Crack Pairings V - We Revel in Infamy

[The Dark Fiddler]

It wouls still be weird if they suddenly transformed into other races.

Unless you were doing one of those things where the players are transported into the game they're playing.

Maybe if they slowly transformed, over a period of a few days.

And it takes them that long to realise why they're growing point ears.

I know not of these people, so I can't use any names. Fill in whatever you like.

Person 1: Hey, your ears are a bit...
Person 2: A bit what? *Feels ears, shudders* ohmigawd...
Person 1: What? What's wrong?!
Person 2: Nothing. Now on an unrelated note, nobody disturb me for the next 20 minutes or so. *Pokes ears again*

[Eztheria]

And back to work!

God I hate homework.

So do I, so do I.

Tomorrow you'll get a floor plan of this thread that I puzzled together with the help of your comments on where I find what I look for. I'd do it on DungeonDesigner, but I misplaced the CD.

[Zanaril]

Honestly Tell me what sexual fetish is this?

Pointy ears.

Okay, so here's a short Elan/Shadowdancer. Short because I have history homework.

Bwah! I wonder if Elan took up the offer...

[Asta Kask]

I'm no writer, but I can think up squicky pairings. Now, we all know that Belkar is going to DIEDIEDIEDIEDIE!!! and not come back as an undead whatever. Don't we? Good.

But in another universe, Tsukiko re-animated Belkar and decided to take revenge on him by making him her love-slave...

[Asta Kask]

Huh, What ya talkin about. Honestly Tell me what sexual fetish is this?

As established earlier, elven ears are an erogenous zone roughly equal to women's breasts.

Dammit: double post

[Closak]

Or a dragons tail.

Don't forget the tails man.

[Yiuel]

Heh, DC 80+ Escape Artist check to get inside people, even if those people are smaller than you.

And yet again D&D rules rapes logic and pisses on it.


...*Uses Escape Artist to squeeze inside a Halfling*

Look! A Huge sized black dragon somehow manages to fit inside a Halfling!



...Stupid innuendo

Is there a way to succeed a check that high Without using magic?

Otherwise, I'm going crazy (and having lots of fun) :

Spoiler

Show

The boyz, at high school :

Inspired by this Youtube video.

And the girlz :

[CoffeeIncluded]

But in another universe, Tsukiko re-animated Belkar and decided to take revenge on him by making him her love-slave...

But would Belkar consider that a bad thing?

As established earlier, elven ears are an erogenous zone roughly equal to women's breasts.

It's one of the rules of the thread.

What did you think of my latest one. Unfortunately, I forgot to put the erotic shadow puppetry (Which I was unfortunately forced to bear witness to a few years back), which is why I did Elan/Shadowdancer in the first place.

But feel free to use it in your own pairings, like with the soundproofed music rooms.

[Closak]

...ABD/The schools janitor in the soundproofed music rooms.
Now featuring half-dragon offspring as a result.
And a very traumatized janitor.

[Oooohaloophole]

Okay, so here's a short Elan/Shadowdancer. Short because I have history homework.

Spoiler

Show

The Shadowdancer--Alan--made a little noise of surprise. He wasn't expecting the King of Nowhere to show up so early! And with so many extra people as well! He silently counted the number of people to himself...Hotel staff, dwarf advisor, a redhead who was probably a prostitute, and...

Ugh. He could faintly make out a person with a green shirt and blond hair, but he couldn't see who it was in detail. And the blood was starting to rush to his head.

Alan swung back and forth, trying to get a better look at whoever it was, when he overshot, crashing through the window into an ignominious heap in front of the King of Nowhere.

He gulped and started to sweat as the king, the staff, and his advisers crowded around him.

"What the--Who are you?!" shouted one of the hotel staff.

"Isn't it obvious? Black suit, black mask, all-around sneaky appearance?" Alan started to sweat even more--How did the king's concubine reach the correct conclusion so quickly? He had to find a way out of this and fast. Alan opened his mouth, ready to say whatever came to mind first, when--

"No Haley, he's a jester!" It was the young man with blond hair and...Brilliant blue eyes...A shirt that advertised his lithe form...Lilting voice...

