAI+ Question and Discussion Thread IV: [Citation Needed]
Something needs to be done to stop the supposedly responsible adult from bullying the kid. However direct confrontation with someone who has more power than you is not always a good idea. Is the principle or anyone else higher up in the chain or command sympathetic seeming? It might be possible to tell them and let them know that this teacher's actions are both bullying a queer kid and making you feel uncomfortable.
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2019-01-13, 11:03 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Aug 2007
Re: LGBTAI+ Question and Discussion Thread IV: [Citation Needed]
You should be supportive of your friend. In addition, depending on local laws, regulations and customs, you might be able to record the incident on your phone, and show it to people in positions of power that you expect will be receptive. Be aware that this might be against the law, or that there might not be anyone you can show it to with both the authority and will to do something about it (this includes everything from headmasters and parents to the local news station). Posting it to youtube has a small chance of working, but I wouldn't hold my breath.
But I agree with Recherché: don't confront an a-hole like that directly. It is unlikely to accomplish anything positive, and it has a non-insignificant chance of making things worse.
Grey WolfInterested in MitD? Join us in MitD's thread.There is a world of imagination
Deep in the corners of your mind
Where reality is an intruder
And myth and legend thrive
Ceterum autem censeo Hilgya malefica est
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2019-01-13, 11:31 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Apr 2008
- Location
- Greater London
- Gender
Re: LGBTAI+ Question and Discussion Thread IV: [Citation Needed]
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2019-01-13, 02:40 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Nov 2011
Re: LGBTAI+ Question and Discussion Thread IV: [Citation Needed]
I concur with the others; inform a relevant authority who's higher up than the teacher, like the principal. An alternative is to inform one of the guidance counselors (i'm assuming you have those, most places do), and request that the guidance counselor see that something is done about it. guidance counselor can help provide more anonymity for you if you're worried about backlash (and you tell them you'd prefer to remain anonymous).
A neat custom class for 3.5 system
http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=94616
A good set of benchmarks for PF/3.5
https://rpgwillikers.wordpress.com/2...y-the-numbers/
An alternate craft point system I made for 3.5
http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showt...t-Point-system
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2019-01-13, 03:55 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Mar 2016
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2019-01-13, 11:07 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Sep 2014
Re: LGBTAI+ Question and Discussion Thread IV: [Citation Needed]
If you're not sure about reporting it to the principal, you can also try talking to a different teacher about it if there's one you're pretty sure is a good ally. (If your school has some kind of LGBT club, whoever advises it would be a logical choice, at some schools teachers will put up "safe zone" signs, otherwise it's basically one of those things where you try to figure out from context and remarks.) Other teachers will probably have a reasonably good idea of your local school politics and may know how to better escalate this up the chain.
In an ideal world, absolutely any school adult would be a good person to report this to, but given that you've already got ample evidence, in the form of a school adult doing this in the first place, that this is not an ideal world, picking which staff member to report this to carefully is a reasonable precaution.
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2019-02-06, 08:06 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Jan 2012
- Location
- Alaska
- Gender
Re: LGBTAI+ Question and Discussion Thread IV: [Citation Needed]
Terminology/slang search for the LG types:
Trying to find a term for "someone you are attracted to who doesn't fit your normal gender preferences", eg. "I'm only attracted to men. And Sarah, for some reason.""We were once so close to heaven, Peter came out and gave us medals declaring us 'The nicest of the damned'.."
- They Might Be Giants, "Road Movie To Berlin"
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2019-02-07, 12:44 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Jul 2007
- Location
- France
- Gender
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2019-02-07, 08:09 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Mar 2006
- Location
- Germany
Re: LGBTAI+ Question and Discussion Thread IV: [Citation Needed]
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2019-02-08, 09:14 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Aug 2005
- Gender
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2019-02-12, 12:22 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Dec 2015
Re: LGBTAI+ Question and Discussion Thread IV: [Citation Needed]
Have anybody ever read the Book of The Underrealms series by Garrett Robinson? It featured so many LGBT characters in the series.
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2019-02-14, 06:48 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Jan 2019
- Location
- West Africa
Re: LGBTAI+ Question and Discussion Thread IV: [Citation Needed]
Hi, I posted here once as Flaming Eagle (now Cyber Punk, which will get merged with this account soon because I lost my password). When I last came here, I expressed my bicuriousness but lamented that I had no chance to explore.
I still have no chance to explore, but experiences I've had since then, especially with a rather twink-y guy I fell hard for, made me realize that yes I am bisexual, feminine preference.
Recently that fact sunk in, and as scary/exciting as it was, I've accepted it.
