Favorite Quotes

[Telonius]

"Lord, what fools these mortals be"- Puck, a midsummer nights dream

Trivia: this quote appears on the statue of Puck in front of the Folger Library in Washington DC. The statue is positioned to face the US Capitol building, across the street.

[Mephisto]

Trivia: this quote appears on the statue of Puck in front of the Folger Library in Washington DC. The statue is positioned to face the US Capitol building, across the street.

Lest we forget....

[smart thog]

Trivia: this quote appears on the statue of Puck in front of the Folger Library in Washington DC. The statue is positioned to face the US Capitol building, across the street.

I did not know that.


OOTS quotes

"Nobody looks back on their life when they are dying and says "I wish I spent more time on petty revenge"." - Eugene Greenhilt

"I don't trust you enough to believe you lied." - Belkar Bitterleaf

"When faced with your own imminent destruction, you have no choice but to consider whats best for the next generation." - Right-Eye

"Belkar is a vile little creature. He has no sense of manners, is completely amoral, laughs at the pains of others, and has no mental faculties that would compare favorably to that of a table. Yet I find that I still prefer him to you."- Vaarsuvius

[MisterSaturnine]

"In dreams the truth is learned that all good works are done in the absence of a caress." --Leonard Cohen

And my current favorite song, Starving in the Belly of a Whale by Tom Waits. All of it.

[Ganurath]

"CHEESE FOR EVERYONE!!!" - Sheogorath

You can pretty much take any quote from the Shivering Isles and put it in here, pretty much, whether you want funny:

"Ah, yes, I guess it would be difficult to read the Master's instructions without pictures." -Haskill

Or inspirational:

"Don't think about it; DREAM about it." - High Priest of Mania

Or just plain weird:

"Clouds don't smell. They taste of butter. And tears." - Sheogorath again.

[MeklorIlavator]

Here's and interesting pair:
"What this country needs is a short, victorious war to stem the tide of revolution"
-V.K. Plehve, Russian minister of the interior on the eve of the Russo-Japanese War(1903)

"The belief in the possibility of a short decisive war appears to be one of the most ancient and dangerous of human illusions"
-Robert Lynd, 1879-1949

These are just some one's I thought were interesting:
Sometimes I lie awake at night and I ask, "Why me?", then a voice answers "Nothing personal, your name just happened to come up."
-- Charlie Brown

"What is a drop of rain, compared to the storm? What is a thought, compared to a mind? Our unity is full of wonder, which your tiny individualism cannot even conceive."
-The Many

"Mistrust is the tyranny of the individual. Your own kind sees you as a threat. Why do you murder our unity? No matter. The line is drawn. You will cease to be. It is just a question of who will bring your end. Us, or you."
-The Many

"That's not to say I disparage the religious impulse. I think the impulse is a critical part of the wonder and awe that human beings feel. What I am against is organised religion of the sort which persecutes people who don't believe. I'm against religious intolerance."
Philip Pullman, on his Dark Materials Trilogy

"Hard, yes! Observe the hardness, write it down in careful runes. Now sing of wall! Sing!" Beowulf, from Grendel, by John Gardner

"And on the pedestal these words appear:
"My name is Ozymandias, king of kings:
Look on my works, ye mighty, and despair!"
Nothing beside remains: round the decay
Of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare,
The lone and level sands stretch far away."
"Ozymandias", Percy Bysshe Shelley

[Celitholar]

"As far as I'm concerned, if something is so complicated that you can't explain it in 10 seconds, then it's probably not worth knowing anyway."

"Childhood is for spoiling adulthood."

"History is the fiction we invent to persuade ourselves that events are knowable and that life has order and direction. That's why events are always reinterpreted when values change. We need new versions of history to allow for our current prejudices."

"I wonder if you can refuse to inherit the world."

"In my opinion, we don't devote nearly enough scientific research to finding a cure for jerks."

"It's only work if somebody makes you do it."

"Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us."

"The problem with people is that they don't look at the big picture. Eventually, we're each going to die, our species will go extinct, the sun will explode, and the universe will collapse. Existence isn't only temporary, it's pointless! We're all doomed, and worse, nothing matters!"
-Calvin, from Calvin And Hobbes\

Calvin: Dad, where do babies come from?
Calvin's Dad: Most people just go to Sears, buy the assembly kit, and read the instructions.
Calvin: I CAME FROM SEARS?!?!
Dad: No, you were a Blue Light Special at Kmart. Almost as good, and a lot cheaper.
Calvin: AAUUGHHH!
Calvin's Mom: Dear, what are you telling him now?!

