Murphy's Law 4 (4 Times The Mayhem!)

[CoffeeIncluded]

Wouldn't this mean that you almost pity your future boyfriend(s)? Seeing as you're self-described as being of a similar level of energy...

Yeah, like anyone would ever want to be my boyfriend.

Yeah see, this is what I thought. All the half-elves I've ever seen portrayed are either happy and hyper or smooth/suave operators. I don't think I've ever seen one that was sad about their heritage.

Then I guess it's a Mary-Sue thing?

Actually, Lucrid is perhaps the only person who is not hyper most of the time. Also, I believe that Serrin has inherited one characteristic from him that will be amusing. (Shall not say any more for fear of being shot)

What was that one again? (PM please).

Serrin is adorable and funny, so of course we all like her

...Just make sure she'll never contract the dreaded disease that all characters in the multistoryverse shudder, often the sad result from authors liking their characters too much, okay?

But seriously speaking, I believe she'll be fine.


Speaking of other things, there was this little short story:

Spoiler

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This is really good. (I'll leave the judging of the language, word choices, etc. to those that are native English (I have nothing particular to complain of), and concentrate on the content.)
It's obscure enough to work as a prologue(or as a shameless attempt to tempt the audience), but not too much that you cannot get a grasp of it. The one whose thoughts these are, Alistair he was called, sounds a lot like a villain, at least he has a somewhat villaneus mind, if not outright evil (kills and threats sound pretty Evil, but then again, many things do get pass as Neutral too nowadays, given the right circumstances).

He is obviously planning something that recuires at least one of the two main characters mentioned. At least I assume they're both main characters, I think I can at least recall you mentioning the smoking albino before... And they seem to be somehow special or something, that's why this Alistair needs them. And high-flying plans he has...

Is this Melata gone for good I wonder; how much can a ghost affect things in Aequar?
By the way, that Messenger that is mentioned, I remember you speaking of "a Messenger Arc" concerning the current Murphy's Law -story, these have anything in common?

Buut, all in all, I liked it. The story moved along smoothly and you could follow Alistair's thoughts without too much trouble, i.e. the subject didn't change too quickly for it be annoying. Many hints, but nothing concrete, works for me. I hope the sequel will arrive one day, I'm already curious. This Alistair is interesting as a character too.

Hmm...I think that's all I have to say...oh, I also likeed the noodle theme, it helped holding the story together.
Can't stand the taste of them myself though, or the smell, makes me nauseated

Thank you! But what's that disease?

Thanks for the review, CWater. And the only thing I'll say is that Alistair doesn't care much for noodles, but they were Melata's favorite food, and he knew it. Kinda puts his oh-so-slowly eating the perfectly-cooked noodles while sitting on top of her grave thing in a whole new light, doesn't it.

Why yes, Alistair is arrogant.