Erfworld 84: Parson's Klog Page 7

[SteveMB]

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In my opinion, It has been shown that Erfworld, the world, serves no purpose aside from war, death, destruction, pain; the very world itself is literally a game, a giant chessboard so to speak, with living, breathing, feeling pieces. Stats and levels are as real and concrete to Erfworlders as their hair and teeth. But in the end? Erfworlders are literally born of nothing: they pop into existence fully formed; and mere hours after they die, they return to it.

So what does this mean all in all? The lives of Erfworlders are seemingly worthless. How many have popped in one turn, died before their next even started, and then were obliterated once it did? Can we even consider Erfworlders "people"? We know that there is some Valhalla-like afterlife for those that have racked up enough kills, or maybe heroic deeds: the "City of Heroes". But what of the rest? Is there an afterlife for the ordinary footsoldier who fulfills his duty that seems to be killing and dying for his Overlord? Are they reincarnated as a new units somewere?

People say that life on earth is futile, that the world cares for you not; but to a native of Erfworld? Would our hell be a paradise to someone from a world where there are many who are actualy out to end your very short existence for no reason whatsoever?

We know that (at least some) Erfworlders believe in the City of Heroes, not that it's necessarily real. That might be a response to the questions you raise about the meaning of life in a world where everyone is created as a piece on the chessboard. (The real-world analogies are obvious, but well beyond the subject of this forum, so I won't go into them here.)

[rosebud]

In my opinion, It has been shown that Erfworld, the world, serves no purpose aside from war, death, destruction, pain

I differ with this sentiment. Ansom and Jillian had a very enjoyable evening.

Also, the same might be said of some Medieval worlds. They do have religion or at least the notion of a greater being. And the City of Heros afterworld that you referred to. So there's the possibility of more that has not been shown.

And, as Parson dealing with Misty's death, I too am forced to look at my own mortality.

Comfort. There's not much I can add to that sentiment.

Actually, there is one thought I can mention:

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Perhaps Parson is special enough to change things.

[Furin_Mirado]

Depending on how good of a defense that caldera is, they might not be so booped. I'm mainly concerned about the Archons and how he'll deal with them. Right now he needs something to help deal with air forces and I'm wondering if that sword hilt isn't related. Perhaps the arkensword has just been spawned as an, until now, unknown arken'tool'. Which would make 'arkentool' a misnomer, but it's not the first time humans have named something only to find out the name was not apt at all once they found out more about it. I also like the idea that it's a wii-mote or a sword capable of slashing things at a distance. That would definitely help you fight air forces from the ground. Now if only Parson wasn't level 2...

[dakiwiboid]

Parson's grown a lot. I like that he decided to have Misty buried. Stanley would have just wanted another Gobwin, I think.

Fight on, Parson!

[JordanGreywolf]

Someone said Lightsaber, that is a possibility. Of course, I'd expect some sort of parody with that.

The thought had occurred to me, too, with mention of "a hilt" without mention of an actual sword attached to it, but so far this setting isn't shy about geekish pop culture references - and I'd imagine that if it were a "lightsaber," it would pretty much look so much like one that Parson would be able to recognize it.

I'm more inclined to guess that this is the Stupid Meal's cue for Parson's loyal lackey to forge him a weapon, just as he previously forged armor, since it looks like the fight's going to come to Gobwin Knob after all.

Anyway, I'm glad to see the Klog. It efficiently conveyed quite a lot of story in very few words. As always, I look forward to the next installment.

[Yuki Akuma]

Perhaps the arkensword has just been spawned as an, until now, unknown arken'tool'. Which would make 'arkentool' a misnomer, but it's not the first time humans have named something only to find out the name was not apt at all once they found out more about it.

What? Weapons are tools. They just happen to be tools with which you kill people.

[Bongos]

THE RETURN OF THE KLOGS!

I'm so glad these are back, not only are they very useful in understanding the "game" of Erfworld, but they are a pretty original and clever narrative device, keeping in line with the pop culture references of Erfworld.

I am holding back on any theories, Erfworld creators have proven to be able to come up with surprising and unpredictable stories, but the extra info in the klogs does let me feel more involved knowing more of the story and answering many questions.

