Doctor Who (again) [SPOILERS]

[CurlyKitGirl]

The Nu Who Trek continues. And now, to boldly go where many have gone before. [*cue TNG theme (I love that theme song so much)*]

'The Sound of Drums' Part 2/3 (Season Three, Episode Twelve)
Same format as before.

Spoiler

Show

Last time on my Nu Who Trek: I geeked out. I fangirled. The Master won. Awesome happened. And now, the thrilling middle:
I swear I've missed something. I've literally seen about seven seconds of the episode and now the Doctor, Cpt. Jack and Martha are back in the present. But according to IMDB 'The Sound of Drums' is the second part of a three-part serial. So huh. But on the plus side! I can see Vote Saxon [X] posters on the wall. Hello continuity. This also indicates they've managed to arrive about roughly the present (in that Mr. Saxon is still running for or has won the election), that - oh. Makes more sense. They were in such a stupid position because of the Vortex Manipulator.
That spacehopper of a time travel machine has impressive aim. (Hee. 00.14: it's a really gormless Bunny Face Martha! How do I keep finding these?) Points to RTD for mentioning this in the first ten minutes of the previous episode, it was early enough, and overwhelmed by the Awesome that I forgot about it until the Doctor said "Time travel without a capsule, that's a killer."
On the downside, this means the subplot about the rage-Sharpteeth was literally worthless. What did it offer? Seriously. It made the Running Man run, but they could simply have bumped into him and be lead to the Silo anyway. The lady rage-Sharptooth inside only really ripped some wires apart; so why not have an electrical system overload due to some technoTreknobabble. Then the Jacobi!Master let them into the compound, but there was already more than enough urgency what with there being a brand new, evil Time Lord running around.
Ditch the Sharpteeth and we miss nothing aside from a bit of ham, and some silly costumes. Instead, you could have given me more sublime Sir Yana Cadfael.
But getting back on track, Cpt. Jack agrees with me on their preposterous amount of luck getting to the right time when the Doctor responds with the impossibly snippy, "That wasn't luck, that was me." I am incredulous, and then we flashback! The Doctor sonicked Cpt. Jack's vortex manipulator to make it work. Back in the present Martha doesn't know where the Master is. The audience knows. The Doctor also knows. Because seriously? The place where they're all sitting is smothered in posters saying things like 'Mr. S is your man' (Mr. S, really?) and people wearing t-shirts saying Vote Saxon [X]. I am not making this up.
I'm really, truly, honestly not one for politics of any sort; I tend to get most of it from satirical tellybox shows like HIGNFY, but I sincerely doubt that anyone in this country, even upcountry, would actually wear t-shirts supporting a politician in an election.
Martha is finally told about regeneration, but let's ignore that because there's a tramp doing the duh-duh-duh-duh drum beat from last episode. Now, he's clearly not the Master, so I'm putting a thrupenny piece down in the Mind Control Or Similar slot. In case the audience didn't get this first time around, they slowly increase the volume of the tapping, then give us a close up of the Doctor with his SERIOUS BUSINESS face on, fade out the other noise and then do these weird fzzt! noises to cut back to an extreme close up the tramp tapping away.
But the Doctor simply says "I'll know when I see him. Time Lords always do" and then I find another Stupid Bunny Faced Martha Moment (01.13). Oh! And she finally clocks onto the many, many posters and t-shirts and things. And apparently the Doctor didn't get exactly who the Master was. *slaps self*
One should not apply extra-universe knowledge to in-universe happenings. And since when did (presumably) Londinium start randomly displaying massive tellybox screens like that on the street?
Things is, the Master is the PM. He look nice in a suit. We then get this honestly fantastic bit of dialogue from the Doctor. "The Master is Prime Minister of Great Britain." [onscreen the Master kisses a lady] "The Master and his wife!" I really don't know why, but this made me burst out laughing. No, really. It's his intonation and expression; as if he'd just found out a deliciously scandalous piece of gossip about that one person he never really liked. Huh. He just did. So why is his having a wife scandalous? My fangirlish mind says one thing, logic says another.
Master: "This country has been sick. This country needs healing. This country needs medicine. In fact, what I'd say this country needs, right now is . . . a Doctor." Okay. I love this guy. But first, an orthographical choice. He's so obviously calling out the Doctor; but in a way that rhetorically (as in 'the use of language for persuasive speaking', especially public speaking) also implies 'Mr. Saxon's' desire to fix the country. And that grin. Oh that grin. This guy is John Simm. John Simm has the most delicious faece eating grin imaginable. It's like he just knows the Doctor is out there watching him, and is daring him to come and play. And that music in the background is, well it's hard to explain, but it makes me think of one of the themes used for the Wicked Witch of the West back in The Wizard of Oz, and no, I don't know why. It's creepy and hectic though, so I like.
Intro theme. Writer's still RTD. Ten's theme is still really nice, and I think I like the background images more than in Nine.
The Master's getting many red folders. He's doing PM things. And he seems fond of the Wife. Oh hey, it's Not-Martha! And she's just got to "stand there and look gorgeous." What a misogynist, but it's Tish and I can't bring myself to care for her, and the Master is charismatic. Inside the Cabinet Office we get another callback to the 'Aliens of London'/'World War Three' serial when the Master mentions the room's been rebuilt. He seems delightfully manic in general and throws the papers around when he declares it's time to "let the work of government begin". Insert your own acerbic comment on the state of the nation here please. "Ooh go on, crack a smile. It's funny isn't it? Albert[?] Funny? No? Little bit?" This guy's great. There's some political technobabble before the Master says, well, what everyone in the world has, at one point in time wanted to say to their government. "Thank you, one and all, you ugly, fat-faced bunch of wet snivelling traitors. [...] No, no, that wasn't funny.
"You see, I'm not making myself clear. Funny is like this" :D "Not funny is like this" >:(. "And right now I'm not like" :D "I'm like" >:( "Because you are traitors yes you are. As soon as you saw the votes swinging my way you abandoned your parties and you jumped on the Saxon bandwagon. So, this is your reward." Throughout the last two-thirds or so of the speech the music (the one that vaguely reminds me of the Wicked Witch of the West, but is now the master's Theme) has been getting louder and louder, and towards the very end the drums have kicked in.
*dons a gasmask*
Everyone looks puzzled. I, on the other hand, am seriously loving this introduction to the Simm!Master. You know how there are two really important points for each new Doctor to pull off? The regeneration scene and his first big introductory scene? Jacobi!Master pulled them both off at once, and it was glorious. Now, I was a little dubious of the regeneration scene for Simm!Master, but this, his introduction has made him The Master.
With this scene he has become the Master.
It's like . . . for me Nine became the Doctor when he said "Nice to meet you Rose, now run for your life!" *waves the bomb, shuts the door*, that embodied everything Nine was. Ten as much harder to pin down as the Doctor, and I'll address that in a possible Ten Retrospective/Season Two Retrospective or something.
But this scene where he's in the Cabinet Room has made him the Master and perfectly displayed this incarnation's personality. He's manic, more than a little crazy (:D/>:( faces) and yet he's still a very poisonous, hating, intelligent person. And what happens next (yes I watched the whole scene before writing this, but split the scene in two for the writing) is just very him.
After a giggleworthy exchange he gases the Cabinet to death and then when Random Man says "You're insane!" he gives a double thumbs up!! Then he tap-tap-tap-taps. Yes, the Master's theme has been playing the whole time.
This man is. He is. He is CrAzY Awesome. It also deserves linking to to relive the experience. This three minute scene encapsulates what this Master is, as compared to the Jacobi!Master who was much more dignified, refined, quiet and very . . . he's a lot like what I imagine Vetinari would be if he were a Time Lord. Except the Master actually got his hands dirty and was shot. But hey Ten spent most of his first day after regenerating in a coma, so I pass that off.
So we cut to the Doctor in his brainy specs, and they're doing some computer stuff to find out out Mr. Saxon/Master. Martha has been gone (in the present) for only four days, meaning the Master went back in time to somewhere between after 'The Christmas Invasion' and the start of season three to concoct his diabolical scheme.
The Doctor's being all secretive about who the Master is, so Martha gets in a small tizzy, rightfully so, and listens to half a message from Tish, deleting it before she gets to the important part: she was phoned up "right out of the blue" by her new employer. The Master's coming after you Miss Jones.
But we cut back to No. Ten where Lady With A Bob is talking with Tish about wanting to see Mrs. Saxon. Tish fails at keeping out the paparazzi. She's from The Sunday Mirror. Well. What a trashy tabloid. Lucy is all cagey about being interviewed, but after being called Britain's First Lady, gives an interview. Newspaper Lady is also a misogynist.
OH! Newspaper Lady is bringing a MESSAGE OF UTMOST IMPORTANCE. She's going to die~.
Buh. Sharon Osbourne? Random dudes? ANNE WIDECOMBE?! How, cameos? Buh. Bet they only agreed to be on Doctor Who because it was Doctor Who. Because I think (according to a long ago HIGNFY episode with Boris Johnson) MPs don't get paid for appearing on entertainment shows. And the Master shot down the Sycorax!
The Master has an honest life here. But according to the Newspaper Lady it's all a lie. "The forgery is screaming out. It's as if he mesmerised the entire world [Hey! I was right about the mind control, pay up]. [...] Eighteen months he became real. This is his first honest-to-God appearance. Just after the downfall of Harriet Jones [Prime Minister of Great Britain, well former Prime Minister now]. At the exact same time they launched the Archangel network. [...] The Cabinet's gone into seclusion."
Given Lucy's reactions throughout this she either knows already, or is in denial. It's a toss between the two. Lucy says she's made her choice, £for better or for worse". And the Master calls her his "faithful Companion". Cue the Master theme! Also: Lucy as a Martha/Jack/Rose mirror intrigues me.
And Newspaper Lady's going to die. With trumpets. And basketball robot aliens. Lucy: "I'm sorry." And the Master brings up the drumbeat. It's coming closer.
AAAAAHHH! The basketballs have freaky modulated voices! And needle sharp and thin blades of DOOM! The worst part is that I watch a fair amount of anime see, so the feminine voice sounds a fair bit like the Tachikomas from Ghost in the Shell: Stand Alone Complex, and the male one sounds like Kamina speaking from inside his mecha from TTGL (both in the Japanese version, never seen the dubs), so this is simultaneously horrifying because Kamina is awesome and heroic, and the tachikoma are cute, so you don't really expect them to be so gleeful about murdering someone; but it's also funny because Kamina is wonderfully hammy and the Tachikoma are cute.
The Saxons run outside as the Newspaper Lady starts getting killed, he shutting the door to silence the screaming. Then he opens the door, more screaming, shuts it and makes an 'ooooh' face (11.02) which makes me giggle I'm ashamed to say. Then he does it again and put a fist to his mouth in a cute way, Lucy looks angry and walks away. She worries because someone discovered their masquerade, but the Master comforts her by saying "Tomorrow morning, I promise you, that's when everything ends."
