Wait, when did Arther learn THAT?

[King_of_GRiffins]

Impossible Flight

Prerequiste- 13 Wisdom

Benefit- As a standard action you may throw youself at the ground and attempt to fly with average maneuverbility at a speed of 40ft.To fly you must roll your wisdom modifier plus one or lower. At the end of each round of flight you must roll again to resume flying or allow gravity back into your life and take falling damage.

Normal- you cannot fly beyond normal means (wings, magic, devices)

Special: A roll of natural one is success, and a natural 20 is failure. The DC does not go below 1. This feat does not allow you to gain any other flying feats. No adition modifiers (such as fog) can change the DC, you allows know where the ground is, even if you cant see it.


Improved Impossible Flight

Prerequiste- 17 wisdom, Impossible Flight

Benifit- As a standard action on a roll of your wisdom modifier + 5 you throw yourself at the ground and begin to fly at a speed of 60ft with good maneuverbility. At the end of the round, roll again or never complain about how uncomterable bunjie cords are again and take falling damage.

Normal- Fly with speed fo 40ft and average maneurverabliity on a roll of Wisdom mod + 1.

Special- A roll of natural one is success, and a natural 20 is failure. The DC does not go below 1. This feat does not allow you to gain any other flying feats. No adition modifiers (such as fog) can change the DC, you allows know where the ground is, even if you cant see it.


Bassicly, this is a feat for those with no chance of flight otherwise, inspired by another thread, and a book, Throwing yourself at the ground and missing. What Im looking for here is some advice, whether or not you think its balanced, or anything related to it.

[Boomer]

I love it... been hating 3rd edition lately, but I still love the feat.

[King_of_GRiffins]

Thantos- How so?

Boomer- thanks

Also, I now dedicate this thread to Hitchhicker realted feats. Go ahead and have fun.

[Annarrkkii]

Vogonic Poetry

You have studied with Vogons of the planet Vogsphere, and have studied the 'arts' of their poetry.

Prerequisites: Iron Will, Toughness, Great Fortitude

Benefits: A number of times per day equal to the absolute value of your Charisma modifier plus 1, you may recite vogonic poetry. Reciting is a full-round action, and any who hear you must make a will save eqaul to a DC of (10+your charisma modifier times -1). Those who fail suffer the effects of an inflict light wounds spell, with a caster level equall to the absolute value of your Charisma modifier.

You yourself must also make the save, if you fail, you suffer the same effects.

Note: Vogons are immune to the effects of this feat.

[Beelzebub1111]

haha...I like that one...now for an item...

Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster

The pan galactic gargle blaster is the best drink in existance. The effect of a Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster is like having your brains smashed out by a slice of lemon wrapped round a large gold brick.
To make one you must:
1. Take the juice from one bottle of that Ol' Janx Spirit.
2. Pour into it one measure of water from the seas of Santraginus V.
3. Allow three cubes of Arcturan Mega-gin to melt into the mixture (it must be properly iced or the benzene is lost).
4. Allow four litres of Fallian marsh gas to bubble through it.
5. Over the back of a silver spoon float a measure of Qalactin Hypermint extract.
6. Drop in the tooth of an Algolian Suntiger.
7. Sprinkle Zamphuor.
8. Add an olive.

Then you may drink it, but very carefully. Upon imbibation of this beverage you are instantly drunk. taking 5 wisdom damage, 5 dexterity damage, and 5 inteligence damage.

[King_of_GRiffins]

Good, though how about making them a little more probable for dnd.


Horrible Performance

Prerequisites: Iron Will, Toughness, Great Fortitude, bard level 1, perform(any oratory)

Benifit- Once per day, you may recite the most horrible oratory known to man for 1d3 rounds. Upon making a performance check everyone capable of understanding you must make a Fortitude save (DC equal to performance check) or become sickened and collaspe for 1d6 rounds, along with taking damage from an inflict moderate wounds spell as a cleric of bard level. A succesfull save results in half damage from the inflict spell and no sickness.

