Apocalypse Calls [With Free Long Distance]

[Lord_Gareth]

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Weeeeee IC thread! If OOC is needed, stick it in a spoiler, but try to keep OOC on the OOC Thread. Put rolls - using INVISIBLE CASTLE ONLY - in spoilers at the bottom of your post.

"Yeah. Uh-huh. Mmkay, I got it. Look, I got it. 'Bye."


The punk-gothic beauty hangs up her cell phone and sighs. She opens it again, but it's not a phone anymore - instead, what folds out is a computer that suspends itself in the air, blatantly defying natural laws. She inputs a few commands, then walks away. When she comes back, she has a cup of coffee and the screen reads, "Operation Ready."

She smiles, "Protocol 8465623161710 'Deus Ex Machina'."

Her words carry far - all the way, in fact, to the furthest corners of the multiverse.

* * *

""Protocol 8465623161710 'Deus Ex Machina'."

You all hear those words, then find yourself in a massive redwood forest at sunset, in a crowd of confused and angry humanoids, angels, and demons. Bickering begins immediately, but the moment a blade is drawn, everything freezes - including you. Unable to move a muscle, you watch as a short girl in her late teens with hair like liquid night and stunning blue eyes simply appears in front of the crowd. She is beyond beautiful - she is human perfection in a gothic outfit, Aphrodite in all black.

"Jesus," she says patronizingly, "must you act so childish?"

She touches one of the demons that pulled a blade, and the beast disintegrates in a flash of light. There is a curiously hollow feeling, as though its very being were wiped away. You feel yourself let go.

"Gader Throkk?" she asks in a polite, buisiness-like tone. Her voice is rich and musical, but not supernaturally so - more like an accomplished vocalist.

A tentacled being makes a sound in response to her question that she apparantly understands, because she replies, "Thank you," before wiping that being from existence as well.

"Now that I've taken care of those two, I should probably tell ya'll why you're here. Sit down - have a Coke."

Everyone finds themselves in lawn chairs with a freshly-opened can of some dark, fizzy substance.

"You can call me Kaylee, and this is the Nexus. Here, your gods are nothing. Here, your power is nothing. Here, I make the rules for everything, down to the tiniest molecular motion. And I've brought you all here for the simple and laughable purpose of saving whatever passes for existence in our Megaverse."

One by one, people start dissapearing, until only you five are left. Kaylee frowns and checks a list that appears from nowhere.

"Huh. You're on the list, but there's no information on you. Who are you people?"

[GimliFett]

Arak "Boomer" Torunn

Standing close to four and a half feet, a thick-bodied man steps forward and withdraws a black, wide-brimmed hat from atop his head. His dark brown eyes 'neath auburn brows take in the others left in the clearing with him as he casually strokes his thick goatee. The skin of his face has many scars criss-crossing it; angry red welts and puckered white lines. "Ah'm Arak Torunn. Ya can call meh Boomer, tho'!" He grins, showing a couple of broken teeth on the left side of his mouth, before replacing the hat atop his head.

Boomer wears leather armor dotted with metallic studs at uneven intervals. In his right hand he carries a long tube-like device with a wide-mouth at one end and a handle and trigger mechanism at the other. Another strange-handled object buts up from a scabbard on his right hip while a club and sickle ride the other side of his belt, next to a bulging belt pouch. A travel pack bulges beneath a heavy woolen cloak and a capped beast-horn hangs down to his hip.

"Sooooo...why're we heere?" he drawls.

[Cogwheel]

The construct's mind was reeling with questions. Why had he been 'chosen' by this human? Could he trust her? What, beyond the little that he had been told, was this place? What could it be that would threaten the 'Megaverse', as she put it? What was 'Deus Ex Machina'? Could a group like this possibly stop it?

In the dark glass corridors of his mind, Mirror thought, and he did not relish the answers which he brought to himself. Finally, he looked the human in the eyes and spoke.

