Fatbelly V - Who's for Dessert?

[Dallas-Dakota]

Everyone take your cookies from DD as you enter, I promise they're not poisoned or anything.

Why would I do thaaaaaat? *smallinnocent*

[smellie_hippie]

Can I play?

@v You are awesome. Thanks!

[banjo1985]

Can I play?

Of course, the Baron's favourite Hippie is always welcome in the contest! The Baron still remembers the sublime food fight at Camp Sleeps'a'lot.

[Blood_caller]

nom nom im in if there is room, if not im just gonna eat a contester until there is room :)

[ThePhantom]

I'll be in too.

[Lord Fullbladder, Master of Goblins]

The Fullbladder will play.

[Castaras]

Been aaaages since I played a WW. In.

[Helgraf]

The Fullbladder will play.

Are you related to The Boulder, by chance?

[Qwaz]

in please

[someonenonotyou]

I am so in

[Lord Fullbladder, Master of Goblins]

Are you related to The Boulder, by chance?

The Fullbladder has been trying to think of a witty response to that. It hasn't worked, so all you're getting is this. Either that or "The Fullbladder is related only to the Fullbladder," which doesn't make much sense and is almost as boring.

[banjo1985]

30/30 players signed up, so signups are technically closed. However, I'll leave recruitment open a bit longer, as I'm rather busy at the beginning of this week. If we get another 5 players then great, we'll have a 35 player game. If I get less than that, then I'm afraid the late signups will be autolynch replacements on a first-come first-served basis.

[TFT]

Well, I'll take the first either/or spot then.

[smellie_hippie]

So just after a cursory review of the list of players, we have....

a cookie monster
a chicken
someone I help make a birthday cake for every year
someone whose glucose level I have been charged to help monitor
a pie-o-mancer

.... and those are just the first "food related" avaters/histories that I can think of off the top of my head!!

'twil be a food laden battle to say the least!

[Castaras]

So just after a cursory review of the list of players, we have....

a cookie monster
a chicken
someone I help make a birthday cake for every year
someone whose glucose level I have been charged to help monitor
a pie-o-mancer

.... and those are just the first "food related" avaters/histories that I can think of off the top of my head!!

'twil be a food laden battle to say the least!

I'll have to get a new avatar...

[banjo1985]

Qwaz is a pinata too, I'm sure he's full of sugary goodness!

Just sorting out role PMs folks, troublesome as they are in this game. Once you have your role PM the game will start in this thread, most likely on Thursday. Fiery Tower, you're my only autolynch replacement at the minute, so keep an eye on the game thread when we began and wait for your chance!

[Ramsus]

My avatar....doesn't eat. Does that count as "food related"?

[Duneyrr]

My avatar is most certainly NOT food related. I am not changing it, though.

[Ramsus]

Oh I dunno about that Duneyrr. I think your avatar is just a product recall waiting to happen.

[banjo1985]

All Role PMs have been sent, so if you haven't received one please attract my attention in some way and I'll resend. I suugest covering your head with jam and sticking it in an anthill. I'll hear the screams!

Next post will contain the opening narrative and contest, then the game is on!

[banjo1985]

It’s amazing how quickly people can work when threatened by a cannibalistic demigod, especially when they’re too busy arguing with each other instead of moaning about the back-breaking labour. As dawn broke on the day after Hannibal’s reappearance, the new Fatbelly mansion was ready for the contest to begin. No-one had the heart to say what they all thought, until Baron Banjo said so himself.

“Well…it’s not really a mansion is it?”

It really wasn’t. Six stout saplings supporting a shaking roof of old leaves and twigs hardly stood up to the previous venue. Hank and his Hungry Knuckles had done a top job on the banquet table though. Well made and varnished to a shiny gloss, the table stretched the full length of the makeshift roof and more. If anything it just made the leafy shelter look even more pathetic. Still, at least the warm sun and still day meant things weren’t too unpleasant. Except for the lack of food, ruined civilisation, and Hannibal of course. Banjo comforted himself by teaching Nom Nom to moonwalk while everyone waited for the nefarious host to arrive.

“Hah! I’ve seen better port-a-loo’s than this heap of crap! No wonder they say DIY is a dying art! I suppose it will have to do.”

