Things I May No Longer Do While Playing IV: The Decanter of Endless Bad Ideas

[Adanedhel]

If playing a combat heavy game, saying I'll make a character like that movie with Hugh Jackman is absolutely cool.

However, the expectation will be that I'm playing Wolverine, not Jean Valjean.

Making him a Bard does not make things better.

[Slipperychicken]

* I may not summon a number of demonic beings and submit them to my control in place of having an actual party

**Although they are admittedly great at carousing and reveling, it is a terrible idea to throw a house party involving dozens of bound Demons.

***Especially if it's in the BBEG's house.

****No, the BBEG will not "loosen up" in response to your offer to let him have a trio of Succubi for the night.

[Zahhak]

* "Pun and Pun: Rules Lawyers" is not a viable character concept, no matter how awesome and/or hilarious

I did actually propose to my group that when we start a new campaign (we have three in the works, one is a super villain campaign) I would make a rules lawyer. In HERO system you can actually make a character that is based around reducing/stopping/stealing other characters powers, so the idea of a character who walks around with a book literally rewriting the rules by going "oh, you think you have a 10 dice kill fireball? Well, now fireballs are limited to 4 dice normal damage" isn't all that ridiculous, but its still a concept more about funny then serious.

[Asahel24601]

If playing a combat heavy game, saying I'll make a character like that movie with Hugh Jackman is absolutely cool.

However, the expectation will be that I'm playing Wolverine, not Jean Valjean.

Making him a Bard does not make things better.

Javert is, however acceptable.

Seriously, though, this is awesome.

[Sgt. Cookie]

*"Brian Blessed" is an appropriate Truenamer concept. It is not an appropriate Assassin concept.

[Kymme]

*This is not valid inspiration for an Infernal Exalted.

[Balmas]

*For my own safety, may not act as the maitre-d for the ranger's seduction attempt.
**Furthermore, may not get stinking drunk on cherry wine in the back room.
***May not then kill the ranger on waking up drunk, naked, and married to the catgirl that I've been working on avoiding.

[Afool]

*This is not valid inspiration for an Infernal Exalted.

On the contrary, I think this would be an awesome Infernal. It's disturbing, yes, but for the theme, the Undertaker is just epic.

[Ryu_Bonkosi]

*This is not valid inspiration for an Infernal Exalted.

** When told to find other inspiration, this is not an acceptable substitute.

[DigoDragon]

Things I May No Longer Do While Playing V: The Elder Scolls of Bad Behavior

Heh, I like this one.

What, did they enchant the orphans to be immune to asphyxiation too? And what about buildings collapsing on their heads?

Don't expect PCs to think that far ahead! They didn't wait long after setting the building on fire anyway, so the dangers of asphyxiation and building collapse were low. That and there weren't many witnesses (other than the children, who simply thought the ordeal was awesome) so they didn't get much out of it other than a workout.

[Arkhosia]

*My Dragon Sorcerer may not have a burn on the left of his face, a mop top, scimitars, red robes, daddy and sister issues, be an antagonist turned good, and be chaotic______.
**said sorcerer can't have a bard companion npc constantly playing this on a anachronistic guitar.

[Sith_Happens]

*My Dragon Sorcerer may not have a burn on the left of his face, a mop top, scimitars, red robes, daddy and sister issues, be an antagonist turned good, and be chaotic______.

Are you kidding? Zuko is so Lawful it hurts.

[Arkhosia]

Are you kidding? Zuko is so Lawful it hurts.

Really? I sort of consider him a chaotic character, but then again in my mind Zuko= a:Bad***, b:3rd season/good guy.
But yeah, season 1/parts of 2 TOTALLY equal lawful nuetral (he wasn't really evil in the "go out of the way to kill someone" sense, just ruthless, which strikes me as a nuetral quality).
Oh well. As long as no one objects to Benjamin the Bard companion (you know where his name's from. Don't lie to me!) who is notorious for breaking magic sound-enhancing artifacts.
Oh, and BTW
***No, the aforementioned sorcerer cannot have an immediate interrupt that redirects electrical attacks.

[LokiRagnarok]

You forgot mentioning HONOOOOOR!

[Arkhosia]

You forgot mentioning HONOOOOOR!

Oh yeah.....
****the sorcerer cannot try to take the wizard prisoner various times (phb wizard)

[Asahel24601]

*I may not give the Dirty Harry "You feeling lucky, Punk?" speech.
**Not even if it would fit my character
***Especially if my character's only weapon is a longbow.

[Arkhosia]

*I may not give the Dirty Harry "You feeling lucky, Punk?" speech.
**Not even if it would fit my character
***Especially if my character's only weapon is a longbow.

The speech only works if you're holding a crossbow: anyone can see a loaded arrow or a quiver's contents, but a loaded bolt? Maybe, maybe not, depending on the distance.
It works great for 3.5: "to be honest, I can't remember how many magic missiles I prepared today..."

[Slipperychicken]

The speech only works if you're holding a crossbow: anyone can see a loaded arrow or a quiver's contents, but a loaded bolt? Maybe, maybe not, depending on the distance.
It works great for 3.5: "to be honest, I can't remember how many magic missiles I prepared today..."

A wand would work fine.

[Arkhosia]

Oh yeah. Good point.