"Most know me as Mirror, but call me what you will - names make little difference to me. I am.. Well, we clearly have little time, so I will be brief - the simplest, shortest way to describe me would be as a weapon. I was created some time ago to fight a war that has already ended. I thought myself free... but it seems such hopes are short-lived indeed. Now.. it seems, my lady, that I find myself entirely at your mercy, and so I must ask two things - what is this threat you speak of, and what exactly do you demand of us?"

Mirror eyes the can of dark, fizzing substance suspiciously before adding, "Though such attempts are futile against me, I suggest you desist in trying to poison my new companions."

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hm, let's see... Bel-Shorath is practically a figment of this guy's imagination. Is it here or gone anyway?

[Inspectre]

Quint

Quint had watched with amusement as the demons and angels immediately fell to bickering. Although most of them could probably snuff him out with barely a thought in his human shell, once he had been far above all of them. And as a god, that was how it should be, and still was in some respects even now with his human form.

For despite all their power and intelligence, every single one of them was bound to a code of conduct which they followed almost mindlessly - yes, even the demons, despite their code of conduct being little more than "be contrary about everything!". As expected, one of the demons was stupid enough to draw a weapon, and was thankfully punished for it shortly thereafter by being wiped out of existence. Stupidity as pathogenic as that should be wiped out, and Quint found himself starting to like this strange goddess that called herself Kaylee.

Of course, her beauty helped with that - too many of the goddesses back on Narzen liked to appear homely or untouchable ice queens. She was probably reading his mind right now or some such - no matter, if she was offended so easily that was her problem Quint thought with a smile.

After dealing with the trouble makers, Kaylee proceeds to explain what they were all doing here and where exactly they were now. She also offered them some sort of strange beverage that came in a metal jar instead of a glass bottle: which was fascinating in and of itself. Quint loved mixing up strange concoctions as a god, so this one little remainder of home was oddly comforting to him.

Not so for the mechanical man nearby, also apparently a newcomer to this Nexus place. Sadly typical, his mind seemed to be ruled by the straightjacket of logic rather than emotion and flexible thought.

Hmmm, weren't there a whole lot more beings here a few moments ago? No matter, five of them plus Kaylee was probably enough to start this little get-together.

"So you're saying Kaylee brought us all this way from where we were, can apparently wipe beings out of existence with a thought, and supposedly has brought us here to deal with some threat to the entire Multiverse, and what she really wants to do is poison us with strange drinks." Quint said, his tone just shy of mocking as he picked up his metal jar, tipping it in a toast to their host.

"If this really is poison, I hope it at least does something interesting to kill me." Quint then knocks back a sip of the drink, making various faces as he rolls the bubbling liquid over his tongue.

"Hmmm, not bad. A little sweet for my tastes though, and lacks bite. I don't suppose you have some ale or whiskey to mix in with it?" Quint asked, turning the metal jar over in his hands, debating whether or not to continue drinking its contents in their current state. Eventually, he sets the can aside and looks back up, making a grand sweeping gesture with his left hand.

"Ah yes, I forgot to introduce myself! My humble apologies. Most know me as Quint." For a moment he pauses, debating whether or not to reveal more. His life as a human so far had taught him a bit of caution in who he revealed his past history too, but these were certainly extraordinary circumstances. And perhaps this, and only this, was his one chance to reclaim what he had lost.

"But my real name is Quinterazael, and I was once a god on a boring little plane called Narzen. Now I'm just a human, but I would love to return to my former place of power in my old home. Help me with that and I'll gladly save whatever multiverses you desire."

[Lord_Gareth]

Kaylee regards Mirror curiously, cocking her head as though to get a better view.

"Hmm...Frankenstien-Class living construct, metallic life subspecies, and....class three fledgling god? I'll have to look into that later."

Quint hears a pouring sound and looks just in time to see the last of some vodka mix into his Coke.

