"4e is all cliches, anime and MMO!"

[Tengu]

Spoiler

Show

At the end of each of *your* turns you roll 1d20. If you roll 1-9, you fail the check, if you roll 10-19, nothing happens, if you roll 20, you can spend a healing surge which gives you as much HP as if you were at 0. Three failed rolls and you die.

[AmberVael]

Akane was in bad shape, and she knew it. Backing off to stand next to her bookish companion, she activated her magic to heal herself.

Spoiler

Show

Move straight back 6, and then use Second Wind for more healing.

This encounter is going very badly...

[NEO|Phyte]

Ultair

Someone was having some truly cruddy luck in terminating meatbags, and they weren't overly happy about it. Luckily, there was still a few chances at stabbing something. Namely, the pair of beetles. He moves around to the southwest side of the nearest beetle, making a pair of attacks that would hopefully leave it open for a counter-counterblow.

Spoiler

Show

Move 5 squares to the SW side of the beetle that would be flanked if Lemon was up, avoiding threatened squares, Sly Flourish (dex vs AC)
attack - (1d20+6)[12]
damage - (1d6+6)[11]

spend my action point for a standard action, and Riposte Strike (dex vs AC)
attack - (1d20+6)[26]
damage - (1d6+3)[9]
:edit: oh ow, max damage on the High Crit roll (lets just use the damage roll for that, since the crit is automaxed anyway, amirite?)
If this hits, and the beetle attacks back next turn, I get an immediate interrupt Str vs AC (+5) attack that deals 1[W]+str (1d6+2) damage.

If I somehow manage to drop one of the beetles with my first attack, the second attack goes to the second.

[Terraoblivion]

Akane-senpai was hurt, the crazy guy in armor as well but who cared about him? She had to defeat the beetles, she could not let Akane-senpai down. Making her way over the corpse of the ogre she ran to the most distant beetle, to use the opening that the robot guy had made to get some good blows in and finish it off.

Spoiler

Show

What i do is use my full movement to reach the square two squares below the left most beetle and then use deft strike to reach the square to the lower left of it, so i flank it with Ultair. At least i think i understood it so i would flank it if i stand there.

Attack (1d20+10)[16]
Damage (1d8+5)[9]
Sneak Attack (2d8)[5]

Then if it is still standing i burn my action point to use piercing strike against it.

Attack (1d20+10)[14]
Damage (1d8+5)[8]
Sneak Attack (2d8)[6]

[Azerian Kelimon]

Inspired by Lemon's words, the blow the fells him hits Johnny as if he had been the target. Screaming to his teammates, his instructions are nearly incomprehensible: Everyone, kill those goddamn beetles, NOW! We have to rescue Lemon!.

With a roar of rage, he then proceeds to unleash attack after attack on the mysterious girl, as he inadvertently switches languages to spanish (Possibly to dodge censorship from the Big Metal Hand in the sky): ¡Putita malnacida, voy a cortarte a pedazos con mi espada!

Spoiler

Show

The ranger ph34rs the cascade of attacks that's going to fall down on the girl.

OA: (1d20+7)[18]
OA damage: (2d6+4)[15]

Viper's Strike: (1d20+7)[27]
Damage: (2d6+4)[11]

AP fueled Warlord's Favor, consider it a Xenogear's Deathblow: (1d20+10)[11]
Damage: (4d6+4)[21]

Hopefully, that'll be enough to down the girl and get back to Lemon next turn.

Edit: The dice favors me. A crit and a likely hit for high damage, this girl is going down like the Titanic. Pity the "deathblow" missed, but hey, it was pretty superfluous. I just hope that girl can make a pair of saves against death, because I'm dieing to play good cop on an interrogation.

[Tengu]

Akane recovers 7 HP.

The rain of blows Ultair and Yuri land on the beetles turn them into reddish-black paste, with some crunchy bits inside - a delicacy in some parts of the world, for sure.

Johnny's furious attacks knock the girl back (although the last one didn't connect, annoyingly), a trail of blood flowing from her forehead.
"Aah, that hurts! I will let you go this time, but it won't be so easy when we meet again!"
She suddenly disappears in a puff of smoke. Strangely enough, this doesn't provoke an attack of opportunity.

Victory! Everyone gets 106 experience points. If anyone decides to search through the corpses, they will find these items:

Spoiler

Show

36 gold pieces.
A note that says "For your convenience most of the sums you will find will be dividable by 6" - it turns into dust after reading.
Ogre-sized clubs.
Ogre-sized primitive leather armor.
An intricately decorated rapier.
A healing potion.
Playogre - the newest issue of a popular ogre magazine.

