Crack Pairings VII - Bring Bottled Water, Our Water is Spiked With Love Potion

[Zanaril]

Fortunately, Coffee, i think they're different continuities. O_o

Not quite; this is where they managed to escape while Tia was still a child.

[Lix Lorn]

Oh.
O_o
How many continuities are there now?

[Zanaril]

Oh.
O_o
How many continuities are there now?

I've lost count. 0_o

[CoffeeIncluded]

I've lost count. 0_o

Oh, so it's not just you? *Sighs in relief*

[icastflare!]

here is my continuation of Rogue Love. Its an ending, but I think I might just tick some peeople off with it. Oh well here is the show

Spoiler

Show

Haley saw the arrows strike the airships. She could see the wood being splintered, as the innocent civilians, and part of Julio Scoundrels crew struck down by the archers. But none stood out more than the bard falling straight to the earth.

Haley rushed over to her fallen lover. He was bleeding and appeared to have broken nearly all his ribs. His limbs were useless, he was inches from deaths door. Haley bent over his dying body, crying up a river. “Elan, please don’t die” Said Haley. “That’s a promise I can’t keep.” Those were Élans final words.

Haley was overcome with grief. She would never see Elan’s smile, his jokes, and his joyful presence again. What would become of her? It seems she just has to hide. Hide from her enemies, hide from her inner feelings. She was just someone who could not face the truth.

Haley roamed for miles upon miles. Wherever she roamed, she saw lovers and wish she could still be one of them. Haley traveled till she found the coast. Haley ascended a large cliff and walked to the edge. She said “ We will meet in the afterlife my love” and jumped off.

comments /critism , all that jass is appreceitaed

[Water-Smurf]

He'd probably try to talk some sense into his kid first, try to make him/her "see the light," so to speak.

Would what he'd say change according to whether or not his kid's a girl or a boy? What if they were a criminal for a reason he could respect? Like, he/she had promised to take care of her little brothers and sisters, and in order to protect them, it required that he/she get her hands dirty? (Really, really dirty.)

That's a toughie, especially since Soon's a man we don't know much about (unless there's more to read about him in OtOoPCs or SoD, neither of which I've gotten yet). He seems like a pretty die-hard Paladin though, so I'd say that first he'd put all his energy into talking him/her into Atonement, then he may try to Atone him/her using force (or he may just do that first; what's 500 xp to someone of his level anyway, especially since this his own flesh and blood we're talking about?). If all that failed, he'd either Smite away or... take the "honorable" alternative to Falling.

Ouch. *winces*

What if Mijung's potential children with the people other than Soon were involved? I'm not sure how he would react to them, especially if they were criminal. I think that the fact that they're Mijung's children earns them a couple not-being-killed points from him, but at the same time, they're someone else's kids, most likely a goblin's. And if his daughter/son sees him being casual about killing his/her brothers and sisters, I highly doubt that she/he'll be too open to atoning.

Remember the story of Brutus, father of the Republic? He found out his sons were conspiring to get Tarquinius back as a king. And so he had them sentenced to death.

Ouch. But what if it's not so easy? Maybe Soon's child, by virtue of being needed by the gods, isn't so easy for him to kill.

Happy Three Days Before Your Birthday Day, Water-Smurf! Hope you get to feeling better soon. And I hope for the sake people living in lousy weather everywhere that Spring gets here before too long; it's too easy to be sad when you're stuck in a long and stubborn winter. Incidentally, would a short-and-sweet fanfic of your work be an appropriate Birthday gift?

Thank you! :D And that's a totally appropriate gift. ^.^ ^.^ ^.^

Water-Smurf, I told you we wouldn't forget. Another Tia pic, my rendition of her, for you!

:D :D :D Thank you.

@Water-Smurf: I liked it. A little dark comedy. You don’t know whether to laugh, or be horrified, or be exasperated etc.

Thank you. :> I was trying to put a new spin on my usual style. Hopefully, it wasn't too dark.

That was funny. Very funny.

Admittedly it didn't have the same impact as some of your other stuff does, but it's not trying to be so serious. I love how nonchalant Tiasal is about the whole thing (although I suspect that after The Talk a lot of things are going to suddenly make sense). Poor Reddy; Tia's going to be asking a lot of questions, and they promised to answer them.

Did I get a laugh somewhere? :> I haven't stretched my funny bone in forever, and it's nice to know that this thing was at least amusing. And every time I try putting the real 'oomph' in a story, it's usually a tragic/depressing/bittersweet kind, so I figured that I could try my hand at light-hearted at least once.