"Now, Mr. Mirror here has asked some very good questions. First off, 'Deus Ex Machina' is from an ancient language spoken on Earth Tangent One, and translates to, 'The God in the Machine.' That's me. Hilariously enough, I'm not a god - I can die like any one of you. Good luck trying it here, though - for all intents and purposes, I'm omnescient in my home."

Something beeps in her pocket and she holds up a hand to indicate that you should wait. She pulls a small device from her pocket, unfolds it, and puts it to her ear.

"Yeah? Charlie, honey, I love you and all, but I'm kinda saving existence. No, the kind that takes hours to finish. Yes, it's important. Wait, she did what? Look, I'll deal with this after I'm done. Love you. 'Bye."

"Ugh, I'm going to beat my daughter with a fish later. The second question - what could be threatening the Megaverse - has a slightly more complicated explanation."

A large piece of paper appears, floating next to her, and a fractal curve begins to draw itself on it.

"When you start small, you're stable. A rock, a plant, maybe an animal. You can sustain yourself. When you start getting bigger - a sentient, a group, a city, a nation, a world, a universe - you start becoming more and more unstable. You start falling apart. I'm the human element that keeps the Megaverse running - I change the numbers in the equation so it can never solve itself. But it's trying to solve itself now, and I assure you, it adds up to zero. You are needed to do a lot of dirty work for me, for the simple reason that I cannot leave this place - ever."

[TRM]

Claw

Claw had found himself staring at Kaylee as she disposed of the demons; now, as he hears her speak to her husband, he begins to blush deeply and swings his hair—hair that looks as if it is permanently stained with blood—over his face to hide it. He suddenly, unconsciously, pictures Katriana's face and his blush intensifies. With a little shudder, he studies the metal can intently; desperately looking for anything other than Kaylee to think about.

After studying the can, he takes a sip and peers through the curtain of ragged hair at the others in the clearing—carefully avoiding looking at Kaylee.

[Djinn_in_Tonic]

As Claw glances around, his eye catches someone who could not possibly be more different from the object of his embarrassment. Sitting cross-legged on a chair not ten feet away from him is a girl about Kaylee's age, but that is where all similarities end. The mistress of the Nexus is a Gothic beauty, black-haired and black-garbed; this girl is the perfect image of a high-school cheerleader. In fact, she still wears her cheerleading outfit--a rather provocative white and red affair, involving a shirt that exposes far to much of her chest and stomach and a pair of shorts almost to short to qualify as clothing at all. The overall effect merely emphasizes her stunning physique; an action that should be illegal in at least three states.

The beauty tosses her head, shaking her long blond locks, and speaks, her voice like the chiming of small, tinkling bells.

"So you, like, pulled me away from the last quarter of the big game to tell us you want us to do your work for you? That is so not cool."

[Lord_Gareth]

Kaylee gives Nicole a withering glare, then pauses thoughtfully. In a moment, she rolls her eyes.

"Of course. You're one of Charlie's, like me and Tyler. Ty's got Equilibrium, I'm brilliant...what do you do, the Macerena?"

[Djinn_in_Tonic]

"No way! That dance is, like, totally out of fashion."

With that, Nicole runs a hand through her golden hair, loosening a hair decoration shaped like a purple flower. She gently tosses it up, and, as it lazily begins its descent, she leaps gracefully upwards, one hand rising to catch the small ornament.

Only it is no longer an ornament.

Five delicate fingers close around a wrapped handle, and cold steel shines in the evening sun. Nicole Emily Seeming pirouettes in the air, and the whisper of rushing air follows her as a great blade cleaves through the sky. It is easily seven feet long and built like a cleaver, but she wields it as if it weighed nothing. Within the blink of an eye Nicole alights on the ground, the massive weapon held jauntily over one shoulder.

"I do this."