Alan found himself sweating for an entirely different reason.

"A what? Elan, has that concussion knocked the last bit of sense out of your head?"

Alan interrupted before the King's suspicion's could be rekindled. "N-No! The handsome young man is right; I am a jester! See? Give me some fruit or something."

"Okay..." Alan was handed three apples. He sighed and began juggling them, thanking the gods that he used to be a street performer.

"See? See! I told you, Roy!"

And there was that handsome young man again...And now he was joining in, standing next to him...Concentrate Alan, concentrate..."

"Juggle, juggle, juggle, juggle the apples for the king!"

Alan didn't know how, but he somehow managed to get through that without arousing any more suspicion. He smiled at the young man--Elan--Who smiled back innocently.

Alan sidled over and said, "Room 608, cutie," as he grabbed Elan's behind and walked out the door.

He didn't notice Elan's eyes, wide with shock. Nor the slight whimper that came from his mouth.

He also didn't notice Haley's expression of murderous rage.

And back to work!

God I hate homework.

Heh heh heh. You know, if I went back in time to tell myself i would be reading fanfiction I think i would choke myself.


I share your pain on homework as well (Its all a conspiracy in order for us to go to therapy more!

Oh pionty ears, i had that even before I joined this thread( the fetish not the ears....Dont we wish we did? Living for hundreds of years, casting spells pointy ears).

...ABD/The schools janitor in the soundproofed music rooms.
Now featuring half-dragon offspring as a result.
And a very traumatized janitor.

God closak have some self restraint......Whats ABD? Let me guess ANOTHER erotic sexual fetish

[The Dark Fiddler]

So do I, so do I.

Tomorrow you'll get a floor plan of this thread that I puzzled together with the help of your comments on where I find what I look for. I'd do it on DungeonDesigner, but I misplaced the CD.

You are dedicated to the ways of the crack.

[Closak]

ABD is the Ancient Black Dragon.


I am of the firm belief that she was in her complete right in trying to kill V's kids.
Really, V started it.
Don't do it to others if you don't want it to happen to yourself.

[Nathander]

Cute story, CoffeeIncluded. I liked how well you captured the Shadowdancer's growing discomfort/attraction to Elan. That worked out real well.

Nice ending, too.

Or a dragons tail.

Don't forget the tails man.

Dragon's tail is a fantastic aphrodisiac.

[Oooohaloophole]

ABD is the Ancient Black Dragon.


I am of the firm belief that she was in her complete right in trying to kill V's kids.
Really, V started it.
Don't do it to others if you don't want it to happen to yourself.

Steals Half your hoard and Leeves an IOU Note.
I prepared Symbol of death spell this moarning. Oh I also like tails as well

[CoffeeIncluded]

Cute story, CoffeeIncluded. I liked how well you captured the Shadowdancer's growing discomfort/attraction to Elan. That worked out real well.

Nice ending, too.

Thank you.

Dragon's tail is a fantastic aphrodisiac.

One time a man with a...Lackluster love life tried making a potion made from dragon's tail and elven ears (Both donated).

He tried one drop of the potion with his girlfriend. They didn't get out of bed for a week. Afterwards, exhilarated by the effects, he tried downing the entire vial at once.

...

Today the potion can only be purchased with a prescription. Consumption of more than two drops of it at any one time will result in this.

[Closak]

...STUPID!

Seriously stupid.


That's what you get for being an idiot


Also, why is there a half-dragon rabbit on my lawn?

[Mystic Muse]

Because ABD is cheating on you.

[Zanaril]

Because ABD is cheating on you.

With last night's dinner.

[CoffeeIncluded]

With last night's dinner.

...Maybe you need that potion.

[Zanaril]

...Maybe you need that potion.

Nah, the ABD always does that.

They have elf for dinner quite often.

[Mystic Muse]

except she cheated with a rabbit not an elf.

I don't think you want to know what else she cheated with Closak.

[Closak]

Yeah, funny thing about female dragons.

