A Thread in Which Banter Most Random is Expulsed Into Existence, By Ravens_cry #142

[Archonic Energy]

A view from the other side - Vegetarianism*

*wonders*...

Heh.
"And not a word about this to Wendy."

*confirms*

That's the Mitchel & Webb Sketch... brilliant!
i posted that on my FB account... *glares at Ku*

[KuReshtin]

*wonders*...

*confirms*

That's the Mitchel & Webb Sketch... brilliant!
I posted that on my FB account... *glares at Ku*

I did say that I couldn't remember if it was from FaceBook or from here.


"Pigs are expensive, pink and annoying, but they're also delicious, and that's why we breed so many of them."

And speaking of pigs, apparently, the National Pork Board in the US lack a sense of humour, or in deed, lack the sense to see an April Fool's joke when one is presented to them.

Proof.

[Coidzor]

Yeah, see, Scorpina, I can see that, but I also see it as caring far too much.

Maybe I'm just lucky because my parents don't feel they have it together enough to start demanding grandchildren from my brothers and I. Or that my ex-fiance broke up with me and my older brother is an engineering grad student, so they're just being realistic.

[Archonic Energy]

"Pigs are expensive, pink and annoying, but they're also delicious, and that's why we breed so many of them."

And speaking of pigs, apparently, the National Pork Board in the US lack a sense of humour, or in deed, lack the sense to see an April Fool's joke when one is presented to them.

Proof.

i fancy a bacon roll now!

that's just too funny for words!
didn't these guys/gals read the link?

[Teddy]

But that actually decreases your chances of a clear majority. Okay, so maybe 10% say absolutely, 12% say yes and 29% say that they wouldn't say no, but then you get 49% who say that you should be torn into bloody pieces. That looks like a pretty clear majority to me.

Oh, but you throw number 1, 2 and 3 together in a cathegory called "this supports me", and present the results that way. You don't need to manipulate numbers as long as you know how to write the questions and present the result. Ambiguity and some word-twisting can take you far, as long as the audience consists of the morons that most people seem to be when faced with statistics.

One easy way of tiping the balance to your favour is to make it seem evil to give the most negative answer. That way, people are prone to move themselves a step upwards, and thus answer the way you want them to.

[SDF]

I was at my parents house today watching Daily Show internet archives with my dad when my mom bursts in says my brother broke his ankle longboarding in the foothills and is at the hospital. They take off... My brother hurt himself the first time he went getting a really bloody knee and elbow. The next time after he spent like $200 on equipment he bruises his femur, scrapes his knee arm, and head. Now he breaks his ankle and maybe more.

List of people that should not be longboarding in the gorram foothills: SDF's brother.

[Phase]

Phase's Phun Phacts!

- Once one has ≥30 mosquito bites, they stop thinking in anything but curses.
- Mosquitoes, when microwaved, smell terrible. Like, really super bad. I can't even... gods, so terrible.
-Mosquitoes, when electrocuted in such a manner as to burn them to a smoky crisp, actually smell kinda nice...
- Best toy ever:

[Nano]

List of people that should not be longboarding in the gorram foothills: SDF's brother.

It seems like this list should be longer. Who else can we add?

[Jokasti]

Mosquitoes on the mind, eh?

Spoiler

Show

SWAT THEM. SWAT THE MIND, I DON'T EVEN CARE ANYMORE, JUST KILL THEM ALL!

[UglyPanda]

Horrible insect-related injury is part of Phase's horrible insect-related job, I believe.

I have an electric fly swatter myself. It was made in China, so it's probably broken already. They're really popular in Hong Kong for reasons I'm not entirely sure of.

[Cealocanth]

I have an electric fly swatter myself. It was made in China, so it's probably broken already. They're really popular in Hong Kong for reasons I'm not entirely sure of.

I have an electric fly swatter too. The cheap ones last about a week, then die. Good for one shot tries at camping events that are really buggy. I think they might be popular because of the mini thunderclap they produce when a bug is swatted, it's quite amusing.

[Nomrom]

Also, it's fun to hit other people with the electric fly swatter.

[Terumitsu]

It looks like a tennis racket..

Hmm..

Electric tennis anyone? Heck, what would the rules even be for a game like that? Something between Don't Touch the Lava (Electrified floor, obviously) and dodgeball (Especially if someone managed to find a way to use St. Ulmo's Fire (Hope I spelled that right) as the ball) perhaps?

[Player_Zero]

You try to scream. You can't scream. Accelerator freeze your scream. All jutting out you mouth in a vector tangle.

Now. Did anyone understand that? Anyone at all?

