Shipping V: The Squick and The Dead

[happyturtle]

Ship! Comments!

@H.P.Turtlecraft: GW <3's pragmatic Raistlin! Definitely a...hero(?)...I can root for!

My goal with Raistlin was to make a neutral character who wasn't a selfish jerk. I hope I succeeded! And I also attributed to him a lot of my own personal views on stories and meaning and Truth, because it's hardly the kind of thing that my sensual barbarian would think about. (Still waiting to see if Raistlin approves of how I've characterized him though.)

In addition, I owe Coidzor for the idea of the blood rituals to the Dark Gods. I'd love to see this explored more deeply.

Now, let's see if I can get Ship Wars typed in before the end of lunch.

[happyturtle]

Ship Wars

Episode V: The Empire Ships Back
Part 8

Starring:
FF Fanboy as Fanboy Skywalker
Doihaveaname? as Artoodihan
Deathslayer7 as Liriel
Saint Nil as Master Saint Nil Yoda

Mentioned:
Vespe Ratavo as Darth Vespe
Darkcomet as Darth Comet
Kaelaroth as Alek
Reinholdt as Calublufiok
Draken as Himself
Blue Umbrella as Topsy Kretts

(Full cast list and links to previous instalments here)

Spoiler

Show

"Okay! Training! What do I do first?"

"First, take off your shirt and start doing acrobatic stunts, like standing on one hand." Saint Nil Yoda said.

"Um, what for? How will that help me fight Bath Vader?"

"It won't. It's just for fanservice."

Meanwhile, Liriel and Artoodihan worked on repairing the ship.

"Is Nil planning on telling Fanboy who Bath Vader really is?" Artoodihan asked.

"Course not. That's for the climax of the film." Liriel said.

"Isn't it really irresponsible to send him off to war knowing that Bath Vader will certainly use this knowledge to try and turn him to the Dark Side?"

"I notice you haven't told him either." Liriel pointed out.

"Hey, what do you want? I already overrode the script once to keep him from snogging his sister. Got reprimanded for it too. I don't want to get fired." Artoo complained.

"Oh don't worry. I'm sure Bath will never figure out that the kid that shares his surname is related to him in any way."

***

"Now, Fanboy, Use the Force! Go the distance! Carpe diem! Win one for the gipper!" Saint Nil's inspirational platitudes went on for some time until Fanboy was all psyched up and ready to go.

"Now," Nil said. "Your final exam. Go into that creepy cave over there and face your worst fear."

Fanboy nodded and went in, only to come racing back out screaming. "Gah! It's Draken! And Alek! And Calublufiok! And Topsy! And some guy claiming to be my brother! They're all trying to kill me!"

"Oops... sorry about that. Darth Comet was here training last month. Let me just redo the settings." Nil said.

Fanboy went back in again, and came racing out even faster. "Bees! BEEEEEEES! Oh gods, get them off!"

Liriel rolled her eyes. "Put your glasses on, Nillie, that was the Darth Vespe setting." She recalibrated the cave, and Fanboy went in again.

A few minutes later, he came striding out, twirling his lightsabre.

"Well that's all done. Do I pass?" he asked.

"What do you mean?"

"I beat the Bath Vader sim. Honestly, that wasn't very scary at all. You should have stuck with the bees."

"Um, didn't you notice anything after you beheaded him?" Nil asked.

"Yeah. He didn't bleed. That's how I knew it was a sim. Also, I think we'd have noticed if an Imperial Star Destroyer had arrived in orbit."

Nil facepalms. "Stupid kid. You're supposed to fear turning to the Dark Side like your father did."

"My father did what now?"

"Er... hey, how about levitating some rocks or something?"

Suddenly Fanboy grabs his head and moans. "Than and Catmuffin--they are in terrible danger! I must go to them at once!"

Nil shrugs. "Eh, let them die. You didn't pass your final yet."

"Yeah, I'm thinking no," Fanboy said. "This is my sister we're talking about."

"Oh let him go, Nillie," Liriel said. "It's not like he's got the brains to learn anything else."

Fanboy and Artoodihan climbed into their ship, while Saint Nil Yoda and his wife Liriel beamed and waved.

"Have fun storming the Death Moon!"

"You think they're going to make it?" Liriel asked.

"It would take a miracle."

Enjoy! And comment! Please?

[randman22222]

Ship Wars

Episode V: The Empire Ships Back
Part 8

Starring:
FF Fanboy as Fanboy Skywalker
Doihaveaname? as Artoodihan
Deathslayer7 as Liriel
Saint Nil as Master Saint Nil Yoda

Mentioned:
Vespe Ratavo as Darth Vespe
Darkcomet as Darth Comet
Kaelaroth as Alek
Reinholdt as Calublufiok
Draken as Himself
Blue Umbrella as Topsy Kretts

(Full cast list and links to previous instalments here)

Spoiler

Show

"Okay! Training! What do I do first?"