[GimliFett]

Arak "Boomer" Torunn

"Well, sheeee-it!" The dwarf spits through the gap of his broken teeth. "Don't Ah feel a bit outta mah class? All's Ah do is make thin's go BOOM!" he bellows the last word, then settles into a semi-mad cackling.

[TRM]

Claw

Claw watches Nicole's exhibition impassively. Impressive, but why would she want to hide her power behind such an... idiotic facade? He reaches back and feels the wrapped handle of his own Biter, but doesn't draw it.

Kaylee had opened up more questions, and Claw finds himself asking one aloud. "Who the Hell is Charlie?"
But he isn't paying attention, he hardly realizes that he is speaking; at the same time that his body is talking to Kaylee, he is attempting to contact Talon Who Rends the Soft Clay of the Flesh; as an infinitely old spirit, he might know something about these beings.

He focuses all of his will power on the Talon and begins to "speak" to it. His mental voice, unheard by all but Talon, is harsh and commanding. Tell me! What are these "Charlie's"? You must know something.

[Cogwheel]

"Ah yes, the 'Charlie's'. Tell me, who is this Charlie?"

While Nicole's transforming ornament seems to surprise others, Mirror simply watches and nods, unimpressed. It was not that her martial skill was lacking, but merely that she displayed it. Mirror knew from experience that power was at its best when hidden - for now, he would keep his strength from prying eyes. Best they think him a weak, frail creature.

"First a storyteller, next a marksman.. now a sword juggler." The construct permits itself a small smile before continuing, "Lady Kaylee, it seems your circus has arrived. What is our first act to be?"

[Lord_Gareth]

"Circus? Well, I suppose the analogy works, though you're more like hitmen than anything else. Oh, and if you're wondering why I'm taking so much time while existence is ending, it's because I temporarily deactivated time for our little conversation."

Kaylee idly cracks her neck and sighs.

Inside Claw's head, the Talon is not happy. Claw gets the distinct impression that he's woken it from something resembling a nap.

It is a name, little whelp, the spirit says testily, from a place known as Earth. Many men bear that name. Where - oh. Here.

The creature settles behind Claw's eyes, awake in its malevolence.

"Someone or something is attacking the Equation that keeps everything existing, trying to solve it. I'm going to need you to keep history going, and, in some cases, change it. This is going to be dangerous, and it's going to be deadly, and no, you don't have a choice about it, but I'd like to think you're happy to save reality. Try not to die, though - I can't create or restore life."

Kaylee stands up straighter, and when she begins to speak again, her voice echoes in your minds with some kind of inexplicable importance, a touch of prophecy and just the lightest dusting of dream.

"Nicole Seeming, I name you the Executioner, though you will take no joy from your duties."

"Claw, I name you the Riven, never to be whole."

"Quint, I name you the Deluded, ever to seek what you cannot find and recieve what you need, but do not want."

Mirror, I name you the Prophet, consumed by the very faith you spread."

Kaylee vanishes slowly, leaving behind only this parting comment.

"You have ten minutes."

[GimliFett]

Arak "Boomer" Torunn

The dwarf's grin lessens somewhat. "Hey! Don' Ah get a snazzy name? Pfagh!" He spits again, this time with a little more emphasis. Then a thought occurs to him and his smile returns, broader than before. "Heh. Nev'mind. Ah gots one a'reddy. Means mine's tha best fr'm tha start!"

Boomer tips the beverage up and chugs it down easily, then turns to the others assembled as he squeezes the metal container lightly, creating a tinny, crinkly sound. "Sooo..." he looks at each one in turn. "Whaddya thin' she meant 'bout ten minutes? Ta what?"

[Jack Mann]

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God dammit, I posted. I wrote up a post, and I'm certain I sent it through. Why is my post not here? Where did it go?

I'm going to blame Gimli. Blasted Mandelorian dwarf.