Hands up if you also thought that was ominous in a World Ending Way when you first saw this. By the way, where did the Basketball aliens come from? Unless they are just robots. But my question still stands.
Apparently the Doctor fused the coordinates between the year 100 trillion and the last place the TARDIS was: Martha's room. Give or take eighteen months. Doctor: "The Master always was sort of . . . hypnotic, but this is on a massive scale." Martha and Cpt. Jack admit to wanting to vote for him, but they don't know why. Martha tap-tap-tap-taps away. "It was good. Just the sound of his voice." She doesn't know why she's tapping.
The Master's now on the tellybox, and he mentions the aliens again. All from season two. "And the government told you nothing. Well, not me", before showing the country/world footage of the Basketballs who apparently contacted the Master bringing "peace" and the usual bag of goodies. I call subterfuge. Because Basketballs of Peace don't then brutally slice and dice women off-screen. That and Lucy had crossed her fingers. "[A]ll we ask in return is your protection". These basketballs are called the Tocklafane? Toclafayne? Basketballs. The Doctor is aghast. We know not why.
Huh. Tomorrow is First Contact. Mirror-verse or normal-verse? "Tomorrow, we take our place in the universe [...] Oh, I don't know, every . . . medical student." There's a bomb - a proper type cartoon bomb - it even has DYNAMITE writ on it! - on the back of Martha's tellybox. Everyone's fine. Martha freaks and calls her family, for obvious reasons. "Mum, has there been anyone asking about me?" And Mum spouts some bull that Martha smells a mile off; but, no, no, it's all true, Dad's right here. Dad however, has more balls than Mum and tells Martha and co. to just run, it's a trap! The PiBs start doing mafia type things.
Martha doesn't care that it's a trap. And Dad is being Disappeared. All the Jones' are being Disappeared. Even Tish. Martha: "It's your [the Doctor]'s fault. It's all your fault." Mum finally grows a pair and tells Martha to run. Martha is frozen even as as a man takes aim and fires a semi-automatic gun at her.
They ditch the car even as Martha phones Not-Mickey, telling him to hide. Shame the Master's listening in. And cutting in. "It's been a long time since we last saw each other. Must be, what, a hundred trillion years."
The Doctor's on the phone now, chatting with the Master.
D: "I'm here." [The Master looks up, surprised, and instantly reaches for his own phone with desperation. Even the music tenses up like crazy]
M: "Doctor." [This is whispered, thick with emotion]
D: "Master."
M: [He shakes his head, swallows] "I like it when you use my name." [Said quietly, almost touchingly. Jesus this is getting slashy]
D: "You chose it. Psychiatrist's field day." [ . . . Let's not go there shall we? Let's! The Master; he likes control. Being able to make people and events do or go where he wants, when he wants.]
M: "As you chose yours. The man who makes people better, how sanctimonious is that?" [Must. Resist. Dirty jokes.]
D: "So, Prime Minister then?"
M: "I know [I must interrupt here to point out that he says it either very camply, or in a gossipy 'just catching up with my best mates' kind of way. But I also add: I've used that exact tone when relating a piece of salacious romantic gossip to a friend. Additionally: for Christ's sake! The Doctor's walking right past a trio of posters saying 'Saxon IS your man'. I couldn't make this up if I tried. Well, I could. It would be in slashy fanfic.] It's good isn't it?"
D: "Who are those creatures? We know there's no such thing as the Toclafain, it's just a made up name of the Bogeyman." [The Doctor's still all business though]
M: "Do you remember all those fairy tales about the Toclafain when we were kids [Oh. My. Giggy aunt]? Back home. Where is it Doctor?" [Close up of the Master's lips, floating up to his very nice brown eyes]
D: "Gone."
M: [leans forward] "How can Gallifrey be gone?" [Uh oh . . . the Master wasn't around to see the end of the Time War. Stuff is about to go up the proverbial creek. Fast.]
D: [looks down, solemnly. Pay close attention to the music people, it's slightly discordant] "It burnt." [How?]
M: "And the Time Lords?" [Brace yourselves. Remember what happened when Aang found about about the genocide of his people? Somehow I doubt that boy's got anything on the Master]
D: "Dead."
M: [eyebrows up in shock, mouth drop open slightly]
D: "And the Daleks. More or less." [Okay, that's very dark, in a tense conversation, but that little tacked on sentence made me smile.] "What happened to you?"
M: "The Time Lords only resurrected me because they knew I'd be the perfect warrior for a Time War. [I know you died in the movie, but . . . hang on. In the movie (which I haven't seen in about eight years) didn't the Daleks kill him?! Bit of a stupid move on the Time Lord's half then bringing back someone so dangerous even the arch enemies of your entire species would rather seen him dead than ally with him against you.] I was there when the Dalek Emperor took control of the Cruciform [I'm lost] I saw you[?]. I ran." [Why? Was he too dangerous?] "I ran so far. Made myself human so they [hooray ambiguities] would never find me. This, I was so scared."
D: "I know." [This exchange between them is just brilliant, they sympathise with one another's feelings about the horrors they encountered. Given Nine's personality I'd say they're both suffering from PTSD.]
M: [surprised, as if something just came to him]"All of them?! But not you, which must mean -"
D: "I was the only one who could end it. And I tried, I did, I tried everything."
M: "What did it feel like though, two almighty civilisations burning. Ooooh, tell me, how did that feel?" [Okay, that just took a turn for the phone sexytimes there. The Master gets turned on by violence? And with that name . . . I must be good. I must. Either way, I bet he's doing it on purpose to get a risereaction from the Doctor.]
D: "Stop it!" [It worked.]
M: "You must have been like God." [And I swear to Him that the Master gasped the end of the line out. Bloody hellfire people . . . ]
D: "I've been alone ever since. But not any more. Don't you see, we've got each other."
M: "Are you asking me out on a date?!" [While this is probably sarcastic, people these two have so much sexual tension between them at this point in this scene alone (remember, I've not really seen Classic Who in any detail ever) that you could only cut it with a chainsaw. I freakin' squeaked at that line. And Hell, then I remember how the Doctor felt and acted about Prof. Yana.]
D: "You could stop this right now, we could leave this planet. We can fly across the constellations if that's what you want, but not on earth." [ . . . Words people. They fail me. The Doctor literally just asked the Master to run away together with him.]
M: "Too late." [Why? Because you're married?]
D: "Why d'you say that?" [because even the Master has lines he won't cross, and one of them is apparently adultery. Say what you like, but at least he's loyal.]
M: "The drumming [he spits that word out like he hates it, oh, and he's tapping away] Can't you hear it? I thought it would top. Never does. Never, ever stops. [And now he's slipping into woobie territory] Inside my head. The drumming, Doctor. The constant, drumming."
D: "I could help you. Please, let me help." [Oh, he wants to relieve you tension so bad Master. *slaps self* Bad me! Okay, now a confession, I'm a Trekkie; and I also ship Kirk/Spock. One of my (many) reasons being the line "Let me help" (which in a previous episode ('The City on the Edge of Forever) is said to be a more powerful confession of love than 'I love you') said by Spock to Kirk in the episode 'Operation Annihilate'. So yeah. My mind, it goes places.]
M: "It's everywhere. Listen. Listen. Listen. here come the drums. Here come the drums." [Lots of drumming, everywhere]
D: "What have you done? Tell me. How've you done this? What are those creatures? Tell me!"
M: "Oooh, you're on TV." [This guy is seriously amazing.]
D: "Stop it! Answer me!"
M: "No, really. You're on telly. You and you're little band. Which by the way is ticking eveyr demographic box, so congratulations on that, but there you are. You're public enemies number one, two and three.
"Oh, and you can tell Handsome Jack [not even the Master can resist him, his voice even deepens] that I've sent his little gang on a wild goose chase to the Himalayas, so you won't be getting any help from them. Now go on, off you go, why not start by turning to the right."
D: "He can see us!" [And he's been watching you quite attentively too.]
M: "Ooh! You public menace [and that's a flirty, playful tone if ever I heard one], you'd better start running. Go on. Run."
D: "He's got control of everything."
[...]
M: "Run Doctor! Run for your life! I SAID! RUN!"
Seriously, see the slashiness for yourselves. Yes, yes, there's also plot, and tension and character building in there; all very very well done. But sweet Holy something or other, at points I was reeling from slashy overtones. This is quite a sadistic relationship these two have, and the Master enjoys watching the Doctor run. There is no way that was accidental. No. Way. Plus it means we also know the Master and the Doctor were childhood friends.
I swear, I'm a breath away from calling Doctor/Master canon.
Anyway, our trio are in serious problems. But so, it seems, is the Master as there are various clips of news shows condemning the actions of the Prime Minister for political mumbo jumbo. And then Teletubbies! The master likes.
Basketball! It bleeps and bings away in true Trek fashion and the Master says admiringly, "This planet's amazing. Televisions, in their stomachs. Now that is evolution." Okay, firstly I'm reminded of the clip of the Master watching the Clangers, and secondly, I bet you a squillion dollar-pounds that he'd love My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. Thirdly, I'm not sure if he knows this is a tellybox show and believes the Teletubbies to be a real species, or if he's just commenting on the fact that it's amazing humans would create such a show where a species could have tellyboxes in their tummies. He could also be drunk.
The machine will be ready at 08.02 and the basketballs are afraid of the "terrible darkness. And the cold. We have to run and run and run." What machine? Why 08.02? What darkness? What cold? Was that a vaguely, highly modulated Scottish accent?
Fade into a nicely shot scene of Martha with - fish and chips!, God, I could go for some chips now - and Martha's worried about Leo, but not too much, moreso about the rest of the Jones'. Cpt. Jack enquires as to how the Time Lords could create a nutter like the Master. Well Cpt. Jack, given your Magnificent Sexual Powers of Sexiness I didn't realise I needed to explain the birds and the bees to you, but here goes. When a mummy Time Lady and a daddy Time Lord love each other very much . . .
Martha: "And what is he to you, a friend or colleague or . . ." she trails off meaningfully. In other forms of media, trailing off while asking this sort of question almost always implies the last option is a romantic one. Runners up being family. Given that slashtastic phone conversation I want to say it's romantic. But Martha didn't hear it. She may have heard the Doctor's side though, which is slashy on its own. Either way, it's an ambiguous open-ended question. The Doctor replies "A friend at first" and the newly formed Master/Doctor shippers (and the old-guard) immediately squee with 'confirmation' of their pairing. Martha snidely says, "Thought you were going to say he was your secret brother or something," but I think incest would be a little to avant-garde for the Beeb.
D: "You've been watching too much TV." Eastenders probably.
There's some exposition about Gallifrey. "They used to call it the Shining World." Okay, to save another massive transcription, this scene kicks in at the 24.00 mark. And ZOMGMAGOG! GALLIFREY! ON SCREEN! With a city in a glass jar. And a face of imposing sternness imposed over it. And the music! OH LORD! Those collars! So silly.
