Roll to Dodge I: Why don't we have one of these already?

[Castaras]

Not sure how many more people have actions left to do - I'll write something up on Monday, so anyone else has until then.

edit, 19th Aug: Got caught up in real world stuff, should get this sorted soon. sorry!

[AsteronIronhoof]

Would it be ok if i join in the fun?

[Tris]

Would it be ok if i join in the fun?

Go ahead and post an action!

[AsteronIronhoof]

Go ahead and post an action!

Zaphod the cyborg enderman has been on tested for months. But then all the guards leave the area to find "prisoner 0".
I attempt to use my teleporting powers to escape my maximum security cell!

[Tris]

So, what happened here?

[JBPuffin]

That, my friend, is a good question...tell you what, if everyone's posted, let's give our ally Castaras another one or two days, and on Thursday at 5 if we haven't seen hide nor hair of a narrative, I'll type something up in about 3-4 hours span. If anyone objects, I'll gladly wait for another opportunity to narrate something .

[Tris]

Sounds good to me.

[AsteronIronhoof]

So is Puffin going to narrate this round now?

[Tris]

It would seem so.

[Castaras]

Oh my gods! I'm so so sorry, I complete forgot about this. Fell ill a little bit back and this slipped my mind.

Again, really really sorry this happened. I'm a muppet at times.

[ImperatorV]

It's fine, but can someone start the next round please?

[AsteronIronhoof]

Yeah... could someone update it on the weekend or something?

[JBPuffin]

So I'm going to narrate things now, k? Let's get this show on the road (and apologies, this is Sunday not last Thursday, but now it's game day).

Note: Any narrations herein may have some unconventional uses of narrative liberty to ensure maximum modifier application. If this is not exactly kosher, let me know.

Round 16: Here's Johnny!

"Yess! Come my followers we must now-"..."-Hunt Down and Destroy this threat!"

Spoiler: The Roll

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You rolled a 1, but you're channeling awesome, so you're at 2.

Spoiler: The Outcome

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Well, your soldiers follow you to hell and back...but where is this guy? Destroying would be less of a problem if you could find him...

Hunt Prisoner 0 with my loyal spoons.

They told me I could be anything, so why not become a Spoonlord?

Spoiler: The Roll

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You rolled a 6, and since it's spoons, you're at 7.

Oh yeah, you hunted down that Prisoner 0 alright; riding your spoon like the Sliver Surfer, you locate the prisoner...and guess what, it's actually a large horde of magic spoons.

Yeah, things just got real; as your action each turn, you can order the Prisoner to hunt someone down. Your command always succeeds, but the prisoner will roll w/o bonus.

Death is no obstacle to a true master of pastry. In time, you will rise again with more dark power than ever before, I am certain of it.
That aside...

Waking up and hearing the news of a dangerous creature on the loose is never a good thing. As such, I respond instinctively and lock down all doors in order to protect myself.

Spoiler: The Roll

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You rolled a 6.

Spoiler: The Outcome

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Oh, man, did you LOCK those doors! In fact, you are actually now the king of doors; +1 to rolls involving doors.

Lena ignores the sirens and searches for people to resurrect with her new powers.

I'll narrate the round after this one.

Spoiler: The Roll

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You rolled a 5, and since it's a resurrection, total is 6.

Spoiler: The Outcome

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You found people! They are dead, but they've been in stasis in...wherever you ended up. Still on the ship, but in a very strange-looking part...oh, hey, it's the -3 sublevel! With a flick of your hand you raise them up.

"What are your orders, Commander Cat?" they ask.

You are now Commander Cat, leader of a small group of human Marines armed with...arms as of the moment.

I resurrect Cassie with pieomancy!

Spoiler: The Roll

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You rolled a 4.

Spoiler: The Outcome

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Well, good new and bad news: good news is, Cassie is alive again. Bad news is, you're kind of in a tight spot. You did kill her, after all, so you might want to explain why she's covered in large, bloody panther gashes. And a pie.

The blaring alarms wake up a prisoner who for some reason had been sleeping in a storeroom instead of a cell. After being jolted awake, I am not very happy. I summon the hordes of the abyss.

Spoiler: The Roll

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You rolled a 3.

Spoiler: The Outcome

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You didn't summon the hordes per say, just an imp. Said imp isn't friendly, though...Roll to Dodge!

Spoiler: Roll to Dodge!

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You rolled a 1...oh, that's bad. He may or may not have eaten your soul. You're still alive, but...yeah, that's bad. -1 to rolls requiring a soul.