[ExHunterEmerald]

"This has gone on long enough."

The thus-far-fortunate wizard steps up and to the right two spaces before letting fly with a barrage of projectiles, individually easy to dodge, but together forming eye-catching patterns that serve to distract from the task at hand.

Spoiler

Show

Magic missile on the marked beetle.
Int vs. Ref - (1d20+4)[20]
Damage - (2d4+4)[9]
Also, methinks I should have taken thunderwave.

EDIT: Whoops, timing.

Patchouli takes a moment for a few deep breaths before examining the items gathered.

...With a slight eyetwitch she mage-hands the Playogre into the air and blasts it to cinders with a ball of flame.

[Azerian Kelimon]

Rushing back to his fallen comrade, Johnny picks him up as he forces a smile.

Wake up, little sunshine. This is not going to be your last battle for the Emperor!

((Healing word, to maximize the bonus from recovery and so making healing surge expenditure smaller.

Roll: (1d6)[3]))

Continuing with his façade, he turns off the rapid shredding of "Stand up and Shout", still thundering, and changes it to a merry victory tune, as he spins his sword around and sheathes it, assuming a heroic pose for a few seconds.

Yes! Victory is ours!


Then, he turns around and starts honouring the most ancient tradition of heroes everywhere: Search the fallen bodies of your enemies for loot.

Finding the potion and rapier, he hands the first one to Akane. Next time you feel like playing monster magnet, down this one, he says, as he stick his tongue out at her like this.

Then turning to Patchouli, he gives her the rapier. Could you please take a look at this thing to see if it has some magic in it? If we're going to be facing this kind of resistance, we'll need as much magical power as we can get.

Walking towards one of the trees from which the ogres emerged, Johnny exclaims: If anybody needs me, I'll be scouting the place. Take a breather while I'm at it, people. You seem to need it.

However, as soon as he gets behind the tree, he starts shuddering uncontrollably and twitching, as if he had been hit by a color spray again. That was too close. Far too close. Lemon could have died there, and I could have gone permanently blind from another lucky spray.

What the hell did we get ourselves into? This is too big for us. We're going to bite the dust.

I wanna go back home. I'm tired of this ****ty world! I don't want to die, and I want my mom back! I want to go back, goddamit! He says as he hits the tree with his fist, breathing very heavily and very rapidly.

Easy now, boy. You're stuck in here. Calm down. You're supposed to be the hero. They can't see you crying. There. Now, let's go back to them. Exiting from the other side of the tree, he loudly proclaims: The coast is clear! We wiped the all out!

[Terraoblivion]

The battle was over. They were safe. All of them were, looks like even the guy in the weird mechanical armor was fine. But Akane-senpai was hurt, what if the wounds were infected and she was going to die of a fever. She could not let that happen, she had to do something.

"Akane-senpai are you alright?" blushing as she spoke she used as small a voice as possible as she addressed the eladrin. What if she had not done enough and Akane-senpai hated her now? But she was the only one to try and look at the wounds afterwards.

And no matter what she had gotten a glimpse of Akane-senpai through the artistically arranged cuts in her outfit. Her blush grew deeper as she admired the eladrin, she had no right loving something that beautiful. A plain girl like her, but on the other hand the other options Akane-senpai had were worse. That silly king who was way too feminine to like girls? The murderous robot? The guy who went on and on and on about the importance of suffering? The kid who kept referring to geeky music? The girl in the frumpy dress? And none of those loved Akane-senpai as she did anyway and the first girl always wins anyway. So she had to be the one who got Akane-senpai's love in the end.

[Oslecamo]

It was all geting dark around him...Was this really his last battle? Would he get to see the Emperor again at least? But then he saw a faint light. He felt himself floating torwards it. Yes, it was the Emperor, waiting for him, calling for him...He strecthed his arms, trying to reach him

Your holyness, I'm here...

And then he saw Johnny's face.

What the...Ok, ok, let go, I'm fine. Where are the foul heretics we must kill? Who recquires my aid?

Then, looking around, he realizes the battle has ended. He goes around the battlefield shooting the dead bodies just to make sure they're finished.

Is there any injured? I'll treat your wounds in return for your bravery in this battle. Ah, it has been sometime since I had such a challenging oponent. But don't let your guard down, brothers and sisters, that foul chaos sorceror may come back any time. And let this serve you as a lesson, the ruinous powers of chaos hide verywhere, so it's better to shoot first and ask questions later, and also...

