Jude's Judgmental Jugular Jab and Jibber Jabbery Random Banter #115

[Phaedra]

May I add this quote to my signature?

Sure, it's all yours.

[Fredthefighter]

Well people, the time gallops forward and in a matter of time, all the couples of the world can gloat at all the single people, making them feel guilty for being single and making them wish for all the gloaty couples to get run over by a frigging bus.
Valentine's day: The big, steaming, festering pile of turd that infests the planet every freaking year!
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Okay, rant over. Positive Fred/Francine is back now.
Valentine's day: A day for fostering love and newfound relationships across the world.
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Notice the difference between the negative and postive views on Valentine's day.

[Em Blackleaf]

The negative view is longer and has more points.

Notice how I don't like Valentine's day.

[Fredthefighter]

The negative view is longer and has more points.

Notice how I don't like Valentine's day.

I'm on the fence, it would be nice to actually end up with a Valentine on Valentine's day, especially when I see all the happy couples at school. On the other hand I feel extremely jealous and lonely, this then builds up into a hatred of the day and love itself, for a mere moment, the world turns black and the blood haze takes over. Anger builds into white-hot rage, making me want to smash the crap out of everything around me to do with Valentine's day!

{Scrubbed - easy on the profanity 'round here}

[Coidzor]

1. What happy couples? I've seen couples which are briefly not fighting and are even getting along, but I've never seen "happy couples" before. I've seen cute couples and couples that work well together but never what I'd call a happy couple.

Heck, most couples get into at least one fight on V-Day, if I recall, since tensions are so high due to the expectations to please one's lover in, well, a myriad of ways.

2. What books did you end up getting today, Monsieur Thufir?

3. Thank you Mademoiselle Phaedra.

4. Aren't you a little young to be jaded there, Miss Blackleaf? Wait till you have a very lovely evening with someone and then the morning after they're bawling about how much of a mistake it was. Then you can be jaded about life and love like I am.

[Fredthefighter]

1. What happy couples? I've seen couples which are briefly not fighting and are even getting along, but I've never seen "happy couples" before. I've seen cute couples and couples that work well together but never what I'd call a happy couple.

Heck, most couples get into at least one fight on V-Day, if I recall, since tensions are so high due to the expectations to please one's lover in, well, a myriad of ways.

2. What books did you end up getting today, Monsieur Thufir?

3. Thank you Mademoiselle Phaedra.

4. Aren't you a little young to be jaded there, Miss Blackleaf? Wait till you have a very lovely evening with someone and then the morning after they're bawling about how much of a mistake it was. Then you can be jaded about life and love like I am.

They exist Coidzor, they all seem to collaborate in my school for some reason.
I've had my heart broken by 4 girls in the last 4 years. The latest one was rather recent actually.
Girl 1 "Jessica" - Boyfriend broke my nose.
Girl 2 "Gemma" - Apparently I was too short.
Girl 3 "Victoria" - She has a boyfriend, who is actually a nice guy. It couldn't be a jerk she'd break up with in a heartbeat could it? Nope, it had to be a nice guy.
Girl 4 - I don't want to talk about it.

[Thufir]

2. What books did you end up getting today, Monsieur Thufir?

In no particular order:

Trilby - George Du Maurier
The Flowers of Evil - Baudelaire
On The Origin Of Species - Darwin
Notebooks - Da Vinci
Paradise Lost - Milton
The Histories - Herodotus
Doctor Faustus And Other Plays - Marlowe

Excuse me. I have to go squee again. I love my books!

[Fawkes]

They exist Coidzor, they all seem to collaborate in my school for some reason.
I've had my heart broken by 4 girls in the last 4 years. The latest one was rather recent actually.
Girl 1 "Jessica" - Boyfriend broke my nose.
Girl 2 "Gemma" - Apparently I was too short.
Girl 3 "Victoria" - She has a boyfriend, who is actually a nice guy. It couldn't be a jerk she'd break up with in a heartbeat could it? Nope, it had to be a nice guy.
Girl 4 - I don't want to talk about it.

