Crack Pairings II - Brain Bleach not Supplied

[Closak]

*Buries myself in a crypt somewhere*

YOU NEVER FIND ME NOW!
...I hope...



*Screams in horror as the thought of the ABD spawning an army of Half-Dragons re-enters my brain*

[ClericOfBelker]

*Buries myself in a crypt somewhere*

YOU NEVER FIND ME NOW!
...I hope...



*Screams in horror as the thought of the ABD spawning an army of Half-Dragons re-enters my brain*

Spoiler

Show

I'm in the crypt.
EPIC DOMINATE PERSON
TELEPORT!

*backs away from Zanaril rather quickly*

Ugh... The mental images... They... They're just so wrong...

*Runs into me*
TELEPORT
EPIC DOMINATE PERSON!

[Closak]

AHHHHH...What is thy bidding my master?

[ClericOfBelker]

AHHHHH...What is thy bidding my master?

*Evil Laugh* You 2 are going in my crack pairing!

[Silverraptor]

Oh dear...

This doesn't look good...

If anyone wants me to free them from the Cleric of Belkar's control. Let me know.

In the mean time... Mind Blank!

[Zanaril]

If anyone wants me to free them from the Cleric of Belkar's control. Let me know.

Nah, I prefer them this way.

[Silverraptor]

Nah, I prefer them this way.

Ok, then.

But I feel I did the non-crack of the Inkyrius crack extension for nothing.

That was great!!! Excelent plot and job keeping V and Inkyrius Ambigious. 5 Stars.

"I can't believe you collapsed this early. You survived longer in bed." Too funny. Naughty Inkyrius.

I guess this means with all the support then I should be the winner of the reward then, right?

[Zanaril]

Ok, then.

But I feel I did the non-crack of the Inkyrius crack extension for nothing.

It was amusing, I'll give you that. But I just don't particually care about Haley.

I guess this means with all the support then I should be the winner of the reward then, right?

Maybe, but to keep them loyal you have to regularly feed them with their prefered crack pairing.

[TheBibliophile]

Oh dear...

This doesn't look good...

If anyone wants me to free them from the Cleric of Belkar's control. Let me know.

In the mean time... Mind Blank!

I'll help! An Epic-level elven evoker should be able to do something, right?

Something specifically meaning Meteor Swarming CoB until he's at -10 hp.

[Closak]

Master tells me to hump ABD.
Me hump ABD for master.
*Drools like a mindless buffon*


My subconciusness: HELP!

[Zanaril]

Master tells me to hump ABD.
Me hump ABD for master.
*Drools like a mindless buffon*


My subconciusness: HELP!

*The ABD isn't impressed at your fumbling attempts, and decides to teach you how it's done properly*

[TheBibliophile]

I cast Meteor Swarm on both dragons several times, bind their souls so it won't happen again and cast Mind Blank on everyone in the vicinity.

[Zanaril]

I cast Meteor Swarm on both dragons several times, bind their souls so it won't happen again and cast Mind Blank on everyone in the vicinity.

Aww, but Cosak and the ABD made such a cute pair.

[TheBibliophile]

Aww, but Cosak and the ABD made such a cute pair.

Tough. I couldn't cope with the horror of reptilian mating.

[Zanaril]

Tough. I couldn't cope with the horror of reptilian mating.

You could have just silenced them and turned them invisible. Or teleported them somewhere else. Now I can't scy on them.

[TheBibliophile]

You could have just silenced them and turned them invisible. Or teleported them somewhere else. Now I can't scy on them.

Okay, okay, just to keep your perverted little mind happy...

*smashes black sapphires*

True Resurrection!

Teleportation Circle!

Now get you from hence!

[Zanaril]

Okay, okay, just to keep your perverted little mind happy...

*smashes black sapphires*

True Resurrection!

Teleportation Circle!

Now get you from hence!

Wait... you're also a cleric?

[TheBibliophile]

Wait... you're also a cleric?

Um... ignore that. It was a clerical error.

*escapes under cover of bad pun*

[The Dark Fiddler]

Oh come on, I'm not that bad. *Smiles, showing pointy teeth*

And you wouldn't want to make me sad, would you?

*backs away from Zanaril rather quickly*

Ugh... The mental images... They... They're just so wrong...

I think I've spent far too much time... someplace. I don't know where exactly, but when you think pointy teeth would look attractive, you've spent too much time SOMEWHERE.


And yes, medias other than writing would be allowed.

[Kyronea]

I've decided to spit out something on that thing I made a banner on earlier, with Haley x Durkon.

Spoiler

Show

The desert breeze tossed another bit of grit inbetween Haley's teeth as she dodged behind a pillar. She'd just distracted Elan with a game involving urns and did not want him to see her again now. "Haley!" he called as he walked right by her, oblivious as always. "Where'd you go?"

As he moved out of earshot, Haley breathed a sigh of relief and made her way through across town to a little out of the way inn that catered to "special interests." The innkeeper grinned and winked as she passed through up to her room.

