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Thread: LGBTitp - Part Six
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2010-05-12, 11:39 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Jan 2008
Re: LGBTitp - Part Six
Is there any reason he would be gay, other than his brother being gay?
I mean, feminine traits are not really a sign of being gay, though there is a weird preconception that if you're male and you have feminine traits, you must be gay (no, I'm not, for gods' sake, and while I'm flattered that you find me attractive, please stop hitting on me).
If he is, in fact, straight, bringing the topic up would cause a lot of uncomfortable moments. If he is not straight but is not willing to share it with other people, bringing the topic up would still cause a lot of uncomfortable moments. So, my advice is, let sleeping dogs lie. If he is in fact queer and chooses to confide in you, be supportive (though I doubt you would not be supportive, given your post), but don't push the issue further.
((By the way, this might feel like prying, but is the country, by any chance, Greece?))I use black for sarcasm.
Call me Rose, or The Rose Dragon. Rose Dragon is someone else entirely.
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2010-05-13, 12:06 AM (ISO 8601)
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- May 2009
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- In the campfire light
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Re: LGBTitp - Part Six
SpoilerAsked, answered, removed.
Thanks. :)Last edited by nefele; 2010-05-20 at 05:47 AM.
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2010-05-13, 12:10 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Jan 2008
Re: LGBTitp - Part Six
Actually, I checked your blog. My first thought was that you were from Turkey, which is oddly similar to Greece in that aspect, but I wasn't sure, so I checked your profile.
Frankly, if you didn't want me to figure that out, you shouldn't have written the location under every single photograph in your blog.
((I'm like a creepy e-stalker!))I use black for sarcasm.
Call me Rose, or The Rose Dragon. Rose Dragon is someone else entirely.
If you need me for something, please PM me about it. I am having difficulty keeping track of all my obligations.
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2010-05-13, 12:10 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Jun 2006
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- Dinosaur Museum aw yisss.
- Gender
Re: LGBTitp - Part Six
Well... what if, next time something comes up in the news (e.g., somewhere legalises gay marriage, some atrocity is dealt to homosexuals, etc), you make a point of commenting on it in his presence, and/or asking his opinion of it?
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2010-05-13, 12:23 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- May 2009
- Location
- In the campfire light
- Gender
Re: LGBTitp - Part Six
SpoilerAsked, answered, removed.
Thanks. :)Last edited by nefele; 2010-05-20 at 05:48 AM.
The ghost of freedom ever comes
with a knife between her teeth
Gestalt Warrior Arena Tournament (Tactics Galore) is now recruiting.
Kerynia is a homebrew 3.5 Campaign Setting, currently on hold. But who knows...
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2010-05-13, 12:43 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Oct 2008
- Location
- Bottom of a well
Re: LGBTitp - Part Six
2 words: His. Decision.
He's probably straight. Because he could (as his brother is evidently doing) be openly gay when it wouldn't get back to his parents. And if not, it's his choice whether or not to come out. I can't believe I'm doing this*, but I'm going to reference El Goonish Shive. Panel 3. Rule 1 of Sexual Orientation: It is not your job to second guess anyone else's identity. You may, however, if you are a sufficiently good friend, mockingly suggest that they're deluding themselves in their identification. With the understanding it is solely for humor purposes.
Also, I've got sort of similar attitudes towards other people as he does. So riddle me this. If the fellow would be happier making someone else happier by repressing, in what way is it kindness to make him unrepress given that by your own admission it would make him less happy?
*Actually I can, because this comic is basically my life, only it doesn't make me cry in the corner and has less physics involved in all of the weirdness that would make a tabloid embarassed to publish most of the stories I could share.
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2010-05-13, 01:01 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Oct 2008
- Location
- Xin-Shalast
- Gender
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2010-05-13, 01:02 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Jan 2008
Re: LGBTitp - Part Six
I use black for sarcasm.
Call me Rose, or The Rose Dragon. Rose Dragon is someone else entirely.
If you need me for something, please PM me about it. I am having difficulty keeping track of all my obligations.
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2010-05-13, 01:10 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Oct 2008
- Location
- Bottom of a well
Re: LGBTitp - Part Six
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2010-05-13, 01:12 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Jan 2008
Re: LGBTitp - Part Six
I use black for sarcasm.
Call me Rose, or The Rose Dragon. Rose Dragon is someone else entirely.
If you need me for something, please PM me about it. I am having difficulty keeping track of all my obligations.