I was actually thinking of writing out The Talk they're going to need to give to Tiasal now. (And maybe I'll write out the first time Tiasal gets a boyfriend/tells her parents that she's had sex. Those sound like fun scenes to play with.)

...Why did I just suddenly get the sense that this is gonna take a turn for the depressing once she connects the dots between this and the psycho cleric?

That also sounds fun to play with. How would Redcloak and Vaarsuvius be able to deal with that? Their daughter has been sexually abused, and she's going to need to be able to understand the significance of that at some point...

Oh.
O_o
How many continuities are there now?

I've lost count. 0_o

Oh, so it's not just you? *Sighs in relief*

...And this is why I need to make a chart.

[CoffeeIncluded]

Would what he'd say change according to whether or not his kid's a girl or a boy? What if they were a criminal for a reason he could respect? Like, he/she had promised to take care of her little brothers and sisters, and in order to protect them, it required that he/she get her hands dirty? (Really, really dirty.)

Hmmmmm...He'd probably give a little leeway, but not much.

Odds are he'd try to take care of it himself.

:D :D :D Thank you.

You're welcome.

Did I get a laugh somewhere? :> I haven't stretched my funny bone in forever, and it's nice to know that this thing was at least amusing. And every time I try putting the real 'oomph' in a story, it's usually a tragic/depressing/bittersweet kind, so I figured that I could try my hand at light-hearted at least once.

I was actually thinking of writing out The Talk they're going to need to give to Tiasal now. (And maybe I'll write out the first time Tiasal gets a boyfriend/tells her parents that she's had sex. Those sound like fun scenes to play with.)

Yes, you did.

Ooh boy! (I feel bad for the guy though....)

That also sounds fun to play with. How would Redcloak and Vaarsuvius be able to deal with that? Their daughter has been sexually abused, and she's going to need to be able to understand the significance of that at some point...

...What have I done?

...And this is why I need to make a chart.

Yes. Yes you do.

[icastflare!]

...And this is why I need to make a chart.

a chart sounds like effort, but it might be worth it.

[ShinyDelusion]

Nice Tia pic, Coffee.

School's going to turn off my Internet soon, so I don't have time for a long post. I'm just putting this up here. I'm calling it All in the Family.

Not too happy with it, but meh.

Spoiler

Show

(fic)

Thoughts?

I really like it! Vaarsuvius' parents are disturbling endearing (or is it endearingly disturbing?) as per usual and their brief interaction with a completely nonplussed Tia was surprisingly amusing.

licoot: SQUEE!!!!!
Bias caused by examining fanart for something I wrote myself aside: Adorable pic.

Sad ending, icastflare!. Your writing has shown a lot of improvement since chapter 1, but, personally, I don't think Haley seems like the type to commit suicide, especially when it's a little plausible that she could plot her vengeance and/or cart Elan around like she did with Roy until she'd collected/earned/stolen enough money to buy a Resurection from someone. Then again, she wasn't very together during the time when she was talking in crytograms, so I guess it's not completely out of the question.

Ouch. *winces*

Hence the However, I really think that with all the other possibilities you appear to be tossing around, that particular horror is closer to the "worst case scenario" end of the spectrum.

What if Mijung's potential children with the people other than Soon were involved? I'm not sure how he would react to them, especially if they were criminal. I think that the fact that they're Mijung's children earns them a couple not-being-killed points from him, but at the same time, they're someone else's kids, most likely a goblin's. And if his daughter/son sees him being casual about killing his/her brothers and sisters, I highly doubt that she/he'll be too open to atoning.

Also a tough thing to consider. He might just go ahead and kill half-goblin children of his wife's on the principal that they could have "inherited" a permanently evil alignment and are therefore irredeemable anyway. With humans he'd probably be way more enthusiastic about Atonement. I think the thing to remember here is that it's practically impossible that any of these kids (even the half-goblin ones, if he decides to give them a chance after all) can be high-level enough to stand a chance against him in battle, so forced Atonement is, by my thinking, the most attractive option in any of these circumstances. Then again, Soon might not think the way I do. *shrug*

Thank you! :D And that's a totally appropriate gift. ^.^ ^.^ ^.^

I'll start work on it today, then! (Happy Two Days Before Your Birthday Day, by the way.) After reading your latest work, I'm really tempted to do something with Tiberius and/or Aula, and maybe throw Aarindarius somewhere into the mix, if that's fine by you, of course. In case I do go with this idea, is there anything I should know about those two (and Aandy in your continuity) that hasn't been mentioned/flashed back to by Vaarsuvius in CoP? (I'm worried since I haven't read all your work, especially the stuff concerning Tia).

