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Thread: Most Pathetic DnD Monster
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2010-06-17, 09:32 PM (ISO 8601)
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2010-06-17, 09:32 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: Most Pathetic DnD Monster
Yeah, I failed pretty hard there. Need to remember to walk up from nap before posting on forums. I's a gunna go get some caffeine before I embarress myself any further.
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2010-06-18, 01:53 AM (ISO 8601)
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Re: Most Pathetic DnD Monster
The funny thing is, it is the only core class not mentioned, as the explicitly mentioned ones are non-casting classes and casting classes are grouped together, which constitutes of bard, cleric, druid, sorcerer and wizard. So indeed, a level 40 Monk is only CR 20 by RAW... at least if it applies to a creature that has monster HD already. Level 40 Gnoll Monk anyone?
EDIT: Better yet, level 40 awakened shrieker monk.Last edited by Morph Bark; 2010-06-18 at 02:13 AM.
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2010-06-18, 02:11 AM (ISO 8601)
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Re: Most Pathetic DnD Monster
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2010-06-18, 04:00 AM (ISO 8601)
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- Jan 2010
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2010-06-18, 05:12 AM (ISO 8601)
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Re: Most Pathetic DnD Monster
The Donkey is the most pathetic. It might not be the absolute worst - it doesn't have the lowest CR, for example. But... it can get beaten by a lizard. A rat could be tough.
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2010-06-18, 05:39 AM (ISO 8601)
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Re: Most Pathetic DnD Monster
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2010-06-18, 05:50 AM (ISO 8601)
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- Jun 2006
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- Dinosaur Museum aw yisss.
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Re: Most Pathetic DnD Monster
Heh, yeah, that would've been pretty awesome. But I guess for some reason donkeys just don't have the same appeal as kittycats I mean, what's this guy got:
that this guy ain't?
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2010-06-18, 02:03 PM (ISO 8601)
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2010-06-18, 02:55 PM (ISO 8601)
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2010-06-18, 03:55 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: Most Pathetic DnD Monster
Devastation Vermin are just big bugs. They scare and kill commoners, but their touch AC is pathetic (only about 16!) and reverse gravity or flight will down 'em eventually.
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2010-06-18, 04:34 PM (ISO 8601)
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- Feb 2010
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- Texas. It's too hot here.
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Re: Most Pathetic DnD Monster
Knowledge is power.
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2010-06-18, 06:33 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: Most Pathetic DnD Monster
Just how many toads do you have to kill to level up one anyway?, I imagine vermin catcher commoners would level once or twice in their career.
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2010-06-18, 06:50 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: Most Pathetic DnD Monster
I'm gonna say the Flumph. In 4e, knocking it prone makes it helpless, allowing you to coup de grace it. I assume it's stats in other systems are equally as bad.
Last edited by Thajocoth; 2010-06-18 at 06:50 PM.
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2010-06-18, 06:54 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: Most Pathetic DnD Monster
A toad is CR 1/10, so it's worth 30 XP for a first level character. A single 1st level character would need to kill 34 toads to level. A standard group of four 1st level characters would need to kill 136 toads to level.
Still better than the shrieker, if it can do things when it's not prone.Knowledge is power.
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2010-06-18, 07:07 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: Most Pathetic DnD Monster
But the shrieker's power is basically "Roll on the random encounter table"
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2010-06-18, 07:14 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: Most Pathetic DnD Monster
Only if the DM does so. By itself, it's worthless. (Mind you, I find it a good explanation for what is essentially a summoning trap, but trap triggers aren't worth separate XP.)
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2010-06-18, 07:50 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: Most Pathetic DnD Monster
I think the toad can make non-proficient unarmed strikes for 1 damage at at time. (-9 to hit) Or it could TWF for 2 damage a turn.
It can also grapple you with it's -17 grapple modifier, and then beat you to death (-13 to hit). But only if you're Diminutive or smaller.
It can also gorge itself until it weighs 1 pound or more and then fall on you for 1 damage.
Or it can make a bull rush (-21 to the attempt) to push you off a cliff.
Or it can dip itself in poison and climb down your throat while you sleep.
Finally someone expalins where that meme came from. xD
What prc is it?
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2010-06-18, 07:52 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: Most Pathetic DnD Monster
I dominate the Yochlol. Not because it's a poor combatant, but because it fits the criteria of being incredibly pathetic. Lloth's 'most favored servant' is a disgusting, tentacled and shapeless handmaiden that gets sent to serve DROW PRIESTS at her command. Not only is being the servant that gets sent to serve under OTHER servants just about the lamest gig ever, it gets worse.
In combat, they transform into a HAWT FEMALE DROW to seduce their opponents. If this fails, they transform back down into it's normal form, violates them with tentacles in order to reduce future will saves, then changes form back to a girl and tries the seduction routine again.
Pretty much the definition of the most pathetic monster ever.- Final Fantasy d6 --- Building a Villain --
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2010-06-18, 07:53 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: Most Pathetic DnD Monster
Intelligence is knowing that a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is knowing not to put tomato in fruit salad. Charisma is convincing someone it's a good idea anyways.
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2010-06-18, 07:56 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: Most Pathetic DnD Monster
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2010-06-18, 08:51 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: Most Pathetic DnD Monster
Knowledge is power.
Power corrupts.
Study hard.
Be evil.
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2010-06-18, 11:01 PM (ISO 8601)
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2010-06-18, 11:12 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: Most Pathetic DnD Monster
Isn't there also CR 1/3 and 1/6? Or am I imagining things again? That still puts it at less than 8 steps below, though...Go balistafreak! Level up!
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Study hard.
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2010-06-19, 02:56 AM (ISO 8601)
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Re: Most Pathetic DnD Monster
I ran a module a few weeks ago, that had a harpy in it. She was used as a final boss, inside a small tower. All the monsters in the keep were dead, and a party of level 2's except for one character resisted her song. Her only weapon is a 1d4 club, and she can fly. Whup-dee doo. That was the saddest end boss ever.
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2010-06-19, 04:55 AM (ISO 8601)
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Re: Most Pathetic DnD Monster
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2010-06-19, 04:58 AM (ISO 8601)
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Re: Most Pathetic DnD Monster
No. Why? 1st level characters won't get any XP for it. We want it to be pathetic, but not too pathetic to be unusable. 16 levels of Monk in a Silenced area gives 1st level characters maximum XP, and can feed them more until they get to level 16, although it'll take a lot of them after a while.
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2010-06-19, 05:14 AM (ISO 8601)
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2010-06-19, 05:33 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: Most Pathetic DnD Monster
[QUOTE=2xMachina;8737053]Do you need prof to wield it? Cause normally, you can be unprof and wield weapons. Just take a -to hit.QUOTE]
The fullblade is a weapon from the 3.0 Arms and Equipment Guide. It is a sword so big you need a proficency to use it. Kind of like a bastard sword, only two-handed.
I once had a player play a fighter-type warlock variant, using monkey grip to use a large version of the fullblade. He dealt more damage with a melee attack than with he Eldritch Blast...
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2010-06-19, 06:24 PM (ISO 8601)
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- Oct 2008
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Re: Most Pathetic DnD Monster
Since when is this our specific goal? For that matter, when did we all get that very same goal in this thread? I was under the assumption that this thread was simply for trying to come up with the most pathetic DnD monster, not "the DnD monster that gives commoners the least XP and also couldn't do jack to them". I simply focused on that latter part.
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