Metal Thread VII: The Mosh Pit Don't Start 'Til We Walk In

[DJ Yung Crunk]

When did making fun of Darkthrone become a thing? I understand making fun of, say, Burzum but Darkthrone? What's that about? Is it the album covers? Yeah, they're pretty silly but is that justification?

[Faulty]

Making fun of either Darkthrone or Burzum is a black metal sin.

[DJ Yung Crunk]

Making fun of either Darkthrone or Burzum is a black metal sin.

Have you heard Burzum's latest album?

EDIT: And Darkthrone haven't been black metal in 10 years.

[Faulty]

Have you heard Burzum's latest album?

EDIT: And Darkthrone haven't been black metal in 10 years.

Umpskitar isn't that bad, and anyone who could produce Hvis Lysat Tar Oss and Filosofem deserves respect regardless. Darkthrone were still black metal 10 years ago. I'd say it's been more like 6 or 7 (The Cult is Alive) but even now they're still suitably blackened and their music is still good. Not to mention, again, that their old material is God (Satan?) tier BM.

[Moff Chumley]

Making fun of either Darkthrone or Burzum is a black metal sin.

Because it's too easy?

[Faulty]

Because it's too easy?

We all know how untrve you are Chums. It's not your place to comment.

So I'm having trouble understanding why corpse paint doesn't phase me but I find aggrotech/dark electro fashion to be preposterous. Thoughts? Feelings?

[grimbold]

Because it's too easy?

chumley.... them be fighting words...

do you want to go there?


also, did you check out Venus Blue like i told you too?

[Nameless]

Umpskitar isn't that bad, and anyone who could produce Hvis Lysat Tar Oss and Filosofem deserves respect regardless. Darkthrone were still black metal 10 years ago. I'd say it's been more like 6 or 7 (The Cult is Alive) but even now they're still suitably blackened and their music is still good. Not to mention, again, that their old material is God (Satan?) tier BM.

Pfft, It doesn't matter how Black Metal your music sounds, you're not producing trve kvlt Black Metal unless your band has a name that no one really knows how to pronounce and consists of just one person (yourself) living and creating music in a cabin in a forest somewhere.
You're also not allowed to have a social life, and when you see a pile of twigs on the floor, you should be able to say, "Why, that pile of twigs over there looks exactly like my band's logo."

It's just a fact of life.

[Faulty]

Wait, what? I don't follow.

[grimbold]

Pfft, It doesn't matter how Black Metal your music sounds, you're not producing trve kvlt Black Metal unless your band has a name that no one really knows how to pronounce and consists of just one person (yourself) living and creating music in a cabin in a forest somewhere.
You're also not allowed to have a social life, and when you see a pile of twigs on the floor, you should be able to say, "Why, that pile of twigs over there looks exactly like my band's logo."

It's just a fact of life.

Nameless
you just made my day
and every other day
all of the days

nameless
will you be my black metal bro forever?

[WhamBamSam]

Wait, what? I don't follow.

The implication of the joke is that Darkthrone are less black metal because their name is in pronounceable English, they have multiple members who have never murdered one another, and their logo is more or less legible.

[Comrade]

The implication of the joke is that Darkthrone are less black metal because their name is in pronounceable English, they have multiple members who have never murdered one another, and their logo is more or less legible.

Poseurs.
Pronounceable English... how... ungrim? My black metal terminology needs some work.

[grimbold]

Poseurs.
Pronounceable English... how... ungrim? My black metal terminology needs some work.

i believe the term is unkvlt

[Nameless]

Nameless
you just made my day
and every other day
all of the days

nameless
will you be my black metal bro forever?

I thought I was already. D:

The implication of the joke is that Darkthrone are less black metal because their name is in pronounceable English, they have multiple members who have never murdered one another, and their logo is more or less legible.

I never said they had to murder anyone. Murdering people is what everyone expects you to do as a Black Metal musician. If you kill anyone, you'll be selling out.