So the Master saw eternity at age eight, looking into the Untermpered Schism "staring at the raw power of time and space, just a child, some would be inspired, some would run away, and some would go mad." Okay, first off, that eye effect where it slowly turns into the Time Vortex of the opening credits is perfectly subtle and evocative of going insane, secondly, this music throughout the entire scene is gorgeous, and I love how it got more intense as the eyes slowly went all swirly whirly. Also, does this mean at age eight all Gallifreyans are tested for . . . Time Lordiness or is it just the beginning of a series of tests to see if they make good 'field agents' or something.
Anywho, the Doctor wanted to run away. "I never stopped".
And Cpt. Jack now tells everyone about his rebooted Torchwood "I did it for you [the Doctor] in your honour". Newspaper lady was a Torchwood agent apparently. And the Archangel document is the most important. "Everyone's got it" apparently. It's a global communications network that transmits a secret tap-tap-tap-tap signal. The signal does many things like hide him from the Doctor and help him control the world.
Cue a science montage! No cave. And no box of scraps either. He makes three TARDIS keys, and the TARDIS pieces act as a perception filter to make someone unnoticed.
Blast it all. Doctor: "It's like when you're in love with someone, and they don't even know you exist." Said to Martha. AAARGH! Also, yes, I do think this is taunting Martha as I can't honestly say that I believe he's still one hundred percent oblivious to Martha's crush on him. And canon confirmation of Rose or Jack or both also loving the Doctor.
Okay, now the three are like ghosts, walking around very quietly. Don't make any sudden movements or noises.
Airforce One lands in Britain. There are police and armies everywhere. Also Mr. President is just a generic guy. Not even Jon Culshaw from Dead Ringers. And UNIT! AWESOME! And yes, I know about UNIT because my mother mentioned that one reason her Doctor is Three is because she really enjoyed his interactions with UNIT and the Brigadier.
I guess they moved locations though if the President is in control of them now. I was under the impression it was a British thing. What with the leader being called the Brigadier and all.
There's some stuff about First Contact being in violation of a convention set up in 1968, but the Master is awesome. "Well, you know what it's like. new job, all that paperwork. I think it's down the back of the settee, I found a pen, a sweet, a bus ticket and er, have you met the wife?" Flippancy in the face of an armed threat to remove him from office, if the UN finds it necessary. I don't think the UN can do that, but who cares!
President: "Are you taking this seriously?" Oh no, he is not. He's zipped his lips, mumbles and then unzips his lips.
(The Doctor and co. are watching this) So there' an airship called the Valiant. The President's taken over this thing, and the Master remarks just perkily, "The last President of America." And then he looks at the Doctor et al. AND HIS GREATCOAT HAS A RED SILK LINING THAT FLAPS IN THE BREEZE! Oh, and the Doctor and the Master totally have a moment of meaningful contact even if they 'can't see each other'.
Then an ambulance rolls up with the Jones' in. Things happen. Jack suggests the perfectly reasonable action of simply breaking his neck. Hey. It'd work. Except, well, regeneration. And then the Doctor responds with this absolute gem of a line. "He's my responsibility. I'm not here to kill him. I'm here to save him."
'Save' him.
I dissolved into muffled cackles of gleeful in-jokes. It's a long story, but essentially; I also do a blind read through and review of Dominic Deegan for the snarking thread down in the Webcomics subforum. There's a particular incident, an extremely infamous one, in which one character had to 'save' another character (in their retconned backstory) from death by well, having sex with her. Against her will. When she was a young child and he was slightly older. Here's the page in question. Panels two and six. So the word 'save' in the snarkdom has become something of a darkly funny in-joke as a result. Especially in certain contexts.
And well. Given the slashy subtext, and . . . you can see where I'm going. There are numerous comments I could make, but I won't.
The Valiant is a UNIT ship. And the Vortex Manipulator is now a teleporter of Plot Convenience. They're on the Valiant now. But it's dawn. Also: it's an airship. An extremely impressive one. Kind of like - okay, strikingly similar too - cloudbase from the Captain Scarlet and the Mysterons show from the 1960s. It's a great show, check it out, not the CGI one, but the puppet one. HEY! Wikipedia stole my idea from me. Check out the Popular Culture section. Well, there goes my 'unique' insights into Doctor Who. Not that they were ever unique or interesting anyway.
Now we're in the . . . briefing room? And the Master says, "I could make tea. Or isn't that American enough? I could make grits". Oh, the Master helped design this place. This is problematic for everyone who isn't the Master then.
The Doctor hears something that makes him grin. The music? It's rpetty cool. Nope. It's the TARDIS. Except the interior's all red and EVIL. "Sounds like it's sick." Martha says, sounding horrified, and it kind of does.
The Doctor says he's "cannibalised the TARDIS"; it's now a Paradox Machine. That certainly doesn't sound good. Also, they're both ignoring Martha. The bad thing is that 08.02 is when the Paradox Machine is set to go off, and that's what to Basketballs are waiting for.
HEE! The Master and Lucy are eating jelly babies! They are certainly scrummy, no wonder everyone likes them, even Time Lords. There's more stuff on the news. It's not very interesting. The President is called President Winters. He also opens his speech with "My fellow Americans", and thanks to my earlier mention of missed moments of funny, I thought of this. And this. In retrospect, having Culshaw in the episode would ruin the dramatic element.
The music here is very X-FIles. Also, while the Doctor is reminding everyone about the perception filter the Master is grinning in the foreground. While it is most likely because of the massive joke the Master's going to spring on the President momentarily, it's also suggestive. Given the earlier moment of prolonged eye contact, maybe the Master can see through the perception filter.
The Basketballs appear. They go vwing. The Master's still smirking as the President introduces himself. The Basketballs go "You're not the Master."
"We like the Mister Master."
"We don't. Like. You." [Why do they sound so cute?]
The President is confused, the - oh dearie me, "I'll accept mastery over you, if that is God's will." Aaaaawkward. By the way, the Basketballs are swarming around like like evil little fishies. Fishies shaped like the Death Star, but who have many, many thin and pointy sharp needles of DOOM! instead of lazors that can explode planets. So not like the Death Star at all then. More like whirling dervishes of extreme pain.
"The Master is our friend."
"Where's our Master? Pretty please." Okay, and that's a marker of innocence or childishness. As is the refusal to speak to anyone but their 'friend'.
I don't like the implications of this.
I will ignore them.
Even if their intonation is really off.
The Master bursts in happily, "Oh all right then. It's me. HALLAAAA! *jazz hands* Sorry, sorry. I have this effect. People get obsessed. Is it the smile [yes], is it the aftershave [can't smell it I'm afraid],is it the capacity to laugh at myself [and grin insanely while you're murdering people and devising the crime to top all crimes. Heh, and that reference is perfect on at least three layers I can think of.] Oh, it's crazy" He really is very charismatic.
Huh. The Basketballs do have lazors. My mistake. The President is dead now. People freak. The Master cackles.
The music goes all loud and epic. And the master takes control. "Peoples of the earth, please attend, carefully." The Doctor charges, but is stopped.
M: "We meet at least Doctor. [...] Do you think the perception filter's going to work on me? [Hey! I called it! That's sweet!] Oh, it's the girly and the freak. Although I'm not sure which one's which." Ah, master, how delightfully unPC you are. Then he lazors Cpt. Jack to death. With his "laser screwdriver. Who'd have a sonic?" he says as he winks flrtatiously at the Doctor. Christ Almighty, they're about half a step away from ripping the clothes off one another at this rate. They've had the childhood friendship, the sexual tension, the phone sex, now they're showing off their toys . . .
This can't get any slashier without needing the episode to be aired post-Watershed.
Whoa. Scary moment: M: "He's not going to be dead for long, so I get to kill him again!" And the Master almost certainly has many ways he can kill Cpt. Jack. Endlessly. This is cool, but also terrifying. Just look at his expression, it's maniacally gleeful. Virtually a slasher smile.
The Doctor once again implores the Master to stop, and then, oh sweet angels of slash, I really thought this couldn't get any more text than it already is; the Master says (to the camera crew), "Do excuse me, I have a little bit of personal business. Back in a minute". The Doctor is personal to the Master. Always will be. Even willing to stop imminent world domination for him. The Doctor is thrown to his hands and knees in front of the Master. D: "That sound. What if I can help?"
M: "Oh, how to shut him up?" [I can think of a few ways] There's a callback to Prof. Lazarus, and then "I've been laying traps for you all this time [...] if only I had the Doctor's biological code. Oh, wait a minute. I do!"
The Master has set up the entire season (in the present day) to capture and defeat the Doctor.
The Master is officially the most gleeful, hammiest magnificent illegitimate son in television history. This episode isn't about the Doctor. It's about the Master, and secondarily about how the Master and the Doctor interact.
This is so cool.
He has everything he needs right here. And the Master ages the Doctor one hundred years. And the Doctor does a truly silly (and scary) spas flail of sped up footage. Ctp. Jack revives and gives Martha his teleport device.
The Doctor's a really old dude now. And the Jones' are here.
D: "The Toclafane. Who are they? Who are they?"
M: "Doctor, if I told you the truth, your hearts would break." [Okay, mildly slashy, but more triumphantly gloating than anything]
Basketballs: "The machine. Is it singing?"
M: "Two minutes past. So! Earthlings. Basically, um. End of the world. HERE! COME! THE DRUMS!" He sounds so apologetic before turning his ham up to eleven.
*cue awesome music*
Then a crack in the sky opens and a metric buttload of Basketballs fall out of the sky!! And Lucy dances. Badly.
AND HE BLEW A KISS TO THE DOCTOR! The slash-o-meter has exploded people. I know it was a gloating I Have Triumphed kiss more than anything, but for the love of Heaven there's only so much slash a fangirl can take! I might as well call it quits here and say Doctor/Master is canon. What more do you need other than a full-on kiss? A dance? A proposal?
To be precise (and back on track): there are six billion Basketballs. Oh! And that music? Wasn't the soundtrack, he played it as the Basketballs fell from the sky!
This really is quite bad.
They start lasoring and dicing people up.
M: "Shall we decimate them? That sounds good, a nice word, 'decimate'. Remove one-tenth of the population." Extra points for correct use of the word decimate!
Cue many voiceovers of people dying, because this was broadcast at six in the evening and is pre-Watershed. Also it would have been expensive.
Martha teleports away to solemn, despairing music. M: "I'm coming back."
Master: "So it begins at last. That the human race fell, and was no more. And I looked down upon my new dominion as master of all, and I thought it good."
Okay, this sounds like an adaptation of a quotation from something, but Googling it finds nothing but quotes from this episode.
That is literally how epic those closing lines are.