"First, take off your shirt and start doing acrobatic stunts, like standing on one hand." Saint Nil Yoda said.

"Um, what for? How will that help me fight Bath Vader?"

"It won't. It's just for fanservice."

Meanwhile, Liriel and Artoodihan worked on repairing the ship.

"Is Nil planning on telling Fanboy who Bath Vader really is?" Artoodihan asked.

"Course not. That's for the climax of the film." Liriel said.

"Isn't it really irresponsible to send him off to war knowing that Bath Vader will certainly use this knowledge to try and turn him to the Dark Side?"

"I notice you haven't told him either." Liriel pointed out.

"Hey, what do you want? I already overrode the script once to keep him from snogging his sister. Got reprimanded for it too. I don't want to get fired." Artoo complained.

"Oh don't worry. I'm sure Bath will never figure out that the kid that shares his surname is related to him in any way."

***

"Now, Fanboy, Use the Force! Go the distance! Carpe diem! Win one for the gipper!" Saint Nil's inspirational platitudes went on for some time until Fanboy was all psyched up and ready to go.

"Now," Nil said. "Your final exam. Go into that creepy cave over there and face your worst fear."

Fanboy nodded and went in, only to come racing back out screaming. "Gah! It's Draken! And Alek! And Calublufiok! And Topsy! And some guy claiming to be my brother! They're all trying to kill me!"

"Oops... sorry about that. Darth Comet was here training last month. Let me just redo the settings." Nil said.

Fanboy went back in again, and came racing out even faster. "Bees! BEEEEEEES! Oh gods, get them off!"

Liriel rolled her eyes. "Put your glasses on, Nillie, that was the Darth Vespe setting." She recalibrated the cave, and Fanboy went in again.

A few minutes later, he came striding out, twirling his lightsabre.

"Well that's all done. Do I pass?" he asked.

"What do you mean?"

"I beat the Bath Vader sim. Honestly, that wasn't very scary at all. You should have stuck with the bees."

"Um, didn't you notice anything after you beheaded him?" Nil asked.

"Yeah. He didn't bleed. That's how I knew it was a sim. Also, I think we'd have noticed if an Imperial Star Destroyer had arrived in orbit."

Nil facepalms. "Stupid kid. You're supposed to fear turning to the Dark Side like your father did."

"My father did what now?"

"Er... hey, how about levitating some rocks or something?"

Suddenly Fanboy grabs his head and moans. "Than and Catmuffin--they are in terrible danger! I must go to them at once!"

Nil shrugs. "Eh, let them die. You didn't pass your final yet."

"Yeah, I'm thinking no," Fanboy said. "This is my sister we're talking about."

"Oh let him go, Nillie," Liriel said. "It's not like he's got the brains to learn anything else."

Fanboy and Artoodihan climbed into their ship, while Saint Nil Yoda and his wife Liriel beamed and waved.

"Have fun storming the Death Moon!"

"You think they're going to make it?" Liriel asked.

"It would take a miracle."

Enjoy! And comment! Please?

It needs a theme song. Something as funny.

[Raistlin1040]

Turtle, I LOVE Raistlin in Redemption. I think that's very close to what I would do in that situation.

[Cristo Meyers]

Be tempted!
Luckily, I'm going back to Mi'ir/Mordokai/Graf after this. They need a name or something.

"Oh God not them again!" ?

[Reinholdt]

@ Happy- Too much fun. Silly Darth Comet.
You know, in retrospect, if all those villains were actually trying to kill me, I'd run too.
Loved the link.
Hehe. Let them die.

Great work Happy.

[Dirk Kris]

Whisper, Part 12 starring Brandelle/Mordokai/SMEE/GW/RHL (mentioned)

Spoiler

Show

Brandelle and Mordokai slumbered together until late in the morning. Each dreamed, and for a time both smiled happily. But before long, Brandelle's dream twisted, changed.

She found herself in a modest home, bedridden. It was dark, lit only by a few candles. She felt her breath rattling in her chest, each inhalation a little more difficult than the last. Shadows clouded her eyes, but she had the sense she was not alone. The room was filled with an almost tangible love and devotion. He was there for her, her love, her life.

Brandelle reached blindly, the darkness, her weakness stealing her sight. She felt him take her hand and squeeze it gently, warm and large and comforting. His fingers ran gently through her hair, much longer and fairer than it was now.