Now if I only had the chance to explore (where I'm from I'll become a pariah if word gets out).Last edited by Purple Eagle; 2019-02-14 at 06:48 PM.
Purple Eagle's character list
Love is the message.
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2019-02-14, 08:53 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Aug 2005
- Gender
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2019-03-28, 01:20 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Feb 2014
- Gender
Re: LGBTAI+ Question and Discussion Thread IV: [Citation Needed]
Spoiler: things of sexual nature that may not be legal in your countryI'm not sure if it's legal where you live, but if it is... Well, have you ever considered escorting? I really like certain sexual acts that most straight guys are not really intro and the ones that are don't look the way I like so I decided to just pay for it.
The guys I'm able to have sex with (Or just kiss and hang out) by paying are way prettier and hotter than any guys I'm able to find in a hookup app anyway, and way more polite. Sure the connection is not really the same but it's a safe way to explore and experiment without having to go through the hassle of dating or hookups.
You just call the handsome model like guy, book a place and pay for it. And you are able to anything you want wihtout fear of having to do soemthing he wants that you are not intro in return since you are already paying for it with money. Besides no risk of beign outed.
Be sure to be respectful and not rude with your escort, they are people doing a job and not objects.
Hey guys I would like to ask a question that may be kind of ignorant and I'm sorry.
But why nonbinary people care so much about names and gender documents? Isn't the whole point of beign nonbinary that you don't care? That you are above gender?
I have a friend who is nonbinary and they say they are not woman nor man and don't care about gendered things, they wear make up and pants and other days skirts and no make up. But they dislike their name becuase it's "male" but isn't the point of being nonbinary that you don't care about and have aspects of both genders?Last edited by S@tanicoaldo; 2019-03-28 at 01:23 PM.
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2019-03-28, 01:38 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Sep 2010
Re: LGBTAI+ Question and Discussion Thread IV: [Citation Needed]
No, the complete opposite, actually. I don't understand why, either, but each and every nonbinary person I have ever met placed an extreme importance on their gender identity and the pronouns other people used for them, even in their absence.
Confusingly, people who really don't much care what pronouns people use for them often self-describe as gender critical.
I know, one would expect it to be the other way round, but obviously, it's not.
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2019-03-28, 01:44 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Aug 2007
Re: LGBTAI+ Question and Discussion Thread IV: [Citation Needed]
As I understand it, non-binary includes both agendered and genderfluid individuals (which I'd imagine includes a significant chunk of individuals who don't care about gender as you are describing) and also other non-binary individuals, including agendered and genderfluid, who really do care that their gender doesn't match the one they were assigned (or indeed, feel they should't have been assigned one in the first place), and want to have legal enforcement of that difference so that others don't keep misgendering them (or telling them that "they have to pick" or the like). As well as others who are neither of the above. It's a broad description (wikipedia calls it a "catch-all category") for everyone that doesn't fit nicely into the man/woman labeling, so you get a lot of variation of opinion, position, etc.
So, in short, "some do, some don't, for reasons of their own".
Grey WolfLast edited by Grey_Wolf_c; 2019-03-28 at 01:52 PM. Reason: generalised
Interested in MitD? Join us in MitD's thread.There is a world of imagination
Deep in the corners of your mind
Where reality is an intruder
And myth and legend thrive
Ceterum autem censeo Hilgya malefica est
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2019-03-28, 01:51 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Apr 2006
Re: LGBTAI+ Question and Discussion Thread IV: [Citation Needed]
Not necessarily. Nonbinary is sort of an umbrella term; it's not a single gender identity so much as a collection of gender identities that don't fit into conventional categories. What you describe might be accurate for some nonbinary people, but definitely not all; for others it's just the state of their gender, and they care about it being recognized in the same way that you might.
Avatar by GryffonDurime. Thanks!
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2019-03-29, 11:42 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Jun 2017
- Gender
Re: LGBTAI+ Question and Discussion Thread IV: [Citation Needed]
As others have said, some don't care, and some do. As for why those ones care... well, think of it this way.
Nonbinary doesn't mean you don't care about the binary. It's sometimes a specific rejection of both options. While some feel they belong in all the categories (I think Genderqueer is one of the preferred terms there?), others feel they belong in none of them.
Let's say you're filling out a survey, and it asks if you're a Football Fan, or a Baseball Fan. Those are the only two options they offer on the survey. You don't care for sports at all, and as such don't want to pick one, but "none of the above" is not an option. You might feel penned in, because neither option works, neither is correct, and you're being forced to pick one.
Now take that feeling, and apply it to every aspect of your life, from your clothes to your name. Multiply it appropriately. You might understand why (some) nonbinary people really care about this.