Special- Any who have heard beofre may take the save at half the DC. All who hear must make the fortitude save, including the performer.



I suppose the Gargle blaster could go under the poison category...

[Sophistemon]

I erased my previous post because I had written without thinking. I actually like the concept of anyone who's brave enough to try it being able to fly, but I was commenting on the difficulty. But it wouldn’t be so cool if it weren't so hard to pull off, I guess.

[Sophistemon]

haha...I like that one...now for an item...

Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster

The pan galactic gargle blaster is the best drink in existance. The effect of a Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster is like having your brains smashed out by a slice of lemon wrapped round a large gold brick.
To make one you must:
1. Take the juice from one bottle of that Ol' Janx Spirit.
2. Pour into it one measure of water from the seas of Santraginus V.
3. Allow three cubes of Arcturan Mega-gin to melt into the mixture (it must be properly iced or the benzene is lost).
4. Allow four litres of Fallian marsh gas to bubble through it.
5. Over the back of a silver spoon float a measure of Qalactin Hypermint extract.
6. Drop in the tooth of an Algolian Suntiger.
7. Sprinkle Zamphuor.
8. Add an olive.

Then you may drink it, but very carefully. Upon imbibation of this beverage you are instantly drunk. taking 5 wisdom damage, 5 dexterity damage, and 5 inteligence damage.

Hilarious!

[Premier]

If we're going for fun, we might just as well make it accurate. In this spirit, I offer the following corollaries to the secret (or rather, knack) of flying:

- In order to miss the ground, something should happen, or some thought should appear to the character that makes him completely forget about hitting the ground. Without such an event or thought happening at the exact moment, he will automatically fail his roll.

- The character should not be able to use his hands for picking anything up, holding anything, or manipulating anything with his hands. Attempting to do so should result in the immediate loss of flight.

[Zangor]

- The character should not be able to use his hands for picking anything up, holding anything, or manipulating anything with his hands. Attempting to do so should result in the immediate loss of flight.

Not true. Arthur picks up his bag when he first accidentaly learns to fly, remember?

[Leethar]

Improbable Propulsion
Transmutation
Level: Sor/Wiz 5 Components: V,S,M Casting time: Full round action Range: Touch Target: Touched vehicle/Vessel Duration: Travel time Saving throw: none (Harmless) Spell resistanc: no
Material Component: 42 individual monkey hairs

This spell turns any touched vehicle (Boat, Carraige, Flying machine, etc), regardless of its current means of propulsion, into an impossibly fast vehicle. It is possible to travel across an entire globe in less than a second, so any travel time takes 1 round.
However, there are side effects. Upon reaching your destination, any one of an infinite number of improbable events. Things such as fallow fields litereally jumping up, flipping over, and becoming fertile, sailors hopelessly drowning in the sea in deep fog suddenly finding a liferaft, and large animals randomly appearing in the upper atmosphere are just a few examples of what could happen. The exact effects can, by the laws of physics, never under any circumstances be predicted and are entirely under the GM's discretion

[Beelzebub1111]

The Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal
Colossal Aberration


Hit Dice: 66d8+1257 (1554 hp)
Initiative: +5 (+5 Dex)
Speed: 40 ft. (8 squares)
Armor Class: 37 (-8 size, +5 Dex, +30 natural), touch 7, flat-footed 32
Base Attack/Grapple: +49/+89
Attack: Bite +65 melee (4d6 +24)
Full Attack: Bite +65 melee (4d6 +24) and 2 slams +60 melee (2d8 +12)
Space/Reach: 30 ft.+/30 ft.+
Special Attacks: Swallow whole
Special Qualities: Darkvision 60ft., Invaunerability, Improved Grab
Saves: Fort +43, Ref +27, Will +31
Abilities: Str 59, Dex 21, Con 49, Int 2, Wis 3, Cha 3
Skills: Heal -2, Hide -11, Listen -4, Spot -4, Survival -2
Feats: Die Hard,Endurance,Great Fortitude,Self-Sufficient,Toughness