As a side note, deus ex machina translates more properly as "god from the machine." It referred to gods being lowered down into plays by using a crane (mechane), at which point they would solve whatever problems the play's characters had gotten themselves into. The god was never inside the machine, but merely delivered by it. It's possible you've conflated it with the phrase "ghost in the machine," a derogatory term for René Descartes's mind-body dualism.

Pedantry Lad, at your service!

An older man looked around. Dressed as he was in simple, travel-worn clothes, and carrying an old pack, he looked out of place in the assemblage.

"Well, this is an interesting delirium," Owl said, a puzzled smile on his face. Clearly, this couldn't be, so he decided that it probably didn't. He was sure to go mad, otherwise. "What have I been drinking, to have such visions? I drank the last of the fairy wine a half a dozen summers ago." He looked at the others, particularly interested in Mirror. "Fascinating. I hope you won't take offense, but I've never seen anything like you. Excuse me. On the off chance that this is real, I suppose I should introduce myself. My friends call me Owl. I'm a traveler, from place to place, though never a place like this. I fear I've little enough skill for world-saving. My skills extend mostly to a little schooling and medicine."

[Cogwheel]

Mirror leans back in his chair, calmly replying to the somewhat unstable dwarf, "What she might mean by 'ten minutes', I know not. Given my luck thus far today, I assume she means ten minutes until the end of the universe. If this is true, however, than there is no point to panicking. After all, we could do nothing at all in ten minutes, correct?

As to you...Owl, in my world, there are many of my kind. We were made by many countries as machines to fight in a long war. You are right, however, that I am of unusual make among them, to say the least. Where most were designed to trust in the blade they held, I wield... faith."

So.. this is how it was to be. For a fleeting moment, the war was over and he, like all others of his kind, was free. Now, it seemed he was bound in chains once more. Another human at the reins, another set of chains... another war. Yet once it seemed as though he warred against the entire world for the cause of one. Now, this appeared to have been reversed... but it mattered not, chains were chains. he cared not for the world.

[Djinn_in_Tonic]

Nicole flips her massive blade into the air, deftly catches the resulting hair clip, and fastens it back in place.

"We've got ten minutes. We could, like, stand around talking, or we could look around, find what we're supposed to do, and, like, totally kick ass."

The girl raises an eyebrow at the stunned expressions of her companions.

"Come on. You didn't think that I was, like, actually that much of a ditz, did you? I mean, give me some credit."

With that, she kneels down and fiddles with something in her left shoe. Seconds later the sound of a powerful beat fills the air, and a wave of heavy metal music breaks over the clearing. Nicole perks up at this, seemingly caught up in the tempo.

"Let's rock this place."

[TRM]

Claw

Claw stands, the presence of The Talon always makes him angry and sullen. "Then let's get on with it, assuming of course that this whole cursed place doesn't just disappear now that its creator is gone."

[Inspectre]

Finding this newest addition to his drink far more to his liking, Quint quietly sits back to enjoy it. He watches the proceedings around him with only a modicum of interest, instead savoring his drink while considering this latest turn of events.

The very idea of the entire multiverse coming to an end was patently rediculous, although Quint had certainly seen (and created) his share of strange things. Assuming it was true and not some capricious prank being played on them by their host, Quint wasn't even sure stopping it was the right thing to do, assuming stopping it would even be possible.

The only thing constant throughout the multiverse was change - every living thing was born, it grew, and eventually it died. Even the gods were not exempt from this rule, as Quint had painfully learned from personal experience. This did not mean Quint was suicidal, as even existence trapped in the feeble powerless body of a human was preferable to non-existence. But change, even in the forms of death and ultimate collapse into formless oblivion, was a natural and immutable aspect of the multiverse.

There were however steps that could be taken to prolong life, as Kaylee seemed to have done in regards to prolonging existence. Quint wondered what sort of unexpected side-effects her efforts so far had yielded as the price for prolonging the multiverse, for things like this usually had some cost or another.