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2019-03-29, 12:10 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Aug 2007
Re: LGBTAI+ Question and Discussion Thread IV: [Citation Needed]
This. My usual go-to example is hair colour. Imagine you live in a world in which can't rent a flat unless you fill out a contract (so far not unrealistic), and the contract requires you to state your hair colour (I hear in the US, eye colour is listed in the driver's license, which is a similarly weird thing to require, IMnpHO). Lying on the contract means you can be tossed out at any time, lose the deposit, etc. And imagine, further, that you have no hair and thus don't have a hair colour. What do you do? Lie? And risk massive penalties? Chose one at random, and potentially face a lawsuit? Not rent a flat?
This is a scenario that non-binary people face a lot in their everyday lives, for everything from rental agreements to opening bank accounts. In big and small ways, their lives are made harder because some bureaucracy didn't consider that sometimes people don't have a gender. And that's before we even get into bureaucracies that do consider it and politicians go out of their way to make the situation worse on purpose, because it'll get them a handful more votes.
Grey WolfInterested in MitD? Join us in MitD's thread.There is a world of imagination
Deep in the corners of your mind
Where reality is an intruder
And myth and legend thrive
Ceterum autem censeo Hilgya malefica est
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2019-03-29, 02:29 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Sep 2010
Re: LGBTAI+ Question and Discussion Thread IV: [Citation Needed]
The football - baseball example fits better. People do not inherently have a preference for football or baseball. Those sports are social constructs, and some people think they're both a bit silly, or like both. That's what gender identity is. (Except not quite, but that would get too much into real world politics)
The hair colour metaphor would work for biologial sex. There are some few people who have intersex conditions. This possibility is not considered in official documents, just as official documents tend to ignore that there might be someone who doesn't have any hair and never used to have hair and doesn't even have eyebrows. Because it is very rare for someone to not now what colour their hair would be if they hadn't shaved it off. Like, extremely rare.
People here claim that some nonbinary identified people don't care about pronouns and names and titles. But have any of you actually met such a person?
I never have. And I think it very unlikely that a person who doesn't care about those things would even tell you that they don't have a gender identity, unless you explicitly ask them.
I find baseball and football equally boring, but I certainly don't walk around telling people that. It's not interesting enough to talk about. Even my best friends could only assume that I probably find those two sports equally boring, as I have never shown an interest in either, and if someone tried to force me to watch one of them on TV, I would not tell them that I also find the other boring when refusing.
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2019-03-29, 03:17 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Jun 2017
- Gender
Re: LGBTAI+ Question and Discussion Thread IV: [Citation Needed]
Not in person, but an NB member of a podcast I listen to has "he/they/she" on their twitter profile, and no distinct preference. So these people are definitely around, even if they may be less common than those who do care.
But yes, because they don't have a strong preference, it's unlikely to ever come up in conversation. They also still go by their feminine birth name. They only chose to discuss it because they wanted to list pronouns on their twitter, and because the podcast started out described as an "all-lady D&D group", and they wanted to clarify that this wasn't quite true anymore.Last edited by ve4grm; 2019-03-29 at 03:22 PM.
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2019-03-31, 05:00 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Nov 2008
- Gender
Re: LGBTAI+ Question and Discussion Thread IV: [Citation Needed]
Nah, gender critical is pretty much solely an identifier used by transphobes. ;)
=====
You don't have to understand though, and trans people's experience of gender is as diverse as that of cis people, there's trans people that attach a lot of importance to labels and ones that attach less. One of my non-binary friends doesn't give a butt about pronouns. But legal recognition has societal power and comes with material consequences. (Just think about gay marriage debates... )
I'd like to point out though that it's way easier to not care about something when you already are represented. Same with how non-minorities often like to taut that they don't care about representation and just want the best actor or whatever.
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2019-03-31, 11:02 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Apr 2006
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2019-03-31, 01:09 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Dec 2015
Re: LGBTAI+ Question and Discussion Thread IV: [Citation Needed]
I have a question? What's non-binary?
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2019-03-31, 01:21 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- May 2010
- Location
- Its Complicated
- Gender
Re: LGBTAI+ Question and Discussion Thread IV: [Citation Needed]
People who's gender isn't exactly "man" or "woman." Some nonbinary people have no gender, some switch genders regularly, some are partially one gender partially another, some have even more complex situations going on.
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2019-04-01, 11:38 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Dec 2015
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2019-04-01, 11:57 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Mar 2009
Re: LGBTAI+ Question and Discussion Thread IV: [Citation Needed]
Last edited by Mystic Muse; 2019-04-01 at 11:58 AM.