My advice: ask out single girls.

[Fredthefighter]

My advice: ask out single girls.

I didn't know the first one had a boyfriend. And the third one was a surprise too. At least I didn't find out one of them was a lesbian like my best friend did. He's still friends with the girl, but it's a little tense between then.

[Fawkes]

What exactly did you do that caused the girl's boyfriend to break your nose?

[Fredthefighter]

What exactly did you do that caused the girl's boyfriend to break your nose?

I asked her out. He heard it, then he punched me in the face. I was 11. It hurt like hell.

[Fawkes]

I asked her out. He heard it, then he punched me in the face. I was 11. It hurt like hell.

I'll bet it did. What a jerk.

*brotherly pat on the back*

[Fredthefighter]

I'll bet it did. What a jerk.

*brotherly pat on the back*

Believe it or not. The one that hurt the most out of the 4 of those girls was girl 2. She said I was too short. That hurt a lot that did. I got turned down because of something I can't change one bit, something that's down to genetics. I thought she was perfect at one point, then a while after she said no, she just became a normal girl in the world. That spark that had attracted me to her had gone. It just faded, I'm okay with it now though.
Girl 3 was more dissapointing than heart breaking, I still like her, but a relationship with her seems so much further away than it used to.
Girl 4 is a touchy subject, which I wish to leave alone.

[Fawkes]

Number 2 sounds like the kind of person you don't really want to be with anyway.

And hey, you're 15, right? I really wouldn't worry too much about relationships. None of the other couples are getting anything meaningful out of them. At best, they're getting occasional sloppy preteen sex, which really isn't all that great.

[Mr. Mud]

Someone. punched. Fred. . Just gemme a address, bud... Just an address . Please tell me the person that punched was a peer though..? That'd make the person seem a little less asinine.

[Fredthefighter]

Number 2 sounds like the kind of person you don't really want to be with anyway.

And hey, you're 15, right? I really wouldn't worry too much about relationships. None of the other couples are getting anything meaningful out of them. At best, they're getting occasional sloppy preteen sex, which really isn't all that great.

I suppose you're right. Looking at it just makes it seem like on big dissapointment after another.
Girl number 4 was more "Oh, now I feel like a right prat" than "Now I am heartbroken". Valentine's day screwed me over in other words.
EDIT: Mr.Mud, I haven't seen the guy who punched me in over 4 years. I don't even know if he's alive. He's my age though.

[Mr. Mud]

Wait so there is a big possiblity that the guy could be... dead? Did you get punched by a thug? .

And I mean, was he your age at the time of the nose break-age?

[Fredthefighter]

Wait so there is a big possiblity that the guy could be... dead? Did you get punched by a thug? .

And I mean, was he your age at the time of the nose break-age?

No, he was just big and a jerk. Yes, he was my age at the time of the nose break-age.
And I just said I don't know whether he's alive or not. I don't really care. It happened 4 or 5 freaking years ago. Water under the bridge.

[Mr. Mud]

I see. My nose has been through many abreak-age, so welcome to the club . I have a deviated septum right now actually...

OH and guys, I got in a car accident the other night, and also detached me retinas... Plus my brain was bleed moderately...
Am I only the only one in the playground who would tell that story laughing? =P

[Destro_Yersul]

Hmm. It appears that my lack of jaded cynicism about Valentine's day is due to the fact that I've only ever had one romantic relationship, and so far, that one seems to be working quite well.

[Fredthefighter]

I see. My nose has been through many abreak-age, so welcome to the club . I have a deviated septum right now actually...

OH and guys, I got in a car accident the other night, and also detached me retinas... Plus my brain was bleed moderately...
Am I only the only one in the playground who would tell that story laughing? =P

Nicely put. Are you okay man?

[Mr. Mud]

Nicely put. Are you okay man?

Yeah, I wish I could remember how it happened... I also wish I didn't wake up in the ER and the first thing I said was "Doc, I'm a $%#^$% Idiot." with a slightly laugh. I could've totally skipped the mental evaluation... Kidding .