...And this is why I need to make a chart.

It would help a lot.

[licoot]

Finished MiTD

[ShinyDelusion]

Yay for lilcoot's banner!

[licoot]

Yay for lilcoot's banner!

thans

[ShinyDelusion]

thans

You're welcome! So, do you plan on ever writing a fic for this thread, or are you just going to stick to the art?

[Zanaril]

Did I get a laugh somewhere? :> I haven't stretched my funny bone in forever, and it's nice to know that this thing was at least amusing. And every time I try putting the real 'oomph' in a story, it's usually a tragic/depressing/bittersweet kind, so I figured that I could try my hand at light-hearted at least once.

I started giggling hysterically while Tia was trying to tell Reddy what the problem was.

I was actually thinking of writing out The Talk they're going to need to give to Tiasal now.

Is it going to involve awkwardly trying to dodge around questions?

(And maybe I'll write out the first time Tiasal gets a boyfriend/tells her parents that she's had sex. Those sound like fun scenes to play with.)

What kind of person would Tia end up romantically involved with? I'm having trouble figuring out what the boyfriend would be like.

Just as long as they're non-lichified.

That also sounds fun to play with. How would Redcloak and Vaarsuvius be able to deal with that? Their daughter has been sexually abused, and she's going to need to be able to understand the significance of that at some point...

I'd guess that Tiasal would, as Coffee said, join the dots up. Do you think she would she try to ask about it?

[licoot]

You're welcome! So, do you plan on ever writing a fic for this thread, or are you just going to stick to the art?

I'll probably just stick to the art

[Water-Smurf]

Hmmmmm...He'd probably give a little leeway, but not much.

Odds are he'd try to take care of it himself.

I don't see his potential offspring being too pleased that some guy claiming to be hir father traipsing in and taking care of hir family for hir.

Yes, you did.

Ooh boy! (I feel bad for the guy though....)

You should. He's got two epic-level casters, one of whom is guilty for the genocide of dragons and the other guilty of genocide of humans, the establishment of a goblin nation, and the enslavement of a good chunk of the southern population on his case. Or her case--not sure which.

Yes. Yes you do.

I imagine that it'd look like a sideways tree...

Also a tough thing to consider. He might just go ahead and kill half-goblin children of his wife's on the principal that they could have "inherited" a permanently evil alignment and are therefore irredeemable anyway. With humans he'd probably be way more enthusiastic about Atonement. I think the thing to remember here is that it's practically impossible that any of these kids (even the half-goblin ones, if he decides to give them a chance after all) can be high-level enough to stand a chance against him in battle, so forced Atonement is, by my thinking, the most attractive option in any of these circumstances. Then again, Soon might not think the way I do. *shrug*

If we don't take the variables into account, then yes, there's no way they'd be high-level enough. But the reader doesn't know whether or not the Snarl'd world goes by the same rules, and we already know that time doesn't flow, so they have potentially an infinity of youth and hardship to hone whatever skills they choose before Soon drops by. And then you take into account the gods--they're major variables in this and may or may not endow the children with gifts that make them a match for Soon.

And I doubt that he would automatically kill them, even if they weren't his wife's children. That's why half-orcs are tolerated in human societies, if not treated kindly, right? The human blood means that they may not be as Evil as their non-human parent, but it puts them in a lower caste. While they're not treated well, they're still not murdered like orcs and goblins.

I'll start work on it today, then! (Happy Two Days Before Your Birthday Day, by the way.) After reading your latest work, I'm really tempted to do something with Tiberius and/or Aula, and maybe throw Aarindarius somewhere into the mix, if that's fine by you, of course. In case I do go with this idea, is there anything I should know about those two (and Aandy in your continuity) that hasn't been mentioned/flashed back to by Vaarsuvius in CoP? (I'm worried since I haven't read all your work, especially the stuff concerning Tia).

Make any story you like! :D

Aarindarius is generally very reluctant to get into one of their 'encounters' together, but is sometimes able to be convinced if he needs to unwind or get his mind off things. And he outright refuses to do anything, even kissing, in front of Vaarsuvius or while she could potentially see. Aula and Tiberius are well-aware that he has a vague physical desire for Vaarsuvius and he is deeply unsettled by, and they wholeheartedly encourage him ("You'd be so good for her!"), but he insists that it'd be horribly inappropriate and he would sooner die than hurt her.

