Help me Save my Demon Lord Fiancee

[loki_ragnarock]

I don't think we have an officiator- it's only her law she cares about after all. I'm certainly not asking who objects and if she doesn't, nobody gets to.

You're going to want to rethink that!

Someone who can cast the level one spell Ceremony can net you both another +2 to AC. And a full +4 to AC between Ceremony and Shield of Faith should be enough to impact even your barbarian friend's smashing.

And since it's likely that you or she or both will be widowed by the end of it, you haven't even really prevented yourself from doing it in the future. Virtually zero opportunity cost.

And hey, if you're willing to exchange rings along with vows, Warding Bond between you and her courtesy of your casting stone can net her another +1 to her AC and resistance to all damage. I mean, you'll be taking damage, too, but she's sitting on a +5 AC... +6 if you can manage a platinum ring of protection as the spell component, which I'd argue is more valuable than 50gp.
Flavorful and cheesy.

+6 to AC should be swingy enough to count as a decided advantage for your lady love. The barbarian will still hit since he’s got something like a +16-17 to hit and at will advantage, the paladin will still hit at least once with GWF, but everyone else should have a significantly harder time of it.

Such is the power of an enduring commitment.

If you can feed her a potion of speed, that’s another +2AC; that’s the power of an enduring commitment and an open bar at the reception. Or the ceremonial drinking from the chalice during the actual wedding. Planning the ceremony as a covert way to stack a metric ton of buffs into a short time seems like a decent way to go about it, actually. People in the pews might be questioning why drinks take such a prominent place in this religion; it’s tradition to drink from a chalice with a potion of speed and another with a chalice of heroism. If anyone questions it, pull out your phone and let Tevya explain it.

Hmm, if only I could find a way to be Ethereal as well, be handy for an emergency healing session.

Oil of Etherealness.

I know I’m bringing up a bunch of random items, but you’ve got 100+ days on a countdown timer to mention this stuff to the DM or otherwise seek it out. Your lady can go ethereal, has a genius intellect, and telepathy; I'd assume you guys are basically conspiratorial half smiles at all points in time as you reconnoiter with none the wiser.

You guys are a pretty cute couple in my mind's eye.

I don't have hex unfortunately,

That’s fine. It's better than fine.

At warlock 5th you might have something far better: Fear.

This is part of why I brought up your rival paladin as the prime target; his aura basically frees people from what is one of your best available crowd control effect. The barbarian is immune regardless, but everyone else? Would they plan to prepare for it when you just got the ability and never advertised it?

Look, I don’t think you can stop the barbarian. His strength is too high to entangle, he’s immune to fear and charm, he’s resistant to damage and probably has a ton of hp, and has a viable ranged attack with a dwarven thrower. Killing the paladin knocks out the other heavy hitter and frees you up to throw down fear against everyone else. IE, the best you can do is isolate him and control for the others, and laying down Fear can keep them at bay for a few rounds at least.
About the only angle for directly occupying him I can think of is illusion spells; clever uses of phantasmal force or silent image might occupy him for a little while, as I have a sneaking suspicion that the guy with a 29 strength may not have the best int score. But neither you nor she has access to any of the useful illusion spells.
Hold Person might be the only thing you could access that would actually effect him, but with extremely limited spell slots you’d have to be pretty confident it was the right way to go. If it works, your lady love might get to auto crit a few times, or you could simply do him no damage nor allow him to attack for a round, ending his rage and leaving him to deal with the effects of exhaustion.

… somehow stealing his belt of strength Brunhild style might be in the cards if you want to even this out? But even with it, his damage potential when targeting your lady love is leagues behind the Paladin’s. He’ll hit nearly every time, but he’s not going to be taking a third to a half of her hitpoints by himself in a round the way the paladin will.

So yeah, kill the paladin, debuff everyone else; your love can probably take the barbarian in a one on one fight, and you have it within your power to potentially make it a one on one fight... or at least a one on fewer fight. You’ve got some options, albeit most of them consist of sticking near her and taking the dodge action after throwing down a concentration effect.

I think Unoriginal's on to a good argument as to how destabilizing the soul economy might be a great way to dissuade you ally/foe, but when he probably doesn't see reason...

[SociopathFriend]

You're going to want to rethink that!

Someone who can cast the level one spell Ceremony can net you both another +2 to AC. And a full +4 to AC between Ceremony and Shield of Faith should be enough to impact even your barbarian friend's smashing.

And since it's likely that you or she or both will be widowed by the end of it, you haven't even really prevented yourself from doing it in the future. Virtually zero opportunity cost.

I have been convinced that we absolutely need a priest. I cannot rely on the party Cleric though as he stands firmly in the "kill demon" camp.

If you can feed her a potion of speed, that’s another +2AC; that’s the power of an enduring commitment and an open bar at the reception. Or the ceremonial drinking from the chalice during the actual wedding. Planning the ceremony as a covert way to stack a metric ton of buffs into a short time seems like a decent way to go about it, actually. People in the pews might be questioning why drinks take such a prominent place in this religion; it’s tradition to drink from a chalice with a potion of speed and another with a chalice of heroism. If anyone questions it, pull out your phone and let Tevya explain it.

I do have two potions of invulnerability but that's the beginning and end of my potion stores. Nor am I likely to get a chance to shop again.

Oil of Etherealness.

I know I’m bringing up a bunch of random items, but you’ve got 100+ days on a countdown timer to mention this stuff to the DM or otherwise seek it out. Your lady can go ethereal, has a genius intellect, and telepathy; I'd assume you guys are basically conspiratorial half smiles at all points in time as you reconnoiter with none the wiser.

You guys are a pretty cute couple in my mind's eye.

I somewhat doubt the DM is going to have the Demon Lord go shopping and lacking followers is kind of one of Zuggtmoy's main problems in the first place.

That’s fine. It's better than fine.

At warlock 5th you might have something far better: Fear.