Oh for goodness' sake...

Mendevelyx picks up the nearest object and bludgeons the stupid rogue mechadendrite in frustration.

((I have to roll okay sooner or later on this task.))

Spoiler: The Roll

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You rolled a 6.

Spoiler: The Outcome

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You hit it; in fact, you hit it so well, it takes the torch and welds itself to your arm! Boy, you sure are scary. +1 to rolls involving taming rogue mechadendrites.

I command some aliens to detain Prisoner zero in an isolated cell with high security.

Spoiler: The Roll

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You rolled a 5.

Spoiler: The Outcome

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Well, Yumori took it over, but let's see what happens. Roll to Dodge for the Hunter: 4. You managed to get it into a cell, but it looks like it'll be able to escape if he gets some help. Your followers seem okay with blasting it if things get that bad, though.

Zaphod the cyborg enderman has been on tested for months. But then all the guards leave the area to find "prisoner 0".
I attempt to use my teleporting powers to escape my maximum security cell!

Spoiler: The Roll

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You rolled a 1.

Spoiler: The Outcome

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Are you sure you're an enderman? I mean, you're definitely a cyber-organic organism, but you can't remember if you're really an enderman. -1 to future teleportation attempts.

Spoiler: Stats

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Spoiler: Rain Dragon, a.k.a. Mendevelyx

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Spoiler: Status

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Condition normal. In Fabrication Facility A-7.

Spoiler: Abilities

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Reasonably observant.

Spoiler: Gear

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A jar of peanuts.
A note with the passcode to his cell.
The Great Attractor's Toy Ball.
Files on himself. And everyone else on board.
Mechadendrite, once it is produced and received from Fabrication Facility A-7.
A large quantity of materials with which to build... whatever.
An intimidated mech-tentacle. Will fight to avoid your ire.

Spoiler: Notable Feats

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Utterly destroyed an alien armory without even trying.
Hacked... identities.
Narrated Round 5 spectacularly.
Hacked... the security systems.
Translated the labels in Fabrication Facility A-6.
Built a robotic tentacle limb thingy! ...that turned hostile...and then was intimidated into submission.

Spoiler: Modifiers

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+1 to all hacking rolls.
+1 to all attack rolls against other PCs (Player Character, not Personal Computer).
+1 to rolls involving taming rogue mechadendrites.

Spoiler: Duck999

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Spoiler: Status

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Condition nauseous but normal. Standing next to Yumori in front of the Spoon Swarm's cell.

Spoiler: Abilities

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Has mind-control vomit, and the charisma to be the new leader of a UFO religion!

Spoiler: Gear

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A pair of mind-controlled alien followers, who desire to make Duck999 into their God. The religion has spread to half the aliens on the ship. Those that forgot they were animate are animate again.
Every translator on board the ship.
An animate alien flower follower.

Spoiler: Notable Feats

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Hypnotized an alien with vomit.
Started a new UFO religion, which has since spread majorly.
Narrated the heck out of round 3.
Hoarded all the translators. All of them.
Discovered why we are on a spaceship.
Became ambassador from Earth to the aliens.
Ate an apple, purely so he could vomit once more.
Gourded a large number of followers... and later ungourded them.
Slowed down a homicidal swarm of spoons.

Spoiler: Modifiers

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+1 to all hypno-vomit rolls.
+1 to diplomatic rolls.
+1 to next defense roll against this species of aliens.

Spoiler: Rater202, a.k.a. Chris

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Spoiler: Status

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Condition normal. On a space ship.

Spoiler: Abilities

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Can clip his fingernails psionically.
Has incredible power over electromagnetism, fingernails, bad cosplay, and awesome.

Spoiler: Gear

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30-40 alien followers.
A stainless steel paperclip.
A contingent of soldier-priests that he resurrected.

Spoiler: Notable Feats

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Became Magneto.
Is a god of electromagnetism, fingernails, bad cosplay, and awesome with his own alien followers.
Liquified a random alien.
Narrated the mystery round (10).
Recruited a large number of alien followers by interrupting their lunch break.
Became overwhelmingly awesome before he brought it under control.
Resurrected a contingent of soldiers with pure awesome.
Failed to locate the prisoner with his friends, even channeling awesomeness...

Spoiler: Modifiers

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+1 to rolls involving magnetic forces.
+1 to rolls involving channeling awesome.

