LGBTAitp - Part Ten

[Jacklu]

Welcome, one and all.

This is a thread where we Playgrounders, and LGBTAitp in particular, gather to discuss, share our experiences, give general advice and support one another in such matters as arise relating to, well, the world beyond heteronormaitivity.

• Everyone is welcome. Let's try to keep from seeming otherwise.
• Keep this topic free of politics and religion. (so, don't violate the board rules, plz)
• It's beyond the scope of this thread to discuss whether LGBT is "Right." (And really, most discussions probably should avoid moralizing too much anyway)
• Please refrain from posting sexually explicit content. (Keep it friendly as well as board safe )

If you would rather be anonymous when asking for advice or sharing your story or views, you can use the address below to send a message to be posted in this thread via proxy.

http://anonmail.smeenet.org/

Keep in mind that content which contain strong language may be filtered (Plus, y'know, the forum-filters), and content that violates the forum rules won't be posted at all.

Here are the links for the last few threads, where much of use or interest may be found:

1. LGBT people in the playground
   
2. LGBT people in the playground - part II
   
3. LGBTitp - part III
   
4. LGBTitp 4: We are a family?
   
5. LGBTitp - Part Five
   
6. LGBTitp - Part Six
   
7. LGBTitp - Part Seven
   
8. LGBTitp - Part Eight
   
9. LGBTitp - Part Nine

*modified from the original.

[WarKitty]

Oooo hello there! Shiny shiny pretty new thread! *frolicks*

From the last thread:

Spoiler

Show

So how many of you have had the experience of making a friend of someone you get along really well with, only to find out later that the person is a complete bigot?

[Skeppio]

*inhales deeply* Ah, nothing beats that new thread smell.

@WarKitty: Short answer, no. Slightly longer answer, one of the last posts in the old thread.

Thankfully, all my friends are kind, accepting and all-around awesome. Sorry to hear you've run into that sort of person. *hugs*

[Danne]

Huh. I hadn't realized we'd reached 50 pages on the last one yet. XD

@WarKitty: Can't say that's something I've ever encountered myself. That's not saying much, as I don't really have any friends right now. :/ I shall hope that any I eventually make do not do this to me.

[tgva8889]

@WarKitty: Yes. I am no longer friends with that person, so it worked out for me in the end.

@Danne: You know, I find it very interesting how all my friends that I've made recently or started talking to again have decided this year is the time to re-evaluate all their friendships and figure out who actually cares about them. I even did it. It's just strange, is all. They found that the people they were friends with really just didn't care about them. I care, though. If you want a friend, I'll be around sometimes.

[cycoris]

*frolics with WarKitty*

...um, you know, as a cat. So it's not weird, right? >.>

Was wondering, does anyone else find themselves more attracted to people of the same sex as the gender of the whomever they're going out with?

Wow, that was convoluted.

[Swotezo]

{Scrubbed}

[DeadManSleeping]

*frolics with WarKitty*

...um, you know, as a cat. So it's not weird, right? >.>

*looks at thread title*

Odd place to be defensive about it.

Was wondering, does anyone else find themselves more attracted to people of the same sex as the gender of the whomever they're going out with?

Wow, that was convoluted.

Being attracted to one person of a sex could make you be more attracted to other people of that same sex, or it could make you less attracted. And that could change over time.

Aren't people odd?

[cycoris]

Being attracted to one person of a sex could make you be more attracted to other people of that same sex, or it could make you less attracted. And that could change over time.

Aren't people odd?

Yeah, but this isn't being attracted to people the same sex as your SO, it's about being attracted to people who belong to the sex that's commonly associated with your SO's gender, but not necessarily their sex.

[Coidzor]

^: You know that you can just use plain language, we can generally grok you, and you're well-liked enough that you don't need to cover your booty... well, in this context anyway.

Was wondering, does anyone else find themselves more attracted to people of the same sex as the gender of the whomever they're going out with?

Wow, that was convoluted.

So what makes the gender non-redundant? I mean, AFAIK, only a handful of us have dated trans individuals.

I imagine it's a sort of reinforcing trend of modulating one's carnal tastes. Now, as to the relative frequency of this vs. no-change vs. increased desire/fantasies about members of the opposite sex of one's partner... It's possible someone's looked into that before...

[Swotezo]

{Scrubbed}

[Swotezo]

{Scrubbed}

[Serpentine]

..."aheterosexual"? I could be wrong, but I'm pretty sure she has a boyfriend - apparently a boyfriend with a nontraditional "gender" identity, but still a boyfriend - which would make him either heterosexual or bisexual. Also a transvestite is someone who cross-dresses, and I don't think we know one way or the other whether he does that.

Don't even know what the other thing is.

Regarding the original question, at a guess, I would suppose that you are finding those features that attract you to your boyfriend, in these other people.

[tgva8889]

I think "aheterosexual" is just a typo for "a heterosexual."

[turkishproverb]

*hugs WarKitty*

Sorry about the friend.

*frolics with WarKitty*

...um, you know, as a cat. So it's not weird, right? >.>

Was wondering, does anyone else find themselves more attracted to people of the same sex as the gender of the whomever they're going out with?