This is part of why I brought up your rival paladin as the prime target; his aura basically frees people from what is one of your best available crowd control effect. The barbarian is immune regardless, but everyone else? Would they plan to prepare for it when you just got the ability and never advertised it?

I'd have to get two levels prior to the wedding- which means everyone else does too. I need to kill time so they stay at 11. Leveling up absolutely does not benefit me at this point. I get one level. The party gets five or more depending on how many people show up. Zuggtmoy's already going to have max HP (we all do) and otherwise will grow no stronger at all.
On the plus side the enemy casters cannot be within range of his aura without being way, way too close to the fight, they'll hang back and fight from afar which means they'll get no benefit at all from his aura. Or, they'll be right up on him and that's literally 10 feet away from the front line.

So yeah, kill the paladin, debuff everyone else; your love can probably take the barbarian in a one on one fight, and you have it within your power to potentially make it a one on one fight... or at least a one on fewer fight. You’ve got some options, albeit most of them consist of sticking near her and taking the dodge action after throwing down a concentration effect.

I think Unoriginal's on to a good argument as to how destabilizing the soul economy might be a great way to dissuade you ally/foe, but when he probably doesn't see reason...

Yeah, I need to see what a good buff/debuff to stick in that 3rd slot gem would be. If the Druid falls to Charm then I don't have to worry about 8x Dispel.
I'm pretty sure I can get any Wizard spell stuffed in there since we'll probably pass by the one uber-Drow wizard on the way to the wedding. Slow would be hella useful- so would Enlarge actually. Adding 1d4 to her attacks would be very useful in the long run given the stone can't fail concentration and in addition it prevents the Barbarian from using his superior strength to grapple her via being 2 sizes larger.
Alternatively, if I could give Zuggy the rock during the ceremony, SHE could have a buff directly centered on her like Spirit Guardians that would make the melee line's life... well- hell. It lasts for 10 minutes too so 10 rounds (1 minute) in when the other buffs and abilities wear off (enjoy your exhaustion Berserker)- SG will still be going strong.

DM did admit Zuggy could hear my prayers, so that is nice.

[loki_ragnarock]

DM did admit Zuggy could hear my prayers, so that is nice.

Oh.

Oh. Oh. Oh.

You're fine, then.

I'd have to get two levels prior to the wedding- which means everyone else does too. I need to kill time so they stay at 11. Leveling up absolutely does not benefit me at this point. I get one level. The party gets five or more depending on how many people show up.

100+days on a counter makes that unlikely; it's a third of the adventuring days required to get from 1st to 20th level. Even if you dragged your feet maximally, two levels seems like the best case limit. So, yeah, drag your feet, but anticipate a few levels between now and then.


Which isn't all bad. In fact, this might be your greatest advantage. See, you're the dude on the inside. You know their strengths. You know their weaknesses. You know who the real challenges in your group are.
And you, Mr. 20 Charisma, just "lost" your rod of resurrection.


You have an ethereal, genius, telepath who knows whatever you want to tell her. And you aren't the only one who she can ethereal, genius, telepath to. Every encounter from here to there? Those monsters act with advance knowledge of what's coming; when, how many, who, their strengths, their weaknesses, their vices, and their virtues, their equipment, their abilities. All appearing in a zephyr whisper in their minds in advance of your coming. All told that the paladin on the back row is the least of their worries; the paladin that positions himself just slightly less optimally than usual, the paladin that engages the enemy with slightly less gusto than in the past.

How many monsters, mages, and mighty men between now and then might disintegrate a cleric if informed in the right direction? How many might pile on to a parallel paladin? How many might reward the entity that provides such valuable information?


Every encounter from now till then is:
1. Hard Mode.
2. An assassination mission.
3. An opportunity for your lady love to cultivate allies, boons, trinket, or information. All of which can pass on to you at her choosing.


For the next hundred days, you can expect to go down the list of your "allies" in encounter after encounter.

Damned inconvenient that it should happen after your rod disappeared, eh?


All you have to do is think. Even in the event that someone casts detect thoughts in just the right moment and actually passes your save, the only explanation you need to give is that your character - traumatized by all the difficulties you've faced in the last few weeks - is constantly reevaluating the tactics and strengths and weaknesses of the group to try and optimize their outcomes. I mean, who wouldn't be? In the face of the cleric's recent disintegration, who wouldn't be mentally auditing their tactics constantly? Who wouldn't be wondering about what sort of effects a recently acquired oil of sharpness might have on the next set battles? Who wouldn't be privately thankful that the barbarian has a belt of giant strength and would thus be largely immune to strength based effects... and who wouldn't quietly wonder if an illusion might entirely mitigate him for a combat?


It isn't just the fight at the wedding. It's every fight between now and then.

The leveling up is inevitable. The cast of opposition and the insane magic items at their disposal are not. After all, should the barbarian or paladin fall, maybe you could step up to fill his role in the party should that belt make it's way to you? You aren't greedy, of course, only suggesting it for the things that'll make you better at protecting your allies. And that belt (or whatever actually catches your fancy) might be the thing that keeps someone from dying next time... but that also pulls you out of your normal role of protecting the flank, leaving it exposed for the next set of encounters. No matter where you go to fill in (the front line is going down recently, I need to step up because they need it), there really is just one of you to go around (gah, stepping up to the front line means the druid was killed this encounter) and that can't help but be "frustrating" for you, as even unintelligent monsters fight you with a tactical acumen that would make Sun Tzu shamed. And that can only lend greater weight to your arguments to slow down and make sure that you're all properly prepared for what's coming... and maybe level a little slower by extension.

The world is your burrito, brother. Bite into it.

[Zanthy1]

One thing I would recommend is talking with the DM privately, and possibly even showing him this thread. Some of the ideas here are amazing, but if the DM peruses through he can come up with a mishmosh of what he likes. If he is looking for a way to make this game so much more exciting and memorable, he'll at least want you to have a chance at thwarting their ideas, or even doing it.