Spoiler: Zar Peter

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Spoiler: Status

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Condition normal. In the shuttle bay, which now has no shuttles.

Spoiler: Abilities

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Can aim at and accurately shoot doves from a spaceship that's nowhere near Earth.
Can transform objects with his nano-probes, as long as he still has his rifle.

Spoiler: Gear

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A highly advanced alien nano-rifle.

Spoiler: Notable Feats

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Wiped out the dove species.
Resistance is Futile.
Fixed a shuttle with his nano-rifle.

Spoiler: Modifiers

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+1 to all rolls involving shooting something.
Shooting something always modifies it in some way, positively or negatively.

Spoiler: Saposhiente

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Spoiler: Status

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Condition normal. Married to the leader of the alien spaceship she's on.

Spoiler: Abilities

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None yet.

Spoiler: Gear

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An alien spouse and the spaceship it commands.
A level 3 security keycard which grants access to the ship's protected memory cores.

Spoiler: Notable Feats

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Married an alien.
Took control of an alien spaceship.
Slept their way to the top.

Spoiler: Modifiers

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+1 to seduction rolls.

Spoiler: Disc Lorde

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Spoiler: Status

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Condition normal. In a circular room with six doors. Door 1 is a supply room. Door 2 is a closet. Door 3 is an empty storage closet. Door 4 is a treasure trove! Doors 5 and 6 have not been opened.

Spoiler: Abilities

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None yet.

Spoiler: Gear

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Keys that don't work on his cell.
Pair of tweezers.
A large diamond.
The key to the door he tried to open earlier.

Spoiler: Notable Feats

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Disarmed every cell on an alien spaceship using only a pair of tweezers.
Thinks he isn't hallucinating. He may or may not be hallucinating.
Broke out of prison. Twice.
Narrated Round 8 into Round 7.
Found a supply room, two closets, and a treasure trove.

Spoiler: Modifiers

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-1 to all roles to escape.
Automatic access to any item he wants, provided it's in the treasure trove's inventory.

Spoiler: Askthepizzaguy

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Spoiler: Status

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Condition normal. Wandering freely on an alien spaceship. Friends with an alien.

Spoiler: Abilities

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Scrambled brains, now with real psychic powers!

Spoiler: Gear

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A translation device.
Armour and a weapon - Description.
A Sunkern.

Spoiler: Notable Feats

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Narrated the heck out of Round 2.
Freed Cuthalion of his own volition.
Caused human militaries to kill each other.

Spoiler: Modifiers

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-1 to all roles involving assistance from aliens

Spoiler: Crimson Doom

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Spoiler: Status

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Condition normal. In a fighter-ship and connected to the main ship, which is currently traveling to the Pokemon homeworld.

Spoiler: Abilities

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Can control alien spacecraft with his mind.

Spoiler: Gear

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A Sylveon, Lvl 9, with a Bold Nature and knows Tackle, Growl, and Fairy Wind. Its name is Cassie.
A fighter-ship he controls.
Pies. Many, many pies.

Spoiler: Notable Feats

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Narrated the heck out of Rounds 1 and 6.
Discovered how to control alien spacecraft.
Set the ship's course to the Pokemon homeworld.

Spoiler: Modifiers

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None yet.

Spoiler: Count Dingdong, a.k.a. Aaron

Show

Spoiler: Status

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Condition liquid. Just outside a holding cell on an alien spaceship. In a liquid state, but human shape. Wiht an arm blade. And wings.

Spoiler: Abilities

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Has the power to melt into a puddle of liquid metal, and only recently formed back into a solid shape.
Formed a very sharp arm blade. He then formed wings, which grant him the aerial ability of the average bird.

Spoiler: Gear

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None yet.

Spoiler: Notable Feats

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Inadvertently transformed self into a puddle.
Narrated Round 4 into mediocrity.
Somehow formed into human shape once more.
Brought numbers back with Round 11, and brought the stats up-to-date as well!
Narrated Round 14 by process of elimination.
Sprouted wings and flew.

Spoiler: Modifiers

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-1 to all rolls involving interaction with solid objects.

Spoiler: Tanar Aerdoth, a.k.a. Lena

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Spoiler: Status

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Condition cat, which is normal. Now in the alien spaceship.

Spoiler: Abilities

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Can charm aliens to her side through cuteness and pity.
Is incredibly adorable.
Can manipulate the Elemental Forces of Light and Darkness.
One of these powers is jumping between shadows and between light.
Can resurrect nigh anything.