HOLY CARP! I'm waiting for the preview and I can hear the drums in the end credits!!

Preview thoughts: Heh. They actually had the BBC announcer speak over the credits and says "If you don't want to see a preview of the gripping finale, close your eyes." Sweet. Must be awesome.
Drums. Voiceover from the Master. The heroes and family defeated. Then running and shooting and guns and rebellion and big fancy factories and the TARDIS explodes!


Best Moment:
That phone call. And the Master in the Cabinet Room.

Worst Moment:
Eehhhhmmmm, you know, I can't really think of one; I think I was overwhelmed by the Master again. The first flashback was unnecessary though, it wasn't even five seconds long, and we honestly didn't need it.

Best Special Effect:
GALLIFREY! I've never seen it before. Has it ever been properly shown on the tellybox before? Then Cloudbase. I mean the Valiant. Also the Toclafane.

Worst Special Effect:
The silly sped up footage of the Doctor being rapdily aged. Also the Toclafane. Sometimes they just look terrible, other times they don't. Oh, and that bomb was comical in such a way it had to be deliberate; all it needed was a really loud ticking mechanism. And an alarm clock.

Best Actor:
THE MASTER! This is the second episode in a row where the Master/Prof Yana owns.

Worst Actor:
Leo. Everyone gave really solid performance really, so this is mostly down to time spent developing the character.

Number of Time MtM Obviously Hits on the Doctor Or Their 'Romance' Is Mentioned:
One.

Number of Times the Master was awesome:
Nine.

Slash Level:
Through the stratosphere. The only way it could get any higher would be to throw the fight scene from 'Amok Time' or Spock's death from Wrath of Khan in there.

Thoughts overall?
The Doctor lost again! And six hundred million people died as a result (assuming that the population of Earth is six billion on the dot, and I haven't massively screwed up basic mathematics, but it is ten to four in the morning here, and I fail mathematics utterly)!
I wish I had more Jacobi, but Simm really, truly is a brilliant Master! I don't know how he compares to the Classic or audio masters, but he's amazing. This was an episode devoted to making the Master awesome, brilliant, fun, interesting and, above all, a dangerous, psychotic villain who is an equal to the Doctor. And that's terrifying.
This isn't as much a wham episode as the last one, nor is its tone as serious as the last, it's very funny, and darkly so. It's still shocking.
I don't know who or what the Toclafane are, except it's something that would break the Doctor's heart.
I also think the Paradox Machine - oh God, Sexy! She's alive, so this must have - oh snap. What happened to Sexy when she was mutilated/murdered/cannibalised into the Paradox Machine.
Um. I think the Paradox Machine might explain some things in the next episode. Like how Utopia was set up, because it had been broadcasting for many years (decades? Hundreds?) and so the Master must have set it up for when he was human so things would happen.
Why? I don't know.
We'll probably find out tomorrow.
Anyway: that was so cool and awesome and crazy and scary and the Doctor lost for the second time in a row to the same person even though he'd done some sneaky planning! This means the Master figured out everything the Doctor would do beforehand.
Wonder what he's going to do to Martha then. Because if he figured everything else out, no way he didn't plan a contingent for an Escaped Martha.
This has also been the slashiest episode of Doctor Who ever in the history of ever. Ever.

[Szilard]

"So it begins at last. That the human race fell, and was no more. And I looked down upon my new dominion as master of all, and I thought it good." sounds like a reference to the bible: "And God said, "Let there be light"; and there was light. And God saw that the light was good."

[SuperPanda]

Responses to Kitty -

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On the downside, this means the subplot about the rage-Sharpteeth was literally worthless. What did it offer? Seriously. It made the Running Man run, but they could simply have bumped into him and be lead to the Silo anyway. The lady rage-Sharptooth inside only really ripped some wires apart; so why not have an electrical system overload due to some technoTreknobabble. Then the Jacobi!Master let them into the compound, but there was already more than enough urgency what with there being a brand new, evil Time Lord running around.

One thing it did was distract you while RTD palmed the Master and made him pop out of your ear a little later.

Utopia needed to have enough things going on to keep both the viewer and the Doctors attention scattered so that no one could put the pieces together until it was too late.

The Master is Prime Minister of Great Britain." [onscreen the Master kisses a lady] "The Master and his wife!" I really don't know why, but this made me burst out laughing. No, really. It's his intonation and expression; as if he'd just found out a deliciously scandalous piece of gossip about that one person he never really liked. Huh. He just did. So why is his having a wife scandalous? My fangirlish mind says one thing, logic says another.

After you finish Part III "Last of the Time Lords" you simply must go check out the Children in Need special from that year. It is a 5-8 minute mini-episode that takes place in the span of a scene edit at the end of Last of the Time Lords. The mini-episode is called "Time Crash" by Steven Moffat and stars David Tennant and a very special guest star.

The Master is mentioned and there is a question

Guest star: Does he still have that rubbish beard?
10: No, no beard this time. Well; wife.
Guest Star: Oh? *looks a bit puzzled or possibly troubled by it*

I won't reveal anything else about Time Crash but you simply must, must must, do up one of these write ups for it after Last of the Time Lords either separately or included.

"You see, I'm not making myself clear. Funny is like this" :D "Not funny is like this" >:(. "And right now I'm not like" :D "I'm like" >:( "Because you are traitors yes you are. As soon as you saw the votes swinging my way you abandoned your parties and you jumped on the Saxon bandwagon. So, this is your reward." Throughout the last two-thirds or so of the speech the music (the one that vaguely reminds me of the Wicked Witch of the West, but is now the master's Theme) has been getting louder and louder, and towards the very end the drums have kicked in.
*dons a gasmask*
Everyone looks puzzled. I, on the other hand, am seriously loving this introduction to the Simm!Master. You know how there are two really important points for each new Doctor to pull off? The regeneration scene and his first big introductory scene? Jacobi!Master pulled them both off at once, and it was glorious. Now, I was a little dubious of the regeneration scene for Simm!Master, but this, his introduction has made him The Master.
With this scene he has become the Master.
It's like . . . for me Nine became the Doctor when he said "Nice to meet you Rose, now run for your life!" *waves the bomb, shuts the door*, that embodied everything Nine was. Ten as much harder to pin down as the Doctor, and I'll address that in a possible Ten Retrospective/Season Two Retrospective or something.
But this scene where he's in the Cabinet Room has made him the Master and perfectly displayed this incarnation's personality. He's manic, more than a little crazy (:D/>:( faces) and yet he's still a very poisonous, hating, intelligent person. And what happens next (yes I watched the whole scene before writing this, but split the scene in two for the writing) is just very him.
After a giggleworthy exchange he gases the Cabinet to death and then when Random Man says "You're insane!" he gives a double thumbs up!! Then he tap-tap-tap-taps. Yes, the Master's theme has been playing the whole time.
This man is. He is. He is CrAzY Awesome. It also deserves linking to to relive the experience. This three minute scene encapsulates what this Master is, as compared to the Jacobi!Master who was much more dignified, refined, quiet and very . . . he's a lot like what I imagine Vetinari would be if he were a Time Lord. Except the Master actually got his hands dirty and was shot. But hey Ten spent most of his first day after regenerating in a coma, so I pass that off.

