Relationship Woes and Advice: The Thirteenth Woerier

[Coidzor]

men....

Yeah, we're hopeless flirts.

Also, I know a lot of guys who underestimate their appearance

Well, we sorta assume we're cro magnon-like and/or troglodytes until evidence to the contrary is produced. Then we're too busy being deliriously happy a cute girl likes us to bother rearranging our mental schematics.

^I'm born that way?

Ahh, ye olde Biological Evil. Fun times. Excellent flavour too.

[Tiger Duck]

I know I did for a very long time. But it was recently made clear to me that I'm reasonably good looking. Which was kind of a surprise to me.

but now I know.

[Coidzor]

I know I did for a very long time. But it was recently made clear to me that I'm reasonably good looking. Which was kind of a surprise to me.

but now I know.

Public opinion is divided in my case, unfortunately. I have this weird thing where people think I'm cute and yet also think I look creepy, or that my mustache is evil and must be burned off of my face.

[Eadin]

In my case , although I am not male, there are two sides=
People who don't/barely know me IRL think I'm pretty
People I know IRL think I'm average/ugly

[Tiger Duck]

Well I think you are ruggedly handsome. Which in ways is better then my more feminine look.

edit and you really are adorable, don't let anyone make you feel otherwise.

but seeing as I'm in the don't-know-you-in-real-life category. it probably doesn't mean that much to you.

[Coidzor]

Captain Happy: I'd place you more at a youthful vitality than a feminine, but that might just be me.

In my case , although I am not male, there are two sides=
People who don't/barely know me IRL think I'm pretty
People I know IRL think I'm average/ugly

Must have it skewed by knowing too many pretty people.

I remember reading about that, but can't recall the sauce now... But yeah, the more pretty people around you and the prettier you are, the higher and more unforgiving your standards are.

Or who knows, maybe you just don't have a personality that meshes with theirs in an attractive way, so they mentally lower you on their ladders.

[Malfunctioned]

I'm still not sure if I consider myself attractive or not. On one hand I know I'm not ugly but I don't seem to be typically good-looking.

[Eadin]

Captain Happy: I'd place you more at a youthful vitality than a feminine, but that might just be me.

Must have it skewed by knowing too many pretty people.

I remember reading about that, but can't recall the sauce now... But yeah, the more pretty people around you and the prettier you are, the higher and more unforgiving your standards are.

Or who knows, maybe you just don't have a personality that meshes with theirs in an attractive way, so they mentally lower you on their ladders.

I get along with most people and they aren't what I would call 'pretty', so maybe they are just jealous

[Tiger Duck]

Captain Happy: I'd place you more at a youthful vitality than a feminine, but that might just be me.

could be, I am only 23 years old. But I just go by what peoples on the internet tell me.

[Eadin]

*looks for pic of CH*
feminine? you?
that's not true =s

[The Succubus]

<snip>

Sometimes, even just venting like this can go a long way. I can't offer much advice as I've never been in the same situation but the one thing that sticks in my mind is this: You would do well to remember why you are acting the way you are. You are concerned for your friend and her daughter - keep that forefront in your mind and do not let your anger at this person overrule the love/friendship you feel for them.

[arguskos]

I am a bear. This is good if you like bears. This is bad if you do not like bears.

[Tiger Duck]

*looks for pic of CH*
feminine? you?
that's not true =s

not those last 3 no, but I usually don't look like that.

I was trying to look as tough as possible

[Coidzor]

I am a bear. This is good if you like bears. This is bad if you do not like bears.

This reminds me of that episode of the Cleveland Show where they went to New York City.

Also, we need to cosplay you as an armored grizzly bear. Or black bear. YOu can be an armored polar bear when you're older.

I get along with most people and they aren't what I would call 'pretty', so maybe they are just jealous

Well, maybe they are.

[arguskos]

This reminds me of that episode of the Cleveland Show where they went to New York City.

*whap* Bad Coidzor! No Cleveland Show! Bad!

Also, we need to cosplay you as an armored grizzly bear. Or black bear. YOu can be an armored polar bear when you're older.

I like to say that I'm half-Kodiak, half-Polar, all bear.

[Pyrian]

"I'm sorry... she's 18... I knew she was 18... I'm sorry... she's just so cute..."

What's wrong with 18?

How can people not know...

My post implied that they do know.

men....

Now what?

[Coidzor]

What's wrong with 18?

dude committed a stupid bro-foul by telling Superglucose that the girl was under the age of 16, and that he was a horrible pedo.

[MountainKing]

Ow. Truth. My heart. The goggles do nothing. If anyone needs me I'll be in the Humvee.

We'll just pretend my last update on how I'm doing doesn't exist.

[Syka]

Soooo dreading the next couple days. Emotional roller coaster, here I come. Pray Oz survives, lol. I already feel the passive aggressive building and can't do crap 'cause his parents are within earshot.

I wonder if they'd let me just stay on my pill 52 weeks a year...I hate this. :(

[Umael]

Sometimes, even just venting like this can go a long way. I can't offer much advice as I've never been in the same situation but the one thing that sticks in my mind is this: You would do well to remember why you are acting the way you are. You are concerned for your friend and her daughter - keep that forefront in your mind and do not let your anger at this person overrule the love/friendship you feel for them.

Yeah, a lot of people told me to just blow it off and go back to my book. Which I did and enjoyed it (still am, just over half-way done).

But mostly I just needed to let the vitroil out of my system.

That... thing... has done enough by me alone that I would not wish to ever be in his presence again. What he has done and what he is rumored to have done to my loved ones and to complete strangers is enough to wish him thrown down a well.

At best.