[SociopathFriend]

100+days on a counter makes that unlikely; it's a third of the adventuring days required to get from 1st to 20th level. Even if you dragged your feet maximally, two levels seems like the best case limit. So, yeah, drag your feet, but anticipate a few levels between now and then.

It's the Out of the Abyss campaign module. It can easily take weeks to get from one location to another due to the difficult terrain plus just the length of travel time. I think even the most efficient route through the Maze alone is still a week or two for example.
Also at the time of writing this (not in the maze yet) we are down to 78 days and have not even seen major combat in 20+ days. We've stopped doing random encounters just for the hell of it because we level via milestones/Demon Lord defeats now and it's a waste of time.

You have an ethereal, genius, telepath who knows whatever you want to tell her. And you aren't the only one who she can ethereal, genius, telepath to. Every encounter from here to there? Those monsters act with advance knowledge of what's coming; when, how many, who, their strengths, their weaknesses, their vices, and their virtues, their equipment, their abilities. All appearing in a zephyr whisper in their minds in advance of your coming. All told that the paladin on the back row is the least of their worries; the paladin that positions himself just slightly less optimally than usual, the paladin that engages the enemy with slightly less gusto than in the past.

How many monsters, mages, and mighty men between now and then might disintegrate a cleric if informed in the right direction? How many might pile on to a parallel paladin? How many might reward the entity that provides such valuable information?

All of the bigger threats already know what we do and how we do it. Grazzt in particular was clever enough to manipulate both Paladins away from a majority of the party before busting out the charms and succubus because he knew their chances of avoiding charm without us nearby was drastically lowered.

The leveling up is inevitable. The cast of opposition and the insane magic items at their disposal are not. After all, should the barbarian or paladin fall, maybe you could step up to fill his role in the party should that belt make it's way to you? You aren't greedy, of course, only suggesting it for the things that'll make you better at protecting your allies. And that belt (or whatever actually catches your fancy) might be the thing that keeps someone from dying next time... but that also pulls you out of your normal role of protecting the flank, leaving it exposed for the next set of encounters. No matter where you go to fill in (the front line is going down recently, I need to step up because they need it), there really is just one of you to go around (gah, stepping up to the front line means the druid was killed this encounter) and that can't help but be "frustrating" for you, as even unintelligent monsters fight you with a tactical acumen that would make Sun Tzu shamed. And that can only lend greater weight to your arguments to slow down and make sure that you're all properly prepared for what's coming... and maybe level a little slower by extension.

The world is your burrito, brother. Bite into it.

It's technically very much not. At this point we level up via milestones or defeat of large-scale boss. I could very easily get the entire party to end up fighting at the exact same level they are now purely by arguing that Teleport is being abused and they should read the spell. A few misdirected landings and boom- an entire month is gone just walking to get back where we want to be.

Also given how at least four different members are now packing Raise Dead scrolls, I doubt anyone is going down and staying down without a significant battle against a powerful enemy. Now if we find said enemy and somehow coming back isn't on the table (falling into lava's a big one) I'm perfectly fine with that sort of thing but we simply have too much healing for someone to effectively stay dead without massive casualties.
Other Paladin- Revivify
Warlock- Revivify
Cleric- Raise Dead
And that's without the scrolls passed out to other members. Now granted the DM might retcon that because I don't know if the Cleric actually followed the rules for making those things (for example I don't think he had like 6 grand in diamonds) so if that's the case we're much better off.

One thing I would recommend is talking with the DM privately, and possibly even showing him this thread. Some of the ideas here are amazing, but if the DM peruses through he can come up with a mishmosh of what he likes. If he is looking for a way to make this game so much more exciting and memorable, he'll at least want you to have a chance at thwarting their ideas, or even doing it.

Currently he's already agreed to look over a list of ideas for how becoming Zuggtmoy's Consort might power me up so I'm focused on that. I've made a list of various things of different power levels to see what he likes.

Spoiler: The list- I wouldn't get ALL of them just probably 1-3

Show

Lesser Buffs Worth approximately less than a level-up
Resistance to Poison damage
Immunity to Poisoned condition
1/day being able to cast one out of the following spells without any components: dispel magic, ensnaring strike, entangle, plant growth, ray of sickness
You no longer age. You are immune to any effect that would age you, and you can't die from old age.


Medium Buffs Worth approximately as much as a level-up
+2 Charisma
Immunity to Poison damage and Poisoned condition
Resistance to all non-magical weapon damage
1d8 poison damage added to every melee attack
Whenever making an attack action, the first melee weapon against an opponent forces them to make a Constitution save or else be Poisoned for 1 turn
+1d10 HD
1/day can cast three out of the following spells without any components: dispel magic, ensnaring strike, entangle, plant growth, ray of sickness
Gain one additional spell slot of the highest level spell slot you possess at this time- this slot can be of any class
As an action against a plant you can touch it to absorb hitpoints from it up to a maximum of 3x your Charisma score per day
20 feet Blindsight


Greater Buffs Worth more than a level-up
Gain the plant-type instead of humanoid
+40 hit points
15 feet True Sight
Can cast each of the following spells once per day without any components: dispel magic, ensnaring strike, entangle, plant growth, ray of sickness
A number of times per day = to Charisma modifier you can add 2d8 poison to a melee attack after a hit is confirmed
1/short rest as an action, creates a spore cloud 15 feet in radius that lasts for 1 minute, all flesh and blood creatures within the radius at the start of their turns or entering the cloud on their turns take the caster's Charisma modifier in damage per round
1/short rest as an action, creates a spore cloud 15 feet in radius that lasts for 1 minute, all creatures within the radius at the start of their turns must make a Wisdom saving throw or be charmed by the caster or Zuggtmoy similar to her own ability

Giving me the plant-type alone would be invaluable since I basically get an extra turn every round under Zuggy's lair actions and she could simply channel her spores through me. "Oh sorry- was the back-line hanging back expecting +5 to their saves against the spores that they thought they were out of range of? Oops."