He then starts a long epic boring speech wich will make the party wonder if it was worth saving him.

If by any chance he sees the playogre magazine he will do it's best to cut it into pieces with his chainsword while mumbling something about foul mutant writings.

Now, let us make haste, brothers and sisters! We must go and kill, I mean, meet whatever's his name that King Julius told us to meet! ONWARD! TO GLORY!

Spoiler

Show

Ooc:
I'll use my own healing word to patch myself up further up. Is there anyone else who needs healing? My healing word allows you to gain the most of you surges, since I add my wisdom and 1d6 to the HP gained.

(1d6+3)[6]

[Tengu]

For convenience, here are your current HP and number of used healing surges:

Spoiler

Show

Patchouli, Ultair, Yuri - full health, 0 used
Johnny - 21/22 HP, 1 used
Akane - 12/31 HP, 2 used
Lemon - 21/27 HP, 2 used

[AmberVael]

Akane accepted the healing potion, her head held low as she heard Johnny's words. Slowly she sat down and looked around at everyone, then back to Johnny.
"I will be more careful next time." She said quietly.
Then Yuri spoke and made her jump, as she had barely realized the other girl was there. The eladrin gave Yuri a friendly smile and smoothed out her hair a little bit, which seemed completely unaffected by the fight. No doubt her clothing too would go back to normal as soon as the attention was focused elsewhere.
"Oh, you startled me! I'm fine now, thank you."
Akane sighed at Russ's enthusiasm, feeling a bit tired from the fight. She wasn't sure if she had the energy to go on just yet, but knew it was her duty. Slowly she began to struggle back to her feet.

Spoiler

Show

Akane will use two healing surges to get back all her health.

[Azerian Kelimon]

Amen, scarred brother. Seems like you took the worst beating, though Akane here was also rather roughed up. Everyone else is more or less okay, maybe with a few bruises.

Now, let's keep the score: Miss Knowledge nailed two ogres, Yuri terminated two ogres and half of a beetle, Ultair has half a beetle for him, Akane downed a beetle, you downed an ogre, and I claim the defeat of one of those ogres and of that little wizardly whore.

All in all, I'd say Yuri is on the lead, me and miss Knowledge follow, and Ultair is last with only half an enemy at his count.

And I'm getting something to stop or trace teleportation as soon as I can. That little she-devil is going to pay in blood and copper commons if I meet her again.

Now, everyone, if you've all finished resting, I suggest we continue and go meet Ole Dingo, whoever he or she or it might be.

[NEO|Phyte]

Following the conclusion of the fight, Ultair walked off towards the apple he bisected, looking to see if his errant weapon was recoverable. Along the way, he pulled a nondescript cloth from a pocket, cleaned the beetle goo from his weapon, and returned the (still clean, somehow) cloth to where it was pulled from. Regardless of the status of the thrown knife, he seems quite pleased when he returns to the group.
"Today is starting to look up, think we'll meet anyone else along the path?"

Spoiler

Show

As far as I can see, 4e doesn't treat shuriken as ammunition, which means they should be recoverable after being used. I'll wait on 'refunding' my thrown shuriken until I get your opinion on the matter.

[Azerian Kelimon]

Looking at Akane's face, Johnny decides to give her some praise to counteract the effects of the criticism.

Aww, come on, don't go emo like that. You did a good job back there with the beetles, and I'm impressed by the number of blows you took without flinching.

There's only one little thing. That speech...what was THAT? I'm green on the battlefield, but even I can see that every second lost chatting can mean a blade in your back. If you want to say something like that, just tell me beforehand and I'll tape it. Don't lose any time presenting yourself to your foes, because they aren't going to be as chivalrous as you or me, mademoiselle, he says as he courtseys with a small smirk, arms wide open and legs crossed.

Other than that, I'm impressed by everyone's work. We dispatched an ambush quickly and efficiently, and I'm rather proud of you guys and girls.

[Terraoblivion]

Akane-senpai spoke to her. She actually spoke to her and she had smiled as well. Her blush grew deeper as she quickly backed away. What should she say? She couldn't let Akane-senpai see her blush like that. What would Akane-senpai do with someone pathetic and blushy like that? No she had to be strong and cool to show Akane-senpai that she was worthy.

"Y-you're welcome..."