Random (R) :"What are you wearing sir?"
Master (M): "mmummumm"
R: "I'm sorry what?"
M: "Its a gas mask."
R: "Quite, and why are you wearing it?"
M: mmmummmummmgm
R: Sir?
M: Because of the gas (evil grin)
R: What gas?
M: Rrrummgmm.

- The first time I saw this scene My first thought was "Mummy?" my second thought was "bad, bad... no bad." My third and final thought was... so this is how a live action looney toons routine would look.

I loved the whole thing and this Master is probably my favorite TV villain ever.

Doctor: "It's like when you're in love with someone, and they don't even know you exist." Said to Martha. AAARGH! Also, yes, I do think this is taunting Martha as I can't honestly say that I believe he's still one hundred percent oblivious to Martha's crush on him. And canon confirmation of Rose or Jack or both also loving the Doctor.

Watch it again and look at his facial expression. He's so happy when he uses that analogy. Oh, and he does know that Martha likes him. He remembered being John Smith at the end of Family of Blood... so that means he knows about Martha's confession.

By this time though Martha had started taking a turn for the better and she had become a companion that I really truely liked taking her in the opposite direction Rose had. Rose started off half interesting and then slowly decayed (for me) until I was more annoyed than excited to hear her referenced. Martha started off as very mild but grew into one of my favorite companions because she never stopped seeming like a real person, but largely because she had times when she showed that she had what it takes to be a hero too.

There are police and armies everywhere. Also Mr. President is just a generic guy. Not even Jon Culshaw from Dead Ringers. And UNIT! AWESOME! And yes, I know about UNIT because my mother mentioned that one reason her Doctor is Three is because she really enjoyed his interactions with UNIT and the Brigadier.
I guess they moved locations though if the President is in control of them now. I was under the impression it was a British thing. What with the leader being called the Brigadier and all.

United Nations Intelligence Task-force

I think the original Unit was either underfunded or only the British arm of it. Torchwood is specifically British (though should be getting American reinforcements in late June).

The Master and Lucy are eating jelly babies!

While waiting for the show to continue into season 4 durring my first viewing I had found an old Dr. Who role playing game. The fluff mentioned that "Would you like a Jelly Baby" was pretty much 4's way of distracting people by convincing them that they are harmless. So in another Master/Doctor moment, the Master is at the same time using one of the Doctor's old Schticks and mocking him in the process. It also means that this Master's Doctor was Tom Baker.

"You never forget your first Doctor."

Sort of Spoiler about the Tochlafane. All I've done is put clues you recognized next to each other but even then, for Maximum enjoyment wait until after the next episode and then come back to this.

Spoiler

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Was that a vaguely, highly modulated Scottish accent?

Okay, and that's a marker of innocence or childishness. As is the refusal to speak to anyone but their 'friend'.
I don't like the implications of this.
I will ignore them.

Like how Utopia was set up, because it had been broadcasting for many years (decades? Hundreds?) and so the Master must have set it up for when he was human so things would happen.
Why? I don't know.

D: "The Toclafane. Who are they? Who are they?"
M: Oh, If I told you. Your hearts, would break

For those who have seen Last of the Time Lords:

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With Vote Saxon, You Are Not Alone, and everything that has been built up so very well through this serial I can forgive and even ignore the cheesy FX of Archangel Doctor.

.

Being male I don't think I enjoyed the Slash quite as much as you did, though I think I'm glad that the Slash points were Simms and not Jacobi - though I am sure you've already dreamed of Tennant / Jacobi at some point. I read somewhere online that there has always been a certain level of slashy tension between the Master and the Doctor, I think RTD deliberately played with that the same way he played with the internet jokes about Dalek's and Stairs. in Season 1 Dalek.

Of course, after this seeing this episode I have a tendency to walk around tapping out "duh duh duh duh *rest* duh duh duh duh *rest duh duh duh duh" Its far too catchy. I can hear the drums, the drums, the never ending drumbeat... closer than ever before.

[Kato]

Oooh yes, Simms is an awesome Master, I don't think you could deny that. Though, I didn't get such strong slash vibes I guess they were kind of there but... he, if you enjoy it, declare canon whatever you want

Hu? Tachikoma- and Kamina-basketballs? Great now, I need to go and check if I hear that, too... Though, I'd not want to think of those next time I watch TTGL... *shudder*

Well, no time to go into more detail but great review nonetheless. Though now I'm really curious about your reaction to... Last of the Timelords...
But yeah, beware the truth about the Tochlafane... *gulp*

[Archonic Energy]

@ CKG
don't worry i'm not gonna spoil anything...

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Damn it the Drums are in my head now... it took ages to get them out last time!


oh and with this being RTD i wouldn't be suprised if Doctor/Master was canon

i bet money your "slash-o-meter" explodes before the end of LotTL

Also, i really should dig out my box-sets & re-watch the tennent era.

RE: River's Secret

my sis makes me laugh, she hates Smith & wants Tennant back.
she refuses to watch DW now but still want's me to tell her about River who she also hates... obviously i'm refusing as to know the end without caring about the journey is just dumb!

[Eldan]

Yup, the drums are back. I've been drumming on various pieces of lab equipment all day.

[The_Admiral]

@ CKG
don't worry i'm not gonna spoil anything...

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...- ...- ...- ...-

Damn it the Drums are in my head now... it took ages to get them out last time!


oh and with this being RTD i wouldn't be suprised if Doctor/Master was canon

i bet money your "slash-o-meter" explodes before the end of LotTL

Also, i really should dig out my box-sets & re-watch the tennent era.

RE: River's Secret

my sis makes me laugh, she hates Smith & wants tennant back.
she refuses to watch DW now but still want's me to tell her about River who she also hates... obviously i'm refusing as to know the end without caring about the journey is just dumb!

Whenever she asks just say to her "Spoilers"

[Aidan305]

Yup, the drums are back. I've been drumming on various pieces of lab equipment all day.

Ditto. I remember I was at a con when The Sound of Drums first aired. So much absent-minded tapping went on that weekend.

[Archonic Energy]

Whenever she asks just say to her "Spoilers"

heh... you must have read my mind

or it really is that Obvious, Captain.

[CurlyKitGirl]

"So it begins at last. That the human race fell, and was no more. And I looked down upon my new dominion as master of all, and I thought it good." sounds like a reference to the bible: "And God said, "Let there be light"; and there was light. And God saw that the light was good."

Virtually anything can be a Biblical reference or sound Biblical in nature.

Responses to Kitty -

Is there any reason you call me that?

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One thing it did was distract you while RTD palmed the Master and made him pop out of your ear a little later.

Utopia needed to have enough things going on to keep both the viewer and the Doctors attention scattered so that no one could put the pieces together until it was too late.

I suppose; but they honestly weren't an intimidating villain, and yes, they kept the Doctor distracted, but as I argued, why not just have the series of electrical problems?
If it had been a more dangerous villain it would have been an even more minor flaw than it was.

After you finish Part III "Last of the Time Lords" you simply must go check out the Children in Need special from that year. It is a 5-8 minute mini-episode that takes place in the span of a scene edit at the end of Last of the Time Lords. The mini-episode is called "Time Crash" by Steven Moffat and stars David Tennant and a very special guest star.

The Master is mentioned and there is a question

Guest star: Does he still have that rubbish beard?
10: No, no beard this time. Well; wife.
Guest Star: Oh? *looks a bit puzzled or possibly troubled by it*

I won't reveal anything else about Time Crash but you simply must, must must, do up one of these write ups for it after Last of the Time Lords either separately or included.

Children in Need mini episodes hhnnnnnmmmm? To the episode list cave! (There isn't a cave) It does sound very fun though. My favourite writer, from what I gather it's comedy based, and I want to know who the guest star is.
I am not only coloured intrigued, but outlined in it, printed on intrigued paper, but also laminated a very glossy intrigued.

Random (R) :"What are you wearing sir?"
Master (M): "mmummumm"
R: "I'm sorry what?"
M: "Its a gas mask."
R: "Quite, and why are you wearing it?"
M: mmmummmummmgm
R: Sir?
M: Because of the gas (evil grin)
R: What gas?
M: Rrrummgmm.

- The first time I saw this scene My first thought was "Mummy?" my second thought was "bad, bad... no bad." My third and final thought was... so this is how a live action loony toons routine would look.

I loved the whole thing and this Master is probably my favourite TV villain ever.

I'm trying to avoid making 'Are you my Mummy' jokes for as long as possible; then, when everyone leasts expects it: Bang! gas mask child!
But yes, it was a hilarious, classic scene that really did cement the Master as been delightfully insane.

Watch it again and look at his facial expression. He's so happy when he uses that analogy. Oh, and he does know that Martha likes him. He remembered being John Smith at the end of Family of Blood... so that means he knows about Martha's confession.

By this time though Martha had started taking a turn for the better and she had become a companion that I really truly liked taking her in the opposite direction Rose had. Rose started off half interesting and then slowly decayed (for me) until I was more annoyed than excited to hear her referenced. Martha started off as very mild but grew into one of my favourite companions because she never stopped seeming like a real person, but largely because she had times when she showed that she had what it takes to be a hero too.