[Magikeeper]

So, you've alluded to the party not being all that loyal to each other, and more specifically not liking the druid. They also have few attachments to the world aside from the more faithful ones as far as I can tell.

Therefore.. can't you just convince one or more of them to:

A) Switch sides.
B) Stay out of the fight.
C) Play both sides - As long as they use a less effective strategy (e.g. "No Pixies") you and yours will aim to knock them out instead of killing them and/or raise them if they do die, and you'll owe them a similar favor if Ziggy survives.

(A) would depend on inter-party rivalries. Sure, they want to kill Ziggy but it's also a chance to finally off the druid! Or a chance for the druid to ensure someone will be behind them 100% when the rest of the party finally snaps~

(B) Likely depends on if you can bribe them well enough, and should require they come up with an excuse to not even be on the battlefield to avoid last minute betrayals.

(C) has a good chance of working, given the impression I've gotten of this party. Unless, I suppose, they can't keep secrets - but that could also be used in your favor.

Might not even need to promise an extra favor beyond getting the rezzed if they die, really.

[SociopathFriend]

So, you've alluded to the party not being all that loyal to each other, and more specifically not liking the druid. They also have few attachments to the world aside from the more faithful ones as far as I can tell.

Therefore.. can't you just convince one or more of them to:

A) Switch sides.
B) Stay out of the fight.
C) Play both sides - As long as they use a less effective strategy (e.g. "No Pixies") you and yours will aim to knock them out instead of killing them and/or raise them if they do die, and you'll owe them a similar favor if Ziggy survives.

(A) would depend on inter-party rivalries. Sure, they want to kill Ziggy but it's also a chance to finally off the druid! Or a chance for the druid to ensure someone will be behind them 100% when the rest of the party finally snaps~

(B) Likely depends on if you can bribe them well enough, and should require they come up with an excuse to not even be on the battlefield to avoid last minute betrayals.

(C) has a good chance of working, given the impression I've gotten of this party. Unless, I suppose, they can't keep secrets - but that could also be used in your favor.

Might not even need to promise an extra favor beyond getting the rezzed if they die, really.

A) As much as they do not like one another in-character, the meta-caring has ensured they will not really kill one another nor really fight. The ones most hating of other members are also the ones who are most adamant about killing Zuggy and have the most potential to do so.

B) I've nothing to bribe them with. I never had much money in the first place and what little I had I spent on potions and Winged Boots.

C) Truth be told after seeing the Paladin and Barbarian attempt to beat on the Gnoll Demon Lord in the labyrinth today, my biggest threats are the two I simply cannot sway or really trick outside of the contract. Everyone else is so much ineffective that honestly I expect without either of the Paladins helping them or the Barbarian- they'll simply die or otherwise fail to lesser threats. Offering resurrections is all I have and it's no good as we've abundant options for that. I have no tools to bargain with.

They generally do not dislike one another. This is very much a Paladin/Paladin/Barbarian party with us providing a majority of the action. The Paladin and Barbarian are the ones that routinely hate on everyone else for being less effective (only the three of us plus the Cleric and DM are over 25 while the rest of the players are still in high school) That said, I can point out with some sincerity that I am the only one who has never threatened to murder them and does not constantly insult their intelligence or abilities... except if the 4 or 5 players that rarely show up do so for the wedding I don't even have that.


At least I finally got the Barbarian to start taking a Bonus Action to Rage. He'd not been doing that the whole campaign and that's one less attack on round 1 of battle that I have to deal with. And I got the other Paladin to learn Heavy Armor Master doesn't apply to magical damage.
The most likely line-up is:
Conquest Paladin (smites)
Berserker Barbarian (hits really hard) though I have a feeling I can nerf him because I'm damn-sure he has no reason to hit as hard as he does on a thrown hit without criting.
Life Cleric (Lots of healing)
Divine Warlock (Eldritch blasts and healing)
Necromancer Wizard (Honestly fireballs and that's it)
Druid (Wild Shape and summoning help)

[Magikeeper]

If you actually win everyone else will likely be unconscious or dead, which is where them having a deal ahead of time to survive if the party fails would be useful. Many of the members have basically no pasts or outside attachments, right? Their only allies are in the party.

But if you think the druid and such are irrelevant, or at least so weak it won't matter if they are intentionally pulling their punches, what if you took the initiative to invite more guests to the party (like other demon lords)? Or used the definitely-a-traitor-fighter to make the party think more guests are being invited by talking about all those new invitations. Since they metagame you might be able to trick them by acting like more guests is a sure thing even if the in-game evidence is largely non-existent. Maybe ask the DM questions that imply you're setting up some kind of horrifying meat grinder. The goal would be to convince the main trio that even showing up to the wedding is suicidal.



That said, the racing plan could be your best bet. In fact, just add that to any other plans you do. Whatever resources they use to chase after you are resources they're not using in the fight. Is tiring out the main trio a possibility? Exhaustion would hit them pretty hard. Main flaw in that plan, however, is that you might run into something along the way. Could Zuggy have some minions scout out a reasonably safe path for your mad dash?

[SociopathFriend]

@Unoriginal
Also sorry but this is absolutely the song that's going to play at the wedding once the metaphorical feces hits the fan and people start choosing sides and screaming nasty words like, "Traitor, genocide, chaotic, evil, mothereffing demon lords, kill you, no brother of mine, I trusted you" and so on.

If you actually win everyone else will likely be unconscious or dead, which is where them having a deal ahead of time to survive if the party fails would be useful. Many of the members have basically no pasts or outside attachments, right? Their only allies are in the party.