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Environment: Any land
Organization: Solitary
Challenge Rating: impossible (5 if you have a towel)
Treasure: None
Alignment: Always chaotic neutral
Advancement: 67-198 HD (Colossal)
Level Adjustment: -

Too horrid and hideous to describe


The Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal is a creature that hails from the land of Traal, and will eat anything. If you are to encounter one, the Guide tells you that it's impossible to slay, so you should wrap a towel around your head. This creature is so mind-bogglingly stupid that it assumes that if YOU can't see IT, then IT can't see YOU.


Combat

It will try to eat you. that's it...see the previous description for strategy


Swallow Whole (Ex): If a creature with this special attack begins its turn with an opponent held in its mouth (see Improved Grab), it can attempt a new grapple check (as though attempting to pin the opponent). If it succeeds, it swallows its prey, and the opponent takes bite damage. Unless otherwise noted, the opponent can be up to one size category smaller than the swallowing creature. Being swallowed has various consequences, depending on the creature doing the swallowing. A swallowed creature is considered to be grappled, while the creature that did the swallowing is not. A swallowed creature can try to cut its way free with any light slashing or piercing weapon (the amount of cutting damage required to get free is noted in the creature description), or it can just try to escape the grapple. The Armor Class of the interior of a creature that swallows whole is normally 10 + 1/2 its natural armor bonus, with no modifiers for size or Dexterity. If the swallowed creature escapes the grapple, success puts it back in the attacker’s mouth, where it may be bitten or swallowed again.

Improved Grab: (see MM)

Invaunerability: The Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal is immune to all forms of physical, energy, and magical damage. Treat as DR infinity/-

[King_of_GRiffins]

Raise, raise, raise my thread from the dead.

This whole thing still is pretty intresting, and I think that now whould be a good time to get some additional input before attempting any of this out of PC's/Dm's.

[Lysander]

I think Impossible Flight and Improved Impossible flight's prerequisite shouldn't be 13 wisdom or higher but 13 wisdom or lower

[King_of_GRiffins]

I've heard people say that, and Iv'e been thinking. Both a high and low wisdom character have an equal chance of this depending. There is just this gap inbetween that has to be dealt with

below 8, your not aware enough to relize you shouldn't be flying, above 13 you relize you shouldn't think about that or else...

So mybye it could go, you have high wisdom or low intelligence? it doest make too much sence that having too much should work the same as having too little, so I jsut opted with high to begin with. Its a challenge to get something high enough, but a few bestow curses later and you could do anything( or nothing)...

[squishycube]

Now that this thread has been raised, here's a nifty little item that many an adventurer will love to have.

The Adventurers Guide to the Multiverse

This simple leather-bound book looks very commonplace. The only remarkable thing about it is that it as the words 'Don't Panic' scribed on it in large friendly letters.
You also get the faint idea that you got a good deal with this book.
In spite of its plain appearance, this book is probably the most remarkable item in the multiverse. The Adventurers Guide to the Multiverse contains information and descriptions of an unimaginable number of things in it. The actual descriptions contained change constantly as new acrticles are added and others are removed.

Anyone who would like to know anything about anything just opens the book to see whether the book contains information on the subject.

Depending on how commonly the information looked for is known, there are differing chances of success. Consult the table below to look up how the chances are divided for a particular subject and then roll a d%

{table]
[tr]
[td]Category[/td][td]Chances[/td]
[/tr]
[tr]
[td]Substantial Minority[/td][td]0-60, 61-90, 91-99, 100[/td]
[/tr]
[tr]
[td]Few people[/td][td]0-50, 51-80, 81-95, 96-100[/td]
[/tr]
[tr]
[td]Few people who don't like talking[/td][td]0-40, 41-70, 71-90, 91-100[/td]
[/tr]
[tr]
[td]Virtually No one[/td][td]0-20, 21-60, 61-80, 81-100[/td]
[/tr]
[/table]

