Dominic Deegan: Oracle for Hire, Mk. XXVII: God Has Nothing to do With This

[SaintRidley]

I'm just bemused that, after three boring filler arcs, we've now got one that is advancing the plot - and it mostly consists of flashbacks to stuff we already knew and Siggy yelling "Karnak". Good grief - when Dominic had his mini-mindbreak in 2008 did he kill the plot?

No, he stuffed it in his pocket. It died of starvation somewhere in Maltak. Any semblances of plot after that are escaped gases from the rotting corpse.

[averagejoe]

I'm just bemused that, after three boring filler arcs, we've now got one that is advancing the plot - and it mostly consists of flashbacks to stuff we already knew and Siggy yelling "Karnak". Good grief - when Dominic had his mini-mindbreak in 2008 did he kill the plot?

On the other hand, the one panel arcs basically write themselves these days. For this arc I don't even think I'd have to alter anything, I'd just have to take a panel with Siggy yelling, "Karnak!"

So, yes, that's a tangible benefit for this lazy slayer.

[Helanna]

I'm ignoring stuff that could have happened off-panel and we wouldn't care.

Really? Because my list for that would have gone like this:

1)

[Trazoi]

Really? Because my list for that would have gone like this:

1)

I'm assuming Team Dominic's main plot objective at the moment is what it should be, which is "Stop Snuggly from destroying the world with excessive hugging". Any arcs about Team Dominic members getting haircuts, forming bands, increasing their coin collection or whatever is them faffing about.

So far, the list of people who have actively worked towards countering Snuggly and his agent TIM are: Celesto, Karnak, Demon Siggy.

Notice a pattern?

[Arakune]

So far, the list of people who have actively worked towards countering Snuggly and his agent TIM are: Celesto, Karnak, Demon Siggy.

Notice a pattern?

Evil doesn't like hugs?

[CurlyKitGirl]

I'm back! Deprived of the internet for three days, over three hundred lines of Old English translated, it's time for me to kick back, relax and read Dominic Deegan: Oracle For Hire.
I've actually been anticipating reading this, that's how fun I find my little proiect.
So, armed with a white chocolate and strawberry cereal bar and some cherry tea, let's settle down to another episode of

Analysing Dominus Deegan

The Golden Age*

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A Frail Hope of Adequate Enjoyment
21/05/2002 - 17/07/2002 Arcs covered: Oracle for Hire, The Curse
The First Signs of Serious Psychological Issues Appear
18/07/2002 - 4/12/2002 Arcs covered: The Curse, Luna, Into the Woods
In Which Teh Great Dominus Indulges in Torture and Terrifies Me
5/12/2002 - 21/02/2003 Arcs covered: Into the Woods, Couch Forts and Crying
Dominatrix Luna. Oh, and The Dominus is More Feared Than A Necromancer
22/01/2003 - 11/03/2003 Arcs covered: Makeover!, Mob Mentality
Thing Are Looking Up
12/03/2003 - 30/04/2003 Arcs covered: Visions of Doom Parts One and Two
Siggy Is Iesus. Make of That What You Will
01/05/2003 -23/06/2003 Arcs covered: Visions of Doom Parts Three and Four
The Great Dominus Is Officially A Marty Stue an It's THRILLER! THRILLER NIGHT!
24/06/2003 - 19/08/2003 Arcs covered: Visions of Doom Parts Five and Six
Character Development! And We Conclude an Arc
20/08/2003 - 10/09/2003 Arcs covered: Visions of Doom Parts Seven and Eight
Short Arc Is Short
11/09/2003 - 21/10/2003 Arcs covered: The Party

The Tarnished Age

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Hell Is Meaningless Filler
23/10/2003 - 20/11/2003 Arcs covered: The Ecstasy and the Evil Part One
Kink + Dominus Deegan = Eye and Brain Bleach
11/11/2003 - 16/12/2003 Arcs covered: The Ecstasy and the Evil Parts Two and Three
Inflatable Boobs and Sex! Occasional Plotting Is Permitted
17/12/2003 - 30/01/2004 Arcs covered: The Ecstasy and the Evil Parts Four and Five
Enter: Deus Ex Machina! And Boobs.
31/01/2005 - 19/04/2004 Arcs covered: The Ecstasy and the Evil Parts Six and Seven
Mookie Reveals More of His Sexual Fantasies. And Noone Ever Suffers From Any Effects of A Near-Rape. Ever!
20/04/2004 -26/05/2004 Arcs covered: TEatE: Parts Eight and Nine