And then she heard that the silly, charge-happy guy who clearly took himself for a leader said she was in the lead with defeating enemies. This did nothing to make her blush any less impressive. It was just luck, nothing special she had done. She wasn't special at all. But this might make Akane-senpai notice her, she had apparently been efficient in the battle. And the bastard seemed to think that Akane-senpai had screwed up. What gave him the right to think he knew this better than Akane-senpai? Was he the one who had fought monsters in the past? Who had saved her? He wasn't. He was just some idiot who thought he could boss them around, when it was clear that Akane-senpai should be the leader.

[AmberVael]

Akane frowned at Johnny, crossing her arms as she sat back down, still a bit weak at the knees, though she tried not to show it. She tossed her hair and looked to one side as she got ready to reply to Johnny, trying to distract the others from her weakness.
"If we don't let them know what we stand for and why we fight, there is no reason in fighting at all! Why fight for no reason? What if they're on your side? Besides, no one ever interrupts me, and that's the truth!" Akane said defensively. She was right about never being interrupted, too. She always seemed to have adequate time to show off.

[Tengu]

Before we continue...

Spoiler

Show

(6d20)[15][1][13][12][1][11](53)

Hmm, interesting. Anyway...

Ultair manages to find his shuriken without any obstructions or adventures on the way. It also seems that the forest, or at least the closest area, is safe currently - apparently all the wandering creatures got discouraged by the sound of combat (yeah, right...).

[Azerian Kelimon]

Akane frowned at Johnny, crossing her arms as she sat back down, still a bit weak at the knees, though she tried not to show it. She tossed her hair and looked to one side as she got ready to reply to Johnny, trying to distract the others from her weakness.
"If we don't let them know what we stand for and why we fight, there is no reason in fighting at all! Why fight for no reason? What if they're on your side? Besides, no one ever interrupts me, and that's the truth!" Akane said defensively. She was right about never being interrupted, too. She always seemed to have adequate time to show off.

This time, Johnny's smile is a deeply sarcastic one. If smile's were chemicals, this one would be a type D acid.

Correct...until an experienced wizard or a battlescarred warrior sees you speaking instead of fighting and rushes you, impaling you with a sword or leeching the lifeblood out of you, your spine breaking like paper, darkness reaching your eyes.

Look, let's explain a cold hard truth: Most people don't give a damn about missions and crusades. They're selfish little bastards looking out for number one, and we don't even rank as number twenty to them. If you leave an opening, chances are someone is going to slip a dagger through it and twist the knife to make it hurt.

And maybe you haven't been interrupted...but then again, how many top brass' have you offed?

Yeah, I thought so. The people who have made it to the top got there by being wary and cautious, and by grabbing the goddess Occassion by her sole lock of hair. Don't expect them to let you finish your speech, but rather to throw a healthy dose of fire breath at you.

Look at the monsters we have just killed, he says, turning around in a circle, arms stretched to the sides.

They were poorly prepared and equipped even worse. They weren't a real challenge.

Think of it, girl. One day, those little speeches are gonna get you into trouble. And it'll be so deep you won't be able to get out, and it might even drag us all down together as we try to bail you.

[Oslecamo]

Brother Johnny, I have to suport sister Akane in this matter. Faith whitout deeds is worthless, but deeds whitout faith isn't any better.

With these words Lemon puts his bolter in his chest with another loud CLANG.


When we face any obstacle, we must remember our beliefs and purpose, and show them for all to see.

This way, not only do we instill fear in the heart of our enemies, we also inspire our allies for greater deeds. More than once I had to fight along weak allies, wich would normally cower and hide at any sign of danger. But thanks to the the presence of me and by battle brothers at the frontline facing the enemy directly, they would stand and fight, inspired by our actions.

Also, just as bullets and blades redeem heretic bodies, words redeem heretic souls, and more than once I saw truly glorious speeches turn foes into allies and change the tide of battles.

Russ then looks directly into Johnny's eyes.


So, don't critisize sister Akane for showing off her beatifull lolita body and soft childish voice, I mean, showing off her beliefs. We must be proud of what we are and we think, and we must be proud of dying for it. It's our duty, and our honor, as heros.

[Azerian Kelimon]

That is true, Lemon. But a soldier must always employ his brain over his brawn when he can. There is glory in martyrdom, but that glory pales in comparison to returning unscathed to see the wife and kids.