Spoiler: Gear

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Sixteen lives?
An army of human marines armed with arms.

Spoiler: Notable Feats

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Charmed an alien into letting her free.
Narrated the heck out of rounds 7 and 12.
Died by shoe. Fortunately has eight more lives.
Crossed realities by failing. Spectacularly.
Entered a dark universe, was confronted by a shadow self, and absorbed it, thus surviving to tell the tale.
Learned how to jump between shadows.
Created a portal between the light and dark worlds, in front of her house.
Merged with her lightself as well.
Found people to resurrect and became Commander Cat.

Spoiler: Modifiers

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-1 penalty to rolls involving the escape from an alien smitten by your incredible cuteness.
+1 bonus to rolls to manipulate light or darkness.
+1 to all rolls involving resurrection (this includes yourself).

Spoiler: Cuthalion

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Spoiler: Status

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Condition panther. Being threatened by a sentient pie.

Spoiler: Abilities

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Can transform back and forth between panther and human.
Can shoot lasers from his eyes, at least while a panther.
Has telescopic X-ray vision.
Can turn people into pies.

Spoiler: Gear

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A variety of pies.

Spoiler: Notable Feats

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Failed to teleport.
Ate an entire cherry pie.
Momentarily became a dragon.
Became a panther.
Dodged a ray gun.
Mauled Castaras' dead body.
Turned Castaras into a bloody pie. At least he's alive again.

Spoiler: Modifiers

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+1 to transformation rolls.
+1 to dodge Castaras's next volley of pies.
+1 to attack rolls.

Spoiler: Reinholdt

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Spoiler: Status

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Condition normal. In a bathroom. Well-rested, exercised, and showered.

Spoiler: Abilities

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None yet.

Spoiler: Gear

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An empty tray.

Spoiler: Notable Feats

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Recreated the scene from Rocky.

Spoiler: Modifiers

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None yet.

Spoiler: Castaras

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Spoiler: Status

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A pie. In an alien laboratory, on top of a giant pancake, covered in injuries.

Spoiler: Abilities

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Pieomancy.

Spoiler: Gear

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Not an oven.
Mind control pie, which will mind control the person who eats it.
Two mind controlled alien followers.
Alien science equipment and texts.
Pies, tarts, and flans, which she baked.

Spoiler: Notable Feats

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Took over the cult of the Hypnoduck.
Threw pies for maximum chaos.
Attacked Cuthalion with pies.
The first person to die.
Smothered himself beneath a giant pancake.
Alive, but now a sentient pie.

Spoiler: Modifiers

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+1 to pie baking. An extra +1 if it's competitive.
+1 to chemistry.

Spoiler: JBPuffin

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Spoiler: Status

Show

Condition normal.

Spoiler: Abilities

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None yet.

Spoiler: Gear

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A Kuriboh trading card.
A deck of Yu-gi-oh cards, complete with a functional duel disk.
A loyal Blue Eyes White Dragon
A Kuriboh that may or may not follow orders

Spoiler: Notable Feats

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Reached across time, space, and dimensions.
Summoned a Blue Eyes White Dragon! ...that was hostile but brought it under control.
Helped slap aliens back to animation.
Narrated Round 16 after a self-caused delay.

Spoiler: Modifiers

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+1 to dodges against Blue Eyes White Dragon.
+1 to rolls to command Yu-Gi-Oh monsters.

Spoiler: lolthfollower

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Spoiler: Status

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Condition GODLIKE. On a barren planet.

Spoiler: Abilities

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Telekinetic powers.
Time travel.

Spoiler: Gear

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An escape pod.

Spoiler: Notable Feats

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Developed telekinesis.
Traveled back in time to make up for a wasted round.
Created a robotic suit of armor that is running around attacking people.
Blasted off on an escape pod.
Became the god of an alien planet.

Spoiler: Modifiers

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+1 to all rolls involving telekinesis.
-1 to constructing electronics.
+1 to controlling his escape pod.
+1 to all rolls involving this planet. (This does not count rolls that were undertaken on the planet but that otherwise have no connection to the planet.)

Spoiler: Elemental

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Spoiler: Status

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Has amnesia. Permanently in mental control of an alien ship ...with Crimson Doom as co-pilot.

Spoiler: Abilities

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Mental contact with Crimson Doom and the alien's main ship.

Spoiler: Gear

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None yet.