[WoodenTable]

After reading the klog page, I started thinking about King Arthur. Sort of. Who can pull a sword out of stone, when all that was originally thrust into it was a hilt? I'd bet Sizemore can.

Whether that would make him the overlord, or just the weapon-maker for Parson, I haven't a clue. Could make him the Lady of the Lake, for all I know (The Guy of the Crater? ).

[SauroGrenom]

I was just thinking that last week's comic kind of confirms that there is a maximum number of units in a stack, or a maximum number that can be cloaked by the foolmancer.

Stanley has the 27 group B dwagons. And then he also has the foolmancer, himself and 3 knights. So that's 32 guys, and he has enough flying mounts for about 54. He must be taking a smaller number because he has no other choice.

It's a bit of a leap to say that the 32 guys are the max he can fit into a single square under one stack, but not totally unreasonable.

Assuming that there's a max of 32 units in one stack or square, that gives us a bit of info on how spread out the alliance would be.

Right now, I'm thinking the sword is going to be a big deal... The fact that it's a "toy" sword makes me think of how the arkenhammer looks like a toy hammer...

Also Parson is somehow going to force them to go in through the tunnels, and he'll start eating marbits for breakfast.

I wonder what Gobwin Knob's producing right now?

[SteveMB]

I was just thinking that last week's comic kind of confirms that there is a maximum number of units in a stack, or a maximum number that can be cloaked by the foolmancer.

Stanley has the 27 group B dwagons. And then he also has the foolmancer, himself and 3 knights. So that's 32 guys, and he has enough flying mounts for about 54. He must be taking a smaller number because he has no other choice.

It could be a limit on the force he can sustain without GK's income to pay for upkeep. (Actually, we have no idea of how he can sustain himself, much less others, under those conditions, though a limited ability to do so would seem to be necessary to allow free-lance mercenaries like Jillian to exist. He evidently didn't think it would be an obstacle to his original "take the Arkenhammer and get out" plan, and it's an obvious enough issue that even someone as careless as him should have thought of it.)

[Ravenlord]

Really now, the Alliance has over 40x the force needed to kick GK's (and Parson's) backside. They had 25x when Parson still had the dwagons, which were flying units AND powerful units. Now he lost all of them, and didn't even inflict any casualty that'd seriously hamper the Alliance.

Military-wise, he's toast. Even if he somehow forces the Alliance into the tunnels - and somehow averts the disaster coming in the form of siege units and/or aerial drop of archons+gwiffons+ansom+arkenplier+otherflyignunits - he still can't win. A force of over forty times your strength can afford a war of attrition, even if their losses are disproportionate. Even if they walk from trap to trap inside the tunnels, they'll eventually overwhelm them (which would be reminiscent of how the Red Army beat the Wehrmacht in WW2: every single battle they always lost a lot, but they had so overwhelming numerical superiority that it didn't matter).

So, I'm firmly believing that the only solution that can save GK is outside military resolutions. They either have to run as well, find a way to avert the Alliance smashing them, or find a loophole in the mechanics of Erfworld to avoid/postpone the siege. Parson could even pull a feint along the lines of marching out towards the advancing army with his new sword (or hilt ), claiming he croaked/routed Stanley and took over GK.

[plainsfox]

Remember that GK had about 150k schmuckers left to them after they bought the spell to bring Parson there. Apparently GK brings enough to maintain all the remaining units there, if we trust Stanley's math.

[Meshakhad]

About Parson needing combat skills - I agree totally. But I have an alternate idea to sword skills (though a few hours spent in the armory would not be ill-spent). Remember that Parson is about as big as a twoll, and likely has similar strength, and can therefore wield weapons that are too big for ordinary people to wield. And realize that Parson would prefer to remain in the rear if possible. And realize that if Parson has any pre-existing weapons skill, it would be with ranged weapons.

My thoughts? Rather than a sword, give him a ballista. He'll use it like a crossbow. He'd be a siege weapon, only with the mobility of a twoll.

[Belphegor]

I still believe Parson is destined to weild Arkenpliers if not all Arkentools.

