Things I May No Longer Do While Playing IV: The Decanter of Endless Bad Ideas

[DrachenGlied]

* I may not innocently ask what book the aforementioned spell is in, "For curiosity's sake."

I may not mention with complete confidence that the spell is in Pathfinder's Ultimate Magic book, and easily accessed online http://paizo.com/pathfinderRPG/prd/u...turalLust.html

[HandofCrom]

For Shadowrun:

* Plan A is not "Kick the door down and start shooting."
** Plan B is not "Drop grenades and other assorted explosives like confetti at a parade and run like the dickens."
*** Plan C is not "Start a riot."
**** Plan D is not "Start an international riot."
***** Plan E is not "Have the rigger do a bombing run on your position."

[Techwarrior]

For Shadowrun:

* Plan A is not "Kick the door down and start shooting."
** Plan B is not "Drop grenades and other assorted explosives like confetti at a parade and run like the dickens."
*** Plan C is not "Start a riot."
**** Plan D is not "Start an international riot."
***** Plan E is not "Have the rigger do a bombing run on your position."

Of course not, you need to drop Plan A to Plan E, then shift each one up a slot.

I am not refer to any character of mine that can conjure, create, evoke, manufacture, or summon fire at will a 'Live Bomb.'

The DM finding out that my character's name really means that in another language after playing for a while is considered inappropriate awesome by the DM all involved.

[Adoendithas]

* If the plan involves charging small pieces of metal with Lightning Bolt, it's not allowed.
** If the plan involves Faraday cages, it's also not allowed.
*** Same for lightning rods.
**** Just stop trying to make hydrogen already!

[Esprit15]

*AC means Armor Class, not Automatic Cannon.
**I may not have an Automatic Cannon.
***The Automatic Cannon that I do not have is not affected in any way by my AC.

Sorry, I'm used to a system where AC is Accuracy Check.

[Guizonde]

* If the plan involves charging small pieces of metal with Lightning Bolt, it's not allowed.
** If the plan involves Faraday cages, it's also not allowed.
*** Same for lightning rods.
**** Just stop trying to make hydrogen already!

now the real question is: do faraday cages affect "send" spells? second question: if you're grounded, how much boost do you gain to lightning resistance?

*soooooooo totally not allowed to test out these questions.
**even FOR SCIENCE!!
***especially if it's to ruin the BBEG's day
****doubly so if i'm a dwarf cleric, and not a dwarf engineer

[Chilingsworth]

now the real question is: do faraday cages affect "send" spells? second question: if you're grounded, how much boost do you gain to lightning resistance?

*soooooooo totally not allowed to test out these questions.
**even FOR SCIENCE!!
***especially if it's to ruin the BBEG's day
****doubly so if i'm a dwarf cleric, and not a dwarf engineer

* May not play a dwarf engineer
** especially if I name him Faraday
*** This goes double triple for gnomes.

[Wookieetank]

Things my brother has done while I've DM'd:
*May not play a gnome in a dragonlance game with a life quest of creating a mech, and succeding.
**May not then procede to have a second life quest of creating flying saucers.
***No longer allowed to liberate an abandoned mine from the critters who have taken up residence there, and then procede to use said mine for minting my own money, in order to fund my gnome experiments.

[Bacon Elemental]

-This thread is not a tutorial
-Not even for the joke campaign
-you can beleive the DM reads it and he WILL know if you use it.

[Chilingsworth]

- Of course this thread isn't a tutorial.

- It's an almanac

- The players may feel free to use it.

- But so can the DM.

[Guizonde]

- Of course this thread isn't a tutorial.

- It's an almanac

- The players may feel free to use it.

- But so can the DM.

*can't roll d20 to choose which ban i'm trolling the dm with next
**can't punish a character who rolls a natural 1 by using this list onhim

[Balmas]

*Yes, in a superhero campaign, I may base my character off Aquaman. Though why I'd want to is beyond the ken of mortal understanding.
**Yes, I can control creatures of the sea.
***...Yes, Cthulhu could be considered a creature of the sea.
****No longer allowed to play Aquaman.

[Sith_Happens]

I may not mention with complete confidence that the spell is in Pathfinder's Ultimate Magic book, and easily accessed online http://paizo.com/pathfinderRPG/prd/u...turalLust.html

* As a DM, I may not sneak a potion of this spell into the treasure pile.

[artofregicide]

* As a DM, I may not sneak a potion of this spell into the treasure pile.

As a DM, I may not make a treasure stash consisting only these potions, which are all mislabeled as potions of "Cure serious wounds".

[Guizonde]

As a DM, I may not make a treasure stash consisting only these potions, which are all mislabeled as potions of "Cure serious wounds".

*must not put the pile of loot above a warp with a brothel as destination
**you know what? banned

[Elemental]

*Yes, in a superhero campaign, I may base my character off Aquaman. Though why I'd want to is beyond the ken of mortal understanding.
**Yes, I can control creatures of the sea.
***...Yes, Cthulhu could be considered a creature of the sea.
****No longer allowed to play Aquaman.

Technically, I believe Cthulhu is a creature of the land who lived in a city on an island that sunk to the bottom of the sea...

*I may not spend my life studying the DNA of Cthulhu for the benefit of "science".
**No. Biologists do not keep Tesla coils in their laboratories!