Then again, it sounded as if something was taking deliberate steps now to oppose Kaylee and bring the great play to a close. Artificial action to end all existence was certainly different than natural change and decay, and Quint decided that such action probably should be opposed by any sane individual. And he apparently also was going to be forced in action against this unknown force of decay whether he wanted to or not - although there still was always a choice. Even with a blade held to one's throat, the other alternative was always refusal and death. In this case though, Quint concluded that he was firmly on the side of preserving existence.

Quint was just starting to focus in on the conversation around him again when Kaylee mentioned his name, followed a moment later by an apparent title: "The Deluded". That was certainly a disconcerting thing for her to label him. Quint was able to respond with some sort of witty retort, as soon as he could find the right words, when Kaylee faded away, leaving him and his new companions alone.

"Well, this certainly is going to be interesting. I imagine that her warning was in regards to us being dumped wherever it is we're going for our first little "assignment". If she hates us, we'll probably end up in the thick of it too. Best be prepared for things to go from bad to worse."

Finishing the last of his drink, Quint tossed the metal can over his shoulder onto the ground behind his chair - if she could wipe powerful demons from existence Kaylee could certainly clean up her own domain as well. He then pushed himself out of his chair, stretching and warming up his muscles. No sense in not being prepared to run if they got dumped into a hostile situation - and if the got dumped into a non-hostile situation, but a delicate one nonetheless, Quint was sure he'd be able to talk his way out of it.

[Lord_Gareth]

"Time," Kaylee says with a heavy sigh as she manifests, "is up. Sorry for leaving like that, but there was a massive meteor heading towards K'chata Three, and I had to do some timeline editing."

She flips through the pages of a book that wasn't there just a moment ago, obviously stalling for time while she talks.

"First, I bear none of you ill will. You literally had the luck of the draw. If it helps, the odds against you being picked were quite literally infinity to one. In a way, you're all lucky. When this is over, I'll help you guys out in whatever ways I can - and being nearly omnipotent means that's a lot of ways."

She puts her finger on a page.

"Found it. Your first assignment is simple. Year 892174152 Nexus Time, Kyria Kavon gets with child by the Shadow Lord, the former ruler of the Plane of Shadow. That fall, she gives birth to a daughter who will eventually take his place, though he intends to use her as a tool. Someone is altering the time stream and I don't have time to find out who, so your assignment is simple - make sure Syra Kavon is born alive. Any questions?"

[Inspectre]

Quint had several questions.

"Alright, so we're to protect the mother of this child to ensure it gets born, sounds simple enough. But are we supposed to guarding her for the whole gestation period? What is that, nine months? And even if there is only one specific attempt being made to alter the timeline, what's to stop whoever is doing this from trying again one month later after we leave? Furthermore, wouldn't our interference muddle things up even more than they already apparently are?"

Quint thinks for a moment, and then continues on his new current tangent.

"Actually, speaking of interference, do you know how this event is going to be altered and by what? Because if some gaping portal openned by some interdimensional horror is supposed to now appear and suck mother and baby up, I don't think we're going to be able to do anything about it without some heavy assistance from you. Of course, if whoever is altering things is using agents from within that world: say, a motley band of orcs - no, let's make them kobolds, I could probably take a motley kobold - then I suppose us "lucky heroes" could probably deal with it."

[Lord_Gareth]

"Whoever this is has to act the same way I do in order to prevent causality from annihilating them -namely, through coincidence, happenstance, and other means. So, the attempt comes in the form of a gang of Sigil toughs who will notice that the birth has nulled Kyria's wards. Afterwards, Kyria will be able to defend her child. Any attempt at direct interference will expose the enemy, which would then result in me destroying them."

She shrugs.

"As to interference, paradox doesn't affect me or my agents. Don't fret about that part."

[TRM]

Claw

"So, all we have to do is kill some thugs?" Claw paces through the trees. I assume she'll send us there when she's ready, that's not even worth asking. What we need to know is more about Sigil, but it will be difficult to find any cursed information on an alternate—possibly virtual—world.