Plus, I know what I say sounds strange, but you'd really have to see where I come from. There, there is a cutthroat competition for success. A majority of people are too poor to buy food to eat, while a handful of people revel in riches beyond the measure of many kingdoms. If you don't play to win and to do your best, you fall to the wayside, and then there's only dreams of possible futures and a haze of alcohol old age awaiting. We cannot forsake ideals, but that doesn't mean we mustn't know when to fold 'em.

But enough of that. I understand what you say, and commend you. You're truly brave people if you're willing to die for a faith.

[AmberVael]

"There is always a place for hope and truth in the world, Johnny. Please don't abandon it just because you despair." Akane pleaded, clasping her hands together in front of her like she was fond of doing.
"People will listen to the truth, even if they don't believe it at first. Trust them to have good hearts in the end, and the power of love will triumph over all."
Akane gave a sappy smile while her player tried not to gag too much.

[Azerian Kelimon]

Heh. I could give the perfect ending to that, but the diabetes would kill us all faster than a big dragon who hasn't eaten for the past millennium.

But yes, My Fair Lady, that is correct. We have to believe in the things you mentioned, or the world is not worth living on.

Johnny then winks and shoots Akane a little mischievous look.

In other news, you should consider more resistant clothing. Even the trees have been peeking on you. With attacks provoking such a result, it's no surprise monsters attack you.

[Oslecamo]

Hoho, brother Johnny, from where I come, martyrdoom is the greatest glory possible, for the Emperor himself sacrificed his own life to save all of us from the chaos gods. Life is neverending sufering, and for those who seek perfection there is no rest in this side of the grave. The little ephemeral joys of the common people, that's why me and my battle brothers laid down our lives everyday back in our empire.


But believe, the love of the Emperor shall triumph over all hardships.

[Terraoblivion]

She listened to the argument as she went on, horrified by the things Johnny was saying. A world were most people starved and where you had to backstab to succeed? That was wholly unlike the place she knew, granted some other areas far away had people starving she had been told and the news seemed to agree, but no one really starved. At least no one who existed beyond the news and that was as good as nobody. That was about the time her civics teacher would start talking about how terrible the world was and how apathetic youth was, but it was also about the time she zoned out of attention to the class.

At least Akane-senpai held herself with dignity and refused to get dragged down to Johnny's level. Cynicism never got anybody anywhere, nor did his bull-headed stupidity. Who did he think he was? Akane-senpai had done far more than he ever had and fought far more than he had. She knew what she was doing.

[Oslecamo]

Lemon notices Yuri watching the discussion whitout saying a word, and decides she needs a little encorangement.

Speak sister Yuri! Or have you done some sacred vow of silence? You seem like you're gonna explode if you don't let out whatever you're keeping inside you. Also, by the way you're looking at Akane, you seem to really admire her. Don't be so reserved, and let your heart speack for itself. Show us your true feeling, or you'll end up becoming some background feature!

[AmberVael]

Akane blushed furiously as she looked down at herself, giving an 'eep' of surprise as she folded her arms around herself and hunched over to hide most of what had been revealed. Crimson continued to spread across her face though, and she had no real way to fix her costume so quickly with everyone watching like they were. Having that pointed out to her made her extremely self conscious, and now she'd be worrying about it for so long. Oh, what must they think of her now? She would surely die of shame!

[Terraoblivion]

The blush began creeping up her face. Was it that visible? Did everybody know how she felt about Akane-senpai? What if they disapproved? The shame of it all.

"I-I wasn't really thinking too much about it. I just thought Johnny's home must have been a horrible place. I'm sure that is why he is so bitter today..." She sent Akane a quick glance for help in this as she stammered out her reply to Russ.

Still at least he seemed to take an interest in her. Perhaps he was not that bad a person, despite his peculiar views of the world. She smiled shyly at him as thanks for his concern.

[Azerian Kelimon]

Here, the warlord says, taking off his armor. Below the hide cuirass is a simple gray shirt with a circular sign crossed by what seems to be a tree branch pointing down, and a little legend: "You may say that I'm a dreamer, But I'm not the only one. I hope someday you'll join us, And the world will be as one".

Use this or cut it up or do whatever you need to. I'll restitch it later. What kind of gentleman would I be if I didn't help you cover up your stuff?

Spoiler

Show

Double hide armor means a +6 armor bonus! That's what I call a tank.

[AmberVael]

"Thank you..."
Akane took the armor from Johnny and put it on, vowing to fix her own suit as soon as possible. Or rather, just wait for people to forget that it was damaged so it would be mended. Surely that would be pretty soon.