But if you think the druid and such are irrelevant, or at least so weak it won't matter if they are intentionally pulling their punches, what if you took the initiative to invite more guests to the party (like other demon lords)? Or used the definitely-a-traitor-fighter to make the party think more guests are being invited by talking about all those new invitations. Since they metagame you might be able to trick them by acting like more guests is a sure thing even if the in-game evidence is largely non-existent. Maybe ask the DM questions that imply you're setting up some kind of horrifying meat grinder. The goal would be to convince the main trio that even showing up to the wedding is suicidal.

Just to be clear he's a Rogue and he may or may not be a traitor. He hasn't shown up for several sessions and so I cannot plan around his help one way or another. That said, that does sound like a good ending to the, "You should side with me because I'm not an evil abusive ass" speech. I'm evil mind you- just not evil towards the party.

"So let me end with this- if you help me or don't interfere at all- I'll resurrect you if I win and you've died anyways. For those of you who signed away your souls- this is kinda useful don't you think? Not going to hell? If you aid those trying to hurt me or hurt me yourselves- you're dying and staying dead or worse."

Who'd have thought a year of the Barbarian ripping on the mages for not being good with spells or the Paladin blatantly trying to get their souls might benefit me?
Hell, I could point out they could still even do the ritual if they wanted, my love for Zuggy is eternal and might as well start with the basics; booting Juiblex's slimy bum out of our layer of the Abyss. Getting us both banished isn't the worst outcome- our love being ended before the wedding is.

That said, the racing plan could be your best bet. In fact, just add that to any other plans you do. Whatever resources they use to chase after you are resources they're not using in the fight. Is tiring out the main trio a possibility? Exhaustion would hit them pretty hard. Main flaw in that plan, however, is that you might run into something along the way. Could Zuggy have some minions scout out a reasonably safe path for your mad dash?

Oh it's definitely good because I just realized the Druid would just call horses again and horses don't have Darksight. They can have torches all they want- I'd fully argue with the DM that a full-speed chase in the dark twisting Underdark should have a massive possibility of crashing your mount and I bet you I'd win that argument.
I'm already perfectly willing to start lying to my party about the wedding date and I'll even write the wrong day on my character sheet in case they peek at it.
I'm not really sure what would catch me tbh. With Expeditious Retreat there's no normal enemy that's going to keep pace with my mount (120 feet per round is some serious mileage and I can heal any damage he takes from attacks of opportunity) and if they become too much trouble the DM has already ruled in the past Earth Elementals can carry you through the rock with them so I can burrow instead of go overland (4x crystals that summon those) and an hour of that should shake off any pursuit. With some rule diplomacy I can even point out in emergency situations my mount can get me 120 feet and then I myself can fly off onto the ground and take off running myself for additional movement.

IF the Rogue is with me, which I may message him about privately instead of at the table, I could almost certainly have him steal the one teleportation scroll they might have or in some way ruin it. I just need to make sure I have proof that even if he's not at the table- his character isn't going to help the rest of the party. So far as I'm aware, the party doesn't even have the location marked on their maps but I'm definitely not sure how far that argument will go. Zuggtmoy marked it on my map yes, and the DM pointed out the Rogue should know of the location as they're one of Zuggtmoy's wedding party. But if the Rogue doesn't show up to help the party and only I have that information- they'll never find the place anyways.

[Digimike]

Zuggtmoy having truesight doesn't mean her minions do and Pixies can fly plus constantly have superior invisibility on.

Pixie invisibility requires concentration on the pixies part. Meaning if they use their 1/day polymorph that breaks the invisibility. Or if they turn invisible after the poly, the concentration on polymorph breaks.

[SociopathFriend]

Pixie invisibility requires concentration on the pixies part. Meaning if they use their 1/day polymorph that breaks the invisibility. Or if they turn invisible after the poly, the concentration on polymorph breaks.

Druid failed to mention that. I don't think it was malicious on his part I think he just didn't realize it.
Though I'm not worried about polymorph anymore. I literally can't fail a DC12 Wisdom save. Charisma +5, Proficiency +4, Wisdom +2, and then a minimum of +1 for rolling. That threat has ended to me.

Though I think we can win a 2v2 or 2v3 against the Paladin, Baelrbarian, and Cleric.
Zuggy's max hp is 448. Doubled thanks to the potion is 896. I have up to 5 heal spells with the rod, which is 350 doubled to 700 more hp. I can make her very hard to kill.

[SociopathFriend]

Update on the Consort Idea List. This is the finalized result. Note this is a list of possible ideas- obviously not all would be gained

Spoiler: Consort to the Demon Queen

Show

Possible Appearance Alteration Ideas
Crawling Arm
~One of your arms has manifested your connection to the Lady of Fungus. Mushroom growths have sprouted along the limb, issuing fragrant odors and swaying in a wind that nobody can see or feel.~

Eerie Eyes
~Sometimes when others look into your character’s eyes, they receive the unnerving visual of something moving behind them, a stirring that is not quite expected or natural. At times your irises (if you possess them) also seem to change shape to resemble the poisonous patterns of certain mushrooms.~

Rotted Flesh
~Your skin has begin to rot and decay, though not as if an undead. Your wounds still heal as normal but wherever the damage was located will instead begin to grow fungal growths as though it were dead.~

Ichor
~No longer does your blood, if you possess it, resemble the normal mortal hue. Instead whenever your blood is drawn or your body damaged it instead looks as though the juices of poisonous plants and the insides of your skin look and feel like the inside of mushroom stalks.~

The Toad
~A natural mushroom cap begins to form atop your character’s head. While your hair continues to exist as normal, the cap grows over it to create a cap that extends a foot in every direction past the crown of your skull.~

Possible Stat Alteration Ideas
Condition/Status Related
~As the bound Consort to the Queen of Fungus, poison in all its forms finds it more difficult to inflict harm. Through special new growths in your body- many poisons and other mind-altering afflictions have begun to lose power over you.~

• Advantage on Saving Throws against Poison
• Immunity to Poisoned condition
• Resistance to Poison damage.
• Immunity to Poison damage.
• Immunity to Charmed condition.
• Advantage on Saving Throws against Frightened
• Immunity to Frightened condition.
• Replace your existing type with Plant-Type.

