Borderlands ( August 2024)

[The Glyphstone]

Does anyone have hopes that this won't be hot garbage? It's still a couple months until we start seeing preview trailers, but between the reshoots/director swap (never a good sign), the questionable casting, and video game movies in general still struggling in general with the exception of Sonic, its not looking great. Cate Blanchett is a bit too old to be a good Lilith, Kevin Hart is a bit too short to be a good Roland, and Jack Black is a bit too Jack Black to be a good Claptrap. I can see Jamie Lee Curtis pulling off Tannis, and I don't know enough about the rest of the cast to judge. The only silver lining I can find is that they dodged the auto-fail of directly adapting the game plot, but that's a pretty low bar to cross.

[HolyDraconus]

Does anyone have hopes that this won't be hot garbage? It's still a couple months until we start seeing preview trailers, but between the reshoots/director swap (never a good sign), the questionable casting, and video game movies in general still struggling in general with the exception of Sonic, its not looking great. Cate Blanchett is a bit too old to be a good Lilith, Kevin Hart is a bit too short to be a good Roland, and Jack Black is a bit too Jack Black to be a good Claptrap. I can see Jamie Lee Curtis pulling off Tannis, and I don't know enough about the rest of the cast to judge. The only silver lining I can find is that they dodged the auto-fail of directly adapting the game plot, but that's a pretty low bar to cross.

The (new!) Mario movie did well also, enough so that it could be taken as a sign that the hex is gone. I never had high hopes for it, it feels a bit like Defiant, but they could play it off as a more comedy than anything else.

[The Glyphstone]

https://discord.com/channels/2871152...55747769745418

Trailer dropped. My expectations were apparently lower than I realized because this isn't completely awful. Cate still looks way too old for Lilith though, and the pee gulch joke doesn't instill me with hope on the humor.

[Manga Shoggoth]

Oh, I don't know... I agree with the bit about Lillith, but the humour bar in Borderlands was never exactly highbrow. The rest of it looks quite good, even if Claptrap is a little more useful than usual. I might even be tempted to go to the cinema for this one instead of waiting for the DVD.

[Rynjin]

I expected nothing and this is still worse. The casting alone is irredeemably bad* (Kevin Hart as Roland is a literal meme), but nothing else is good either lmao.

*Exception: Jamie Lee Curtis as Tanith is pretty much perfect.

[ArmyOfOptimists]

I initially had revulsions to the casting choices, but then I watched it again and it somehow makes it funnier. This is Borderlands, a stupid universe about silly people living violent, dumb lives. It's almost deliberately miscast so you're on board with the stupid from scene one. Except the guy playing Krieg. That's spot-on.

Also the movie almost looks like a "family road-trip gone horribly wrong" plot. Roland and Lilith as the parents, Krieg and Tina as the kids, Tanith is the family grandma, and Claptrap is either the pet or the kids' weird friend that got pulled in. Based on this, I'm expecting absolutely nothing but the tone of the games to carry over.

[Psyren]

I'm iffy about Kevin Hart too, but Cate Blanchett, Jamie Lee Curtis, and Jack Black give me hopes that this will achieve Jumanji levels of elevating the source material. (And hey, Kevin Hart was in that too.) So put me in the "optimistic" column. We're in a bit of a video game movie renaissance at present in any event, and this one actually has a decent story.

[Callos_DeTerran]

This looks like the best effort from writers who got five minutes to look at the Wikipedia page for Borderlans, haha. I'm baffled about certain decisions like this being the group we're following (Lilith and Roland make sense), why Jack Black is voicing Claptrap, and...actually no, the casting as a whole just feels off aside from Krieg who looks the part...but if he doesn't spout violent nonsence while having a sane inner voice, then its...not Krieg. Also, where's Marcus at to tell us a story?

That said the set design and such looks like, turning it into a weird family road-trip style movie...COULD work, there's interesting and funny things you could do with that cast of vault 'hunters', and it's got the right tone of humor, so hopefully its got better quality jokes up its sleeves.

[Manga Shoggoth]

If they are going to do Marcus in the trailers, I suspect he will be in the longer one rather than the teaser. This trailer just needs to assure us that the place looks OK (I think it does - I can recognise nearly everything in the backgrounds), and that we have some decent actors who will be able to deliver (and it isn't that bad so far).

I don't think the things that really mire the film (especially bad writing) will show up much at this stage. (If it's bad enough to show up at this stage then you know the film is going abundently dire...)

[Trixie_One]

Desperately, desperately needed some better music.

The opening to Borderlands 2 isn't all that great, but that it's set to Short Change Hero makes it one the best game openings ever.

[The Glyphstone]

At least the entire internet seems to be in agreement with me about Idris Elba being a great Roland. Maybe he cost too much money.

[Keltest]

At least the entire internet seems to be in agreement with me about Idris Elba being a great Roland. Maybe he cost too much money.

He may just be busy. Isnt he doing Sonic 3 and the Knuckles series?

[Rynjin]

At least the entire internet seems to be in agreement with me about Idris Elba being a great Roland. Maybe he cost too much money.

That and the script for this movie looks lazily adapted from an existing roadtrip comedy template and Kevin Hart comes pre-baked into those like the watermark on free software.

[The Glyphstone]

He may just be busy. Isnt he doing Sonic 3 and the Knuckles series?