[jindra34]

*I may not give the Dirty Harry "You feeling lucky, Punk?" speech.
**Not even if it would fit my character
***Especially if my character's only weapon is a longbow.

***Also may not do so with a revolver that creates ammo in its chambers. Because that is cheating.

[Kane0]

So, new thread now?

[Ambrose Brodnax]

My character is not allowed to sleep during Boss fights
My character is not allowed To drop the roof of the temple on a boss
I am NOT allowed To declare to the tavern that the player playing a centaur raped me
I am NOT allowed to make my 6 year old chaotic neutral Barbarian a litch
I am NOT allowed to play a sadist lawful good paladin
I am NOT allowed to run a warforged druid named Megatron
I am NOT allowed to leave the party, mainly because they died when I did
I'm not allowed to seduce the main quest giver
I'm not allowed to Dimension Door how to every combat encounter
Dimension Door at the bottom of a lake is considered rude when fighting sharks
shape changing to another party members to give them a bad reputation is also considered rude
I am NOT allowed to run a drug dealer charisma character

[Ionbound]

*I am not allowed to play a Daemonette

**After the Creed Incident, I am not allowed to play a worshiper of Slaanesh

***Tzeetch is right out, as is Nurgle

****Khorne is only allowed if the character in question has a combined fellowship and intellect of less than 20

[Ksheep]

* I may not buy any of the other characters a pint of Johnny Jump Up
** Nor may I buy them a bottle of the Ol' Janx Spirit
*** I am disallowed from even contemplating purchasing a Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster, for me or for anyone else
**** The only alcoholic beverages available from here on out is rum, grog, and stout

[Sith_Happens]

* My campaign may not at any point feature a wight that was a small child before turning.
** I may not have it repeatedly ask the PCs if one of them is its mother.
** It may not wear a mask of any kind.

[Arkhosia]

* My campaign may not at any point feature a wight that was a small child before turning.
** I may not have it repeatedly ask the PCs if one of them is its mother.
*** It may not wear a mask of any kind.

**** the stone golems may not be angel statues
*****thie encounter also may not feature a lack of light
******No, my BBEG cannot constantly hear drums

[unseenmage]

**** the stone golems may not be angel statues
*****thie encounter also may not feature a lack of light

******The angel Golems may not be filled with Quintessence
*******No, it doesn't matter if you have done the math.
********Not even if it would take one Psion 2 full months of Manifesting Quintessence just to make a Small one.
*********Never allowed to play a Psion or bring a calculator to the gaming table ever again.

[Arkhosia]

******The angel Golems may not be filled with Quintessence
*******No, it doesn't matter if you have done the math.
********Not even if it would take one Psion 2 full months of Manifesting Quintessence just to make a Small one.
*********Never allowed to play a Psion or bring a calculator to the gaming table ever again.

*******The golems cannot have an at-will touch spell that time-warps someone.
********metal golems may not (or cannot have):
A. Mind-control
B. attempt to exterminate organic life
C. Have Exotic weapon proficiency: toilet plunger
D. Ask to have hearts
E. polymorph into horse-drawn carts
F. "Delete" people
G. Yell "Spaaaaaaaace!".
H. Ask for a weapon
I. Have force fields and roll around in ball shapes
J. Have a +5 vulnerability to Stairs
K. Run test facilities
L. Tell someone "I'm afraid I can't let you do that".
M. Try to kill 12 year-olds who are really irritating
N. Rule England during a war
O. Quest for a glowing metal mask
P. be named after a synonym for info
References respectfully

Spoiler

Show

A. Reapers
B. Daleks and reapers
C.Dalek
D. Tin man
E. Transformers
F. Cybermen
G. Space core
H.Master Cheif
I. Droidiekas
J. Daleks
K.GLaDOS
L.HAL
M. Terminator
N.Iron Lady
O. Bionicles
P.Data

Any other famous metal men, women, and Androgynous I forgot?

[Kymme]

*******The golems cannot have an at-will touch spell that time-warps someone.
********metal golems may not (or cannot have):
A. Mind-control
B. attempt to exterminate organic life
C. Have Exotic weapon proficiency: toilet plunger
D. Ask to have hearts
E. polymorph into horse-drawn carts
F. "Delete" people
G. Yell "Spaaaaaaaace!".
H. Ask for a weapon
I. Have force fields and roll around in ball shapes
J. Have a +5 vulnerability to Stairs
K. Run test facilities
L. Tell someone "I'm afraid I can't let you do that".
M. Try to kill 12 year-olds who are really irritating
N. Rule England during a war
O. Quest for a glowing metal mask
P. be named after a synonym for info
References respectfully

Spoiler

Show

A. Reapers
B. Daleks and reapers
C.Dalek
D. Tin man
E. Transformers
F. Cybermen
G. Space core
H.Master Cheif
I. Droidiekas
J. Daleks
K.GLaDOS
L.HAL
M. Terminator
N.Iron Lady
O. Bionicles
P.Data

Any other famous metal men, women, and Androgynous I forgot?

>Bionicles

You win this thread.

[Rockphed]

>Bionicles

You win this thread.

Which is just as well, since I just created a new one. Go remit future taxes to Pun & Pun, Rules-Lawyers at law