“I love you. All my life, there’s been nothing I’ve loved so dearly. You have been, you remain, my queen and my goddess. You are my sole religion. I’ve wanted nothing else so much in this life as your favor, your love. That you would turn your eyes to me, choose me in turn to be your king and your god, your sole religion, is more than I could have ever asked of you. I hope I have been every wish fulfilled for you, as you have been for me.”

His voice broke. It was a long time before he was able to continue. Clearly he loved her, but something was wrong, different - it wasn't Mordokai's voice. Brandelle struggled to see, to tell him he was making a mistake, but in vain. She hadn't the strength to move or speak. Her head fell to the side as the man wept openly. A small mirror stood on the bedside table. She saw their reflections.

The man wasn't Mordokai - it was Ghost Warlock! And the woman in the mirror - was Smee! The ghostly woman haunting her! Mentally Brandelle recoiled, her mind tearing, trying to get some sound out, to escape this nightmare. Smee smiled wearily, her eyes locked on Ghost. Inside her head, Brandelle heard the all-too-familiar voice.

"I will not leave you, my love. I would never abandon you. Through the gates of hell, I will go, all to find a way back to you." There was a sputtering, a quiet cursing at her own weakness, then the voice was gone.

And, too, Brandelle felt herself slipping away, deeper, darker. She felt the touch of lips on her forehead, then felt no more...
-------------------------------
Brandelle woke, screaming, flailing. Mordokai pulled away, having gently kissed her forehead to try and rouse her. He grabbed her shoulders and spoke quietly, trying to calm her. "Brandelle! Be calm, dearest. Be calm. No harm will come to you - I am here." Almost immediately it worked. Brandelle looked around, sighed, and pressed her face against the paladin's chest. Mordokai smiled and stroked her hair. After a few moments he pulled away and cupped her chin in his hands. "Now, please tell me you won't act like this after every time we make love." Brandelle said nothing, only blushed. Mordokai chuckled and kissed her lips gently. She resisted at first, then threw herself into his arms and returned it. Mordokai, much as he was enjoying it, broke the contact after a time. "Come now, if we keep at this, we'll lose a whole day. Not that it would be all bad, mind you."

Used to obeying, Brandelle nodded and stood up to dress. Mordokai watched her for a while before getting up to don his armor, smiling all the while. Brandelle noticed, giddy with pleasure. "So, what're we doing?"

Mordokai suddenly became serious, solemn. "I, uh...I'm going to try and find Rabbit. We have matters to discuss."

Brandelle sucked in a sharp breath. "Do you really think that's the best idea, Mordokai? I mean, she tried to kill you the last time you were together."

Mordokai kept his eyes down, focusing on what he was doing. "You can come with me or stay here, as you please. I am not running off to bed her, if that's what you think."

Brandelle's cheeks blossomed with crimson, and she sat on the bed to watch him. "No, it's not that. I just...I don't want to lose you. And if something happened to you, I'd be all alone again. I couldn't bear it." Her lip trembled and her eyes filled with tears. "Can't you just forget about it and be happy with me?"

Mordokai sighed and came to kneel at Brandelle's feet. "Dearest." He cupped her cheek with his hand. "I care for you, truly, deeply. And the short time we have been together has been wonderful. I know not what powers brought us together, but I feel my goddess must intend for you to be with me. Sune is wise, and I would be a fool to doubt or challenge her. So, no, you will not be losing me." The paladin rested his forehead on her knee. "But I cannot forget Rabbit or what she did. I want to know why."

Brandelle reached down to caress the back of Mordokai's neck, exposed to her, so trusting. "Surely there are other things more deserving of your attentions? Some quest, grand and noble? Or does a more quiet, settled life call to you?"

Mordokai chuckled. "I go to wherever my goddess leads me."

Brandelle pulled away a little to look at him. "Well, didn't she lead you to me?"

Mordokai froze, his mouth trying to form words to reply with. She was right. But he needed to think, to commune with Sune, to get a direction. "I...look. I won't go after Rabbit. Here." He took her hand and led her to the window. He pointed into the distance, at a steeple and some stained glass. "I'm going to that cathedral to pray. I'll be back soon." Quickly he kissed her and headed out, leaving Brandelle alone in the room.

As silence settled around her, Brandelle sunk onto the bed to think and try to sort things out. The Ghost, Smee, Mordokai, Rabbit - it was all so overwhelming! She hid her face in her hands. How quickly she had gone from a simple serving girl to being caught up in this web that grew more tangled and sticky with every passing moment.

What was she going to do?

[TwoBitWriter]

I love my Dirky Whisper fics!

And I'm leaving work early today... I just can't be here right now...