Oooh, I'd forgotten about that. I wouldn't say that his facial expression really counts towards what he's feeling all the time. The Doctor, as we know from 'Family of Blood' is an excellent actor.
Moreover, as he does know about Martha's unrequited crush on him, him bringing it up and (possibly) being genuinely happy about it is harsh. Come on Doctor, have a bit of tact.
Martha's grown on me too in recent episodes, my ability to find her stupid faces asides, and she definitely is acting more mature than Rose did over their respective crushes and general situations. She is pretty interesting, and seems to be growing as a person. Then again, she was pretty darn amazing in 'Smith and Jones' before they started writing in another 'Doctor's Companion crushes on him' scenario.

United Nations Intelligence Task-force

I think the original Unit was either underfunded or only the British arm of it. Torchwood is specifically British (though should be getting American reinforcements in late June).

Yeah, I cheated a little and looked up UNIT, but didn't read past the first couple of sentences. It used to mean that. I'll run with original!UNIT being the underfunded British branch.

While waiting for the show to continue into season 4 during my first viewing I had found an old Dr. Who role playing game. The fluff mentioned that "Would you like a Jelly Baby" was pretty much 4's way of distracting people by convincing them that they are harmless. So in another Master/Doctor moment, the Master is at the same time using one of the Doctor's old Schticks and mocking him in the process. It also means that this Master's Doctor was Tom Baker.

"You never forget your first Doctor."

Nice bit of information there, and a very interesting idea.
You never do forget your first Doctor. I'm going to write a separate post on this later, probably when I'm feeling a little too lazy to do a proper writeup thing; but it's basically 'Curly and Doctor Who: Experiences of a Young Nerd' detailing my experiences with the show from way back when, to now.
My first Doctor was also Tom Baker. There were videos, old ones even for back then, and a cranky child must be entertained.
I remembered that scarf and hair forever.
There's a reason he is The Doctor. Him or David Tennant.

[QUOTE=SuperPanda;11204010]Sort of Spoiler about the Tochlafane. All I've done is put clues you recognized next to each other but even then, for Maximum enjoyment wait until after the next episode and then come back to this.

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*snip*

.

So all those things are one that may be relevant to the reveal? Fair amount aren't there. Either way, I shall remain unhappily oblivious until . . .
Whenever.
See, I just got my coursework paper released, and work must be done on it as I have a much shorter time frame than the average person to do it in.

Being male I don't think I enjoyed the Slash quite as much as you did, though I think I'm glad that the Slash points were Simms and not Jacobi - though I am sure you've already dreamed of Tennant / Jacobi at some point. I read somewhere online that there has always been a certain level of slashy tension between the Master and the Doctor, I think RTD deliberately played with that the same way he played with the internet jokes about Dalek's and Stairs in Season 1 Dalek.

What can I say, I like slash of all kinds, or most kinds of non-squicky relationships with a lot of chemistry in them, be they platonic or romantic or other. It all depends on the characters involved. I can see Nine/Rose, but not Ten/Rose. I can see Doctor/Master and Doctor/Jack never Doctor/Amy, except in a Best Friends way; for me it's Amy/Rory all the way. Oddly, I'm undecided about Doctor/River. I can see Smith!Doctor/Joan, but I don't think Doctor/Joan would work. Shakespeare/Doctor is a fun cracky pairing that has little to no basis, but tickles me pink.
Oh no! I wouldn't dream of Ten/Yana. No. Yana's such a kindly father-figure I don't want him in any role but the sweet, adorable professor that he is/was. For me, there are some people, or types of people, who remain fundamentally unshippable for various reasons. Yana works so perfectly, and his personality is just darling, so that shipping him with anyone could potentially 'ruin' his character because I honestly don't believe it would work. Eleven is borderline for this.

Of course, after this seeing this episode I have a tendency to walk around tapping out "duh duh duh duh *rest* duh duh duh duh *rest duh duh duh duh" Its far too catchy. I can hear the drums, the drums, the never ending drumbeat... closer than ever before.

Those drums are very catchy. I've got myself doing it once or twice today already.

Oooh yes, Simms is an awesome Master, I don't think you could deny that. Though, I didn't get such strong slash vibes I guess they were kind of there but... he, if you enjoy it, declare canon whatever you want

Problem is, I'm an English student, so I'm trained to read into subtext; and one of my . . . specialities I suppose is sexuality and gender (especially incest oddly enough) so I pick things like that up easily.
Plus at heart, I'm nothing but your average teenaged fangirl rampantly shipping anyone with a penis together regardless. Except of course I don't. I'm a woman of wealth and taste.
Sometimes.

Hu? Tachikoma- and Kamina-basketballs? Great now, I need to go and check if I hear that, too... Though, I'd not want to think of those next time I watch TTGL... *shudder*

Well, no time to go into more detail but great review nonetheless. Though now I'm really curious about your reaction to... Last of the Timelords...
But yeah, beware the truth about the Tochlafane... *gulp*

Haven't seen either of the two shows in about a year, but I heard those voice and immediately I heard "Tachikoma-desu," and Kamina doing some hot-blooded bellowing of some sort.
I don't know how accurate it is, but that's what I instantly thought.

@ CKG
Don't worry I'm not gonna spoil anything...

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Damn it the Drums are in my head now... it took ages to get them out last time!


Oh and with this being RTD I wouldn't be surprised if Doctor/Master was canon

I bet money your "slash-o-meter" explodes before the end of LotTL

Also, I really should dig out my box-sets & re-watch the Tennant era.

Hehe. I shall infect you all with the drums, and then I shall summon the Toclafane to decimated the world mwuhahahahahahaha!
Ah.
Um.
Ignore that. It means nothing. Nothing at all. No secret plans to regenerate as a female human disguised by another Chameleon Arch, only to reawaken and carry out a 'ficitonal' plan to conquer to world. Nope.
About RTD, why do you say that? Is he a known shipper of them (well, now I know he is) or something?
And now you've mentioned the possibility of an exploding slash-o-meter, you only make me want to see the final episode even more. Because childish giggling over reading too much into flirty actions is always amusing!

[Thufir]

'The Sound of Drums' Part 2/3 (Season Three, Episode Twelve)
Same format as before.

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That spacehopper of a time travel machine has impressive aim.

Nah, that's the Doctor. He said so.
Not sure if that's supposed to mean something about how he restarted the vortex manipulator made it more accurate or that as a Time Lord he was somehow able to steer them accurately, but either way.

But getting back on track, Cpt. Jack agrees with me on their preposterous amount of luck getting to the right time when the Doctor responds with the impossibly snippy, "That wasn't luck, that was me."

Oh, right, you weren't up to that bit.

"You see, I'm not making myself clear. Funny is like this" :D "Not funny is like this" >:(. "And right now I'm not like" :D "I'm like" >:(

That sequence has resulted in some rather amusing internet images.

But we cut back to No. Ten where Lady With A Bob is talking with Tish

... Oh! Ten Downing Street, not Tenth Doctor. That was confusing for a moment.

And the Master shot down the Sycorax!

No he didn't, he shot down the Racnoss. Torchwood shot down the Sycorax. Two completely different Christmas specials.

D: "I've been alone ever since. But not any more. Don't you see, all we've got each other."
M: "Are you asking me out on a date?!" [While this is probably sarcastic, people these two have so much sexual tension between them at this point in this scene alone (remember, I've not really seen Classic Who in any detail ever) that you could only cut it with a chainsaw. I freakin' squeaked at that line. And Hell, then I remember how the Doctor felt and acted about Prof. Yana.]

Yeah, I didn't really feel much slashy tension until these two lines. Just two old friends/enemies catching up, and the Master being creepy.
But yes, you're right about all this.

D: "You could stop this right now, we could leave this planet. We can fight across the constellations if that's what you want, but not on earth." [ . . . Words people. They fail me. The Doctor literally just asked the Master to run away together with him.]

Fixed that for you, sorry to disappoint. While the tension remains, that is still in line with their roles as arch-nemeses.

Martha snidely says, "Thought you were going to say he was your secret brother or something," but I think incest would be a little to avant-garde for the Beeb.
D: "You've been watching too much TV." Eastenders probably.

Apparently there was possibly an intention for the Doctor and the Master to be brothers way back in the days of Five - there was even a line from the Master: "Would you show no more mercy to your own-" *cut off by whatever it was that was killing him on that occasion* But it was never outright stated, of course, so they acknowledged the idea here and just made it a joke.

Newspaper lady was a Torchwood agent apparently.

Nah, she just knew about them. Which raises the question of how, but she's not actually part of Torchwood.

I guess they moved locations though if the President is in control of them now. I was under the impression it was a British thing. What with the leader being called the Brigadier and all.

No - UNIT. United Ntions Intelligence Taskforce. United Nations includes America and Britain, and many many others.

'Save' him.

*snrk* *snigger* I know where you're going with this.
That said, keep Dominic Deegan out of my Doctor Who.

M: "Oh, how to shut him up?" [I can think of a few ways]

"So it begins at last. That the human race fell, and was no more. And I looked down upon my new dominion as master of all, and I thought it good." sounds like a reference to the bible: "And God said, "Let there be light"; and there was light. And God saw that the light was good."

Yeah, pretty sure that's the reference.

Being male I don't think I enjoyed the Slash quite as much as you did,

I object to the implication that men can't enjoy slash.
OK, maybe not to the implication that they don't enjoy it as much as fangirls.

EDIT:

Martha's grown on me too in recent episodes, my ability to find her stupid faces asides, and she definitely is acting more mature than Rose did over their respective crushes and general situations. She is pretty interesting, and seems to be growing as a person. Then again, she was pretty darn amazing in 'Smith and Jones' before they started writing in another 'Doctor's Companion crushes on him' scenario.

I think a lot of people felt that Martha would have been a brilliant character if they hadn't stuck her with the unrequited Doctor-crush. She was betrayed by the writers!

You never do forget your first Doctor.