Calvin: When I grow up, I'm not going to read the newspaper and I'm not going to follow complex issues and I'm not going to vote. That way I can complain when the government doesn't represent me. Then, when everything goes down the tubes, I can say the system doesn't work and justify my further lack of participation.
Hobbes: An ingeniously self-fulfilling plan.
Calvin: It's a lot more fun to blame things than to fix them.

Calvin's Dad: This year, I thought we'd just keep the tree in the garage.
Calvin: In the GARAGE?!
Calvin's Dad: Sure. You can go out and look at it whenever you want, and it saves all the trouble of decorating it.
Calvin: We're not going to DECORATE it?!
Calvin's Dad: Why bother? We just take it all down in two weeks. On Christmas Day, if you get a present…
Calvin: IF I get A present?!
Calvin's Dad: …you can take it out to the garage to open, and pretend the tree has lots of lights and…
Calvin: MOM!
Calvin's Mom: I know somebody who's going to get a lot of coal in his stocking, buster.
Calvin's Dad: The season gets less jolly every year.

To name a few.

[RandomNPC]

"I've had this nightmare before."

"It's ok! I'm a leaf on the wind!"

"Death can not take what may eternal lie,
And when strange eons pass even death may die"

42

[Icewalker]

This would be better placed in the 'coming in at an awkward moment in a conversation' thread that was up here a while ago, but what the hell, I need to put it somewhere.

"They come check to make sure there are no dead pigs falling into our lube tanks."

From a family friend who works at a place that produces machine grease, this grease is used in factories that produce food, so the grease has to meet food standards and be edible in case some gets into the food. However this also means it must be kosher, and the Islam equivalent of kosher (I forget what it is called), so a rabbi comes and checks out the plant, which was somewhat laughed at and questioned, and the quote happened. Yeah...

[Shademan]

Mads Eriksen quotes:

"i love this job!"

"ACTION FIGUREEES!!!"

"better take it like a man."

[Milanius]

"Life's a bitch and then, you die" - Shane MacGowan, "Hells Ditch"
"Oh my god, you killed Kenny! YOU BASTARDS!!!!" - Stan Marsh and Kyle Broflowsky, "Southpark"

[Quincunx]

Trivia: this quote appears on the statue of Puck in front of the Folger Library in Washington DC. The statue is positioned to face the US Capitol building, across the street.

I will never again complain about the National Endowment for the Arts being a waste of taxpayer dollars.

[Supagoof]

Last night, Darth Vader came down from planet Vulcan and told me that if I didn't take Lorraine out that he'd melt my brain. George McFly - Back To The Future

Napalm, son. Nothing in the world smells like that. I love the smell of napalm in the morning Kilgore - Apocalypse Now

You see things and you say why? But I dream of things that never were, and say why not? George Bernard Shaw

That ain't no etch-a-sketch. This is one doodle that can't be un-did, homeskillet Rollo - Juno

Bulletproof cup, huh? I invented this gag, Rabbit. Only in my day, the rookie got naked. And we also used blanks. You're a sick mother-effer, Mac. Captain O Hagan - Super Troopers

But our shenanigans are cheeky and fun! - Mac
Yeah, and his shenanigans are cruel and tragic. - Thorny *referring to Farva*
Which... makes them not really shenanigans at all. - Foster
Evil shenanigans! - Mac
I swear to God I'm going to pistol whip the next guy who says, " Shenanigans." - Captain O Hagan
Hey Farva what's the name of that restaurant you like with all the goofy stuff on the walls and the mozzarella sticks? - Mac
You mean Shenanigans? - Farva
OOOOOOOOOOOOOO. - Mac & Thorny *as they hand the Captain their pistols*[/I] - Super Troopers

Don't Hate. There's too much of that in this world already. Try dislike instead, then you can change your mind later if you want. - Grandparent Supagoof

If someone put it together, then you can take it apart. If you can take it apart, then you can put it back together again. - Father Supagoof

Find a job you love, and you'll never work a day in your life. - Unknown

[smart thog]

Dorktower qoutes

"No matter what happens, you have to throw your self into life and live it. After all, what is the alternative" -Gilly

"Life, death, diceless roleplaying systems. They all make sense." -Ken, after getting a near death sugar high from a Igor bar

"Although, it was only fruitcake, I expected the same reaction anyways." -Igor

"I wanna be a muskrat"-Carson the muskrat

"Mommas, don't let your babies grow up to be fanboys" -Matt

"My brother is a drop out, has no job, and is a stoner." "Hey Loser!" "Also, he's not a gamer" -Matt and his brother

[Nightwing]

...sure it does. It ties in with the whole 'take off your glasses, let down your hair and open you're top button and you'll be hot' theory.