[Ironwulf]

There is circumstantial evidence that weapons can be resized at will (Jillian in her battle with the dragon p71) Perhaps the sword hilt represents this, a weapon that can be anything from a dagger to a greatsword.

[fractal]

It appears that the point of the comic is indeed to have a BATTLE for Gobwin Knob, and these early events, including Stanley's departure with the dwagons, are merely to make it properly challenging for Parson.

[Karellen]

In principle, I'd much rather see Parson claim a strategic victory for once than arbitrarily gain an advantage by gaining some sort of weird combat skills for no apparent reason - but that ship might have sailed already, much as I don't like it. Considering how much more screwed he is now compared to the earlier situation - and that one, he blew it anyway - it's getting pretty hard to think of him actually gaining any serious victory in a way that didn't stretch my suspension of disbelief to the breaking point.

I hope we'll still be seeing Stanley around. I still believe that man is nowhere near as stupid as he's let on, and I'd really like it if he ended up doing something really awesome at one point or another. Parson will have a hard time improving his track record, but Stanley's more of a black horse; I'd be sad if the plot didn't do something with that in the future.

[Mr. Goodwraith]

Stanley's "Double V for Victory" looks just like President Nixon's when he boarded Air Force One and headed back to California after he resigned the Presidency.

Ding ding ding! Correct! At OVFF, Rob told me that this klog was coming and that Stanley's gesture would be a reference to Nixon's departure.

[Stonedef]

It appears that the point of the comic is indeed to have a BATTLE for Gobwin Knob, and these early events, including Stanley's departure with the dwagons, are merely to make it properly challenging for Parson.

they _fight_ in this comic?? o.0

who knew...

[Jasdoif]

Am I the only one who thought of Roy's quest to reforge his sword when I saw the mention of a sword hilt? Maybe it's green

[teratorn]

Thanks for the Nixon reference guys, I thought it meant something but I know very little about American presidents.

Misty is dead, and Parson now is fearing for his life. He started at level 2 and remains there because he didn't win a single engagement (he always retreated).

The stupid meals don't really affect my suspension of disbelief since they are giving Parson the means to function in Erfworld. Parson needed a weapon, he got one. Same way he needed to see stats he got the googles, needed to do math got the wrist thingie.

Parson should try to cut himself to see what happens to him in that regard (or maybe not, if he only has a few hit points).

[StClair]

Ding ding ding! Correct! At OVFF, Rob told me that this klog was coming and that Stanley's gesture would be a reference to Nixon's departure.

Aw, I thought he was just Throwin' Up The Horns (continuing the KISS/heavy metal theme).

[BarGamer]

NOOOOOOOO! Misty! *Sob.*

Ok, enough of that.

So Sizemore can tunnel through solid rock? And since he can make golems out of them... I'm thinking of OOTS here, but who says that only the people on the outside can use catapults? Plug the tunnel holes with them too, and you've got a fortress.

Could the crap golems be what Sizemore was talking about when he mentioned slowing down the opposition in Parson's Klog 5?

Finally, as much as Parson is gonna fight against it, I'm thinking he might need to link Wanda, Sizemore, and Maggie to get some really good quality Undead Rock/Crap Golems. Or something.

The comic started before the Wii came out, so it's not impossible to think that the weird sword-hilt-thing could be some sort of weapon/ ranged remote control. I wonder what Bogroll the Smith is going to make out of it. Joystick?

[SteveMB]

Aw, I thought he was just Throwin' Up The Horns (continuing the KISS/heavy metal theme).

I thought "throwin' up the horns" was the pinky and index finger.

That said, it's close enough to work on both levels.

[molotov02]

[snap]Really now, the Alliance has over 40x the force needed to kick GK's (and Parson's) backside. They had 25x when Parson still had the dwagons, which were flying units AND powerful units. Now he lost all of them, and didn't even inflict any casualty that'd seriously hamper the Alliance.