But yeah, I'm okay... Never was any pain, but its scary knowing that I'd never be what I want to be (a marine), without my eyes. .

[Fredthefighter]

Yeah, I wish I could remember how it happened... I also wish I didn't wake up in the ER and the first thing I said was "Doc, I'm a $%#^$% Idiot." with a slightly laugh. I could've totally skipped the mental evaluation... Kidding .

But yeah, I'm okay... Never was any pain, but its scary knowing that I'd never be what I want to be (a marine), without my eyes. .

Jesus Christ, you had me worried for a moment there.

[Edge]

Well, that went far more easily than expected.

With my half my day, I managed to finish off the write up for my Hunter Conspiracy. Now all that is left is teh kewl powerz. Allal-Soyuf shall live, and it shall using parkour based techniques... with style.

Yes, I have pretty much based this whole organisation off of Assassin's Creed.

In other news, [SPOILERUlquiorra] released in the latest chapter of Bleach. An epic fight is imminent, one that will quite likely destabilize the surrounding geography.

@Mrmud Sorry to hear about your accident.

[Mr. Mud]

As did you with the nose breaking... I told my buddy to start the car and get some plane tickets to the UK .

[Fredthefighter]

As did you with the nose breaking... I told my buddy to start the car and get some plane tickets to the UK .

Albeit I was in pain, but you could've died. And please don't come over and beat the guy up. I'll probably control his job someday (I'm smart, he wasn't).

[Ms.Malbolge]

Aw... Poor Freddie. :flies to England. tracks down Fred. Kidnaps then uses for her own personal amusement (Which mostly involve him doing Hobbit impersonations ):

I was probably a right fine b***h today. Had a rose delivered to my ex (who works in the same place I do) with a letter attached. I told a friend of mine to snatch the letter when it arrived and read it out loud in the break room. He did.

Much laughter ensued while my ex was insanely ticked off.

Needless to say it's a love letter that goes on about their time together and how their first kiss was magic. (He was probably thinking it was his current SO) then at the end... It said 'Love now and forever, John."

He spent the rest of the day being teased.

It was a bit petty of me... But I don't care! It was hilarious!

[Fredthefighter]

Aw... Poor Freddie. :flies to England. tracks down Fred. Kidnaps then uses for her own personal amusement (Which mostly involve him doing Hobbit impersonations ):

I was probably a right fine b***h today. Had a rose delivered to my ex (who works in the same place I do) with a letter attached. I told a friend of mine to snatch the letter when it arrived and read it out loud in the break room. He did.

Much laughter ensued while my ex was insanely ticked off.

Needless to say it's a love letter that goes on about their time together and how their first kiss was magic. (He was probably thinking it was his current SO) then at the end... It said 'Love now and forever, John."

He spent the rest of the day being teased.

It was a bit petty of me... But I don't care! It was hilarious!

"I can't carry the ring Mr.Frodo, but I can carry you"
"And my axe"
I do Gimli impressions too.
And that is the best revenge scheme I have ever heard of. I applaud you Ms.Malbolge.
Now I have an idea for my revenge.
Where's that catapult and the fake severred heads? Hehehe.
EDIT: And just to let you know, I think I'd go willingly.

[Kaelaroth]

Albeit I was in pain, but you could've died. And please don't come over and beat the guy up. I'll probably control his job someday (I'm smart, he wasn't).

... Yeah. You're smart, he wasn't. Which means you'll be likely to be his boss, even though there's no chance whatsoever that you won't go into the same field, and, honestly, you'll most definitely hit the same company or place of work.
It's fate, that's what it is!

[Fredthefighter]

... Yeah. You're smart, he wasn't. Which means you'll be likely to be his boss, even though there's no chance whatsoever that you won't go into the same field, and, honestly, you'll most definitely hit the same company or place of work.
It's fate, that's what it is!

I was using the classic stereotype that the smart guy suffers from the dumb guy in the beginning and then gets his revenge where it matters.