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2010-05-13, 06:40 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Feb 2010
- Location
- Usaki City, Syona
- Gender
Re: LGBTitp - Part Six
No-one's married me recently... (Sad face)
Yeah, I'd agree with Golentan's advice... good luck.Recent Homebrew: The Socialite | The Crystalline: Memory Altering Construct Race | Sanguine Hand, a ToB Discipline of blood and cruelty
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2010-05-13, 08:11 AM (ISO 8601)
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- Feb 2006
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- for the sake of my art?
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2010-05-13, 08:29 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Jun 2006
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- Dinosaur Museum aw yisss.
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Re: LGBTitp - Part Six
A friend of my dad's is gay and was married with... I think 2 kids. 'course, he only figured that out in the pre-divorce counselling.
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2010-05-13, 01:25 PM (ISO 8601)
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- Nov 2005
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- nubivagant
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2010-05-13, 01:31 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Feb 2010
- Location
- Usaki City, Syona
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Re: LGBTitp - Part Six
Done. <3
^_^Recent Homebrew: The Socialite | The Crystalline: Memory Altering Construct Race | Sanguine Hand, a ToB Discipline of blood and cruelty
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Thanks to all my avatar artists, especially to Paisley for my avatar of Vivian, cowardly cryophoenix.
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2010-05-13, 01:50 PM (ISO 8601)
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- Jan 2007
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- Wales!
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Re: LGBTitp - Part Six
Well I told my lesbian friend and her girlfriend. I decided to try the whole 'no fuss' thing and just made it seem as if I thought they already knew. Yay!
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2010-05-13, 03:14 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Nov 2005
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- nubivagant
Re: LGBTitp - Part Six
Congradulations, Dihan!
Lix: =3 <333
Maybe we should have a date or two first. =)P Got an MSN account? Internet dates are silly but can be fun. ^_^Still not really here. Still just an illusion.
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2010-05-13, 04:36 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Oct 2008
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- Xin-Shalast
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Re: LGBTitp - Part Six
Well, yeah, you either have to stick to your guns about it being about love or admit that it's not about love at all in what it is. That and where on earth is it not already a hellhole for other reasons that would require marriage in order to cohabit?
Never quite been sure if it's supposed to be viewed as solely tragic or with some element of the pathetic in there as well.
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2010-05-13, 04:46 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Feb 2010
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- Usaki City, Syona
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Re: LGBTitp - Part Six
'Fraid not... I have AIM and Skype, but my computer doesn't like MSN.
Well, yeah, you either have to stick to your guns about it being about love or admit that it's not about love at all in what it is. That and where on earth is it not already a hellhole for other reasons that would require marriage in order to cohabit?Last edited by Lix Lorn; 2010-05-13 at 05:00 PM.
Recent Homebrew: The Socialite | The Crystalline: Memory Altering Construct Race | Sanguine Hand, a ToB Discipline of blood and cruelty
Homebrew Signature | NEW Homebrew Collection
Thanks to all my avatar artists, especially to Paisley for my avatar of Vivian, cowardly cryophoenix.
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2010-05-13, 05:38 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Apr 2009
- Location
- late febuary
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Re: LGBTitp - Part Six
love and contractual obligations
nope; still dont see it. they seem more like opposites; and not the black/white type of opposite where their kinda similar; the pedicure/kiwi kind of opposite where theres absolutely no connection. i think our culture is just crazy
you would not believe how much i had to edit this to make it innuendo resistant.Last edited by 742; 2010-05-13 at 05:39 PM.
current excuse for incoherence: heat
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2010-05-13, 06:37 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Oct 2008
- Location
- Bottom of a well
Re: LGBTitp - Part Six
I disagree that sexuality and love are linked. Take, for example, this common archetype. If some folks were another sexual orientation, you know exactly who they'd marry. Why the hell should it be different if you don't want to do the nasty with someone you love, but do want to spend your life in close companionship with them, than any other form of marriage? What is inherently wrong with that idea?
If you're using someone else as a front, that is naturally different. But people automatically assume that lack of physical attraction + long term commitment = coverup of some sort, and it IS NOT SO, DAMMIT!!! I get that you're wired to pair bond with a mate to provide resources for children, but that hasn't been more than the tip of the romance iceberg for so long it's hardly worth mentioning.
And even if the other person wants sex, it isn't particularly onerous to ensure that they get that out of the relationship to. Or at least it wouldn't be, if people weren't such whiny babies about genitals. I've known people who spend all day cleaning portapotties, who despite their willingness to scrub raw sewage get all wibbly about genital contact. Talking about how gross X is even after they just spent an afternoon touching their own recreationally. It's skin and a small measure of fluid, people. Regardless of which version you're talking about. It is far less gross than a human mouth if properly cleaned, and you need to get over your collective neurosis about it or so help me I will neuter your entire species just so I don't have to listen to you whine about the damn things anymore.