Stat Related
~As the bound Consort of a Demon Lord, you have gained a new force of personality that few can boast of possessing. Fiendish vigor rushes through your body and continues to supply you with the power and ability to find, battle, and defeat enemies- both yours and hers.~

• Gain an increase of 2 points to your Charisma score even past 20.
• Gain 25 Hit points.
• Gain an additional HD of your highest value (1d0) plus your Constitution modifier in additional health points. Unlike normal HD, this one will be available every short rest.
• You no longer age nor will age-affecting afflictions work on you.
• You regain 1 hit point every 6 seconds, automatically stabilizing you if you fall below 0 hit points once per day.
• Gain truesight up to 30 feet.
• Gain truesight up to 10 feet.
• Gain the ability to see through illusions if they’re within 15 feet of you.

Possible Ability Alteration Ideas
Spell-Related
~As the Bound Consort of a Demon Lord, the magic that flows through you is no longer strictly your own, but an extension of Zuggtmoy’s will and power.~

• Gain one new spell slot of your choice at the highest level you already possess (2nd)- this spell slot can be used for spells from any class and restores itself on a short rest.
• Once per long rest you can cast one out of the following spells without any components: dispel magic, ensnaring strike, entangle, plant growth, ray of sickness.
• Once per long rest you can cast three out of the following spells without any components: dispel magic, ensnaring strike, entangle, plant growth, ray of sickness.
• Once per long rest you can cast each of the following spells once without any components: dispel magic, ensnaring strike, entangle, plant growth, ray of sickness.
• Three times per short rest, you can change one instance of damage from a spell you cast to poison instead of whatever type it usually is.
• Three times per long rest, you can change one instance of damage from a spell you cast to poison instead of whatever type it usually is.
• Three times per long rest, you can force any number of creatures you’ve dealt damage to with a spell in a single round to make a Constitution saving throw or be poisoned until the start of your next turn.
• If an enemy humanoid has advantage to the saving throw you force them to make with a spell- once per long rest you can force them to have no advantage on it.
• If an enemy humanoid has advantage to the saving throw you force them to make with a spell- once per short rest you can force them to have no advantage on it.

Feature Related
~Due to your status as being the bound Consort to the Demon Queen Zuggtmoy, her powerful will and influence have reached even the magical and martial portions of your being, altering and enhancing them beyond what they once were.~

• Whenever you hit a creature with a melee weapon, the creature takes an extra 1d8 poison damage.
• Whenever you hit a creature with your pact weapon, the creature takes an extra 1d8 poison damage.
• As a bonus action you can create a Pseudopod and make a melee attack with it using your spellcasting stat (Charisma) to calculate to hit and damage. You are proficient in attacking with this Pseudopod and it deals deals 1d8 bludgeoning damage plus 1d8 poison damage. You can apply the Charisma damage to one type of damage of your choice but not both.
• A number of times per day equal to your spellcasting stat (Charisma) modifier when you smite a creature, you can add 1d8 additional poison damage and force them to make a Constitution save or be poisoned until the start of your next turn.
• Once per day, you can touch a plant and replenish your Lay on Hands pool by draining the life from it, regaining up to your Paladin level x 3 points of the pool.
• Once per long you can release a cloud of spores in a 15 foot radius sphere for 1 minute. Whenever you hit a creature with a melee weapon within this sphere they take an additional 1d8 poison damage.
• Once per long rest as an action, you can create a spore cloud 15 feet radius sphere around yourself that lingers for 1 minute. All flesh and blood creatures within the radius at the start of their turns or entering the cloud on their turns take 2d8 + your spellcasting stat (Charisma) modifier in poison damage.
• Once per long rest as an action, create a spore cloud 15 feet in a radius around yourself that lasts for 1 minute. If Zuggtmoy is within 300 feet of you, this cloud functions identically to the cloud she produces for the Infestation Spores ability and she can use it as such.
• Once per long rest as an action, create a spore cloud 15 feet in a radius around yourself that lasts for 1 minute. If Zuggtmoy is within 300 feet of you, this cloud functions identically to the cloud she produces for the Mind Control Spores ability and she can use it as such

.

[SociopathFriend]

Update. Had a moment to speak with the Rogue player about the wedding in private when everyone left the game store to smoke- his exact words were, "Well my job is guarding you so I suppose I'm for it."

Not the most ringing endorsement but it's more than I have from practically anyone else. At this point I'm fairly confident I can Diplomancy my way out of conflict at the wedding. If nothing else because the Barbarian has multiple times said he hard-stops at slavery and... well it's pretty easy to point at the Lolth-Worshipping Drow and mention they're Evil Slavers that routinely wipe out entire families including the children.

[Max_Killjoy]

Well, this promises to be some honeymoon, but I'm not sure which of you is going to end up "bearing fruit".

[SociopathFriend]

Well, this promises to be some honeymoon, but I'm not sure which of you is going to end up "bearing fruit".

I am somewhat entertaining the idea of running a future campaign as offspring

[Digimike]

This really has been some fun reading. It's too bad you all aren't doing this in a similar manner to the Godsfall podcast.

[SociopathFriend]

This really has been some fun reading. It's too bad you all aren't doing this in a similar manner to the Godsfall podcast.

Given that half the group are minors- I don't entirely see that being something we could do without a lot of potential problems.

I might pitch the idea to the store owner (the other Paladin) that he might try just getting a recording of game sessions in other campaigns just to see if it's amusing. Being able to post audio recaps of what occurs on the store's Facebook page could be quite useful in terms of showing what happens at the store to potential customers.

[SociopathFriend]

Well it was said keep updated...

Spoiler: Out of the Abyss spoiler

Show

All of our magical items have been destroyed

At this point Zuggtmoy and the wedding are something of a second worry

[Max_Killjoy]

Well it was said keep updated...