He slows his pacing and returns to his seat, the answers would have to wait; for now he would just take things as they come.

[TRM]

Claw

"So, all we have to do is kill some thugs?" Claw paces through the trees. I assume she'll send us there when she's ready, that's not even worth asking. What we need to know is more about Sigil, but it will be difficult to find any cursed information on an alternate—possibly virtual—world.

He slows his pacing and returns to his seat, the answers would have to wait; for now he would just take things as they come.

[Cogwheel]

So.. it would seem that we are nothing more than pawns in a game of chess, held between two beings that are at once seemingly both omnipotent and powerless. So be it.. if it is a battle they wish for, than that is what I will give them.

These thoughts in his mind, the prophet nods before finally speaking, "Understood. I have but two questions before I depart - firstly, do you have any information as to the nature of these attackers? Secondly, what are their numbers, and how much time do we have between our arrival and their attack?"

[Lord_Gareth]

"I can't predict how long you'll have until they attack, because the time stream is in a flux. Until you succeed or fail, the future is indeterminate. As to their numbers, it's a gang of cutters and bashers, maybe a finger-waggler or two. I wouldn't put their numbers greater than twenty, and that's if another gang hasn't gone after them by the time you show up."

Kaylee smiles and directs her next comment at Claw.

"So, yes, all you have to do is kill some thugs."

[Inspectre]

Quint rubbed his chin thoughtfully at this information - their first assignment certainly seemed easy . . . almost deceptively so.

"Well, killing some thugs sounds about on the order of killing a motley crew of kobolds. Although the idea of there being anywhere from one to twenty of them is a bit disconcerting - and I don't suppose you have any more specific details on how they're going to pull this assassination off."

Quint rubbed at his chin some more.

"Any chance we could just buy these guys off, convince them whatever or whoever paid them for this, we'd give them double to just walk away? I hate thinking about tackling a problem from just one direction - too confining." Quint added, turning to the rest of his own motley crew.

"But, while we're on the subject of slaughtering these guys mercilessly, do any of you happen to be skilled with arcane or divine magic? In my travels I've learned how to mimic the use of such magic, although wizardry is not really a speciality of mine: perhaps a fragment of my divine nature? In any case, the only drawback to this ability is that I must siphon the necessary power for casting such a spell from someone who can naturally cast said spell first. There shouldn't be any pain from the process, although you would temporarily lose the ability to cast that spell. Still, it would be a nice ace in the hole for us if the guy in studded leather armor could cast a few spells as well, don't you think?"

(Unfortunately, I think Jack Mann's poor Archivist is the only viable person Quint can siphon free spells from him, and given how few he has I think Quint's going to have to rely on the occassional odd enemy twiddle-fingers to keep him going. )

[GimliFett]

Arak "Boomer" Torunn

"They call me a black powder mage, but Ah don't cast no spells," the dwarf offers with a shrug. "Sorry."

[Djinn_in_Tonic]

"Yeah, me neither."

Nicole shrugs apologetically, and then turns to Kaylee.

"You want to, like, get us out of here, girlfriend? The sooner we begin the sooner we can, like, get back."

[Jack Mann]

"I know a few charms," Owl said cautiously. He wasn't used to freely speaking of magic, except with certain scholars, fair folk, and tinkers. Then again, this was probably not real. "I might be able to help with the delivery, or to bandage you if you get hurt. I know a little about healing. But I doubt I'd be much help in a fight. I carry the crossbow mostly as a bluff. I'm no Tom o' the Wood," he said, referring to a legendary bandit archer in the greenwoods.

He personally thought this was foolish (if it was real at all, which was absurd). It would surely make more sense for these powerful beings to call in people more powerful. Certainly, the others might have been more powerful than him (and one claimed to be a god), but he was hardly the stuff of legends. Just a man who knew a little more than most, though rarely quite enough.