Wow, that was convoluted.

Heh. Indeed. I've tangled sentences worse.

[Mystic Muse]

I've had that experience Warkitty.

Doesn't like Homosexuals or Transsexuals. I'm hoping I can eventually change his mind though since he's my cousin.

[Beelzebub1111]

New thread, Clean slate.

@Warkitty - Similar, but not the same. I found that he used to be a litteral gay basher but that was when he was also doing cocaine and before he got into the military. He's fully recovered now and is actually a really nice guy.

I often feel bad when I find myself attracted to FtM and MtF. It feels like I'm fetishising the state of in-betweenness when they want to be on one distinct side.

[Coidzor]

I often feel bad when I find myself attracted to FtM and MtF. It feels like I'm fetishising the state of in-betweenness when they want to be on one distinct side.

So, what, you're only attracted to transitioning individuals regardless of tackle rather than either after they've transitioned? I have to admit, I can't really grok how that works.

Or are you making more of a statement about the metaphysical impossibility involved and asserting that by their nature they're always inbetween the two gulfs due to the SOL nature of the current reality and it's that which you feel you've fetishized rather than their status in regards to transitioning?

[Ricky S]

Life would be so much easier if humans were hermaphrodites. Then we would all be equal.

[Coidzor]

Life would be so much easier is humans were hermaphrodites.

Then we'd be snails. Or never leave the house.

[Ricky S]

Then we'd be snails. Or never leave the house.

Yea but at least then there wouldnt be so much confusion over sexuality and there wouldnt be any dominant sex like there is in current society. (why would we never leave the house?)

[Coidzor]

Yea but at least then there wouldnt be so much confusion over sexuality and there wouldnt be any dominant sex like there is in current society. (why would we never leave the house?)

That is an exercise I'll leave to your imagination. It might simplify things, but it would take away a certain je ne sais quoi from opening up another person's hood if everyone came out to a factory's specifications.

[Beelzebub1111]

So, what, you're only attracted to transitioning individuals regardless of tackle rather than either after they've transitioned? I have to admit, I can't really grok how that works.

Or are you making more of a statement about the metaphysical impossibility involved and asserting that by their nature they're always inbetween the two gulfs due to the SOL nature of the current reality and it's that which you feel you've fetishized rather than their status in regards to transitioning?

First, It's not an only thing. I have a wide variety of tastes, but in this case It's more like I'm very attracted to androgyny and I find, not just the look (though it is a big part), but even the mental state differentiating from the physical to be ingriguing and attractive. But then I start to feel bad about being attracted to someone's internal conflict and struggles rather than who they are as a person.

[bluewind95]

Shiny new thread! Someday there will be an A in the title

@Warkitty: Yes. Yes I did. I managed to actually convince him that LGBT people adopting is far better (even if you consider it evil) than the fate of many of those children. And I think I SORT OF got him convinced that LGBT people are no more paedophilic than hetero people. But man... that guy is a HUGE bigot. And his mom? I didn't even dare discuss it with her.

... Man... I'm starting to resent being asexual without being aromantic. It makes things so hard and complicated...

[Cobra_Ikari]

@Kitty: My older sister is a lot like that. Well, really, my family is quite bigoted, but my older sister is soooooo sweet, she's the only one I really enjoy being around. It used to be a bit of a problem, but she's toned down quite a bit, and I think she's reached the point where even if she doesn't agree with it, she accepts or tolerates it, and does so without constant preaching on morality.

@Rissy: I am confused in so many circles, what? Please explain in a way that I can understand? >.<

[KenderWizard]

I've had the turned-out-to-be-a-bigot experience. Then they further turned out to be a complete psycho and betrayed me. I guess it all worked out in the end, because I'm not friends with them anymore, but it was pretty emotionally damaging, all told!

[Cobra_Ikari]

I've had the turned-out-to-be-a-bigot experience. Then they further turned out to be a complete psycho and betrayed me. I guess it all worked out in the end, because I'm not friends with them anymore, but it was pretty emotionally damaging, all told!

That's never fun. *hugs tight*

[Skeppio]

I've had the turned-out-to-be-a-bigot experience. Then they further turned out to be a complete psycho and betrayed me. I guess it all worked out in the end, because I'm not friends with them anymore, but it was pretty emotionally damaging, all told!

That's terrible... *hugs*

[Coidzor]

Beelzebub: Well, that's good at least. Would probably need some serious effort put into it if it precluded other sexual or romantic interest.

I've had the turned-out-to-be-a-bigot experience. Then they further turned out to be a complete psycho and betrayed me. I guess it all worked out in the end, because I'm not friends with them anymore, but it was pretty emotionally damaging, all told!

Sorry you weren't able to get out without getting burned like that. Though I'm kinda relieved because I initially misread that as an experience with your father having a psychotic episode on you after having his bigotry outed. I probably should wake up a bit before I come into this thread...x.x

[cycoris]

@Rissy: I am confused in so many circles, what? Please explain in a way that I can understand? >.<

Well, using the example of a pre- or non-op FtM, it would mean that while going out with him, I'd tend towards being attracted to guys even though his body might not reflect that. And vice versa.

...or something like that.