Spoiler: Out of the Abyss spoiler

Show

All of our magical items have been destroyed

At this point Zuggtmoy and the wedding are something of a second worry

Just put replacements on the gift registry.

[Unoriginal]

Well it was said keep updated...

Spoiler: Out of the Abyss spoiler

Show

All of our magical items have been destroyed

At this point Zuggtmoy and the wedding are something of a second worry

Great news for you, it means most of the team can't hurt Zuggtmoy in any significant fashion, and now they need a powerful backer.

[SociopathFriend]

Great news for you, it means most of the team can't hurt Zuggtmoy in any significant fashion, and now they need a powerful backer.

Yep yep. The DM actually let me wiggle out that I could resummon the Pact Weapon I had bonded (which I said was the +1 Longbow instead of the Rod since I technically think that's cheap and I certainly don't think of it as a weapon) so I have the lone magical weapon at the moment.

In addition if they decide to go back to the surface to get magic weapons (which I'm quite sure they don't have funds for exempting the other Paladin) then I'm parting ways because we'll never make it to the wedding on time.

[sithlordnergal]

So, question: You said you're a Paladin of Vengeance, yes? What are the other players playing? If you're a Paladin/Warlock, you should be able to handle most threats pretty easily. Even if those threats are party members. Also, keep in mind that your Paladin auras affect allies and enemies...meaning if the party is your enemy, they deal with your dangerous auras, while Zuggtmoy can be protected by them

[SociopathFriend]

So, question: You said you're a Paladin of Vengeance, yes? What are the other players playing? If you're a Paladin/Warlock, you should be able to handle most threats pretty easily. Even if those threats are party members. Also, keep in mind that your Paladin auras affect allies and enemies...meaning if the party is your enemy, they deal with your dangerous auras, while Zuggtmoy can be protected by them

No. I am a Paladin of the Ancients/Hexblade Warlock.

Spoiler: The Rest

Show

Tiefling Paladin of Conquest
Half-Orc Berserker Barbarian
Dwarf Moon Druid
Elf or Half-Elf Moon Druid (Barbarian's girlfriend who is not likely to act on her own)
Human Healing Cleric
Aasmir Divine Soul Warlock or whatever the equivalent is for Warlock
Rogue- not sure what kind

Actually I'm not too worried about combat by now. My, "This is why you should listen to me" speech has only gotten better now that not listening to me has literally cost all of our magic items (which honestly might well be half a million gold in total) and in a meta-sense has most definitely robbed us of two levels because the Maze Engine solved two Demon Lords with zero effort on our part.
At this point the party really has no in-character reason to doubt me minus the newcomer who replaced the party-killed Necromancer: I've consistently made the right calls that were ignored, my reasons for doing so involve the destruction of a slave-making genocide-condoning religion, I've not once hurt someone for no reason, and I've always tried to help them even if they screwed me.

We're also dreadfully short of finances to get magical weapons and armor to buff us up to the proper state to fight regular opponents much less Demon Lords. The DM is likely to throw some bones our way mind you as a party full of level 11 characters without any magic items, or indeed regular items given that most of them now have no armor or weapons in the first place, is looking at a helluva steep climb against even normal battles.

On the upside, the Maze Engine upped my Charisma up to 22.
On the downside, it killed the Necromancer that teleports everyone around and, of course, took all of our magical items. Well the engine didn't kill him but he was hitting buttons and the party interpreted that to mean he did it so... the Rogue shot him a few times, I may have hit him once (with Booming Blade to tell him to hold still, I even warned him not to move, I healed him too mind you) and then he mouthed off to the other Paladin who promptly threw him back into the pit of lava.

[sithlordnergal]

Oh, well with a group that size even a PAladin/Hexblade would have trouble...but seeing as you guys lost all your magic items and the party is willing to listen to you now, you may not need to fight.

[SociopathFriend]

Oh, well with a group that size even a PAladin/Hexblade would have trouble...but seeing as you guys lost all your magic items and the party is willing to listen to you now, you may not need to fight.

Honestly we're probably not fighting. And even if we do- I have no idea what the math involved is but everyone collectively likely lost far more from it than I did. Which means Zuggtmoy is much better off than she was previously given that two other Demon Lords are off the table and we gained no levels from it.

In addition, the DM has stated once we finish Out of the Abyss, we have the option of porting our characters to another campaign; so the group is likely to care a lot about potential deaths now.

But in all honesty- I've legit reasons to perform the act and the kicker is I'm not even going to stop them from casting the ritual. Why would I? It'll just draw all the Demon Lords to Menzoberranzan- exactly where I want them going.

[SociopathFriend]

Presumably last update.

The party and myself have parted ways. They're off to go deliver the final ingredient for the ritual and I was forced to head in the opposite direction to make it to the wedding. We seem to have parted on good terms, surprisingly. I don't think they realized the ritual means the Demon Lords attack the Drow city no matter what.

My Rogue handmaiden has been hit with Gromph's Imprison spell and nobody in-character has the slightest idea where she went or how she left. She dead for all practical purposes.

We got a few magic items, mainly uncommon stuff. I personally got back my Winged Boots because fighting from beyond melee-range is just too useful. I think the Barbarian got magic and even if he didn't his GF is a Druid so she'll just make him have magic.

[Unoriginal]

Well, be sure to tell us how you help destroying the drow city alongside your wife.

[SociopathFriend]

Well, be sure to tell us how you help destroying the drow city alongside your wife.

Given that we'll be sharing the city with: Demogorgan, Grazzt, Orcus, and Freezeblue, I don't predict survival or us being the biggest problem.

[SociopathFriend]

For the last and final update I'd like to make sure to thank anyone who offered help during the events of this thread- but the campaign is over.
The results? We'll call it a draw.
Fair warning- I'll be spoiling several parts of the campaign so if you care- stop at the surviving party members and read no farther.