Oh yeah he is voicing Knuckles isn't he. That's also plausible, with the third option being he valued his dignity too much to be associated with this.

[GloatingSwine]

Oh yeah he is voicing Knuckles isn't he. That's also plausible, with the third option being he valued his dignity too much to be associated with this.

Nobody who was in CATS can be realistically said to value their dignity.

(This movie finished shooting three years ago, they've been sitting on it ever since. That is probably not a good sign.)

[Errorname]

Borderlands is a weird franchise for me. It came out at a time when shooters were utterly dominated by boring realistic military games and also when I was a kid, so I have a lot of nostalgia for it and some actual fondness for it, but I don't actually think it's very good? Certainly not something I'm too eager to revisit.

At least the entire internet seems to be in agreement with me about Idris Elba being a great Roland. Maybe he cost too much money.

Even if you can't get Idris, there is no shortage of talented character actors who would do excellent work as no-nonsense military guy playing straight man to a bunch of crazy weirdoes, it would be very easy to cast this role more conventionally. If they didn't want Kevin Hart specifically, they wouldn't have him.

[The Glyphstone]

Yeah. The only cast member who seems to be accurately channeling their character in the trailer is Tina. I can totally see "You said minimal explosions!"" coming from her in a game, though "I said no explosions!" would probably be from Mordechai.

[Trixie_One]

Borderlands is a weird franchise for me. It came out at a time when shooters were utterly dominated by boring realistic military games and also when I was a kid, so I have a lot of nostalgia for it and some actual fondness for it, but I don't actually think it's very good? Certainly not something I'm too eager to revisit.

I was thinking about this yesterday. The more I considered it, the more I came to the answer was that the music in the previews sold the hell out of the intended mood, and that Gaige was a legit excellent character design. Easily the best thought out looter shooter character with her talents I've seen who was just an utter joy to play. Her close enough and anarchy stacking was so, so much fun and engaging. Add her mech and you've get a taste of the co-op experience without needing to put the time/energy investment of getting other people to play with you.

Even with the Gaige factor though the writing was very much wearing out it's welcome by the end of 2. Without Gaige, and after seeing those incredibly obnoxious previews, you'd have needed to pay me to play 2.5 and especially 3, and it would have been pretty dang expensive for me to be willing to do so.

[The Glyphstone]

To compound the cast disappointments, no sign of Mr Torgue, though they apparently found the time to cast Jakobs and Atlas.

[Manga Shoggoth]

To compound the cast disappointments, no sign of Mr Torgue, though they apparently found the time to cast Jakobs and Atlas.

The only person loud enough to play him is BRIAN BLESSED, and awesome though he is, I don't think he really fits the part.

[The Glyphstone]

Yeah, Brian does bombastic, but I dont think he'd be able to channel Torgue's brand of profane insanity. Plus he's almost 90 years old...but that didn't stop them from casting Cate or Jamie.

[ArmyOfOptimists]

The only person loud enough to play him is BRIAN BLESSED, and awesome though he is, I don't think he really fits the part.

I feel like Brian Blessed actually has too much gravitas to play Torgue. You need someone from the WWE or its like with that kind of manic, self-promotion energy.

[GloatingSwine]

You need Terry Crews.

[Rynjin]

Now that would have been good casting, yeah.

Or hell, you could probably CG a ridiculous muscled giant body onto Chris Rager himself and just have The Champ reprise the role.

I'm also a bit surprised they didn't cast Dave Bautista to play Brick...and instead seemed to have just left Brick and Mordecai out entirely.

Well, not too surprised I guess, given the rest of the casting.

[Infernally Clay]

The only person loud enough to play him is BRIAN BLESSED, and awesome though he is, I don't think he really fits the part.

The only person who should play Torgue is the guy Torgue is based upon - Hulk Hogan.

[Rynjin]

The only person who should play Torgue is the guy Torgue is based upon - Hulk Hogan.

The issue is Hulk Hogan is about as good of an actor as he is a person.

[The Glyphstone]

Yeah, the best you can say about Hulk's film career is So Bad It's Good.

I know he's overused as hell and has basically zero range, but you could use The Rock for Brick. How much range do you really need to play Brick, anyways? He's huge and likes punching everything.

[Lemmy]

I had zero interest in this when I saw the trailer... And it's pretty much the definition "I expected nothing and I'm still dissppointed".

The casting alone is so bad you can almost see the stamp of "movie made by AI / corporate comitee".

[Infernally Clay]

The issue is Hulk Hogan is about as good of an actor as he is a person.

Torgue doesn't exactly need Joaquin Phoenix to play him. Dude just stands there yelling out cheesy one liners and bragging about how awesome he is, which is pretty much all you could expect from Hulk Hogan anyway.

[Rynjin]

Yeah, the best you can say about Hulk's film career is So Bad It's Good.

I know he's overused as hell and has basically zero range, but you could use The Rock for Brick. How much range do you really need to play Brick, anyways? He's huge and likes punching everything.

I could just as well never see the Rock's face again TBH.

Torgue doesn't exactly need Joaquin Phoenix to play him. Dude just stands there yelling out cheesy one liners and bragging about how awesome he is, which is pretty much all you could expect from Hulk Hogan anyway.

You'd be surprised how easy it is for a bad actor to mess up even simple roles.