Spoiler: Notable Feats

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Before doing an action, helpfully took over Round 8 9's narration!
Mentally connected to the main ship.
Set up a firewall to prevent access to the main computers! (5+ to access; success sparks a battle)
Was overloaded by the ship's database.
Narrated the heck out of Round 13.
Became the King of Doors.

Spoiler: Modifiers

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-1 to telepathic abilities until you get your memories back.
+1 to rolls involving doors.

Spoiler: Yumori123

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Spoiler: Status

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Next to Duck999 by Prisoner 0's temporary prison.

Spoiler: Abilities

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Spoonokinesis.

Spoiler: Gear

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A magical spoon.
A large spoon where the heart should be.
Prisoner 0 (as your action, sick the spoon swarm on a person).

Spoiler: Notable Feats

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Successfully sleepwalked to retrieve a magical spoon.
Had a weird dream about sacrificing a magical goat to a normal spoon.
Sacrificed self to a spoon and somehow gained spoon powers as a result.
In control of the legendary spoon-swarm Prisoner 0.

Spoiler: Modifiers

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+1 to all rolls involving spoons.

Spoiler: AsteronIronhoof

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Spoiler: Status

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Having an identity crisis.

Spoiler: Abilities

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??? Not teleportation, apparently.

Spoiler: Gear

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None.

Spoiler: Notable Feats

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Initiated a psychological deconstruction of himself.

Spoiler: Modifiers

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-1 to future attempts at teleportation.

Let me know if I missed anything, guys. Back to the game!

Also, just a heads up: whoever narrates next round, could y'all have me attempt my Kuriboh multiplication plan? I'll repost it if y'all need me to.

[Tris]

As I said, I'll be narrating this round.

[Crimson Doom]

Okay, so those pies were delicious, but Cassie and I can't possibly eat them all. I'm gonna attempt to find a fridge or something else I can store the pies in so that they won't spoil.

[AsteronIronhoof]

Huh. I guess the electronics are scrambling with my teleportation... or something? No time to hypothesize! I hack into the plasma door(I AM kind of a robot...) to open the cell!

[Cuthalion]

I heal Castaras with the power of PIIEEE

[SpeedWitch]

I strip and look for the slipperiest substance I can find in my cell, then cover myself in it and attempt to slip through the bars of my prison.

[ImperatorV]

Ok, so I don't have a soul. Or have only part of a soul. Whatever. I feel strangely apathetic about this loss. In fact, emotion in general seems like a lot of work, I probably shouldn't bother with that. However, I am hungry. Hungry... for life force.

I set out to devour the life force of nearby beings.

[Duck999]

I politely ask one of the alien followers to get me an anti magic pistol.

[Rain Dragon]

Mendevelyx carries out some ship maintanence then.

((Finally.... Mechadendrite... On the arm, unfortunately, but /attached/ at last))

[JBPuffin]

Mendevelyx carries out some ship maintanence then.

((Finally.... Mechadendrite... On the arm, unfortunately, but /attached/ at last))

Wait, you didn't want it on your arm? Next one goes on your back, I guess.

[Disc Lorde]

Hello, I'm back. In game, let's say I was playing some cool video games I found in the treasure trove, and didn't hear the alarm because I was wearing headphones. That actually makes a lot of sense. Now let's see here...

Oh, man, did you LOCK those doors! In fact, you are actually now the king of doors; +1 to rolls involving doors.

Okay, I unlock every cell door and do nothing but do stuff with doors for every single round I play after the first one, and this guy gets lucky once and suddenly he's the king of doors?!

I go to Elemental and demand he share his door dominion with me.

[Rain Dragon]

Wait, you didn't want it on your arm? Next one goes on your back, I guess.

((Heheh, don't mind me. I imagine he'll get used to the extra weight there. I can imagine it looks really cool, though.))

[JBPuffin]

Yeah, he can definitely still use that arm. It just, you know, has a tentacle on the elbow. For protection. That totally makes sense. it doesn't

[Rater202]

Chris tries to find evidence of the prisoner's location.

[Rain Dragon]

Yeah, he can definitely still use that arm. It just, you know, has a tentacle on the elbow. For protection. That totally makes sense. it doesn't

((Elbow? /concerned))

Mendevelyx works on enhancing his arm with various bits and pieces lying around the facility so he can use both it and the mechadendrite decently.

[Elemental]

Safe and secure and surrounded by locked doors, I enter a trance and attempt to regain my lost memories.

[Castaras]

I strangle Cuthalion.

[Yumori Zatsuken]

I command Prisoner 0 to attack Duck999 and his minions!