Hannibal appeared at the head of the table in a cloud of custard coloured dust and insults, lounging with his legs over the arm of an ornate bone throne. He grinned at the screams of shock and fright that accompanied his appearance, showing a gleaming set of teeth sharpened to razor sharp points.

“Welcome worms, to the fifth Fatbelly Eating Contest! We start today, and go until everyone’s dead! Oops, did I say dead? I kid, I kid! A few of you will probably win unfortunately, but that’s the way contests work. As long as most of you die in a hilarious food based incident I’ll be happy.”

Hank and his Hungry Knuckles growled, and advanced towards the head of the table, their hands bunched into fists the size of sledgehammers. Mr Creosote didn’t move, but you could tell by the colour of his vomit that he was angry too.

“I don’t like your sense of humour Hannibal. Hold still down here on the material plain and I’ll wipe that pointy little grin off your stupid face.”

Hannibal smiled and clicked his fingers, summoning a giant two-headed and tentacled baboon creature right in front of them.

“Sit. Down. All of you.”

The baboon creature roared and thrashed its tentacle arms wildly, as if to force home the point. In the mad rush to the table nobody got trampled, though it was a close thing when Mr Creosote got up to rolling speed. Hannibal smirked and stroked the monkey monsters back as it retreated to the side of his throne.

“That’s better. The old Baron Fatbelly used mute servants, the Baroness used masked slabs of muscle, and Banjo used those damn performing monkeys. Me, well I asked my good friend Demogorgon to help with a little crowd control and he just jumped at the chance! Didn’t you Gorgy?”

The demon primate howled again and trained four beady red eyes one the seated competitors.

“So don’t even think about any funny business. This contest will be by the book, and I will act as a completely impartial but peckish adjudicator. As long as my Brethren win of course!”

Food Heaven’s newest demigod laughed and clapped his hands together. In the thundering din that followed two platters appeared at Hannibal’s end of the table, each holding a massive unmarked tin with a key on top.

“This is Spam Surprise people, and no I am not telling you what the surprise is! Start arguing, hitting, and being generally unpleasant to each other, and decide who should face off on this first contest. And remember, the loser could well end up on tomorrow’s menu!”

Summary

Today’s dish is Spam Surprise, a Spam Spam Spam Spam! Contest

Vote now for who you want to face the first contest. Remember, the two competitors with the most votes will face off, there is no 25% rule, and you can vote for yourself. If you have a named role, please remember to look at the opening post for the swanky moves you can pull off through the contest.

Day 1 begins now and will end Friday PM (GMT)

Get Voting!

[Ramsus]

Well Internet Flea isn't in this game so someone has to do it. I'll vote for Mustiado for being #17.

[Castaras]

Castaras grimaces at the spam. Ewww. She could do so much more ...interesting foods for these people...

She clicks her fingers, and all around her spam is transformed into pie. Of course, Castaras being Castaras, the pies are all amazingly delicious, but can cause some... rather bizarre effects on people. She looks around for a likely victim, and grins.

"Here, waiter, care for some pie? It'll really light you up."

The poor shmuck waiter doesn't hesitate, and takes a large bite of the pie.

"Hmm, I feel rather warm..."

And then he bursts into flame.

"A little too much chilli powder there, curses..."

Castaras summons another pie, and sprinkles a few drops of potion on the second pie, before turning to grin at Dallas Dakota.

"My dear Cookie-monster, care for some pie? It will make you feel like a new person..."

[Helgraf]

Scruffy remembers cleaning up after the old Fatbelly contests, murm hrm. Scruffy never thought he'd be one of the contestants, no.

Scruffy thinks it's got to be better than Marmite, murm hrm.

((Day 1 ... ehhh, cd4.))

[cd4]

Well as I have someone pointing at me I will point back at them Helgraf.

[Fleeing Coward]

Duneyrr because I can't think of a reason to justify my point.

[Blood_caller]

becaus somebody have to start pointing at Fleeing Coward

[someonenonotyou]

Duneyrr Because Inny Minny Miney Moe nevers lies. Never!

[ThePhantom]

Sighing from the lack of refinement, Phantom looks at Fleeing Coward, maybe he has something that could make this place better.

[Fleeing Coward]

Ok, make that ThePhantom for bandwagoning me