Actually, I don't remember Paul McGann very clearly.

[Drolyt]

Is there any reason you call me that?

He/she's probably adding a ty in the middle of your name. It is kind of an easy mistake to make, our brains are hardwired to recognize patterns, and thus read entire words rather than letters (this speeds up reading considerably). What exactly is a Curly Kit Girl anyways? Or I guess, what is a kit?

[Eldan]

Virtually anything can be a Biblical reference or sound Biblical in nature.

True, but at least in my translation, it actually says "And God looked down and thought it good".

[Thufir]

Oh, rewatching Utopia, just remembered something regarding the existence of the futurekind - since they were supposedly what humankind might become, I initially thought the sound of drums in Professor Yana's head could be an indication of that happening to him, which distracted me from the possibility that he was a Time Lord.

[SuperPanda]

Is there any reason you call me that?

He/she's probably adding a ty in the middle of your name. It is kind of an easy mistake to make, our brains are hardwired to recognize patterns, and thus read entire words rather than letters (this speeds up reading considerably)

He and, Drolyt is spot on. Add to that borderline Dyslexia (not enough to actually count just enough to make it hard to remember certain numbers and to easily confuse and therefore transpose certain letter groups.

Somehow my brain had imprinted you as Cute-Kitty-Girl after your crush on the Irish cat man.

I object to the implication that men can't enjoy slash.
OK, maybe not to the implication that they don't enjoy it as much as fangirls.

You know, I'm usually all for gender/race/orientation equality... so yeah, shame on me.

I mean, I love Captain Jack Harkness because he has such a liberal dance card.

That said, my personal preferences don't include either John Simms or David Tennant (Though I will admit to completely understanding how both of them are very appealing). The Master works great with suggested tension between him and the Doctor, but anything further I think would ruin it. So for me the suggested slash and tangible tension is wonderful because it makes a very fun (and funny) dynamic.

[CurlyKitGirl]

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Nah, that's the Doctor. He said so.
Not sure if that's supposed to mean something about how he restarted the vortex manipulator made it more accurate or that as a Time Lord he was somehow able to steer them accurately, but either way.

[...]

Oh, right, you weren't up to that bit.

Like I said, five seconds in and I was confused. If I'd waited about seven more seconds I wouldn't have been.

That sequence has resulted in some rather amusing internet images.

I can imagine the Master emoticons that sprang up after this.

... Oh! Ten Downing Street, not Tenth Doctor. That was confusing for a moment.

I did say No. Ten. But seeing as I freely swtich between the Doctor, Ten and Tennant I can see the confusion.

No he didn't, he shot down the Racnoss. Torchwood shot down the Sycorax. Two completely different Christmas specials.

Racnoss, Sycorax, same thing. They both invaded at Christmas time, plus I got a little sidetracked by the mention of Harriet Jones (former Prine Minister of Great Britain) in the same breath.

Yeah, I didn't really feel much slashy tension until these two lines. Just two old friends/enemies catching up, and the Master being creepy.
But yes, you're right about all this.

Slash Goggles. I spent most of A Level English Lit wearing them with the rest of the class. Freud. Always good for a laugh.
Although in that case it was more Incest Goggles, Sex Goggles and Faux-Erotic Goggles. Aaaand a little bit of the Slash Goggles. Also Adultery Goggles. That last case was also a rare case of the heterosexual Goggles being worn as well.

Fixed that for you, sorry to disappoint. While the tension remains, that is still in line with their roles as arch-nemeses.

You sure? Because I listened to that line about half a dozen times over and it always sounded like 'fly' to me. Makes more sense than mine anyway.

Apparently there was possibly an intention for the Doctor and the Master to be brothers way back in the days of Five - there was even a line from the Master: "Would you show no more mercy to your own-" *cut off by whatever it was that was killing him on that occasion* But it was never outright stated, of course, so they acknowledged the idea here and just made it a joke.

So we get a quite creepy in-joke coming hot on the coattails of a slashtastic conversation making a semi-incestuous punchline.
Wow.
The Beeb got racy didn't it.

Nah, she just knew about them. Which raises the question of how, but she's not actually part of Torchwood.

A planter agent? You know, someone who does all the cover ups, leaks false stories etc.

*snrk* *snigger* I know where you're going with this.
That said, keep Dominic Deegan out of my Doctor Who.

It's my Who, and I'll mix it with whatever I please! Even if I did feel bad about making a joke about 'saving' people. I normally try to mix better things with my Who though.

Gutters. My mind seldom rises above them

Yeah, pretty sure that's the reference.

I've worked off so many Bibles recently I don't always get all the obvious things.

I object to the implication that men can't enjoy slash.
OK, maybe not to the implication that they don't enjoy it as much as fangirls.

Oh, no one can truly enjoy slash as much as a rabid fangirl. I just dabble for fun.
Me, I'm all for gender etc. equality when it turns to same-sex shipping; wish I had male friends who were comfortable about discussing it.
Oh wait.
I do.
They're called English/literature in general students.

I think a lot of people felt that Martha would have been a brilliant character if they hadn't stuck her with the unrequited Doctor-crush. She was betrayed by the writers!

I'll blame RTD then. He's meant to be a sort of Overseer of Scripts and Plot Elements for this period right?

Actually, I don't remember Paul McGann very clearly.

In all fairness, he was barely a minute minute Doctor.

He and, Drolyt is spot on. Add to that borderline Dyslexia (not enough to actually count just enough to make it hard to remember certain numbers and to easily confuse and therefore transpose certain letter groups.

Somehow my brain had imprinted you as Cute-Kitty-Girl after your crush on the Irish cat man.

Brannigan was amazing! He's still one of my favourite one-episode characters.
I see how you managed to go for Cute-Kitty-Girl.
And seeing as I have a catgirl avvie (or three) I might as well go change, been thinking of doing that for a while anyway.
Back on track though, it was just a bit odd for me as I'm almost universally called Curly/Koorly/variations thereon. Plus I happen to have known two or three Kitty's in real life.
I'm not objecting to it, I'm fine with it, just more than a bit unusual for me.

You know, I'm usually all for gender/race/orientation equality... so yeah, shame on me.

I mean, I love Captain Jack Harkness because he has such a liberal dance card.

It was just a remark made after the rampant pages of writing I spent giggling over sexual tension. Commenting on the fact that you personally as a dude didn't find slash as appealing as a fangirl did in this occasion isn't all that shameful.
By the way, everyone loves Cpt. jack Harkness regardless of everything. He's just that charismatic. He's like Ace Rimmer, but omnisexual! Or like Lord Flasheart! But less of a jerk.

That said, my personal preferences don't include either John Simms or David Tennant (Though I will admit to completely understanding how both of them are very appealing). The Master works great with suggested tension between him and the Doctor, but anything further I think would ruin it. So for me the suggested slash and tangible tension is wonderful because it makes a very fun (and funny) dynamic.

It's the main reason I enjoyed this episode. Fun, squeakable moments and a great dynamic.
Can't say I'd want canonisation of the Doctor/Master pairing though, I've only had one proper episode to base it off, and with characters who have such a complex history as these two I'd want to hold off at least quarter of the next episode before declaring this ship made written in the canon one hundred percent obviously.
Then again, sly happy suggestions from readers hint the slash is only going to be upped for the next episode so . . .
I bet you a penny making a Slashy Drinking Game would be fun though.

[Dienekes]

Here's the difference between you and me Curly, I watched through that entire episode and didn't once think of anything slashy.

Hell, even the "Are you asking me on a date?" line sounded to me more like the Master was mocking the Doctors wussy sounding (to him) plan to resolve the situation.

But as always, fun to read your interpretation.

Also a question to the older Dr Who fans. I've only seen a couple of old Who episodes and I was wondering if the Master's drumming was an old character trait or was it invented for the new series. The one episode of the Master I saw of the old show didn't mention it.

[Tiki Snakes]

Here's the difference between you and me Curly, I watched through that entire episode and didn't once think of anything slashy.

Hell, even the "Are you asking me on a date?" line sounded to me more like the Master was mocking the Doctors wussy sounding (to him) plan to resolve the situation.

But as always, fun to read your interpretation.

Also a question to the older Dr Who fans. I've only seen a couple of old Who episodes and I was wondering if the Master's drumming was an old character trait or was it invented for the new series. The one episode of the Master I saw of the old show didn't mention it.

I haven't seen any episodes with old-master in, but i'm pretty sure it's a RTD era thing. Given stuff that Curly has yet to get to, though, I think it makes sense.

How much of Nu-Who have you seen, Dienekes? Wouldn't want to spoil anything for you with my explanation.

[Dienekes]

I haven't seen any episodes with old-master in, but i'm pretty sure it's a RTD era thing. Given stuff that Curly has yet to get to, though, I think it makes sense.

How much of Nu-Who have you seen, Dienekes? Wouldn't want to spoil anything for you with my explanation.

Oh I'm up to date. I was just curious if RTD further developed a pre-existing character trait or wiped it all up himself.

[Tiki Snakes]

Oh I'm up to date. I was just curious if RTD further developed a pre-existing character trait or wiped it all up himself.

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In which case, given that the drums are a signal sent from inside the time-war's stable loop, they almost have to be a RTD era device. They are, to the best of my knowledge a purely Nu-Who phenominon and one that I've heard some Old-Who fans being split on.
I enjoy the timey-whimey explanation for it all, and the fact that he's always heard the drums, but hadn't always heard the drums until the time-war. It's the kind of cross-time fallout I'd expect from such a war.

It's a great motif, I think, too.

[Nameless Ghost]

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The drums are indeed a nu-Who thing, invented by RTD as a way to make the Master seem more crazy (I believe that was his explanation, I can go look it the exact quote if anyone's really curious).