[Killer Angel]

Pfft, It doesn't matter how Black Metal your music sounds, you're not producing trve kvlt Black Metal unless your band has a name that no one really knows how to pronounce and consists of just one person (yourself) living and creating music in a cabin in a forest somewhere.
You're also not allowed to have a social life, and when you see a pile of twigs on the floor, you should be able to say, "Why, that pile of twigs over there looks exactly like my band's logo."

And that logo must be, of course, unreadable.

[grimbold]

I thought I was already. D:

i figured it was time to make it official

I never said they had to murder anyone. Murdering people is what everyone expects you to do as a Black Metal musician. If you kill anyone, you'll be selling out.

yeah
its definitely official
just don't tell Zeratul or he'll be jelly :P

[Nameless]

And that logo must be, of course, unreadable.

OF COURSE!

i figured it was time to make it official


yeah
its definitely official
just don't tell Zeratul or he'll be jelly :P

Nah, it's fine. Zeratul is my Blackgaze/Shoegaze/Goth Rock/Industrial buddy. I'm sure he won't mind.

[grimbold]

oh yeah
so nameless, zeratul and i started a black metal project...

[godspit]

oh yeah
so nameless, zeratul and i started a black metal project...

Awesome! I wish you guys luck. What style are you guys going for?

Also got a bunch of black metal CD's over the holidays. Titles include:

Dictus te Necare by Bethlehem (really awesome)
Nocturnal Attack by Nocturnal Feelings (enjoyable)
Azrael Rising (Haven't listened yet, but looks promising)
Sacrilegious Impalement by Sacrilegious Impalement (really awesome)
Throne of the Depths by Drautran (Technically okay, but not a fan)
Between Ice and fire/Illucescit Mortis Jesu by The Frost and Black Fire (The Frost is meh, but Black Fire is pretty good)
Ku Chwale Mrocznych Conow I (Polish, man) by Cthulhu Rises (Listening to it now, pretty intense)
Prophecy of Doom by Hic Iacet (Pretty good)
EP by Acatalepsy (Decent Scottish death metal)

[Makensha]

oh yeah
so nameless, zeratul and i started a black metal project...

Any more than 32 kbit/s and I will be disappointed.

[grimbold]

Awesome! I wish you guys luck. What style are you guys going for?

kind of a mix
the two things i have right now are basically depressive black metal with a few doom and blackgaze elements
we would like to add more blackgaze though

if you're interested PM me and i can send you crappy MIDI files of the songs :P

[Feytalist]

Also got a bunch of black metal CD's over the holidays. Titles include:

I think this is the point where I mention Amestigon again. Check it out. Seriously.

[grimbold]

oh so guys guess who i get to interview?

Spoiler

Show

GENE FRIGGIN HOGLAN

[Killer Angel]

oh so guys guess who i get to interview?

That's... awesome.
But since envy is not metal, I will not hate you.

[grimbold]

thank you Mr. Angel

unrelated
just did 11 concerts in 2 days
i am broken

[Science Officer]

unrelated
just did 11 concerts in 2 days
i am broken

?how?

Also, new Sabbath album announced.
'13', out June 2013

[Leon]

Just saw Sabaton and Nightwish live in Melbourne. It was Awesome, 2 of my favorite bands for one price

[grimbold]

?how?

Also, new Sabbath album announced.
'13', out June 2013

festivals man.. crazy stuff...

also
is it just me who is REALLY scared about the new sabbath?

[godspit]

I am too Grimbold. I am too.

[DJ Yung Crunk]

New Black Sabbath? Oh it's going to be dreadful, guys. Sure, older artists releasing new music isn't quite as much of a doomed prospect as it used to be (Public Image Limited, Killing Joke, Swans, Neil Young & Crazy Horse) but it's Sabbath. They really don't have the best of luck with "reinventions".

In other news I am making an effort to like genres I formerly didn't and, thusfar, it's proving to be a smashing success. I now "get" pop punk and J-Pop. Now we move on to the real challenge; power metal. Actually I'm overstating how difficult it'll be, I already like Helloween and Iced Earth so I've got a foot in the door. Will you gents help me out?