An Old Question has been answered: Rich Burlew is NOT a hack.

[Ghost Nappa]

Yesterday, a friend of mine discovered a terrifying scientific announcement made in the middle of 2015.

Acid-breathing Sharks are apparently real.

Apparently, the chaos and wonder that is real life made them first. Not exactly as imagined, but still.

The jury is out on acid-breathing piranhas that show up in avoidable traps for calendar landscapes however.


This had been another daily Science Bulletin.

[KorvinStarmast]

Yesterday, a friend of mine discovered a terrifying scientific announcement made in the middle of 2015.

Acid-breathing Sharks are apparently real.

Apparently, the chaos and wonder that is real life made them first. Not exactly as imagined, but still.

Note leading the article says:
Scientists astonished to see hardy hammerheads 'hanging out' in conditions which would kill a human

Actually, they should not be astonished. Day in and day out hammerheads hang out in conditions which would kill a human: underwater all day having to use gills to "breath" at all.

[Mad Humanist]

Note leading the article says:
Scientists astonished to see hardy hammerheads 'hanging out' in conditions which would kill a human

Actually, they should not be astonished. Day in and day out hammerheads hang out in conditions which would kill a human: underwater all day having to use gills to "breath" at all.

Now really scaring would be the air-breathing sharks.

[rodneyAnonymous]

Actually, they should not be astonished. Day in and day out hammerheads hang out in conditions which would kill a human: underwater all day having to use gills to "breath" at all.

That's really funny.

[Chronos]

Don't forget that it's not just acid, it's scalding-hot acid inside a volcano. So not just an acidborne shark, but frighteningly close to a lavaborne shark.

[Ghost Nappa]

Don't forget that it's not just acid, it's scalding-hot acid inside a volcano. So not just an acidborne shark, but frighteningly close to a lavaborne shark.

And we didn't even need magic to do it.

[137beth]

Wow. Dungeonscape was already one of my favorite D&D books, but it just got pushed up in my personal rankings

[ChillerInstinct]

Don't forget that it's not just acid, it's scalding-hot acid inside a volcano. So not just an acidborne shark, but frighteningly close to a lavaborne shark.

...That is seriously uncanny.

That video footage is pretty freaking unreal, too. The world is a strange, wonderful place, isn't it?

[Trixie]

Note leading the article says:
Scientists astonished to see hardy hammerheads 'hanging out' in conditions which would kill a human

Actually, they should not be astonished. Day in and day out hammerheads hang out in conditions which would kill a human: underwater all day having to use gills to "breath" at all.

Yeah. In addition, the website is Mirror, kind of garbage tabloid if my memories from UK are to be trusted. Let's see, from cursory reading, things that are wrong: A) volcanoes don't spew acid. What they do is release sulphur that forms very weak acidic solution in salty water before being mixed away by currents. Really, go to mineral spa springs and you can be "acid immune" too. B) volcanoes are hot, yes, but the caldera is pretty deep and that dense fluid (that, surprise surprise, seas are made of) on top of it happens to be excellent thermal conductor. No, really, it take immense amount of energy to heat water just 1 degree C, and salty water is if anything denser and has lower viscosity and resistance, losing heat to surrounding cold sea even faster. Seeing shark skin (and especially eyes) aren't especially immune to protein denaturation I bet they swim in water no warmer than tropical sea in sunny summer day. Which seems to be about right, seeing volcano is located in tropics, so this is probably normal or at worst tolerable environment for any sea animal.

I also like them misquoting scientists talking about it. "Now I want to spend years trying to study that and why that is the case" makes it sound like something astonishing, but what they meant was studying food chain and what kind of food the sharks preferred, seeing we know so little about them. If you want truly extreme environment, shallow volcano is easily beaten by hydrothermal vent, specifically 'black smokers', something so extreme it really emits superheated, supercritical acids at pressure that would instantly crush 20 cm thick hardened steel hull of nuclear submarine, never mind a mere shark. Sadly, you can't make pretty pictures there so it's ignored by media despite really strange, alien life forms more resembling something you can find on Venus than on Earth living there...

Now really scaring would be the air-breathing sharks.

Can I kindly inquire what it is you think fish are breathing, then?

[littlebum2002]

Can I kindly inquire what it is you think fish are breathing, then?

Oxygen, not air.

[Pyrous]

A) volcanoes don't spew acid. What they do is release sulphur that forms very weak acidic solution in salty water before being mixed away by currents. Really, go to mineral spa springs and you can be "acid immune" too.

Can you breath the acid water in mineral spa springs?

[Wardog]

Yeah. In addition, the website is Mirror, kind of garbage tabloid if my memories from UK are to be trusted. Let's see, from cursory reading, things that are wrong:
A) volcanoes don't spew acid.
B) volcanoes are hot, yes, but the caldera is pretty deep
I also like them misquoting scientists talking about it.

Don't forget the "Artist's impression of a volcano-dwelling shark" that's just a photo of a shark photoshopped with a photo of a volcanic eruption.

[Bulldog Psion]

First of all, the picture in that article is so moronic that it's almost hilarious. Almost.

Secondly, though other people have already shredded this for the complete tosh it is, I thought I'd take a jab at it also -- specifically, why would a shark that lives in extremely hot water (if it did) "terrifying"?

Either the shark is "terrifying" because it's attacking one, or it isn't. The temperature of water it lives in is moot; a shark living in boiling water wouldn't be any more terrifying, one would think, than one in room temperature water.

After all, the last I checked, humans don't defend themselves from shark attack by heating the water around them, so the shark is no more or less alarming than any other.

I almost forgot how utterly annoying I find tabloid-style articles like these. Ugh.

[Hamste]

First of all, the picture in that article is so moronic that it's almost hilarious. Almost.

Secondly, though other people have already shredded this for the complete tosh it is, I thought I'd take a jab at it also -- specifically, why would a shark that lives in extremely hot water (if it did) "terrifying"?

Either the shark is "terrifying" because it's attacking one, or it isn't. The temperature of water it lives in is moot; a shark living in boiling water wouldn't be any more terrifying, one would think, than one in room temperature water.

After all, the last I checked, humans don't defend themselves from shark attack by heating the water around them, so the shark is no more or less alarming than any other.

I almost forgot how utterly annoying I find tabloid-style articles like these. Ugh.

If anything they are less terrifying as the extremely hot water would probably be more likely to kill you than a shark would.

[Malfarian]

And we didn't even need magic to do it.

Just because you understand it doesn't mean it's not magic.

[King of Nowhere]

yes, well, as others have mentioned, it's "dilute acidic solution that is much less acidic than many drinks", not "acidic to the point of dealing 10d6 damage in one round". Actually, 10d6 acid damage per round is a gross exaggeration anyway, unless we're talking about superacids - but that's stuff that you can only make in a specialized lab.

Anyway, that shark is missing a laser beam on its head; that's somewhat disappointing

[littlebum2002]

Here you go guys. This is a much better article on the subject.

Actually, 10d6 acid damage per round is a gross exaggeration anyway, unless we're talking about superacids - but that's stuff that you can only make in a specialized lab.

Just curious, is a superacid canceled out by a Super Bass?

[Peelee]

Just curious, is a superacid canceled out by a Super Bass?

I enjoyed the joke, until I discovered it was a Nicki Minaj song. Now I feel nothing but a yearning for vengeance.