The Silver Age
The Corruption of Sister Pam. Iocks Are Misogynistic Idiots.
27/05/2004 - 27/08/2004 Arcs covered: Hello Nurse
All Hands On Deck! Swirly Thing Alert!
06/09/2004 - 22/10/2004 Arcs covered: The Storm of Souls Parts One and Two
Darlings, Can't You Hear My SoS?
25/010/2004 - 28/11/2004 Arcs covered: The Storm of Souls Parts Three and Four

Attack of the Pointless Sub-Plots!
29/11/2004 - 07/01/2005 Arcs covered: The Storm of Souls Parts Five and Six

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Darth Tark is being eaten by a sentient WMD made of pure, undiluted chaos. You have to admit, there are worse ways to open. And the irony is ironic! Ironic cut-panel!
Luna, despite not having had any officially official teaching (what with being tusky and all) has magically qualified to study with the Advanced Mages in Advanced Magical Instruction. BY THE MAGIC OF PLOT! SHE! HAS! THE POWEEEERRRR! *cue transformation sequence*
And Spark mercilessly mocks every last one of Luna's neuroses and emotional problems. On the one hand, I'm torn between laughing, and being appalled that such a close companion of the Dominus would do something. The DOminus is right there Spark. That's his iob. I'm torn about this piece of character work, on the one hand: Luna's recognised that she' about as helpful as a bicycle to a fish, on the other hand, harsh is harsh; and Spark was harsh. But at the same time, I think it's a little Sue-ish. WHile I'd say Luna was competent or average with her spellwork, she doesn't seem Advanced Magical Instruction quality. Perhaps Intermediate.
It turns out that Mama Machina is basically the Saviour and Reievnator of the entire town of Quiral (I'm having Chamber of Secrets flashbacks to Professor QUirrel) and she's a pretty damn powerful mage. I'm guessing Fifth Circle Mage is the highest level of Magery around, so the town must be pretty happy with the Deegans right?
They're celebrities.
Oh. Hell.. No. Pointless Secondary Sub-plot Powers Go!
So, not content with a Climactic Battle between the forces of Law and Order and Chaos, we have Drama with a capital Dee.
[Insert swearwords of choice]. As much as I see where Mouthy Cow is coming from - I'm thinking she lost a child in the attack - that's . . . wow.
1) She didn't know her students were in danger when she left.
2) When she did find out, it was when TIM was already in Sexual Kink City, so vengeance was literally a few minutes and a couple of spells away.
3) She's a nonhetero-phobe. Or she's iust insulting someone who was on the bare periphery of what was happening until the very end.
4) If I read my comic right, Tim was ordered to kill Mama Machina. I think her being absent from an entire school of panicky young magicians is a good thing.
5) Because of the previous point, let me point out that if she knew beforehand (which we know she didn't because we had an entire reaction comic (I forget the page, and must to bed soon) about her receiving the news)
6) AN. INFERNOMANCER. WITH. THE. POWER. GLOVES. OF. A. DEMON. LORD. WAS. LOOSE. IN. CALLAN. THAT IS THE KIND OF THING AN ARCHMAGE OF THE FIFTH CIRCLE DEALS WITH.
7) Because of 6), I think it was entirely iustifiable for Mama Machina to go save the company from TIM. And,oh, I don't know countless innocents.
8) Mama Machina got her revenge. I somehow doubt that banishing someone (who is enternal?) to an outer plane - where I have no doubt that the Dominiverse's equivalent of the Great Old Ones lives - is a normal punishment. Mama Machina went above and beyond the call of duty in beating TIM to a witless pulp. With assisstance.
And that was me defending a Deegan's actions. In comic-time, it's been about eight or nine days since it happened right?
For a week Mama Machina's middle child was in a coma from which he might never have woken up!
Mouthy Cow is now one of my most hated characters.
In one page!
[Insert more swearwords here]. The problem with this forum is that while I could fully explain and detail my reactions to Mouthy Cow in that page, the general populace is more than intelligent enough to understand or find out what I would say. Suffice to say this is a bad thing.
Amongst my hypothetical tirade would have been words and phrases plundered from one thousand years of English literature, and various European languages. Such a rant is an art, and I may yet make an individual post in which my very censored feelings are made clear.
This entire character is a wallbanger. She serves no purpose but to get the reader to sympathis with the Deegans.
Mookie's character has more than fulfilled her purpose. She calls Mama Machina an "unfit mother" - yet the previous comic one of the arguements was 'she went off to save her son from dying'. Making her a fit, if perhaps overzealous mother. She is racist, disablist, nonheterophobic and she insults Elanovan!
Admittedly Wallbanger the Mouthy Cow does have a point when it comes to the Dominus. But that incident was at most thirteen days ago. Seven of which were spent in a coma, and two or three in Porno Land, the rest as travelling. Hardly homeless or drifter. I will point out that the Dominus was only greatly offended when she started insulting him.
Luna leaps to Mama Machina's defence! She is a proponent of balanced arguments, weighing up the pros and cons! Logic! Good sense! Good thing Luna and Mama Machina like each other.
Reaction shots, the Dominus becomes angsty and cynical - more cynical than usual.
Aaawww. Wait. Is that Lady Iayden in the middle? Confusing.
Aaaaaawwwwwwww. Say what you will, but Mama Machina cares about her children - biological or otherwise. I read something somewhere, to paraphrase and adiust for this occasion: a good teacher loves her students, and Mama Machina was a very good teacher. Because, frankly, there's nothing scarier than a mother after some git's hurt her children.
The memorial is genuinely touching, and I wanted to hear more about these students, but Mookie's love of Domini-centrism ('the centering of everything aroung the Dominus or one whom he deems worthy') and gorn gives us a Quickie Vision. Followed by vomit.
Black Mage's hat isn't covering his face. The Dominus is now insane. And yet more angst and Deegan trouble.
I smell Tertiary Drama Sub-plot.
Anyone else remember when this arc was setting up for an almighty battle between Order and Chaos that was surprisingly well-plotted and backstoried? Or that Iacob of Awesome cameo'd? Or that Darth Tark is being eaten by SoS?
No?
Iust me?
Time for soap opera Drama. Tabloids Twist Tawdry Tale To Treat Taggarty's Team. QUelle suprise. And the Dominus mopes. Wallbanger the Mouthy Cow is apparently called Penelope the Pain, she wants the school because of its retail value.
Wallbanger. Mouthy. Cow. Despise. Detest. [More]
Shock! Surprise! The Dominus is a second generation Deegan in this fight! Didn't my previous essay mention this? Point is: tell him what you know o he can stop the SoS before anything happens. P.S. The Dominus is blusing when speaking to his Daddy. It's the old romance blush. I call incest! Yay!
Young!Elanovan is hot. Old Elanovan is still good looking and -
Wait.
wot.
wot.
A heavily pregnant lady is going to fight a sentient WMD of Chaotic Destruction! It's Iacob isn't it?
No wonder he's got a couple of screws loose (and thus releasing his inherent amazingness) he's been infected by the SoS! Poor Iacob. It's all Almost-Mama Machina's fault too. Pregnant women should avoide drugs, smoking, drinking, and fighting sentient WMDs of pure chaos.
Duh.
I want to keep young Elanovan. Hug him and squeeze him and make him sing for me.