Military-wise, he's toast. Even if he somehow forces the Alliance into the tunnels - and somehow averts the disaster coming in the form of siege units and/or aerial drop of archons+gwiffons+ansom+arkenplier+otherflyignunits - he still can't win. A force of over forty times your strength can afford a war of attrition, even if their losses are disproportionate. Even if they walk from trap to trap inside the tunnels, they'll eventually overwhelm them (which would be reminiscent of how the Red Army beat the Wehrmacht in WW2: every single battle they always lost a lot, but they had so overwhelming numerical superiority that it didn't matter).[/snap]

I completely agree with this from a strategical point of view, but would like to add just one thing. That this statement is only true if The Ansom Coalition is willing to loose such numbers. If there is a upper limit to the losses they are willing to bear, it might work for Parson to inflict enough casualties that they will retreat, the coalition breaks, the morale shatters or anything else in those lines. Ansom has been shown to be very reluctant to sacrifice his units/people(needlessly), so its unlikely he'll engage in a war of attrition if it can be avoided.

The weakness of The Ansom Coalition is that it is a coalition, and alliances can be broken, twisted and turned. Also, as huge armies also need a huge upkeep, delay tactics might work here, though i fully admit there does not seems to be the time for that.

[cmdrclueless]

Given the author's use of previous material and some of the stuff I've seen on Angry Zen Master which I believe to be Jamie's weblog; I have an "out there" idea for the sword. It doesn't predate the light saber, but it's a bit more in line with Erf....

Since the sword is just a hilt I halfway expect to see a Thundarr the Barbarian reference w/a flaming sword. We have Parson who, while overly large compared to erfworlders, could be Thundarr. Bogroll could be Ookla, which leaves the question of weather the thinkamancer or Wanda would be Ariel. Amazingly enough Wanda kind of looks like Ariel; probably only by random chance though.


For those not up on Conan spoofs, check out the wikipedia entry:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thundarr_the_Barbarian

[Ravenlord]

molotov02: I doubt they are worried about casualties. If they were, they would not start a siege in the first place - that thing is a meat grinder (at least for attackers) by nature. Ansom doesn't like throwing away troops for nothing indeed, but I feel that's a personal trait, not a coalition thing.

I also doubt the Alliance could shatter in a few turns like how you envision (that's how long the siege will be, according to plans), especially in the middle of a battle. First, parts of the Coalition, once engaged, cannot easily pull out of a battle, even if they change their mind about it. Second, IF they change their mind, anyone would be caught between two fires - Parson and Ansom - which is a strong incentive to not even try it. Breaking up the Alliance through mounting losses is possible (that's what Vietcong did, in a way), but not in the middle of a battle, IMHO.

[SteveMB]

Bogroll could be Ookla

Huh. I'd somehow never picked up on where the band got its name....

I doubt they are worried about casualties. If they were, they would not start a siege in the first place - that thing is a meat grinder (at least for attackers) by nature. Ansom doesn't like throwing away troops for nothing indeed, but I feel that's a personal trait, not a coalition thing.

It could be a cost-to-reward issue. If the Coalition learns that originally expected reward (to put an end to Stanley) is not in sight (at least, not as a result of storming Gobwin Knob), that could reduce their willingness to incur casualties or put up with the strain of keeping a large alliance together.

[Zeku]

Thanks for the great comic, as usual, with many layers of interesting details. I didn't realize that Stanley was a type of 'tool' until someone else mentioned it.

The only startling thing in this comic is the 'Special' after Parson's name. If you're not familiar with these types of games, this type of additional information after a unit description typically means that it has an ability that doesn't appear anywhere else in the gameworld.

It's not necessarily gamebreaking, it's just unusual. For example, in Master of Magic, particular heroes could have specials like 'water walking' allowing everything they are stacked with to move at a normal rate over water, 'arcane power,' vastly powering up their ranged attack, 'noble,' giving you free resources every turn, etc.

The only thing we know about Parson is that he is 'big.' Ie, he has the supposed perfect military mind, but he is also physically large in respect to Erfworld units. This seems like the obvious category that the special would fall into. 'Big' would grant that particular unit increased hit points and damage, with respect to the normal values of that particular unit type. In the case of a warlord, it could be a significant multiplier, allowing him to plow through basic units unharmed.

[Ozar]

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At the last possible moment, Parson attunes with the Arkendriver and summons an army of Gundams. The alliance gets the hell out of dodge.