Aula and Tiberius have told Aarindarius and Vaarsuvius that Tiberius is her father, and both of them believe them, but they're not so sure. They don't think it matters that much, but in reality, there are plenty of potential fathers, Aarindarius one of the more likely.

Obviously, they all love Vaarsuvius very much and Aarindarius sometimes gets angry about their treatment of her, but Aula and Tiberius are so laid back that it's impossible to really be angry at them for long.

I started giggling hysterically while Tia was trying to tell Reddy what the problem was.

I had way too much fun with that part. :>

Is it going to involve awkwardly trying to dodge around questions?

They both know how much Tiasal values honesty, and they put a lot of stock in her trust. Vaarsuvius may be stony silent during a bunch of the conversation, but between both of them, they plan on being truthful and open.

What kind of person would Tia end up romantically involved with? I'm having trouble figuring out what the boyfriend would be like.

Just as long as they're non-lichified.

Probably someone who reminds her of her father/father-figures/brothers/cousins. But it's a much less twisted thing here than it is as Deirdre.

Actually, I'd probably need help with that. Who would she be attracted to? The species thing would be a bit of a speed bump--not a lot of humans, elves, dwarves, halflings, or goblins are too into someone who's half their sworn enemy.

I'd guess that Tiasal would, as Coffee said, join the dots up. Do you think she would she try to ask about it?

I don't think that she'd try to talk about it, but Redcloak would try to get her to, and he'd probably make Vaarsuvius help after a little badgering. If nothing else, they need to know how doggedly to hunt down Master in the afterlife and how painful they should make the torture.

[CoffeeIncluded]

I don't see his potential offspring being too pleased that some guy claiming to be hir father traipsing in and taking care of hir family for hir.

Depends on how desperate the situation is.

You should. He's got two epic-level casters, one of whom is guilty for the genocide of dragons and the other guilty of genocide of humans, the establishment of a goblin nation, and the enslavement of a good chunk of the southern population on his case. Or her case--not sure which.

Tia's significant other:

Aula and Tiberius have told Aarindarius and Vaarsuvius that Tiberius is her father, and both of them believe them, but they're not so sure. They don't think it matters that much, but in reality, there are plenty of potential fathers, Aarindarius one of the more likely.

...How...Many???

Actually, I'd probably need help with that. Who would she be attracted to? The species thing would be a bit of a speed bump--not a lot of humans, elves, dwarves, halflings, or goblins are too into someone who's half their sworn enemy.

Most likely a halfie of some species mix.

I don't think that she'd try to talk about it, but Redcloak would try to get her to, and he'd probably make Vaarsuvius help after a little badgering. If nothing else, they need to know how doggedly to hunt down Master in the afterlife and how painful they should make the torture.

Remember that loving description I gave a while ago?

[Zanaril]

Actually, I'd probably need help with that. Who would she be attracted to? The species thing would be a bit of a speed bump--not a lot of humans, elves, dwarves, halflings, or goblins are too into someone who's half their sworn enemy.

Maybe someone who is also a bit of an outcast? Possibly someone with a habit of defying authority, too.

If nothing else, they need to know how doggedly to hunt down Master in the afterlife and how painful they should make the torture.

Oh the joy of being an epic-level caster... although I imagine that the denizens of whichever Hell the Master landed in are doing a perfectly sufficient job already.

...How...Many???

However many people have walked past their front garden and been willing to join in.

[Lix Lorn]

Maybe a Half Dragon? They'd understand. Half Orc? Half Orc Half Dragon!
(Giggle. Me So In love. )
(Shot)

[Water-Smurf]

Depends on how desperate the situation is.

I suppose that the child would reluctantly agree to allow Soon to help, but s/he'd probably be very suspicious. I mean, it's a little sketchy for an old, physically fit and high-class man to drop in and say that he'll support your decidedly young siblings if you only drop your life of crime and thus, your ability to be independent from him and possibly run if this deal turns out to be not such a good idea.

Tia's significant other:

Way more than that. She also has one psycho big brother, one regular big brother, four cousins who have access to pointy objects, one epic-level fighter uncle, one outsider aunt, one epic-level cleric uncle, one uncle who is responsible for the wholesale slaughter of everyone and who would probably gladly castrate/mutilate him/her for even the hint of Tiasal being unhappy, one aunt who can hunt hir down, sneak into hir room, and slit hir throat without anyone knowing, and she herself is a sorceress who has proven that she's not above violence when she's angry. S/he's screwed.

...How...Many???