But hopefully that means I can post something.

[Reinholdt]

@ Dirk - It was good. I hope she and Mordokai can get that elusive happy ending.

[Dallas-Dakota]

As a new ship sets sail.

Spoiler

Show

He watched from harbor, as a new ship, S.a.D. is launched into the waters. Thinking back to the previous ship his mind wanders.
Flashback
As they all finished the written version of the latest edition toIStLY, Dallas-Dakota's face turned grimmer.....It had been a bad day for him, one of tire, migraines and writer block's. He quickly fled to a wing of the ship. the IStLY wing. He quickly wrote in a new scene and looked at how it was. It was brilliant, devillish and it would completely ruin GW's latest edition.....Perfect... He quickly wrote it down on the computer and entered it into the system...He got his revenge.

What? I'm sorry mate, but writing just to ruin another's work....
I agree, you shouldn't do that.....Completely ruining another's work....
I'l not blame him, but it wasn't a good thing either.

Meanwhile Dallas was in his good rooms, one of the priviliges of being a regular shipper(And you should see Curly's rooms), thinking it over.
God....What have I done....How could I let myself get out of control that much...
He whispered to himselves as feelings of regret and hurt flew through his body fast then blood.
He was quickly planning...He had to get away....
But first..He should tell....And then Dallas went into the Hall of Fire, a relaxing big hall where most of the writers conspired and got their inspiration.
I'm sorry, just ignore it..Please, just ignore it, GW I'm so sorry..... I cannae think up a way to make up to you....So I regret to announce, that this is the end...I'm leaving.
Dallas quickly fled to hall while whispers where fluttering and went to the life-boats and took one....To flee....To be alone...


Sigh, he missed it...The jovial mood while drama unleashed, love unfolded and war killed. He saw writers moving into the new ship, with carts of dead and alive characters being pulled in after them by servants.
Maybe...With a new ship....A new chance?
He took one of his only possesions, a lapto with him and went to the roof, he had to think...Did he really want to be there....Could he stand to be there?
Sigh, nothing to loose, why not.
Dallas silently snuck in...trying to go unnoticed by all the others...Who he so dissapointed......Hopefully they would forgive him....

[Dirk Kris]

Dallas...

d'awwwwwwwwwwww!

That being said, I demand a ship from Cristo! With Brandi! And wubs!

[RabbitHoleLost]

Awww, DD, of course we'll forgive you <3
Its the Ship thread! We fall in love with eachother, argue, and then come back! Its the way of the Ship!

Dirkydirk: MmmMmmMmmm. I'm so lost as to what's going on in IStLY, I think my brain is going to a'splode.

[Cristo Meyers]

That being said, I demand a ship from Cristo! With Brandi! And wubs!

Cristo's retired

[ghost_warlock]

@Happy: Yay, fanservice! And BEEEEEEEES! Great video link, too. I think I like multimedia fics.

@Dirk: And so the identity of GW's wife and ZP's mom is finally revealed! And she's not happy about being killed off in the preludes! Spiff-irrif-fic! I wasn't sure where to put this one in the archive since a couple days or so have passed for GW, RHL, and some of the others since they last saw Mordy & Brandelle. I ended up listing it right after #11. ; hope that sounds right to you, too.

@D-D: Awwww... *hugs*

[Dallas-Dakota]

Awww, DD, of course we'll forgive you <3
Its the Ship thread! We fall in love with eachother, argue, and then come back! Its the way of the Ship!

Only happy to follow the way then.^^

@D-D: Awwww... *hugs*

*hugs* And by the way, that sentence really fits with your new avatar

[Reinholdt]

@ DD- We forgave you long ago Dallas, and we'll do it again now if you feel it's needed. Welcome back.

[Fredthefighter]

The next installment of Fred's return is in progress. Look out Nil, your brother in arms is back.

[happyturtle]

It needs a theme song. Something as funny.

The Ship Wars theme song.

[randman22222]

The Ship Wars theme song.

This is beautiful.

[Reinholdt]

The Ship Wars theme song.

I'm letting Happy choose all my theme songs from now on.

[Fredthefighter]

That is a cool song.
Forms line to get theme songs from Happy. Pwease.

[CurlyKitGirl]

The Ship Wars theme song.

That was amazing, and I second this as the theme tune of Ship Wars from now until forever.

[Deathslayer7]

sorry guys. This was a lag post. Shouldn't have been up.

full stroy below.

[Reinholdt]

@ deathslayer- LE GASP!! You dare oppose the standards set by spoiler tags and titles! ooooo.... I feel woozy. *collapses from the shock*

And a fairly interesting story too. Heh. TwoBit's been downgraded from daddy to son. Good job.