[comicshorse]

Also a question to the older Dr Who fans. I've only seen a couple of old Who episodes and I was wondering if the Master's drumming was an old character trait or was it invented for the new series. The one episode of the Master I saw of the old show didn't mention it.

Its never mentioned in OldWho, though the Master and Doctor being childhood friends was.
It was a nice touch the Master in OldWho never really seemed to have an overall goal apart from being evil so a purpose to his actions is a good character development

[Thufir]

You sure? Because I listened to that line about half a dozen times over and it always sounded like 'fly' to me. Makes more sense than mine anyway.

Just rewatched the episode, I'm certain it's 'fight'.

I'll blame RTD then. He's meant to be a sort of Overseer of Scripts and Plot Elements for this period right?

Yeah, that's right.

Here's the difference between you and me Curly, I watched through that entire episode and didn't once think of anything slashy.

Hell, even the "Are you asking me on a date?" line sounded to me more like the Master was mocking the Doctors wussy sounding (to him) plan to resolve the situation.

Seriously?
I mean, mocking, yes. But more mocking the fact it really kinda did sound like the Doctor was asking him out on a date, or something along those lines.

[Dienekes]

Seriously?
I mean, mocking, yes. But more mocking the fact it really kinda did sound like the Doctor was asking him out on a date, or something along those lines.

Well admittedly, relationship stuff tends to fly right past over my head unless it's blatantly obvious to the point of being annoying (ex. Martha has a crush on the Doctor).

Also thanks to Tiki, Nameless, and comics for answering my question.

[Aron Times]

To Curly Slashy Kitty Girl:

The fob watch says this to Yana:

"The drums! The drums! The drums! The neverending drumbeat! Open me, you human fool! Open the light and summon me and receive my majesty!"

I have this as my signature on TeamLiquid.net. It also helps that I watched the episode with subtitles, as do all other shows on TV, as my mother has hearing problems and needs subtitles to understand most stuff.

[Dr. Simon]

Actually thats a question I've been meaning to ask:
What are some of the best old Who serials? I'm really interested in watching some of them but don't have time to wade through decades of episodes, so far I've watched the City of Death and Genesis of the Daleks, both of which I really enjoyed. Anyone have recommendations of others to look up?

Digging back in the thread a bit for this, but:

If I had to pick one story per Doctor, I think I'd go for -

First - Daleks Invasion of Earth - features some great location footage of a deserted London, plus one of my favourite Who scenes where Barbara takes on a Dalek roadblock in a truck! I also like The Web Planet, but that makes me wierd.

Second - There aren't many fully intact 2nd Dr. serials. I like The War Games, right at the end of the era. It's long (10 episodes) but breaks down into several subsections, builds up tension nicely and introduces a lot of Time Lord lore - some of it resurfacing in The Doctor's Wife. Power of the Daleks (at the other end of Troughton's era) is also good, but sadly mostly in reconstructed form. Echoes of it can be seen in Victory of the Daleks - "Would you like some liquid for your guests?" Web of Fear introduces one Colonel Lethbridge-Stewart...

Third - Frontier in Space. Has some nice material for Jo, has a fairly convincing Space Opera-y plot that sprawls all over the place, and the end is the beginning (although the follow-up is disappointing). And for a Pertwee one, there's not too much running back and forth. Spearhead from Space and The Sea Devils are fun, typical 3rd Dr. romps. The oft-cited Green Death and The Daemons are, IMO, weaker.

Fourth - I'd say Genesis of the Daleks, but you've already seen that. And City of Death. Hmm... I found the oft-cited Pyramids of Mars and Brain of Morbius to be a bit of a let-down. Talons of Weng Chiang is fun, Horror on Fang Rock is intense. I like Robots of Death, if only for an unexpectedly good effects shot. All have some good moments for Leela.

I can't fully recommend further as I'm still working my way through the 5th. Kinda is an intriguing and different story, I think I'd pick that one. The Visitation is fun. If you like Kinda you'll like the sequel, Snakedance. Enlightenment is entertaining stuff, and Frontios remniscent of earlier Dr. stories.

[comicshorse]

To carry on in Dr Simon's noble tradition

Fifth- Caves of Androzani is IMHO his best story and highly recommended but I'd also recommend Earthshock as a good story with a contraversial ending

Sixth- Sadly not much good stuff to pick from here. Colin Baker was not well served by the writers and had the worst companion in Who history. I'd probably go for The Trial of a Timelord, if only for its ambition

Seventh- Is a favourite of mine and while I'd recommend the Curse of Fenric, Silver Nemesis, GhostLight and Survival his best is Remberance of the Daleks (Seven also got some of the worst ever stories, in the name of all thats holy avoid The Happiness Patrol and Paradise Towers)

Eight- Only had the movie

And then we're into NuWho

[The Big Dice]

when it comes to Classic Who, there's a lot of choice. 2Entertain have almost finished issuing hte complete serials by now. and that's a huge back catalog.

The Web Planet is an intriguing 1st Doctor story. There's no human supporting characters and there's a wonderfully trippy atmosphere to the whole thing. and it got a couple of sly mentions in New Who. See if you can spot them.

The few 2nd Doctor stroies that survive are a bit of a mixed bag. My personal favourite is Tomb of the Cybermen. though Seeds of Death, The Invasion and The War Games are all very good.

The 70s was when Classic Who was at it's height, both in terms of ratings and creativity. And the sheer quantity of great stories from this time is a testament to that. The 3rd Doctor had a conistently high quality run, but I'd say that The Silurians, Inferno, The Three Doctors, PLlnet of the Daleks, The Time Warrior and Planet of the Spiders are all worth checking out.

The Fourth Doctor saw some of the best stories, and some truly awful ones as well. And was when the show got it's name for having wobbly sets and low production values. But there are a couple of simple criteria to look out for when picking a Tom Baker story to watch. First, was it written by Terrance ***** or Rober Holmes? If the answer is yes, it's worth watching. The same is true if the producer was Phillip Hinchcliffe.

With the 5th Doctor comes a drop in the quality of writing. Ressurection of the Daleks is entertaining, and so is Earthshock. But don't look too closely or you'll see that they went for action over ploot in both cases. Caves of Androzani is a masterpiece, but then it was written by Robert Holmes.

This brings us to the wilderness years of 1984-87. attack of the Cybermen and Revelation of the Daleks are possibly the best stories of the 6th Doctor. And they aren't that great in my opinion. But issues between lead actor, producer and script editor combined with the head of the BBC hating the show all came together to make for a bad few years.

The 7th Doctor was actually starting to show potential when the show wasn't renewed. There was a script editor who was excited about taking the show in a new direction, darker and with a more manipulative doctor. And that would have been interesting to see play out. Remembrance of the Daleks, Ghost Light and The Curse of Fenric are all better than I thought they were on broadcast.

Sadly, we never got to see the Cartmel Masterplan come to life. But then, there was some silly stuff in there, so maybe that's for the best.

[Cog]

After a recent rewatch of both River Song's introductory episodes and the recent finale, I've had a bit of an Epileptic Trees moment. There's nothing past the finale in here, and I don't discuss anything too directly, but for politeness's sake...

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Something just clicked when I saw Kovarian again; there's something in her manner of speech that reminds me very strongly of River. Granted, I'm American; I might just be picking up on a shared regional accent that I wouldn't be familiar with (though there seems to be a good distance between the two actresses' birthplaces). Her hair color's different, but it's got the same wavy/curliness to it (which is apparently not normal for Frances Barber). So, let's see what branches this tree might have:

• Kovarian is the same River we know, reconstituted after her little... excursion in The Library. (Doubtful; just here for completeness)
• Kovarian is some sort of paradox/timey-wimey shenanigans duplicate of River.
• Kovarian is simply a clone of River. (Also doubtful, it's too simple.)
• Either Kovarian or River is a stabilized Flesh duplicate; the Doctor was able to devise the technology easily, so others might have as well.
• (Other?)

This could fit in with some of what we know. River is supposed to be the weapon against the Doctor, after all, and we've been wondering why she wasn't familiar with the scene on the beach from the opener. Maybe it's because it wasn't the River we know, but instead Kovarian-River, in that suit? Kovarian says she knows the child "will" be a weapon, and that might not just be bluster, since she's been very much in control so far. She knows the child will be a weapon, because she remembers the scene on the beach, and now all she's doing is completing the far end of her personal time loop.

[Mauve Shirt]

After a recent rewatch of both River Song's introductory episodes and the recent finale, I've had a bit of an Epileptic Trees moment. There's nothing past the finale in here, and I don't discuss anything too directly, but for politeness's sake...

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Something just clicked when I saw Kovarian again; there's something in her manner of speech that reminds me very strongly of River. Granted, I'm American; I might just be picking up on a shared regional accent that I wouldn't be familiar with (though there seems to be a good distance between the two actresses' birthplaces). Her hair color's different, but it's got the same wavy/curliness to it (which is apparently not normal for Frances Barber). So, let's see what branches this tree might have:

• Kovarian is the same River we know, reconstituted after her little... excursion in The Library. (Doubtful; just here for completeness)
• Kovarian is some sort of paradox/timey-wimey shenanigans duplicate of River.
• Kovarian is simply a clone of River. (Also doubtful, it's too simple.)
• Either Kovarian or River is a stabilized Flesh duplicate; the Doctor was able to devise the technology easily, so others might have as well.
• (Other?)

This could fit in with some of what we know. River is supposed to be the weapon against the Doctor, after all, and we've been wondering why she wasn't familiar with the scene on the beach from the opener. Maybe it's because it wasn't the River we know, but instead Kovarian-River, in that suit? Kovarian says she knows the child "will" be a weapon, and that might not just be bluster, since she's been very much in control so far. She knows the child will be a weapon, because she remembers the scene on the beach, and now all she's doing is completing the far end of her personal time loop.

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I thought that during the finale, too, that Kovarian was similar to River somehow. Hm.