{table]
[tr]
[td]Result Group[/td][td]Result[/td]
[/tr]
[tr]
[td]1[/td][td]Quite accurate[/td]
[/tr]
[tr]
[td]2[/td][td]Inaccurate, but not fatally so[/td]
[/tr]
[tr]
[td]3[/td][td]Wildly inaccurate and potentially fatal[/td]
[/tr]
[tr]
[td]4[/td][td]None[/td]
[/tr]
[/table]

For example, Mailee wants to know something about a certain wand she has found. Arcane matters that are not evil fall in the 'Few people' category, so the DM rolls a percentile die and gets a result of 76. This puts the result in group 2. This makes the information she gets slightly inaccurate, but probably still useful.
Lidda is impressed by this book and wants to use it to look up information about a dagger she recently found.
As it happens, this dagger is actually an artifact and therefor it falls in the category 'Virtually no one'.
Again, the DM rolls a percentile die and this time the result is 62. That makes this is group 3 result. The information is so inaccurate it could be fatal. For example the result for this weapon, which is in fact a Vorpal Dagger with an extended threat range, could be that it heals the amount of damage it would normally inflict.
Note: Even though the Advanturers Guide to the Multiverse itself is an artifact, it does contain lots of accurate information about itself.

There is a cumulative change of 1% per day that the article the reader looks up has been changed. (That is, removed, updated or replaced.) If that is the case, reroll on the table above for the new result.

Outrageously strong divination; CL 16th; Weight 2 lb.

Have fun DM's everywhere :-)

EDIT: Spelling

[squishycube]

*bumb* :-$

[Nightmarenny]

Spell-Summon great question and Answer.

With this spell you may at anytime force the knolede of the the answer and question into your head causing the intire universe to reset allowing you to avoid any danger. ;D

[squishycube]

Your DM hates you.

[firepup]

neat idea, i like it. needs to mention something about towels...

just an idea but a spell along the lines of hitchiker's guide to the galaxy-ish

Create Improbability
Conjuration
Level: Sor/Wiz 4
Components: V,S,M
Casting time: Full round action
Range: n/a
Duration: 2 minutes/level
Saving throw: none
Spell resistanc: no
Material Component: a handful of the remains of a choas beast.

spellcaster must be a wild mage to learn this spell

discription: this spell causes a improbibility, and upon casting of the spell, a improbibility takes place, the caster rolls a d20 to show what type of improbibility happens

1-5 : usefull improbibility, helps the caster somehow, may not be apparent in the immediate future. (i.e. so and so needs to get over the pit of doom, casts the spell, a elephant falls from the sky filling the hole)

6-10: improbibility causes a problem, whether now or in the future (i.e. so and so casts the spell and an elephant stampede knocks him into the hole which gets filled with elephants...)

11-15: useless improbibility, improbibility has little or no effect on the situation (i.e. the characters hair turns green for the duration of the spell)

16-20: combonation of two of the improbibilities roll again twice.
(i.e. you and your enemy spontaneously turn into couches)

any effects caused by the spell end 3d6 hours after the spell would end if it isn't cancelled by the caster if spell is ended prematurely, causing them to dissapear suddenly if something physical appeared or slowly fade awayotherwise

[JadedDM]

Arthur, not Arther. But hey, how about someone try and create an SEP field?

[Minchandre]

Finite Improbability Field
Conjuration
Level: Sor/Wiz 3, Bard 1
Components: V,S,M
Casting time: Full round action
Range: n/a
Duration: Until the next change of clothes
Saving throw: none
Spell resistance: yes
Material Component: a warm cup of tea

Upon the casting of this spell, all of the molecules composing the undergarments of target humanoid move simultaneously 3 feet to the left. The target must make a charisma check; if they succeed, the recieve CHA +2 for the duration of the spell; otherwise, they become very embarrassed and must flee from the premises at maximum speed.

