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Thread: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
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2009-08-30, 02:47 PM (ISO 8601)
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- Aug 2009
Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
Hi!
Although I just joined the forums I've been reading here for a while, especially this nice little thread here. Took some time catch up, but it was worth it. There really are some great story writers here, I'm looking forward to the continuations of your stories!
...Guess I could express my thanks best with an own attempt at contributing, but I've got no experience with crack-fics and... I'm kinda scared of rolling the dice on these tables.
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2009-08-30, 03:05 PM (ISO 8601)
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- May 2009
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Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
You don't need to roll a die. Are there two characters you wish were together but aren't? There, here's your crack pairing.
Formerly known as Discord here and Maladin on avatarspirit.net.
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2009-08-30, 03:17 PM (ISO 8601)
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- Jul 2008
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- Germany
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2009-08-30, 03:34 PM (ISO 8601)
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- Mar 2009
Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
Last edited by The Dark Fiddler; 2009-08-30 at 03:35 PM.
It's been a bit, GitP. If you're reading this, you're either digging through old stuff, or I've posted for the first time in forever.
If you want to stay in touch, reach out to me on twitter (same username).
The best answer is always to ask your DM.
Unless you're the DM, in which case you should talk to your players.
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2009-08-30, 04:30 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Aug 2009
- Location
- NorCal
- Gender
Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
I nominate a modron + Qarr.
Or of course a slaad plus a modron.
Or a cherubim (green baby planetar) + Qarr.
My apologies if these have be mentioned before in this quite voluminous thread...Avatar courtesy of the excellent Neoclassic!
(& R.I.P., Planescape...)
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2009-08-30, 05:32 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Nov 2008
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2009-08-30, 06:29 PM (ISO 8601)
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- Aug 2009
Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
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2009-08-30, 06:58 PM (ISO 8601)
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- Jun 2009
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- TX, USA
- Gender
Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
Oh, man; I get grounded for two weeks, and it goes from 4 pages to 30 pages! I'm greatly anticipating catching up.
"It must be humbling to suck on so many levels." -Sheldon Cooper, Big Bang Theory
When life gives you lemons, tell Belkar it called him short and then laugh from a safe distance.
Starving the trolls since 2004
Proud inventor of the I-pod Throwing Star... I think.
Feel free to click the clickies! (By that I mean DO IT NOW!)
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2009-08-30, 07:35 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Mar 2009
Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
It's been a bit, GitP. If you're reading this, you're either digging through old stuff, or I've posted for the first time in forever.
If you want to stay in touch, reach out to me on twitter (same username).
The best answer is always to ask your DM.
Unless you're the DM, in which case you should talk to your players.
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2009-08-30, 07:58 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- May 2007
Credits to half-halfling for my adorable avatar.
...............................................
Come visit the Discussion Thread Index II.
Looking for a new webcomic to read? Take a look at the Webcomic List.
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2009-08-30, 08:54 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Nov 2006
- Location
- England
Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
*jumps on the VxRC fanart bandwagon*
Oh, and thanks Delorges for reminding me to add an eye-patch!Last edited by Zanaril; 2009-08-31 at 02:17 AM.
This post may contain sarcasm.
DeviantArt
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2009-08-30, 09:57 PM (ISO 8601)
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- Aug 2009
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- NorCal
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2009-08-31, 04:00 AM (ISO 8601)
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- Nov 2006
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- England
Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
This post may contain sarcasm.
DeviantArt
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2009-08-31, 05:08 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Nov 2008
Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
Lien x Durkon.
I need to get this pairing more widely regarded.
Sweet and short, just like Lien and Durkon
SpoilerThe snow-white sheets were tangled around Lien's log legs, crumpled in a heap from the urgency of their movements that had only come to a stop moments ago. Her chest was still heaving as she panted, staring at the ceiling, a blissful, contented feeling bubbling in her stomach and spreading throughout her body. She felt complete.
He was wrapped around her, his brawny arms resting gently against the sharply defined muscles of her back, his beard tickling her shoulder. Like her, he was on his back, staring at the ceiling.
"What are you thinking about?" She asked softly as the afterglow faded, turning to stare at him, her sea green eyes thoughtful.
"Kuboto." He said quickly, without thinking.
