Dominic Deegan, Mk. XLVIII: Mighty Whitey Magic Blighty

[SaintRidley]

Bort is... an Eld? Is that why he's talking about "our Empire?" Or is the Wild Edge the ruins of a previous empire that tried to get the Heart?

Both of these combined is the only sense I can make of this update. Bort and the other mongrelpeople being the only remaining Eld on their native plane, the Wild Edge being the ruins of their empire.

For the April Fool's Sneaky:

Utterly stupid of Mookie to have him revert for panel 7. No purpose there, and it doesn't even function as a joke. Not even fricking alliteration, which constitutes humor in Mookie's mind. Pure garbage there.

For the real Sneaky:

Somehow, it's even dumber. Unsurprising Mookie would avoid the effort of drawing something different for April Fool's. A text swap is all that's necessary. That he played with the sneaky suggests that he might be among us, though, as long suspected.

[random11]

Fo realz this time.

Yeah, this is worse.

It's simple to explain:

Someone had to explain what's going on + only Bort was available -> Bort can talk.

[Johnny Blade]

My favourite part about it is it feels more in character than the actual update.

It seriously does and I'm not entirely sure why. Maybe because it retains something of Bort's awkwardness and reverts to the wacky catchphrase where the real comic is just awkward in a whole new way.


Anyway, it's live. It's real! I love this comic.

And there's a newspost!

I try to avoid big exposition dumps if I can.

I can't breathe.


EDIT:

Spoiler

Show

[SaintRidley]

I try to avoid big exposition dumps if I can.

At first I was puzzled. "Mookie's never met an exposition dump he didn't like," I thought to myself.

Then it dawned on me. Every time Mookie has a silent panel, he's fighting the urge to put a ton of boring (and contradictory and stupid) exposition in it. Being 90% exposition, rather than 100% exposition, satisfactorily avoids big exposition dumps, in Mookieland.

Plus, I think it's amusing that the poor mongrelman doesn't seem to have control as to when he can talk.

Let's not let him off so easy on the making fun of a mental (or is it physical in Bort's case? Both?) handicap here, either.

[Ninjadeadbeard]

Fo realz this time.

Yeah, this is worse.

Is it wrong of me to think the prank update was better? Because it was.

And dear sweet soggoth Mookie's been here the whole time. Or maybe he was always one of us...?

[Welf]

Sneaky gate.
Future link.

Well that was atrocious.

Oh you. That really confused me for quite a while.

[Morty]

I can't breathe.

Welp, Mookie finally did it. He killed a snarker.

[Neoriceisgood]

Can anyone remind me what happened at the wedding? I'm still bugged I forgot.

[Trazoi]

Can anyone remind me what happened at the wedding? I'm still bugged I forgot.

From what I remember about "I Do":

• Dominic and Luna are in Church Land, and start having weddingy thoughts like they have for the past couple of years instead of bothing about saving the world
• Miranda hears them having weddingy thoughts from another dimension because she is always watching always listening to everyone. She pops in and gets angry about them planning to elope and not involving her because she really wants to be at the wedding, then apologises for daring to even impose that small favour upon Dominic.
• Dom and Luna promise Miranda they totally aren't planning on getting surprise married in the next day, so she has nothing to worry about. Miranda pops off back to her own hidey hole dimension.
• Dominic then goes onto a flashback backstory about how Miranda's bossy parents ruined their wedding by wanting it to be traditional instead of elvish metal, rock on.
• Dom then scries on what their wedding would like and sees the Beast killing everyone, because Dom and Luna were obviously too self-absorbed to save the world before the wedding. Duh.
• Dom and Luna then go into soppy speeches about how much they love each other. I can't remember how they got here from seeing everyone brutally murdered, but I can see the connection.
• Then Greg pops in from nowhere and says that sounds like wedding vows, then Jayden breaks her vow of silence to declare them married, but not before Greg ruins everything by interrupting the pivotal moment by throwing the horns and giving a metal cry.
• Dom and Luna then summon a glowy thing to tell everyone they just got married. Miranda for some reason is happy despite her lying son just doing exactly what he said he wouldn't and breaking her heart by not inviting her to her own son's wedding.
• The year ends with the villains reminding Mookie they still exist.

[Neoriceisgood]

Oh that does ring a bell, huh.

Thanks.

[T-O-E]

Mookie: I try to avoid big exposition dumps if I can.

Remember what day it is, Johnny.

Dominic Deegan, Mk. XLIX: I try to avoid big dumps if I can

[Traab]

I feel like I've been sniffing whatever magical wonder glue is keeping Bort on the underside of a perfectly smooth surface while holding another person of equal weight by the wrist.

Unless Bort turns out to be possessed by Klo Tark. Then it'll all make sense. *twitch*

Also: I thought Celesto's stupid emo crystal wings fell apart in the Wild Edge. Silly me, I actually got the impression it was some sort of significant character moment; that they fell apart and he just let them go. Why does he have them again?

No, that was celesto trying to control his chaos magic without going all fangs and black ooze bloody. At the time he failed. So of course, now that he has had a week to practice, he is able to not only use his chaos wing attack, but use it in a combat situation.

[Cavelcade]

I assume it was TOE's april fool's. It worked.

The real comic is even better-worse, somehow. I mean wow Mookie, and an amazing newspost? I love this.

[Neoriceisgood]

I wish there was a way to make amazing newsposts like Mookies without not making your webcomic horribly bad first..

[T-O-E]

My favourite part about it is it feels more in character than the actual update.

Webcomics suck.

I have no life.