[Kupi]

I'm not used to making up skills, but here's my attempt at the SEP field...

Create Somebody Else's Problem Field
Illusion
Level: Sor/Wiz 6
Components: V,S,M
Casting time: Full round action
Range: Touch
Duration: 24 hours
Saving throw: Will negates
Spell resistance: no
Material Component: Powdered remains of Peril-Sensitive Sunglasses

For one day, one object touched by the caster begins to radiate a Somebody Else's Problem field. This effect causes all creatures to become unable to detect the object by any non-magical means. No Will save is allowed against the Somebody Else's Problem field unless the creature is already aware of the object's existence. If the object under the effect of a Somebody Else's Problem field harms a creature, that creature may make a Will save (DC 10 + caster level) to resist the effects of the field and become aware of the object, as it has quite obviously become their problem. Allied creatures of a harmed creature are not allowed to make a Will save against the illusion; since they are not the harmed creature, it is not their problem, and is therefore Somebody Else's Problem. Creatures that attempt to detect the object through magical means may make a similar Will save.

[King_of_GRiffins]

SEP Field
Transmutation
Wiz/Sor 4
Components: V,S,M
Casting Time: 1 Round
Area: 25 + 5ft/level radius
Duration: 1 hour/level
Saving Throw: Will Negate
Spell Resistance: No

Upon casting this spell, all search and spot checks to find something in the affected area automatically fail. For an object to be found, the subjects must make a spot check greater than 14 + Caster Level while searching for something not relevent to the object.

Material Component: A fragment of an object with an area greater than 100 ft²

[roadkiller]

Nobody's made the Babblefish yet. I guess I'll try, although I'm not at all good at making monsters.

The Babblefish
Diminuative ?
Hit Dice: 1d4-2 (minimum 1)
Speed: Swim 10'
AC: 14 (+4 size)
Base attack: 0
Attack: Bite +0 Melee (1d2-1)
Special Attacks: Brain Translation
Saves: Fort 0, Ref 1, Will 4
Abilities: Str 8, Dex 10, Con 6, Int 2, Wis 14, Cha 8
CR: 1/8
Alignment: True Neutral

Babblefish are small tadpole-like fish, that is spread throughout the universe. They are used by the intellegent races as a translator with it's brain translation ability. With that ability, it proves that there is no god by the arguement that it was too useful to have evolved on its own, therfore god must have done it. There lies, proof of god, therefore he doesn't exists.

Combat

Babblefish rarely fight, but instead attempt to use their Brain Translation ability to escape and feed.

Brain Translation

A babblefish can enter through the ear of a victim with a DC 5 Dexterity check if the victim is willing, or a 10 if it isn't. Once inside the victim's head, it melds with the brain's communication center, feeding off of mental energies of others and excreting the waste, the translation, into the victim's mind, translating it. The ability only works with spoken speech. The victim is essentially under the effect of a perminant Tounges spell, but can't speak any of the languages heard.

Please feel free to make a better version.

[Minchandre]

Definitely an aberration.

[Goumindong]

I think Impossible Flight and Improved Impossible flight's prerequisite shouldn't be 13 wisdom or higher but 13 wisdom or lower

Nah, it is just the players score, not the characters score ;)

A wiz 8 player is never going to realize that missing the ground== flying.

[Jothki]

I'd just make a character have to fail a DC -5 spot check for the ground. If they want to fly, they have to stack up distractions to the point where they can get far into the negatives.

[Sir_Ophiuchus]

You have of course heard the line that the ground readies a slam attack on its turn for anyone who attacks it?

[Thayan]

I'd just make a character have to fail a DC -5 spot check for the ground. If they want to fly, they have to stack up distractions to the point where they can get far into the negatives.

I would say you have to make a DC 30 Spot Check to notice a small blue bug that looks surprisingly like the luggage you lost at heathrow airport. Or something that will distract you from the oncoming ground...:)