*Scepter of Intolerable Munchkinism**

Aura: Overwhelming (various schools), Evil; CL 20th
Slot: Held
Price: 1,780,065 gp (not including the cost of special material) + 12000 gp (aurorum metal)
Weight: 12 lbs.
Description: Crafted from pure Aurorum and adorned with intricate engravings, this ornate scepter radiates an overwhelming magical aura. It's truly beautiful, gleaming bright with varying hues of pink and indigo. Despite it's appearance, it's an utterly Evil item and any not-Evil creature which tries to hold it will not be able to use any of its powers. Any good-aligned creatured that voluntarily touches it must pass a Will save (DC 32) or receive 2d6 Wisdom damage.
It provides the wielder countless powerful defenses and abilities, including but not limited to:

- +6 enhancement bonus to all ability scores
- seven +5 bonuses to AC (deflection, natural armor, luck, insight, competence, dodge, profane)
- six +5 bonuses to Saves (resistance, luck, insight, competence, morale, profane)
- +8 armor bonus (like a pair of Bracelets of Armor)
- Spell Resistance 32
- Damage Reduction 5/adamantine
- Energy Resistance 10 (fire, cold, acid, electricity, sound)
- 24 temporary hit points (renewed daily at dawn)
- Immunity to disease and poison, including supernatural ones
- Immunity to gases and suffocation
- Constant Fly, Evasion, Freedom of Movement, Mind Blank, Spell Turning, and True Seeing effects
- The wearer leaves no traces or scent whatsoever and is undetectable through the Scent ability

Additionally, the wielder can cast Miracle at will, once per round, as a 20th-level spellcaster, with the limitation that it cannot duplicate spells with an Experience Points cost or a material component that costs more than 100 gp.

Used as a weapon, it functions as a +5 heavy mace of Transmutation. After its wielder successfully hits a creature that has damage reduction, with the normal effects, over the next round, the scepter transforms itself, taking on the properties required to overcome that creature's damage reduction.

The aurorum scepter has the same hardness (15) and hit points (25) of a +5 heavy mace made of normal steel, but if sundered or damaged in any way it can be reformed by bringing together its fragments (a full-round action). The broken pieces bond quickly and seamlessly, restoring the item to its previous state.

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But to be fair, it was a joke session.