And in other news, Least I Could Do has started an arc where Rayne visits North Korea. It is predictably mature.

[SaintRidley]

And in other news, Least I Could Do has started an arc where Rayne visits North Korea. It is predictably mature.

Dear gods, every ounce of that is terrible.

[Wraith]

"Using [...] the time he spent here with you, he brought us to the Elemecca."

Someone explain this to me, please.

May 2nd 2005 to May 11th 2005.

During which Domonic talks to Leafette and Acibek for 5 minutes, is beam-spammed in the back by Raf Malakish, and then Celesto leaves after 10 seconds of self-justification and thoroughly Snarker-approved vengeance.

You know, all THAT time they spent together in the Elemecca?

[T-O-E]

May 2nd 2005 to May 11th 2005.

During which Domonic talks to Leafette and Acibek for 5 minutes, is beam-spammed in the back by Raf Malakish, and then Celesto leaves after 10 seconds of self-justification and thoroughly Snarker-approved vengeance.

You know, all THAT time they spent together in the Elemecca?

Maybe he used a connection.

[Wraith]

So the way into the Elemecca is through 'connecting' to each other via sex with Rapechel Hart?

That's.... That sounds obscene and disturbing in a number of ways.

[Doxkid]

Now I'm imagining a world where every strange, unlikely and obscure ritual is done by having sex with that one particular woman.

"Hey baby. Want to help me prove Acerbik's Principle can be applied spells in non-beam form? Wait, come back! Please! I need this A!"

[Traab]

Now I'm imagining a world where every strange, unlikely and obscure ritual is done by having sex with that one particular woman.

"Hey baby. Want to help me prove Acerbik's Principle can be applied spells in non-beam form? Wait, come back! Please! I need this A!"

"Oh calm down! I am just going to get the cat ears for you to wear!"

[slayerx]

kinda like how snuggly became less threatening the moment it begun to speak, Bort has become much less amusing now that he talks. Mookie has a way of ruining tiny shred of good that remains in this comic... I guess that's fitting for the end...

[T-O-E]

kinda like how snuggly became less threatening the moment it begun to speak, Bort has become much less amusing now that he talks. Mookie has a way of ruining tiny shred of good that remains in this comic... I guess that's fitting for the end...

Text makes everything worse. It even applies to the newspost.

vegan metal rock on

[Mogotoo]

The sneaky link.
The future link.
Oh no! We're going to lose the Treasure that we didn't really have and it was actually in the hands of the Enemy and we don't really need it for anything specific anyway!

Curses!

[Ninjadeadbeard]

The sneaky link.
The future link.
Oh no! We're going to lose the Treasure that we didn't really have and it was actually in the hands of the Enemy and we don't really need it for anything specific anyway!

Curses!

The Beast must be stopped. No matter the cost.

[Johnny Blade]

Text makes everything worse. It even applies to the newspost.

See also: this comic just now.

It's glorious. The speech bubble placement even makes it look like Celesto's pausing for dramatic effect between sentences.

And there is nothing to say about the wonders of "The Lost Treasure! We're going to lose it!"
Just perfect.

May 2nd 2005 to May 11th 2005.

During which Domonic talks to Leafette and Acibek for 5 minutes, is beam-spammed in the back by Raf Malakish, and then Celesto leaves after 10 seconds of self-justification and thoroughly Snarker-approved vengeance.

You know, all THAT time they spent together in the Elemecca?

Oh, I remember. But how does that help Celesto teleport to Dominic? Is there some kind of special stalker magic in this setting?
I mean, I'm used to Mookie just making stuff up hoping it will somehow end up making a bit of sense, maybe (which it never really does), but this is stupid even by his standards. How do you use time spent with a person for a spell? Why would it even matter? He's explicitly linked to the Beast.
This is Mookie beyond Mookie.

[Kwatsu]

It's simple to explain:

Someone had to explain what's going on + only Bort was available -> Bort can talk.

And yet I still don't know what the hell's going on. Aside from the character assassination of someone who barely had characterisation before now.

And there is nothing to say about the wonders of "The Lost Treasure! We're going to lose it!"
Just perfect.

What.

I. No. Who.

DOMINIC, YOU WERE BEING TOLD TO EXPLODE THE TREASURE NOT FIVE MINUTES AGO, YOU MONUMENTAL DUNCE. THE LOST TREASURE GETTING LOST CAN ONLY HELP YOU AT THIS POINT.

*thud*

[Mr. McGician]

What.

I. No. Who.

DOMINIC, YOU WERE BEING TOLD TO EXPLODE THE TREASURE NOT FIVE MINUTES AGO, YOU MONUMENTAL DUNCE. THE LOST TREASURE GETTING LOST CAN ONLY HELP YOU AT THIS POINT.

*thud*

Maybe this is showing that Dominic is still power-hungry? But that would require Mookie being subtle, so maybe not.

[Johnny Blade]

You know, I thought the Lost Treasure just didn't really matter anymore, since the Beast was pretty clear about Dominic being too late.

Obviously, Mookie thinks otherwise.

[SaintRidley]

DOMINIC, YOU WERE BEING TOLD TO EXPLODE THE TREASURE NOT FIVE MINUTES AGO, YOU MONUMENTAL DUNCE. THE LOST TREASURE GETTING LOST CAN ONLY HELP YOU AT THIS POINT.

*thud*

Not if he uses it as a focus for Acibek's Principle. It'll empower the Principle because... reasons.

Post 1500. New thread time. Suggesting Mk. XLIX: The End is Why. Someone else can make the thread.