Yay! The plot! And it starts with some fourth wall breaking in p.4. And the Dominus goes into God-Mode again. Only uglier.
((Hey, guys! It's the Dominus and Luna! I mean, Mookie and Ladyfriend.))
Let me sum up this page: ugly art, uglier art, an attempt at symbolism, "Ah. My wrists! So limp. And I'm unFABULOUS!" Dmoinus saves the day, and again, SUperman has broken his right arm, and the DOminus can control demi-soul iars. Because he's Superman.
YOu will believe this comic rocks!
AAAAAHH! Colour! A flashback in colour. Unusual, but seeing as the art style is usually inverted, I can't blame him. Except it's in colour.
Alta Dura is the unholy hate-child of Lady Iayden and the DOminus. I am afraid. Oh, and gloating boy is ironically proved wrong. Ironically. So Gloaty Guy runs away and lives. There are now seven teenage magicians in a room with an evil wizard-y guy with hell powers.
Anyone know Avada Kedavra?
TIM isevil, and short black-haired guy took out TIM! Temporarily.
But still!
Heroic sacrifice? I love these guys. Going hand-to-hand and head-to-head with an evil INfernomancer with no eyes. Awesomeness. Totally deserving those memorials. Especially considering they knew they would more than likely die.
That is the stuff heroes are made of.
Three die, four survive, limbless. Wait, hold on there. Nimmel? As in Filler Guy Nimmel?
Eyeless FIller Guy Nimmel. And he's all sad because his best girlfriend is dead.
Dark. But considering that the Ominus Dominus was about a minute away from saying "Screw you Darth Tark," it's a good way to get across a mesage.
However, Nimmel = parallel with the Dominus.
Therefore Fem!Dominus = parallel with Luna.
Foreshadowing!

We started off with such promise, and then we got sub-plotted to death. Rarhg. My main issue is with Wallbanger the Mouthy Cow. That and a heavily pregnant young mage going off to fight a sentient WMD. Hello?! Sanity?
Are Deegans the only people who can stop thi dreadful evil? Because frankly, I wouldn't let a pregnant lady near it. WHo knows what it could do to the baby.
Well, now we know. And knowing is half the battle!

