Famous last words

[Green Elf]

I have 10 flasks of alchemis fire. Hahaha.

Don't worry, I'm the ranger, I shoot the bow.

Let's fight the rust monster!

What do you mean my weapon type isn't effective?

[LordEntrails]

Sure we can take the gems from the eyes of the statue. I mean so what if it's some god's idol?

[Misereor]

D&D

GM: "There's a big red X on the floor."
Player: "I go stand on it!"

GM: "The Repulsion spell pushes you off the cliff. It's a 200' drop to the lake below"
Player: "I cast Water Walking."

"Don't worry. I have Animal Handling."



Shadowrun

"I raise my head over the wall and take a peek."

"These Red Samurai aren't as tough as I thought they'd be!"

"A Roach Spirit? Ooooh, how scary! I step on it."



Warhammer 40K, Dark Heresy

"I tell the Commissar to <expletive deleted> my <expletive deleted>!"

"A female space marine? Hey sexy, wanna make out?"

"I didn't even know you could target an individual with an orbital bombardment?"



Call of Cthulhu

"AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!"

"It won't die! It just won't die!"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!"

[Goodkill]

it's just one army, then i'll have his cards!

(in a game of RISK; after i failed with overwhelming odds on my favor, the other superpower took his cards and proceeded to win the game)

[shawnhcorey]

"But you honour, it was self-defence. It's just that we shot back first."

PS: The party didn't die. We broke out of jail the night before our execution.

[Vinyadan]

"Weird, I don't smell anything."

[MrZJunior]

"You can't shoot me, I'm a federal officer!"

[Duskanor]

DM: Roll your spot checks
Me: (I roll a 20) Yes I got a 20! (I roll again and get a 12) I have a total 46!
DM: In the distance you clearly see 4 serpentine creatures flying in your direction
Me: OH MY ****ING GOD WERE DEAD

This actually happened, our whole party of 5 died except 2 people. I was one of the people who died, however I did get
resurrected.

[In4Dimensions]

I feel like I’ve seen you before...

[Shesalik]

From my MMO times:

"But you said you have a lot of them!" (to our healer about mana potions)

Rogue:"Even I can tank this one."

"I'll be AFK for twenty seconds what can possibly happen." (while minig in EVE Online)

[Misereor]

"But you honour, it was self-defence. It's just that we shot back first."

:)
Reminds me of Richard, the Lord of Dance. "It was SELF DEFENSE! That orphanage attacked ME!!!"

[Jay R]

"And I'd have gotten away with it, if it weren't for those meddling kids."

[Vinyadan]

"Change of plans: let's meddle!"

[CircleOfTheRock]

"Pffft, we don't need the manual anyway."

[IvorySongbird]

"The summoning circle isn't right? I'm a wizard, not an artist! What can possibly go wrong with a few squiggles in the line?"

[Ilmarë]

I'm going as a bard

That's a bit of a jump for you. You've only played fighters before.

How different can they be?

[Jay R]

"I rolled a one. Where's the fumble table?"

[Berenger]

Pointing at a random chest and exclaiming "Oh, look, a mimic!" in a sarcastic voice.

Needless to say, it was an actual mimic.

[Dante Daylight]

"maybe nerull need sacrifices" - after the young minotaur barbarian spoke those words he got posessed by an evil spirit (the group was passing a graveyard inside a doomed village, full of dark energies at this moment)

He suddenly cut the gray elf wizard in front of him in two halves and got struck down himself by my paladin who succeeded the listen check for the mentioning of the evil god of death but missed his spot check for the possession part (if I only had found any good reason to perform a sense motive check at this point ).

[Seventh Dwarf]

What's the worst thing that could happen?

[PunsAndDragons]

One player in our party took massive damage and had his arm hacked off...another player simply said, in a calm viice - “ooh, that has to smart!”

[Sinewmire]

My Paladin, Broseph, of the Knights of Bromania, upon encountering Cthulu:

"Detect Evil".

Turns out there was a rule for what happens if you're stupid enough to do that! Who knew?