[absolmorph]

I think I may have some fun with chemistry when school starts again.
Specifically, talking to people about the dangers of hydroxylic acid and asking them if they think it should be banned.

[Quincunx]

You try to scream. You can't scream. Accelerator freeze your scream. All jutting out you mouth in a vector tangle.

Now. Did anyone understand that? Anyone at all?

Differential equation showing the vectors of a scream as it exits the mouth.
A train enters a tunnel at the speed of light.
A train enters Gabriel's Horn at the speed of light.
Too many prions, not enough bosons.

[Teddy]

It looks like a tennis racket..

Hmm..

Electric tennis anyone? Heck, what would the rules even be for a game like that? Something between Don't Touch the Lava (Electrified floor, obviously) and dodgeball (Especially if someone managed to find a way to use St. Ulmo's Fire (Hope I spelled that right) as the ball) perhaps?

Oh, I think that a ball lightning would result in a much more entertaining game. Imagine it changing direction midair and come back at the player who just swatted it.

BTW, it's spelled St. Elmo's Fire, just so you know.

I think I may have some fun with chemistry when school starts again.
Specifically, talking to people about the dangers of hydroxylic acid and asking them if they think it should be banned.

Don't forget to warn them of the dangers of dioxide. It's capable of destroying your body from the inside upon inhalation, something which can only be prevented through life-long medication.

[Archonic Energy]

Also, it's fun to hit other people with the electric fly swatter.

i remember when we* sold them, I was dared to shock my tounge...
it hurt, ALOT!
but it netted me a tenner
*sigh*
good days

* we being the shop i used to work for.

[Dragonrider]

My six-year-old brother is running around in shorts that are size 24 months. They are too short for him, but they fit him in the waist.

...I think maybe this kid needs to put on some weight.

[Kobold-Bard]

Just watched Zombieland, and I loved it. That's my kind of apocalypse

[Gwyn chan 'r Gwyll]

Just watched Zombieland, and I loved it. That's my kind of apocalypse

Great movie!

[Coidzor]

My six-year-old brother is running around in shorts that are size 24 months. They are too short for him, but they fit him in the waist.

...I think maybe this kid needs to put on some weight.

You should make him a sammich.

Failing that, I think you could make him into a sammich without too much trouble at that size.

[Scorpina]

Just watched Zombieland, and I loved it. That's my kind of apocalypse

It is incredibly awesome.

[Dallas-Dakota]

Uber-awesome.

I think I've watched it a couple of dozen times now.

[Kobold-Bard]

And the tennis has been suspended after 10 hours and 59-59 in the final Set.

10. Freaking. Hours!!

They both look like they're about to implode. They'll be lucky if they wake up for tomorrow's match.

[Neko Toast]

My friend just had to decide whether or not he should put his dog down. He decided against euthanasia, and instead built him a special pen in his basement so that he can be more comfortable.

That's a tough decision to face. I think he made the right choice, both for the dog and for him. He says he never really knew how much he loved his dog until he was faced with losing him, so now he'll have time to really appreciate him before he passes away.

I kind of envy that, in a way. Back in the fall, my mom called me saying that they had already put down my cat because of kidney problems. I had taken her for granted, and then she was gone. It was a terrible feeling.

So, yeah. It's been a rough week. :( I'm worried about him.

[Nomrom]

i remember when we* sold them, I was dared to shock my tounge...
it hurt, ALOT!
but it netted me a tenner
*sigh*
good days

* we being the shop i used to work for.

Never done the tongue before. We usually just went for the elbow, or the knee if they were sitting down.

[SDF]

So I just spent the last day and a half at the hospital. My little bro got some pretty major surgery. His tibia and fibula were smashed, no clean cut. There were clots and lots of tissue damage. Luckily he is slated to make a full recovery, sometime around the end of summer. He was a day away from getting his driving permit and now lost his job. Poor kid...

But he's okay and that's all that matters. That, and he can't chase me down when I come over and steal a yogurt.

[Zeb The Troll]

Okay, wow, that sucks, SDF. I thought Grandtroll had a bad weekend. He's 3 years old and broke his left femur. Poor guy's in cast that goes from his left toes up around his waist and the doc's have him on oxycodone for the pain. But at least it was a clean break and didn't require surgery. And he's young so he's expected to be back to normal much more quickly than I would be if I'd done the same thing.

Okay, he did have a bad weekend. Just not as bad as your brother's was. Many well wishes for a speedy and uneventful recovery for him.

[Anuan]

Broken bones?

My cousin (of sorts) was in a mining accident that involved having both legs and arms crushed, broken ribs and I'm pretty sure a cracked skull.

Unpleasantness all round, really.