If the victim is anything else than another dragon they have a habit of eating them once the breeding is over with.

ABD: Now that we are done mating i'm going to eat you *Gobbles up rabbit* Yum-yum.

Heh.


...Half-dragon horse?
...Half-dragon centaur?
Half-dragon purple worm?
Half-dragon gelatinous cube...
Half-dragon shark!?

...What the...

[Zanaril]

except she cheated with a rabbit not an elf.

Yea, Closak's hunting session didn't go so well that day.

[Oooohaloophole]

...STUPID!
Also, why is there a half-dragon rabbit on my lawn?

Since Rabbits Reproduce Rather Quickly you better eat it or itl take over the world.

[Closak]

...*Planeshifts rabbit*

It can take over another plane instead for all i care.

...*Noms a random elf who was passing by*

[Kyronea]

Okay, so here's a short Elan/Shadowdancer. Short because I have history homework.

Spoiler

Show

The Shadowdancer--Alan--made a little noise of surprise. He wasn't expecting the King of Nowhere to show up so early! And with so many extra people as well! He silently counted the number of people to himself...Hotel staff, dwarf advisor, a redhead who was probably a prostitute, and...

Ugh. He could faintly make out a person with a green shirt and blond hair, but he couldn't see who it was in detail. And the blood was starting to rush to his head.

Alan swung back and forth, trying to get a better look at whoever it was, when he overshot, crashing through the window into an ignominious heap in front of the King of Nowhere.

He gulped and started to sweat as the king, the staff, and his advisers crowded around him.

"What the--Who are you?!" shouted one of the hotel staff.

"Isn't it obvious? Black suit, black mask, all-around sneaky appearance?" Alan started to sweat even more--How did the king's concubine reach the correct conclusion so quickly? He had to find a way out of this and fast. Alan opened his mouth, ready to say whatever came to mind first, when--

"No Haley, he's a jester!" It was the young man with blond hair and...Brilliant blue eyes...A shirt that advertised his lithe form...Lilting voice...

Alan found himself sweating for an entirely different reason.

"A what? Elan, has that concussion knocked the last bit of sense out of your head?"

Alan interrupted before the King's suspicion's could be rekindled. "N-No! The handsome young man is right; I am a jester! See? Give me some fruit or something."

"Okay..." Alan was handed three apples. He sighed and began juggling them, thanking the gods that he used to be a street performer.

"See? See! I told you, Roy!"

And there was that handsome young man again...And now he was joining in, standing next to him...Concentrate Alan, concentrate..."

"Juggle, juggle, juggle, juggle the apples for the king!"

Alan didn't know how, but he somehow managed to get through that without arousing any more suspicion. He smiled at the young man--Elan--Who smiled back innocently.

Alan sidled over and said, "Room 608, cutie," as he grabbed Elan's behind and walked out the door.

He didn't notice Elan's eyes, wide with shock. Nor the slight whimper that came from his mouth.

He also didn't notice Haley's expression of murderous rage.

And back to work!

God I hate homework.

Mmm...(to the story, not the homework.)

[Oooohaloophole]

...*Planeshifts rabbit*

It can take over another plane instead for all i care.

...*Noms a random elf who was passing by*

THAT WAS MY BEST FRIEND! (Jumps out with spells Ready and an army of Undead Dragon Waitresses).
Edit: Nah not realy, but youl make a fine addition to my seriosly messed up collection.

[Closak]

So? *Calls my master to smite Oooohaloophole*

...Dude...overkill, there was no need to throw him into a black hole!
Master: Who cares, problem solved, now if you excuse me i have other things to do *Vanishes*


...*Goes back to my cave*

[CoffeeIncluded]

Mmm...(to the story, not the homework.)

...I take it you liked my description of Elan?

[Mystic Muse]

So? *Calls my master to smite Oooohaloophole*

Hello, My name is Hiro Asakura, You killed my friend. Prepare to die.

SMITE EVIL!My name is not really Hiro Asakura. it's a D&D character of mine.

oh and you were indirectly responsible Closak. you're going to die as well. SMITE EVIL! (these are both the non double entendre version.)