Things I May No Longer Do While Playing II: Stop Making The DM Cry

[Qwertystop]

1754: I cannot use Greater Magic Weapon on a Mimic disguised as a longsword to make a +5 Mimic.

1754a: Nor can I use it to check every weapon in case it is a mimic.

[Chookster]

1755: a dungeon made entirely out of mimics is an enemy to defeat, not a resource to utilise

[kaomera]

1754b: No longer allowed to use this thread as a resource for designing BBEGs.

[Velaryon]

You've just given me a great idea for an "innocent" old Cat Lady NPC.

Oh my. This is an astounding idea, and I just may have to borrow it from you. Do you mind?

[Ksheep]

1758: Control Weather cannot be used to make Chocolate Rain.

1759: Casting Water to Acid on a Fog Cloud is generally frowned upon.

1759A: Especially when party members are in said fog cloud.

EDIT: Fixed numbering

[Silverscale]

Oh my. This is an astounding idea, and I just may have to borrow it from you. Do you mind?

By all means but please let us know how it works out.

[AtlanteanTroll]

All posts after mine on the last page are incorrectly numbered. The next number should be 1760.

[Ksheep]

All posts after mine on the last page are incorrectly numbered. The next number should be 1760.

Thanks for that catch, fixed the numbering on mine…

[Kymme]

1760. My epic warlock is never allowed to have this conversation
NPC: Well, you're a freak
Warlock: *casts baeful polymorph*
Warlock: Well, you're a sheep
:P

[Dimonite]

1761: If a hippogriff is carrying off my necromancer friend, I am not allowed to throw the druid's snow leopard at it.

[Dragonsoul]

1657: When I cast Otto's Irresistible Dance on the BBEG, I may not make him do the Caramelldansen dance.

1657a- The same goes for pixies against Player characters

[vegetalss4]

1761: If a hippogriff is carrying off my necromancer friend, I am not allowed to throw the druid's snow leopard at it.

1761a: the same goes for any other combination of allies, flying monsters and animal companions/familiars or mounts.

[BlackestOfMages]

1761a: the same goes for any other combination of allies, flying monsters and animal companions/familiars or mounts.

1671b: though not familiars. they're effectivly living ammo
1671c: Especially if they're a lantern archon celestial familiar

[Mono Vertigo]

1762: quantum physics don't apply to my alignment. It doesn't change every time someone is observing it.

[Ksheep]

1763: Mr. Bean is not a valid character concept.
1763B: This goes double when trying to make a Psion.

[Hiro Protagonest]

1764. Red Green is not a valid character concept.
1764a. Especially if I score high enough on the craft check that my inventions actually work.

1765. There is no such thing as a Tunic of Holding.
1765a. Or Overalls of Holding.
1765b. Especially not if they're called Bill's Overalls of Holding.

1766. No Red Green jokes.

[Alabenson]

1767: The following are not appropriate deity choices for my PC; Nightmare Moon, Discord, Lauren Faust.
1767b: Princess Celestia / Princess Luna are still fine though.

[Hiro Protagonest]

1767: The following are not appropriate deity choices for my PC; Nightmare Moon, Discord, Lauren Faust.
1767b: Princess Celestia / Princess Luna are still fine though.

1767c. I will not point out the paradox of being able to worship Luna but not Nightmare Moon.

[Vknight]

1768) Wearing a former villains face as a preserved mask does not give me a bonus to disguise checks.

[jindra34]

1768.B. It does however grant a bonus to intimidate against his/her former minions.

[eulmanis12]

1762 under no circumstances am I to list "Planet" as my preferred sidearm

1763 if I play a wizard with access to teleport I am not permitted to defeat enemies by teleporting them to locations including but not limited to:
Vats of acid
off cliffs
the inside of a solid boulder
the stomach of the nearest dragon
the stomach of the furthest dragon
my bag of holding.
and active volcano
the bottom of the ocean/off the ship if they're wearing armor

[Morithias]

1762 under no circumstances am I to list "Planet" as my preferred sidearm

1763 if I play a wizard with access to teleport I am not permitted to defeat enemies by teleporting them to locations including but not limited to:
Vats of acid
off cliffs
the inside of a solid boulder
the stomach of the nearest dragon
the stomach of the furthest dragon
my bag of holding.
and active volcano
the bottom of the ocean/off the ship if they're wearing armor

Although I will admit you don't get a saving throw against teleport from what I can see. I would like to point out that it ALWAYS brings the caster along therefore killing you too.

[noparlpf]

Although I will admit you don't get a saving throw against teleport from what I can see. I would like to point out that it ALWAYS brings the caster along therefore killing you too.

I saw a suicide kill once when the mage took out the boss monster by teleporting it somewhere lethal. We were losing pretty badly, and I guess he was good-aligned?

[BlackestOfMages]

nope, still dosen't work. the people coming along need to be willing

[hydroplatypus]

Although I will admit you don't get a saving throw against teleport from what I can see. I would like to point out that it ALWAYS brings the caster along therefore killing you too.

Well, if 2 teleport spells are prepared, you could teleport away from wherever you teleport to. ex. teleport into vat of acid, take 1 round acid damage, teleport away.

[Ksheep]

nope, still dosen't work. the people coming along need to be willing

Dominate the person before casting teleport, perhaps?

Also, for the whole "you'll be effected too" argument, it's not that hard to get some means of fire resistance before dropping them in a volcano, and it's even easier if they are armored: teleport above the ocean and teleport away again before you hit the water. They are now (probably) drowning and miles away from the shore.

[eulmanis12]

I'm an idiot!

That thing with the teleports was specifically house ruled in.

It goes like this,
Can teleport objects/people without teleporting self.
If the person/people are unwilling they must pass a will save or you teleport them.

[Foeofthelance]

1764: No longer allowed to escalate in-game seduction races to the point of multichapter fanfics.

[Dimonite]

1765: I am not allowed to use Handle Animal to seduce a snake-woman.
1766: I am not allowed to play a venerable-age, free-willed undead who will use a subtle mix of diplomacy and mind-control to convince the party paladin to use the leadership feat to collect enough followers to raise me to godhood.

[noparlpf]

1765: I am not allowed to use Handle Animal to seduce a snake-woman.

Of course not, because her Int is presumably above 2.