A shocked look crossed her features briefly before being replaced with a wicked smile, and a teasing quality entered her voice. "Of all the things you could have said..." she mocked, making Durkon’s cheeks redden above his whiskers.
"Ye ken Ae dinnae mean it tha’ way,” He said anxiously. “It's joost..."
"I know." She said, idly stroking a pattern on his cheek, just above his beard. To her considerable surprise, the beard had grown on her, and she liked. Besides, it gave him a distinguished, wise look. And it was so blessedly soft, she felt she could spend all day just running her hands through it.
"I dinnae like 'im. He's ae bad 'un. Ae snake if there ever was one. E'll betray us at some point." He continued, trying to keep up his tangent, while at the same time responding to Lien. It was always hard, she was such a good distraction.
"I wouldn't worry about him." She said, with a little noise almost like a laugh, before sucking on his earlobe. His rough hands ran over her face to tangle themselves in her hair.
"Why nay?" He said, his voice already husky. Thor, she was insatiable.
"He's a little man. Oh, he blusters and schemes, but in the end, he doesn't amount to anything."
"E's little? An' what am Ae?" He asked, raising a bushy brow.
She smiled again, in a way that seemed to light up the room. "Oh, your a giant where it counts."
He cocked his head questioningly, glancing down beneath the sheets, but she continued before he could say what he was thinking.
"Here." She said, placing a calloused hand on his hairy, well developed chest. "You have a good heart. The biggest, most generous one of anyone I've ever met. You always put yourself last, and do what is right. You never back down, or give up. You're never weak." She said, her tone completely serious. "Your wise, and kind, and a good man.
To his surprise, he felt a strong emotion welling in his chest, for this amazing, beautiful, no, this perfect women he had been lucky enough to meet. Gathering her in his arms and drawing her close, he kissed her, long and tenderly, and as gentle as he could. When he finally drew away, he kept their foreheads pressed.
"Ye ken Ae love ye?"
She nestled closer. "Yes. I know."
Also, I have a Slaad and a Modron to write. This will be hard, as a Slaad is a being of pure chaos, and would be all but impossible to characterize, while Modrons, by there very definition, have no identity, and are incapable of independent thought. Next to this, the fact that both are more genderless then V is totally irrelevant. But i will do it.
I remember something about Slaad's laying eggs in those they kill. Is that how they reproduce?
Good idea. OK, then. V would be the best contender, perhaps Haley.Last edited by Cracklord; 2009-08-31 at 05:10 AM.
Nadir We,
Youth Born,
Blood Letters,
Axe Weilders,
Victors Still.
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2009-08-31, 05:28 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Aug 2008
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- Scotland
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Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
Avatar by me...yup that's how good my drawing is. As in not very good.
Crack-Pairings, Not Dead Just Moved. Someone Hasn't Been Looking In The Right Places.
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2009-08-31, 08:01 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Aug 2008
- Location
- Germany.
- Gender
Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
Am I the only one who thinks someone should make a V x Redcloak banner.
I would add it to my sig.
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2009-08-31, 08:15 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Nov 2006
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- England
Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
This post may contain sarcasm.
DeviantArt
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2009-08-31, 09:24 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Aug 2009
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- Lurkers Anonymous
Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
So like I was re-reading Zanaril's fic, and I was thinking about how the story would progress after Kyrie came in. Because I like seeing elves get hurt (and also because goblins are too squicky for me to draw), I started thinking about Kyrie discovering The Relationship in an unpleasant way. Which lead to Kyrie crying. So I drew Kyrie crying and forgot about it.
Then today I came back and saw more art (Zanaril, love the lines on that V/RC picture - done with PSP?) and I had my camera on hand, so here's a picture.
SpoilerPencil and markers = not a good combination and I only realized the mistake with the eyes after coloring, so I apologize for not being able to fix it.
I think someone should confiscate my camera.
PS: Am I allowed to post these things here? I know it's only tangentially related to the thread...Last edited by Saeyan; 2009-08-31 at 09:26 AM.
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2009-08-31, 09:35 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Nov 2006
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- England
Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
Here you go, Xelliea!
Thanks! And yes, it's PSP, with vectors.
SpoilerPencil and markers = not a good combination and I only realized the mistake with the eyes after coloring, so I apologize for not being able to fix it.