Well, Aula has a bigger appetite than Tiberius, and he can't always keep up, so she has unprotected sex with any old person who drops by. He doesn't mind, but it can make for awkward paternity issues. (Of Vaarsuvius's potential fathers there's an orc, an incubus, an aquatic hobgoblin, the father of the elf with the molten eyes, and a celestial.) Vaarsuvius is blissfully unaware of her potential ancestry.

Most likely a halfie of some species mix.

But what plausible mix could relate to her? I guess a half-orc, but at least they're somewhat common, so it's not as bad...

Remember that loving description I gave a while ago?

Oh, they'd do worse.

Maybe someone who is also a bit of an outcast? Possibly someone with a habit of defying authority, too.

A half-orc is looking like the best option, but s/he'd have to be intelligent. Maybe someone like Bozzak.

Oh the joy of being an epic-level caster... although I imagine that the denizens of whichever Hell the Master landed in are doing a perfectly sufficient job already.

He'd be in the place reserved for his god's followers. He's not being punished.

However many people have walked past their front garden and been willing to join in.

Basically.

[CoffeeIncluded]

Way more than that. She also has one psycho big brother, one regular big brother, four cousins who have access to pointy objects, one epic-level fighter uncle, one outsider aunt, one epic-level cleric uncle, one uncle who is responsible for the wholesale slaughter of everyone and who would probably gladly castrate/mutilate him/her for even the hint of Tiasal being unhappy, one aunt who can hunt hir down, sneak into hir room, and slit hir throat without anyone knowing, and she herself is a sorceress who has proven that she's not above violence when she's angry. S/he's screwed.

Please do a story based on this.

Well, Aula has a bigger appetite than Tiberius, and he can't always keep up, so she has unprotected sex with any old person who drops by. He doesn't mind, but it can make for awkward paternity issues. (Of Vaarsuvius's potential fathers there's an orc, an incubus, an aquatic hobgoblin, the father of the elf with the molten eyes, and a celestial.) Vaarsuvius is blissfully unaware of her potential ancestry.

*Is eating a buttered roll*

*Chokes on buttered roll*

Oh, they'd do worse.

Yay!

He'd be in the place reserved for his god's followers. He's not being punished.

Invasion? (And did you take a look at my PM? Just wondering.)

[icastflare!]

any comments/ constructive critisicm about the ending of rogue love

I tried to make this one sad

[Zanaril]

S/he's screwed.

Well power is attractive.

He doesn't mind, but it can make for awkward paternity issues. (Of Vaarsuvius's potential fathers there's an orc, an incubus, an aquatic hobgoblin, the father of the elf with the molten eyes, and a celestial.) Vaarsuvius is blissfully unaware of her potential ancestry.

At least we can rule out any non-elves.

...Right?

<cue joke about camels>

He'd be in the place reserved for his god's followers. He's not being punished.

Really? Damn. Then they definitely need to plane-hop over there and make his afterlife hell.

[Lix Lorn]

Can we write a fic where all of US planeshift over to kill him?

[Zanaril]

Can we write a fic where all of US planeshift over to kill him?

Unfortunately, I think that may break the rule about explicit violence.

[icastflare!]

Can we write a fic where all of US planeshift over to kill him?

now im proud to be an american

[Draconi Redfir]

...And this is why I need to make a chart.

or insted you could just write an e-book wich either barely conects all the difrent continueitys together, or just ditches all but the most loved as non-cannon :P

[Lix Lorn]

I could do it subtley. >_>
(plans)
Anyone want a speaking part? First person to say yes gets the ONLY speaking part other than me. XD
Preferably someone who can cast Hold Person.

[Water-Smurf]

Please do a story based on this.

It'd certainly be fun...

*Is eating a buttered roll*

*Chokes on buttered roll*

Yeah... did I mention that V and the elf with the molten eyes are possibly brother and sister?

Invasion? (And did you take a look at my PM? Just wondering.)

Yeah, but it takes me a long time to compose replies and I just got back from eating. We got ice cream sundaes today! :D

At least we can rule out any non-elves.

...Right?

<cue joke about camels>

The non-elves are less likely to be her father, but since she looks mostly like Aula, it's not too much of a stretch to say that she is only half elf and she just had the luck of looking like a whole elf.

Really? Damn. Then they definitely need to plane-hop over there and make his afterlife hell.

Yep.

I could do it subtley. >_>
(plans)
Anyone want a speaking part? First person to say yes gets the ONLY speaking part other than me. XD
Preferably someone who can cast Hold Person.

We're not allowed to use real people or characters heavily based off of real people, remember?

[Lix Lorn]

...oh. Awww. DX