As it stands the surviving party members are:
Aasimar Blessed Soul Warlock
Dwarf Druid of the Moon
Human Life Cleric
and your boy- the Ancient Paladin Hexblade Drow
-

The Rogue is technically 'alive' but is Imprisoned in a gem in Gromph's study- which we did not retrieve as between everyone assembled nobody had the slightest clue in-character what happened to her and we didn't want to poke around his study as it had already caused great mischief at the time and harmed a lot of us. Not to mention that cursed Maze Intelligence check...

As for the rest- a brief bit of backstory.
The background I had involved being present at the war between Drow and Dwarf at Mithral Hall. I had an 86 fame roll for that so whatever I did- people noticed. A male Drow showing that sort of initiative was not to be left alone and I was executed and left for dead when they retreated. The background stated Eilistraee saw the potential for light and saved me. For the interlude between the war and the start of Out of the Abyss, I stayed with Eilistraee followers but never really was 'with' them. They sang, they danced, they were happy in the light but I was not- for I resented Lolth and her followers. So when Demon Lords showed up I set off hoping to not only prevent them from harming Eilistraee's people but maybe, just maybe, turning some of that ire onto Lolth.



Cut to today.
I had split with the party to make it to my wedding on time. Through the use of teleportation they went to Whiteplume mountain and grabbed Blackrazor as we'd had it before in the previous timeline so they knew exactly where it was, though ultimately it had been cast away by the Tiefling Conquest Paladin when facing a Beholder because it was controlling him to attack the party back then. Blackrazor in-hand, they encountered Fraz-Urb'luu who decided to teleport them all to the wedding.

It was then revealed to us all that various Demon Lords and even Deities actually loved the idea of Zuggtmoy marrying me as that would strengthen/create bonds between Eilistraee and Zuggtmoy while weakening Lolth. "The children from this union of Zuggtmoy and Eilistraee will begin the new army that would bring down Lolth."

Now for more backstory, the DM has a past character from Horde of the Dragon Queen called, "Princess" who is a tricked-out level 20 Rogue with all the wealth of... well- Horde of the Dragon Queen. Plus she stands very high in the Zhentarim as well. The Tiefling Conquest Paladin and the Half-Orc Berserker Barbarian both owed her a favor for services provided earlier in the campaign and received a letter from her stating that they must prevent the wedding from occurring which is why they teleported to go get Blackrazor since they knew the wedding was only in one or two days.

So when the wedding rolled around and it came time for the, "I do" the Tiefling Conquest Paladin drew Blackrazor and smote Zuggtmoy as hard as he could while the Warlock blasted her from afar and the Druid turned into a Constrictor Snake and attempted to grapple. The Barbarian meanwhile was running around punching whatever he could in the crowd.

And so, I cast Command on the Conquest Paladin (with my Charisma of 22 at level 11) which he failed as I didn't exactly consider him an ally at the time. I commanded him "throw" and pointed to the chasm the wedding took place in front of. So he threw Blackrazor into the depths of the earth. The party kinda lost their minds at that point as aside from that their magical weapons were a +1 Maul and a +1 Axe or hammer- whatever the Barbarian had, along with my own +1 Bow.

And then the ritual went off and everyone of us and every still-present Demon Lord spawned in Menzoberranzan. They had their great Demon Lord melee and Demogorgon was the only one left standing after snapping Orcus' neck and sending his staff flying away. Demogorgon then looked at us and decided we were going to be his next targets.

Everyone reacts differently to impending death:
I flew away while casting Mirror Image
The Conquest Paladin charged Demogorgon (fairly sure he hated me enough that he just wanted to die)
The other Warlock flew away and started spamming Eldritch Blast
The Cleric attacked with spells like Blade Barrier
The Druid did something to warrant Demogorgon deciding to target him first even with the Paladin smiting him, I forget what spell he used
The Barbarian ran off to grab Orcus' staff as he (for some reason) just now questioned whether he was a Dwarf and was going to fully embrace is Half-Orc heritage in hopes that Orcus would allow him to wield the staff and defeat Demogorgon. The entire campaign he insisted he was a Dwarf because he'd grown up with them.

In the same order:
I tried buffing a few party members before realizing what the Barbarian was doing and tore off after him
The Conquest Paladin was taken down again and again before finally falling too far dead to get back up
The Warlock stayed away sniping while Demogorgan planted his tendrils firmly up the colons of the meleeing party members
The Cleric started spamming every healing ability he had
The Druid ran away because Demogorgon almost killed him and then proceeded to cast Call Lightning and then later Cloudkill on Demogorgon
The Barbarian reached Orcus' staff, touched it, and suffered the consequence of dropping dead on the spot at full HP

And then the battle concluded:
I was face-to-face with an undead Barbarian with Orcus' staff in-hand and so I lured him back to Demogorgon
Conquest Paladin at this point was dead and staying dead
The Warlock had been drawn via Telekinesis to Demogorgon, who was happily sitting in Cloudkill and using him as a punching dummy
The Cleric was down at that point but not dead
The Druid was... I believe turned into a T-Rex and attempting to fight Demogorgon in melee after the entire table telling him to turn off Cloudkill because it was hurting the party members
And upon arrival the undead Barbarian used Power Word Kill on Demogorgon- who had 95 hit points.

That was the abridged version of the battle anyways- it took more than 3 rounds since it lasted long enough the Conquest Paladin wasn't able to be Revivified.
So it's over. I'm alive, the Druid, Warlock, and Cleric are all still alive.
The Barbarian is dead and in whatever good afterlife he went to in order to see his beloved again.
And the Tiefling Paladin is in hell getting screamed at by Asmodeus because all the souls he'd collected belong to Zuggtmoy now per the DM ruling.
We'll not be using these characters any farther but the DM did pointedly tell me we are still married so my next step is getting a ticket to the Abyss. After that- who knows?

[Unoriginal]

Well, that's what youn call a wedding and quite a few burials.

Thanks for sharing!