Oh, I have to try that....

"Were is my clock?"- Picasso's last words.

[Fester]

"A facility for quotation covers the absence of original thought"
Dorothy L Sayers

[Shraik]

"Once. My Tv didn't work. So I kicked it. Then it worked again." -Deadpool

"I know what I want but I just don't know...how to...well...go about gettin' it"
-Jimi Hendrix

"Simple. Fear is like a bug, and you are the exterminator and perserverance the pesticide. Only the exterminator can get rid of the bugs with the pesticide. You can't stop with the pesticide either, or more bugs will keep coming."

[Lady Tialait]

"You have mettled in the forces of nature, and you will atone!" -The head of the Network, in Network.


"When I had kids, I said to myself 'I better assign them a mathimatical equation' so, you being my first, I decide 'E = MC 2' then you'd have infinate energy, but my mistake is that you tend to blow up" - My Dad.


"WINDMILLS DO NOT WORK THAT WAY" Morbo.

[KindaChang]

"Rely on your gift alone and you're gonna fail. You gotta develop yourself. The secret is confidence and concentration. You got them, you don't need much else." -Ed Hobbs, The Natural

"Having dreams is what makes life tolerable." -Pete, Rudy

"You miss 100% of the shots you never take." -Wayne "The Great One" Gretzky

[McMindflayer]

... You want Quotes? I have A Word document that is 46 pages full of quotes. I'll just toss down the first page for now.

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Gabriel: I'm getting so fed up with you.
Human women: Go to Hell!!
Gabriel: Heaven, darling, Heaven. At least get the zip code right.

"I always knew these pointy little buggers meant trouble"

"I'd rather be ashes than dust." --Jack London

Now how did the machines know what Tasty Wheat tasted like,huh? Maybe they got it wrong. Maybe what I think Tasty Wheat tasted like actually tasted like, uh...Oatmeal or Tuna fish. That makes you wonder about a lot of things. You take chicken for example. Maybe they couldn't tell what to make chicken taste like which is why chicken tastes like everything!

"Those who always spew others quotes have no real thoughts of their own"

Anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job.
-The Restaurant at the End of the Universe

The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

Did you know that dolphins are so smart that within a few weeks of captivity, they can train people to stand on the very edge of the pool and throw them fish?

It's a bird, it's a plane, it's a... no, no, it's a bird.

Contrary to popular belief, a barrel full of monkeys isn't fun at all, and is in fact quite horrifying.

It's a good thing we have gravity, or else when birds die they would just stay right up there. Hunters would get all confused.

Never insult an alligator until after you have crossed the river.

"Some things are true whether you believe them or not."

Kevin Lomax: "What about love?"
John Milton: "Overrated. Biochemically no different from eating large quantities of chocolate."

Today is the first day of the rest of my life.... how much can they expect on my first day?

“I’ve been thinking how wonderful it would be if all people renounced violence forever…. If nobody else was violent, I could conquer the whole stupid planet with just a butter knife.” – Dogbert, Dilberts dog.

To laugh is to risk appearing a fool,
To weep is to risk appearing sentimental.
To reach out to another is to risk involvement,
To expose feelings is to risk exposing your true self.
To place your ideas and dreams before a crowd is to risk their loss.
To love is to risk not being loved in return,
To live is to risk dying,
To hope is to risk despair,
To try is to risk failure.
But risks must be taken because the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing.
The person who risks nothing, does nothing, has nothing, is nothing.
He may avoid suffering and sorrow,
But he cannot learn, feel, change, grow or live.
Chained by his servitude he is a slave who has forfeited all freedom.
Only a person who risks is free.
The pessimist complains about the wind;
The optimist expects it to change;
And the realist adjusts the sails.
--William Arthur Ward

[Hell Puppi]

Okay, these are all coming from the same book, Watership Down, by Richard adams:

"Do I take every offer that a general makes me, offering to sacrifice his life for that of his troops? When a mother offers her life for that of her children? No, El-Hrairah. What is is what must be." -Black Rabbit of Inle (this one was from memory, so it may not be the exact words)

". . . . All the world will be your enemy, Prince with a Thousand Enemies and whenever they catch you, they will kill you. But first they must catch you, digger, listener, runner, prince with the swift warning. Be cunning and full of tricks and your people shall never be destroyed."

"He felt that the darkness itself was alive and hated him, and it never changed, never slept, never spoke. All it had to do was to wait for him to go mad, to break down, to give up and surrender. Then he would have lost and the implacable darkness would have won."