*Ages as defined by Trazoi here.

Next up!
Four armed sea horse! Luna is a magical protegee! Out of nowhere. And the Dominus has a headache.
Sadness.
And there's gross-out bodily humour stemming from PTSD!
Ummm . . .

@averageioe: That's a funny slay, no idea what anything in it is, but it's fantastic and it made me giggle.

[colonelslime]

Up Is Gate Sneaky

Link Future

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The Sphincters of Hell make a reappearance, but Siggy doesn't take any crap.

To save you all the trouble, here is a succinct summary

Pointless Siggy RAEG: 6 panels, Needless Flashback: 2 panels, Number of arms Siggy dislocates: 2

[ninja_penguin]

Wierdly enough, while reading that analysis, is it me, or is Mookie's art a lot cleaner during this period?

[Trazoi]

Oh dear sweet Luana, it's the last thing I expected; a strip that I genuinely liked. It's worthy enough to go in the Strip Slay thread unaltered. *claps*

@CurlyKitGirl: I see you've encountered one of the strawmen characters designed to present stupid arguments to make the Deegans look good in comparison. I wonder if Mouthy Cow was introduced due to flak from the Erossus arc back in the Keenspot forums. As a device Miranda Deegan has the problem that she's presented as so overly-powerful that you get the impression she could solve any problem if she really wanted to, so that might be why she needed some character boosting for her not properly putting up defenses against lunatics at her school. (One of the unfortunate side-effects of having powerful seers in your fantasy world is that you need to have a reason why they don't give warning of disasters like infernomancer attacks).

[rocketpony]

CURSE YOU, SLIME.
Also, haha, I'm a little more in favor of these cracks now. It's more about taunting people with their past than narrative convenience! (well, it is convenient, but there's the taunting element too is the thing) And you get out of it by rejecting it, by casting away who you were! Giving in to rage and violence etc. etc. That's almost a respectable kind of thing for Hell to have!
I'm not clear how he got the sword back without breaking stride, BUT HEY. Good feelings!

[colonelslime]

CURSE YOU, SLIME.
Also, haha, I'm a little more in favor of these cracks now. It's more about taunting people with their past than narrative convenience! (well, it is convenient, but there's the taunting element too is the thing) And you get out of it by rejecting it, by casting away who you were! Giving in to rage and violence etc. etc. That's almost a respectable kind of thing for Hell to have!
I'm not clear how he got the sword back without breaking stride, BUT HEY. Good feelings!

Huh, that's actually pretty creative on Mookie's part. I guess I has so much antipathy to the flashbacks that I didn't notice. A hell which just randomly pulls you down to make you relive unpleasant memories is actually pretty awesome.

[averagejoe]

3) She's a nonhetero-phobe. Or she's iust insulting someone who was on the bare periphery of what was happening until the very end.

Pretty much everyone with negative qualities is in the Deeganverse. And a racist. Or, rather, what the author sees as negative qualities.

I want to keep young Elanovan. Hug him and squeeze him and make him sing for me.

See, this is one of the big things that irritates me about the arc. The whole things is, "Mass slaughter is okay, but not if people we like get caught in the crossfire.

However, Nimmel = parallel with the Dominus.
Therefore Fem!Dominus = parallel with Luna.
Foreshadowing!

Interesting. You're right; however, like a vague prophecy, not in the way you think.

@averageioe: That's a funny slay, no idea what anything in it is, but it's fantastic and it made me giggle.

Thanks.

[SaintRidley]

Mookie is doing something effectively. I like it. This comic is the best thing in over a year.


Curly, you study Old English too? Awesome. I'm just began my studies a couple months ago. It's probably one of the most fascinating things I've studied in years.

[Khosan]

Is this comic supposed to be amusing? I'm not sure, but I'm certainly finding it funny.

I think it'd be all kinds of hilarious if that's how the encounter actually went. "Hey I'm-" *PUNCH*

Like some sort of Problem Sleuth-esque 'punch him in the nose to establish dominance' things.

[Humbug]

Wow, Mookie actually produced a decent page today. Better savor it while it lasts guys?

[Phase]

Siggy has a bit of his father still in him. Don't take no guff from nobody.

[TheLaughingMan]

Self parody achieved. Commence celebration.

[Glass Mouse]

Self parody achieved. Commence celebration.

Haha. My thought exactly.