I feel better having gotten that out of my system.
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2010-05-13, 10:11 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Jun 2006
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- Dinosaur Museum aw yisss.
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Re: LGBTitp - Part Six
Neither, I think. They were married... I'm not sure how long, but at least ten years, certainly long enough to have two sons. My dad would know, if anyone's interested enough I'll ask her. Like I said, neither of them knew he was gay, until the relationship was already going downhill. Though it wasn't very surprising (sorry guys, but... effeminate mannerisms, worked in theatre... Okay, my dad did/does that too, but... well, my Boy would've thought he was gay without knowing that, too. Hrm.).
Hm... All his ex-wife's IMDB biography says is that she's 6'2". Damn that's a huge family.The Iron Avatarist Hall of Fame!
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2010-05-13, 10:56 PM (ISO 8601)
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- Oct 2008
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- Xin-Shalast
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Re: LGBTitp - Part Six
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2010-05-14, 02:29 AM (ISO 8601)
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- Jun 2006
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- Dinosaur Museum aw yisss.
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Re: LGBTitp - Part Six
*coughiknowsemifamouspeoplecough*
And yeah, it's unfortunate (although they had a gorgeous (huge!) son), but... to the best of my knowledge, he wasn't so much repressed as it didn't occur to him.The Iron Avatarist Hall of Fame!
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2010-05-14, 03:20 AM (ISO 8601)
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- Mar 2009
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- Gothenburg, Sweden
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Re: LGBTitp - Part Six
Avatar by CoffeeIncluded
Oooh, and that's a bad miss.
“Don't exercise your freedom of speech until you have exercised your freedom of thought.”
― Tim Fargo
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2010-05-14, 03:59 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Oct 2008
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- Xin-Shalast
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Re: LGBTitp - Part Six
I thought we had already dismissed anything beyond a bisexual switching from preferring one to preferring the other as thoughtcrime and error.
You seem to be on some kind of huge kick here...
And that definitely sounds like repression of the unconscious variety.
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2010-05-14, 06:20 PM (ISO 8601)
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- Mar 2008
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2010-05-14, 08:12 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Aug 2006
- Gender
Re: LGBTitp - Part Six
I'd lean that way too, but I'm completely convinced. It didn't occur to me that I was bi until college (though granted, there's potentially a big difference between bi and gay). Before that I was more-than-just-aesthetically, not-as-far-as-sexually attracted to a very small number of guys. But emotional attraction and actual sexual attraction to the other person was never there, thus it "didn't count." It didn't fit what I defined (and how I still define) 'attraction to a person in such a way as to define their sexual orientation,' and thus I viewed myself as straight.
If someone never really stops to think about it, if they've never really had to confront a physical attraction towards someone of the same sex, but they DO have a strong and intimate emotional connection with someone of the opposite sex, I could see someone simply accepting that intimate emotional connection as straight-ness. In such a case it might be less repression, and more simply ignorance: "I am straight because I attracted to this person of the opposite sex," but the person is using 'attraction' in a different manner than others.Last edited by lsfreak; 2010-05-14 at 08:13 PM.
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2010-05-15, 06:53 AM (ISO 8601)
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- Oct 2008
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- Xin-Shalast
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Re: LGBTitp - Part Six
It still sounds like either an extreme lack of introspection or some other deficiency of self-talk and/or of dealing with one's self to be ignorant of one's self that one wouldn't pick that up something of that magnitude until midway through one's 4th or 5th or 6th decade.
Even the stereotypically vapid pay more attention to themselves than that. Granted, they're usually vapid because they're overly-self-centered and vacuous, but even they're capable of realizing they're gay at least without needing to be in their 40s or 50s.
...Some kind of overly self-sacrificing person who ignores one's own self in favor of focusing exclusively on others?
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2010-05-15, 07:36 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Jun 2006
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- Dinosaur Museum aw yisss.
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Re: LGBTitp - Part Six
Dude, you're talking about someone I know and like. I don't know the public details, much less the very private ones, but I have no reason to think he would have been somehow forced to repress it, nor that he was "extremely stupid or at least completely ignorant of (himself)", nor that his marriage was even unhappy or unfulfilling until other problems arose enough to make him think that this might have been one of them.
Please stop dissing friends of my family.Last edited by Serpentine; 2010-05-15 at 07:36 AM.
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