PS: Am I allowed to post these things here? I know it's only tangentially related to the thread...Last edited by Zanaril; 2009-08-31 at 09:35 AM.
This post may contain sarcasm.
DeviantArt
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2009-08-31, 09:42 AM (ISO 8601)
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- Aug 2009
Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
Yeah, I think I'll stick with visual works. It's easier for me than writing.
Made a pic of our two famous paladins for practice.
Zanaril, that banner picture is awesome! Sweet.
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2009-08-31, 09:45 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- May 2009
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Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
Miko is V's and V's only! Grr!
I mean, good picture.
Zanaril, is Redcloak's lack of holy symbol intentional? Otherwise I like it.Formerly known as Discord here and Maladin on avatarspirit.net.
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2009-08-31, 09:49 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Nov 2006
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- England
Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
Last edited by Zanaril; 2009-08-31 at 09:49 AM.
This post may contain sarcasm.
DeviantArt
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2009-08-31, 09:51 AM (ISO 8601)
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- May 2009
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Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
Xykon broke Redcloak's emergency holy symbol? Hm, I must have skipped that. I'm more interested in an elf being abused than in a goblin receiving the same treatment after all...
About the crying Kyrie picture, I like it, but it's not very androgynous... unless male elves like wearing lipstick.Formerly known as Discord here and Maladin on avatarspirit.net.
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2009-08-31, 09:55 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Nov 2006
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- England
Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
This post may contain sarcasm.
DeviantArt
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2009-08-31, 10:53 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Aug 2008
- Location
- Germany.
- Gender
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2009-08-31, 10:54 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- May 2009
- Gender
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2009-08-31, 11:04 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Aug 2007
- Location
- The Serpent's Throne
- Gender
Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
This just feels wrong for me. Alas, I write FanFiction, so cast the first stone at me...
Roy/Nale; aliens made them do it
Nale/Horace Greenhilt; snowed in
Soon Kim/Bozzok; stuck on a desert island
Hilga/Shadowdancer/Teevo; something not PG enough to mention on this board
The Chimera/Durkon; French maid/police costume
Sarah Greenhilt/Daigo; snowed in
Horace Greenhilt/Tsukiko; snowed in
Therkla/Julio Scoundrel; aliens made them do itSpoilerMy Characters
According to this test, I am a LN Half-Orc Cleric, Lvl.2.
"And in the layer of the Deep Ones, we shall dwell amidst wonder and glory forever." - H.P. Lovecraft
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2009-08-31, 11:23 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Mar 2008
Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
Belkar with Belkar is easy..
Belkar, while staring into a pool of water.. sees his reflection, and develops narcissism. As such, to lure him away from all reflective surfaces.. he is pointed to Durkon's armor (shiny!) or Elan (illusions!) .. and follows his own face.Fii Starling:
5 inch Pixie, Rogue, Chosen of the God of Luck- Greater Invisibility at will. She's given "stealth" a new meaning. Her feats gave her a winged, chaotic, panda familar. Her run ins with a deck of many things have left her with a merged rapier and orb of storms. Her sneak attacks pack a punch.
Did I mention... first. EVER. DnD character.
Thank you great DM...
... and Fii loots the room.
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2009-08-31, 11:48 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Jun 2009
- Location
- Minnesota, ya?
- Gender
Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
I thought the little girl would be a love interest (if such a thing could be called that) for Belkar. Needless to say, I feel dirty inside.
...And that is how I met your father.
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2009-08-31, 12:25 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Aug 2009
- Location
- NorCal
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Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table
Modron / Slaad
The Lady of Pain had taken time out from her busy schedule of floating around Sigil's endlessly looped streets to chill in her crib. Now, she was lounging on a divan in her "Let me slip into something more comfortable" attire: - a very feminine peignoir composed entirely of cleavers and boning knives. In one slender, steel-colored hand she gently swirled the contents of a crystal snifter: a potent cocktail of magnesium and distilled sibling rivalry, 80% proof. After all, tonight was quite a special occasion.
She watched as tonight's 'guests' goggled horrified at each other, from the farthest reaches of her canopied bed. A modron and a slaad. Here on the Outer Planes, where beliefs shaped reality, it was the ultimate crack pairing...
TO BE CONTINUEDAvatar courtesy of the excellent Neoclassic!
(& R.I.P., Planescape...)