[Keld Denar]

Syka!! *HUGS!*

And yea, the doctors I've talked to who weigh in on the matter dictate that there is no psysiological reason to bleed on any regular interval, since that bleeding is simply caused by withdrawal from the hormones and is in no way anything even remotely similar to normal period bleeding...except for the blood.

I still haven't heard any doctor say its bad for you to skip the placebo and continue the hormones 365 days a year.

*Note: Keld is not a doctor, nor does he play one on TV. Consult a physician before making any major pharma-chemical decisions with your body. Some restrictions may apply, see store for details, void where prohibited, no purchase neccesary.

[Serpentine]

As soon as I got on the Pill Dr. Mum said I could just constantly take it. Did so for a number of years, never had any problems at all. So yeah, probably.

[Quincunx]

Eadin, you have the barest hint of princess in your responses, enough to convince me you're accustomed to receiving this sort of beauty-flattery in real life anyway.

*****

I ran the "hungry, hairy, and stupid" theory past my husband. He looked puzzled. "I thought it was hungry, sex, and stupid?" he said. "Yeah, me too. Wondered if there was some great insight to be had in swapping 'horny' for 'hairy'." ". . .no."

*****

In vino veritas, and in the hangover a conscience. There's karma at work: say a stinking rotten lie and get a stinking rotten hangover. Hilarious, yes. Also sad.

[Superglucose]

What's wrong with 18?

Not a damn thing. But 16 is below the age of consent in California. Damn fool tried to cockblock because he knew the girl didn't like him. Now my friend Tanj is like "**** man, go get her." I think I will thank you very much

(Seriously, a cute girl who loves Brawl as much as I do? WIN!)

Now what?

I think she didn't understand.

Eadin, you have the barest hint of princess in your responses, enough to convince me you're accustomed to receiving this sort of beauty-flattery in real life anyway.

Barest? By the by, +1.

[Quincunx]

"Least", then. A true princess would say that sort of thing in order to provoke more flattering comments. Eadin would like us to actually drop the topic, and is probably wondering why both saying "drop it" in a coy fashion and turning up the girls-rule, boys-drool rhetoric isn't stopping the commentary. (In short, and with hindsight, probably should've put it in a PM instead. Oh well, too late now.)

[Rawhide]

lot's of people hate me

because I'm evil
and a bitch ...

I think around 5 people, but I doon't like people disliking me so for me that's a lot


Well, it's not about someone in particular
Just some things that are happening around me and stuff...
It's confusing

Ok, finally have a moment to answer this more thoroughly.

Well, first, hate is a very strong word. I doubt very much that anyone would hate you. Those people you mention may dislike you, but then again, maybe you're just misunderstanding them.

Why would anyone dislike you? Well, sometimes it can't be helped. Everybody is bound to run into someone they dislike or someone that dislikes them, sometimes people don't even know why they dislike somebody. It could be because you remind them of someone who has wronged them or a traumatic experience, it could be at a completely subconscious level, or it could be because you have a different outlook or viewpoint on life. You can't be everything to everybody and you must accept that some people will not like your company no matter how good or poorly you behave.

As for five people being lots? If all of those people you think dislike you truly dislike you, that's still not very many at all. I don't like it when people don't like me either and I do everything I can to prevent that, short of compromising my values or allowing myself to be taken advantage of. But you do have to accept that no matter what you do, for some people there is nothing you can do to change their opinions. In those cases, you need to treat them well, give them as much respect as you would others and not let them get you down.

As for being evil or a witch... Everyone has their bad moments, moments they usually regret, but so far I have seen no evidence of either. Indeed, your indication that you don't like people disliking you indicates that you like to please people and probably are none of those things.

If the people you are associating with are making you feel less than your true worth, then perhaps you need to get out and meet other people, without abandoning your current circle of friends. Take a step outside of your comfort zone, maybe find some people who appreciate you more for who you are.

Other than that, just try to gain some self confidence in yourself and always strive to be a better person.

[xPANCAKEx]

Women, when they finally break a man down and get him to tell them the actual truth about how they feel, usually decide to not believe them. (This is in contrast to men, who will often choose to believe a woman even while knowing perfectly well that she's lying. "It's fine." "...Okay.")

my personal philosophy involves INTENTIONALLY taking them at their word, even when i know its a lie, so that they when they finally decide to pick a fight i can (quite rightly) say "if there was such a problem, why didn't you say when i asked first time around so we could have sorted it out then. Instead you've let it build up and made a mountain out of a mole hill... what the hell is wrong with you?"

not only does it take the focus off what i've (apparently) done wrong, but it also makes them have to evaluate if what they're trying to pick an argument over is really worth while. Also if its something pointless and not even worth arguing about, gives me perfect opertunity to walk away

remember playgrounds: never expend energy on pointless arguments. If your SO is the type that likes to pick MANY pointless arguments, you've made a poor life choice

[loopy]

remember playgrounds: never expend energy on pointless arguments. If your SO is the type that likes to pick MANY pointless arguments, you've made a poor life choice

My name is loopy, and I approve this message.

[Pyrian]

my personal philosophy involves INTENTIONALLY taking them at their word, even when i know its a lie...

That's what I wrote, isn't it? It's certainly what I meant to write, and it's how it reads to me, but if both you and MountainKing didn't catch the implication that the subtext is being intentionally ignored, clearly I did not succeed.

[xPANCAKEx]

That's what I wrote, isn't it? It's certainly what I meant to write, and it's how it reads to me, but if both you and Superglucose didn't catch the implication that the subtext is being intentionally ignored, clearly I did not succeed.

sadly i've seen far too many guys who take things at face value without realising its a lie, then become confused later down the line when things go awry