[seventhsamurai]

"You're afraid you'll discover things about each other that you won't like?

"Oh no. No, no. We're past that stage. She knows my likes and dislikes. I've become attuned to her various quirks...eccentricities...bugaboos...bete noires...night terrors...it's the fun of being in love."

Frasier and Niles Crane.

[Zombie pixe]

Blackadder III:

Frufru: "this sausage is very suspicious, if i didn't know better id say it was a horse's wil-

Blackadder: -Yes yes, now...

[Vernal]

A good quote for everyone.

"I may be a pretty sad person, but I don't make jokes in base 13." - Douglas Adams

Elsewise, see my sig.

[Shraik]

"WINDMILLS DO NOT WORK THAT WAY" Morbo.

Second I read that, I started to crack up

[Ninja Chocobo]

"I enjoyed your stories. So I will not eat your eyes."
-Kalliades, Troy: Lord of the Silver Bow.

Also see the first two in my sig. The rest is my collection of Humble Pie quotes.

[Krimm_Blackleaf]

"Hey! I don't tell you how to tell me what to do so don't tell me how to do what you tell me to do!"
-Bender

[Lady Tialait]

"Ofcorse you fight fire with fire, you fight everything with fire." - Jaya Ballard.

"Fair? Fair!? When in this discussion did you consive to yourself that I am trying to be Fair?" - some magic card I can't remeber witch


"HAPPY HOUR!" Cleric of Ollie casting "Mass Heal"

@V: erm..thanks...we have overquoted it...and it mutated...*insert much hugging here*

[Reinboom]

"Fair? Fair!? When in this discussion did you consive to yourself that I am trying to be Fair?" - some magic card I can't remeber witch

"Fair? At what point in our negotiations did you convince yourself my goal was to be fair?"
Card: Vedalken Plotter
Set: Guildpact, Uncommon

Magic: The Gathering has a lot of good quotes, especially among goblins.

"Fire, aim, ready!"
- Goblin War Strike
"
"Darius?"
"Yeah?"
"There is a goblin sneaking up behind you."
"So?"
"Just sayin..."
- Wave of Indifference

"Everybody but me—CHARGE!"
- Ib Halfheart, Goblin Tactician

"I order you to volunteer."
- Skirk Drill Sargent

And even some more interesting ones to think about:
"War is a conflict that determines not who is right—but who is left."
- Shock Troops

[Ceska]

A lot of Nietzsche quotes:

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Ich sage euch: man muß noch Chaos in sich haben, um einen tanzenden Stern gebären zu können. - I tell you: one must have chaos in one, to give birth to a dancing star.

Die stillsten Worte sind es, welche den Sturm bringen. Gedanken, die mit Taubenfüßen kommen, lenken die Welt. - It is the stillest words that bring on the storm. Thoughts that come on doves' feet guide the world.

Wer mit Ungeheuern kämpft, mag zusehn, dass er nicht dabei zum Ungeheuer wird. Und wenn du lange in einen Abgrund blickst, blickt der Abgrund auch in dich hinein. - He who fights with monsters should look to it that he himself does not become a monster. And when you gaze long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you.

Was aus Liebe getan wird, geschieht immer jenseits von Gut und Böse. - What is done out of love always takes place beyond good and evil.

Der Irrsinn ist bei Einzelnen etwas seltenes - aber bei Gruppen, Parteien, Völkern, Zeiten die Regel." - Madness is the exception in individuals but the rule in groups.

Bold are my absolute favourites.

Then my absolute favourite:
Freiheit ist immer die Freiheit des Andersdenkenden - Freedom is always the freedom of those who think differently.

And some song quotes:

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I'm selfdestructive baby, but a friendly one. You better leave me here alone, I need this night to heal my world send me a smile and I'll get by. (Spiritual Beggars on Send me a Smile)

But I feel fine today cos I've got friends inside my head. They tell me stories about the world within ourselves ...and watch me get high.
(Spiritual Beggars on Inside Charmers)

Tired of dull ages, I walk the same ground, collecting the tragedies still. Hollow ambitions in a hollow mind, carried my cross to the hill. (In Flames on Moonshield)

Stood there cursing at the soul-dead mass with their fabled illusions, the vain dreams that passed splinters of a life rushing by in the whirl. A lone, silent warrior in a fantasy world. (In Flames on Artifacts of the Black Rain)

Apathy dressed in violence, white insectoid legs curse her lips and the mouth receptive only to pain. (In Flames on Gyroscope)

And a lot more.