[Milo v3]

*I may not spend my life studying the DNA of Cthulhu for the benefit of "science".
**No. Biologists do not keep Tesla coils in their laboratories!

***Biologists also do not keep God Hearts in their laboratories.
****Especially if they are atheist.
*****Even if they are Elder God Hearts (AKA Lovecraftian) rather than true Diefic hearts.

[Zahhak]

******I may not point out that Cthulhu is technically an alien, and that therefor a biologist would probably keep his various internal organs lying around.

[Chilingsworth]

* I may not play (any of) the scientist(s) that brought about the cthulhu tech universe.

** Nor may I singlehandedly bring about the Tippyverse.

-- I maynot invent breachloading artillery

--- I maynot invent DU discarding sabot rounds for my breachloading artillery.

---- Nor high explosive rounds.

----- My high explosive rounds may not be based on explosive runes and a custom item of dispel magic.

Or erase.

Or amanuensis.

[Recherché]

-The barbarian using a table as an improvised weapon is legitimate
-However tableflipping the BBEG to death is frowned upon
-I am not allowed to mithril plate the table
-Nor may I enchant it to be a +2 human-bane table
-I am now banned from taking Improvised Weapon Mastery
-Exotic Weapon Proficiency (Table) does not exist
-Tables are not martial weapons either
-All of the above also applies to chairs, folding or otherwise

[Moonwolf727]

* Even if I have him dominated, the fighter does not get a bonus for being my familiar.
** I may not make the fighter into my familiar by having him eat the previous one.
*** This goes double for the barbarian, even if they do have similar intelligence scores.
**** "What about the paladin?"
***** Not allowed familiars.

[fishjam]

*In a game of 7th sea, cannot have more skills then all the other players combined
** Even if being the skill monkey
*** Not allowed to be an ACTUAL monkey with skills

Also from this game

*Cannot speak every language in the game, just because i can speak all the real world equivellents.
**Especially if its to just make fun of the other players for there lack of language skills.

All true..

[Ksheep]

* Yeah, you could play a rogue with maxed ranks in tumble
** It's perfectly normal to tumble away when you're attacked…
*** Yes, tumbling can reduce fall damage
**** Yeah, you can name your character Wilhelm
***** NO, YOU DO NOT GET TO PLAY THE WILHELM SCREAM WHENEVER YOU TUMBLE!

[Adoendithas]

*Cannot speak every language in the game, just because i can speak all the real world equivellents.

What are the real-world equivalents of the languages in your game?

[Zahhak]

*No matter how high my regen, I may not offer myself for vivisection
**Especially if it's so I can spend time with the female mage so I can seduce her
***I may not attempt to seduce the high power female mage at all
****Especially if my reason is "to make lots of hellspawn"

* I may not attempt to seduce the villain I nearly killed and imprisoned

*If someone asks to use my sword, I may not demand sexual services in exchange

*I may not become a cult leader
**Saying "he's a glorified librarian" does not give me permission to open a portal to hell to talk to a demon
***Even if I am a demon
****Even if I am a demon and I know him
*****Especially if I joke about summoning him to Earth
******Oh, he's a 900 point build? Yeah, you are definitely not allowed to think about talking to him again

For non-Hero System users, a 900 point build is basically a demi-god. Super heroes are a 150-200 point build, 900 is basically a demi-god.

[Erik Vale]

Yeah, there is a reason summoning is banned at my table. Also, 200-350 is the superhero range, by 350 is more the save the galaxy on your own level.
However, I remembered somewhere that actual gods where 7500 points, and just bought the book and called it a day.

Some recent rulings from our hero game. [They start becoming less real after Lightsleep]

*You cant use Rapid Fire and almost all your character points to be able to Kill the BBEG in one round.
** Or Ogres, which are supposed to be party level threats.
*** Or entire rooms of creatures that aren't simply to numerous. Like A room with a small group of Ogres.
**** You are not allowed to make the entire party useless with the exception of providing travel, money for your bow, or healing.
***** You didn't pick up lightsleep right?
****** The Party can no longer have lightsleep or perception rolls greater than 14-.
******* Due to being so powerful, your city has been targetted by an orc Tribe.
******** And a Dragon.
********* No, you are not allowed to make dragon plate armour.
********** Sure your character can challenge the 1000 year old Elven Lord to an Archery challenge. He is actually a better archer than you.
*********** All NPC's have just put ranks in luck to avoid 18's.

[Hyena]

* Force lightning is not a legit way to persuade someone.
** Unless I took Force Persuasion talent, that is.
*** Not even then.
* Using Force Choke does not provide my allies morale bonus.
* Eyebrow can not be replaces with cybernethic prothesis.
** Neither can appendix.
* Pantomime is not a legit language I can take. Therefore, no mind tricking with it.

[Doorhandle]

*No longer allowed to have mud elementals challenge players to wrestling matches.

[Sith_Happens]

* Force lightning is not a legit way to persuade someone.

Spoken like someone who's never played an Inquisitor in SW:TOR.

[Ksheep]

* I may not play a Pixie who wields a Gargantuan Warhammer
** Even if it is technically possible, due to the Titan Bloodline
*** How would a Pixie even HAVE the Titan Bloodline?
**** Not allowed to answer above question, for the sake of the DMs sanity