[Boo]

@Blue Umbrella: It...kind of bothers me that I understood almost all of Antony's crazy-talk.

Really? I was sure that code was unbreakable! Or at least too bothersome to read...

@everyone since I'm too lazy to go through names: Good work! *three thumbs up* Wait, where's that third one coming from? *looks down* GAH!

[Destro_Yersul]

I have a nasty creeping suspicion that that's set to be the next part in the Crazy Cristo series, and is not finished and has been posted prematurely. >.>

Should said suspicion prove to be accurate, I shall comment on it when it's finished.

@Happy: Yay! Ship Wars! I really do like this series, and the Princess Bride references for Nil are great.

[Deathslayer7]

Life on the Road

starring Dirk Kris, TwoBitWriter

Spoiler

Show

Dirk Kris tipped his hat as a fellow dropped a coin into the hat. It wasn't easy living this type of lifestyle, espcially with a kid. But TwobitWriter didn't mind all that much. He hummed along to his father's song while writing a poem on a piece of paper. He had just finished it.

He showed it to his father who had just finished his song as well. Dirk read it and smiled.

I watch you from afar, and everyday I see you,
Yet I wonder if today is the day,
I will have to courage to talk to you.
I listen when you talk,
I smile when you're happy,
But today shall be the day.
The day I tell you how I truly feel.

Nicely done Twobit. he said. Do you want to keep it?

Twobit shook his head and said No.

A man passed by in a rush, carrying flowers. Dirk grabbed him and pulled him closer. My good man. He said, speaking fast as he struggled to get out. How would you like a lovely poem for your lady? he asked showing him the poem.

The man read it over once and liked it. He pulled out a dollar and a candy bar.

This is all I have. he said.

Dirk nodded. It is a harsh time for everyone. he said, aceepting the offer. He handed the candy bar to Twobit. There is your lunch. he said, patting him on the head.

But what about you? asked Twobit.

Dirk shrugged. I'll be fine without lunch. he said, even though his stomach was grolwing quietly.

Twobit opened the candy bar, dead set on giving his father half of it, when he saw the ticket.

Father, what is this? he asked, holding it up.

Dirk looked at it and smiled. Our good fortune. he said. In a loud voice he cried out Golden ticket for aale! Golden ticket for sale!

A large group formed around him quickly, and hands were trying to grab it. Dirk tucked the ticket safely away into his pocket. He then explained. The person who puts the most money into this case will get the golden ticket. he said out loud.

With that, Twobit headed around to each person and wrote down the amount he or she put in. Dirk collected the money. After the process was finished, Dirk asked Twobit for the total. He smiled at the number.

He announced in a loud voice. The person who put the most money in this case, with an amount of $536.37 was....... The crowd leaned forward, anticipating, hoping it was them. Me!

The crowd grew angry. You were selling the ticket! they shouted.

Seeing as this is my case, it is my money. He closed the case and picked up his guitar. Evening folks. he said. They walked away, laughing, while the crowd was angry and shouting names at therm.

enjoy.

[Reinholdt]

@ deathslayer- You put up that preview just so they'd seem all nice and sweet, didn't you?
Well it worked. Cause I didn't see that one coming at all.
Good job.
Accursed trickster motif.

[Deathslayer7]

nah. that post was a lag post. shouldn't even have been posted at all. Thought i had stopped it in time.

@ HT: i liked it. *demands more*

[CurlyKitGirl]

And now, good sirs and ladies of the thread I present you with what has come before in:

Definition drabble

Outraged
Accentuate
Domicile
Alienist
Prolix
Dragoon
Ineffable
Golem
Jurisprudence
Definition - by Helgraf
Lothario
Exculpate
Touchstone
Prelapsarian
Remora
Kickshaw
Bifurcate
Simulacrum
Undulant
Wisenheimer
Conciliatory
Videlicet
Scapegrace
Sanguine - by Helgraf
Frieze
Zany
Frigorific
Aphorism
Tocsin
Imperative - Helgraf
Lollygag
Elysian
Candor
Sanction

And now:
Hidebound - having an inflexible or ultraconservative character

Spoiler

Show

He glared at his recalcitrant group; what were they doing? Worse than children they were, especially that one. He scuttled off again and again and what for? An interesting sight, a good fruit tree, being terrified of an insignificant spider . . .
The other one was just as bad. At least he had an excuse for it, being blessed by a god. Drifting wherever the land took him. One he’d had to rescue him from falling off a cliff because that daydreamer had followed the incline of the land to a drop.
”Loosen up silly paladin.”
It would be a long journey.