Inside, Durkon was waiting for her, already stripped of clothing above the waist. She feasted her eyes on his small but powerful chest, admiring his fuzzy dwarf hair; she couldn't wait to start tugging on it. "Heya, Durkon," she said seductively, casting him a little wink.

Durkon smiled and bowed his head. "'allo, me Mistress," he intoned respectively. The sound of his title for her caused an instant feral smirk to grace her face. "Oooh, starting with that already?" She bounced over to him and ran her hand over his smooth pate. "You just really like this too much, don't you?"

Durkon shivered in delight. "Yes, Mistress."

Haley giggled. "I can't tell you how happy I am to hear that." She suddenly slapped him in the face. Durkon let out a low rumble of pain mixed with a pleasured laugh. "Now then," Haley said, inching her face down to his and running her tongue over his lips, "shall we start with the whip, or the paddle?"

That was fun to write.

[Silverraptor]

...

I think I may need to take a break here for a while. I've written all usable material dry since the lack of comic updates.

...

And, you know, what's happening right now.

[TheBibliophile]

I've decided to spit out something on that thing I made a banner on earlier, with Haley x Durkon.

Spoiler

Show

The desert breeze tossed another bit of grit inbetween Haley's teeth as she dodged behind a pillar. She'd just distracted Elan with a game involving urns and did not want him to see her again now. "Haley!" he called as he walked right by her, oblivious as always. "Where'd you go?"

As he moved out of earshot, Haley breathed a sigh of relief and made her way through across town to a little out of the way inn that catered to "special interests." The innkeeper grinned and winked as she passed through up to her room.

Inside, Durkon was waiting for her, already stripped of clothing above the waist. She feasted her eyes on his small but powerful chest, admiring his fuzzy dwarf hair; she couldn't wait to start tugging on it. "Heya, Durkon," she said seductively, casting him a little wink.

Durkon smiled and bowed his head. "'allo, me Mistress," he intoned respectively. The sound of his title for her caused an instant feral smirk to grace her face. "Oooh, starting with that already?" She bounced over to him and ran her hand over his smooth pate. "You just really like this too much, don't you?"

Durkon shivered in delight. "Yes, Mistress."

Haley giggled. "I can't tell you how happy I am to hear that." She suddenly slapped him in the face. Durkon let out a low rumble of pain mixed with a pleasured laugh. "Now then," Haley said, inching her face down to his and running her tongue over his lips, "shall we start with the whip, or the paddle?"

That was fun to write.

Mind Blank! Mind Blank!

It's too late! My only option is surgery by evocation!

Delayed Blast Fireball.

*inserts capsule into specific area of brain*

*detonates*

KABOOOM!

The pain... the pain....

Now I can't remember why I did that!

EDIT:

*recovers*

...

I think I may need to take a break here for a while. I've written all usable material dry since the lack of comic updates.

...

And, you know, what's happening right now.

What is happening right now?

Apart from the Haley x Durkon BDSM, that is... oh. Oh no. I still remember! GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

[Malkar Grumbo]

*Comes back again*

Another long absence, man this is getting...

*Looks at thread to this point*

OH my gods! The horror! THE HORROR!\

*hurls self out window*

[TheBibliophile]

*Comes back again*

Another long absence, man this is getting...

*Looks at thread to this point*

OH my gods! The horror! THE HORROR!\

*hurls self out window.

Try Delayed Blast Fireball neurosurgery, sir. It works marginally better than a hammer.

[Silverraptor]

"Support for my theory continues to accrue at an alarming rate.

[Malkar Grumbo]

Try Delayed Blast Fireball neurosurgery, sir. It works marginally better than a hammer.

Thanks. *Uses*

KABOOM!

Ow....

[Lycan 01]

I think I've spent far too much time... someplace. I don't know where exactly, but when you think pointy teeth would look attractive, you've spent too much time SOMEWHERE.


And yes, medias other than writing would be allowed.

My girlfriend has very pronounced canines. They're almost fang-like. Not that I'm complaining... Its kinda cute, in a weird sort of way that I've never actually comprehended.


Yeah, I just skipped the HaleyxDurkon thing. I'd rather not have that abcess in my brain matter for the rest of my life.


Edit: Oh right, I need to write crack... Uh... GRRRRR, I can't think of ANYTHING!! >.<

[Malkar Grumbo]

My girlfriend has very pronounced canines. They're almost fang-like. Not that I'm complaining... Its kinda cute, in a weird sort of way that I've never actually comprehended.


Yeah, I just skipped the HaleyxDurkon thing. I'd rather not have that abcess in my brain matter for the rest of my life.


Edit: Oh right, I need to write crack... Uh... GRRRRR, I can't think of ANYTHING!! >.<

You might want to look out, she might be a... VAMPIRE!

[TheBibliophile]

You might want to look out, she might be a... VAMPIRE!

Or Luna Deegan (nee Travoria) in disguise!

[Malkar Grumbo]

Or Luna Deegan (nee Travoria) in disguise!

Somehow I think mine is more interesting.