Y'know, the weird thing is, I'm sure Mookie thoroughly enjoys writing evil characters. Anything associated with badassness, gore, violence and general Evil Is Cool seems to make him extremely happy.
Maybe that's why he's so bad at writing genuine "hero" characters. He's too tempted by the dark side.

[Thanqol]

Without going into further detail (since this isn't a WH40K thread), I'd imagine the Orks would kill Maltak Orcs on principle since they aren't "Orky" enough. It takes more than being green, tusked, and willing to kill each other at the drop of a hat to be a true Ork.

No... no it takes exactly that to be a true Ork. Anything else - like honour, magic, sparklies, or a language - acts as Negative Ork Points. Or, in the local parlance, YOU IZ MUKIN ABOUT

[M84]

Heyall,

Glad that Mookie averted another tedious flashback.

Today's strip was a good one. While not much happened, what did happen was actually pretty funny.

I'm confused: are we supposed to not like Siggy? If so, Mookie has a weird way of trying to convince us that he's someone to hate since he's the most entertaining character in this arc so far.

Edit:

@Thangol:

Well, Orks also need MORE CHOPPA!! and MORE DAKKA!!. Especially MORE DAKKA!!. Most DD Orcs have a distressing lack of both. Being vegans, they also can't appreciate a good Squig pie or Grot appetizer.

[Whoracle]

Not much to say except for a nitpick with the newspost:

Unsurprisingly, given it's Mookie, but surprisingly given his self-proclaimed expertise in metal, Mookie did once again not do the research:

IMMORTAL, bad as they are, are not Death Metal. They are Black Metal.

</metal nerd>

[Glass Mouse]

No... no it takes exactly that to be a true Ork. Anything else - like honour, magic, sparklies, or a language - acts as Negative Ork Points. Or, in the local parlance, YOU IZ MUKIN ABOUT

Willingness to kill isn't enough. Incompentence isn't orcly!

Real orcs use stunning arrows as tooth picks!

[SlyGuyMcFly]

I liked todays comic. It's genuinely funny.

[Kris Strife]

I think someone showed Mookie StarTrek: Wrath of Khan.

[Coidzor]

Like... Hellish Antlions.....

Hellions, if you will....

[Gez]

IAaawww. Wait. Is that Lady Iayden in the middle? Confusing.
Aaaaaawwwwwwww. Say what you will, but Mama Machina cares about her children - biological or otherwise. I read something somewhere, to paraphrase and adiust for this occasion: a good teacher loves her students, and Mama Machina was a very good teacher. Because, frankly, there's nothing scarier than a mother after some git's hurt her children.
The memorial is genuinely touching

Which one? The one from the city and parents seem heartfelt and genuine. The one from Deus Ex Materna is bling-tastic and just seems to be there to say "look, I can make a memorial cooler than yours".

However, Nimmel = parallel with the Dominus.
Therefore Fem!Dominus = parallel with Luna.
Foreshadowing!

Ah, if only...

Well, Orks also need MORE CHOPPA!! and MORE DAKKA!!. Especially MORE DAKKA!!. Most DD Orcs have a distressing lack of both. Being vegans, they also can't appreciate a good Squig pie or Grot appetizer.

Yeah, but they eat motile plants, which may have some level of sentience since they choose targets and attack them like an animal would. And the WH40K orcs are actually mushroom. So technically, the DD orcs would be allowed to eat WH40K orcs.

[Palmer]

Did Sigfried's hair get shorter when I wasn't looking? He's starting to look more and more like Nimmel...

[PersonalSavior]

No... no it takes exactly that to be a true Ork. Anything else - like honour, magic, sparklies, or a language - acts as Negative Ork Points. Or, in the local parlance, YOU IZ MUKIN ABOUT

So only elfes and humans got to be diverse? Other fantasy races have to stay strictly within their WoW-ish stereotype?

[SlyGuyMcFly]

So only elfes and humans got to be diverse? Other fantasy races have to stay strictly within their WoW-ish stereotype?

WoW-ish?

1- WoW didn't invent those stereotypes
2- WoW subverts the stereotypes about as often as it plays them strait.
3- Yes, this is a pet peeve of mine.

[CurlyKitGirl]

Curly, you study Old English too? Awesome. I'm just began my studies a couple months ago. It's probably one of the most fascinating things I've studied in years.

Yup. This'll be my second term at it. Can't wait to start the work on the Iunius manuscript and the works in the Cynewulf canon.

Which one? The one from the city and parents seem heartfelt and genuine. The one from Deus Ex Materna is bling-tastic and just seems to be there to say "look, I can make a memorial cooler than yours".

I'd say both, different ways of approach, but still meant well. Elanovan even wrote them a poem each.
That automatically makes them slightly cooler than they were.