Favorite Quotes

[horngeek]

"Your fangs will never reach me. Ever."

and later

"Looks like your fangs did reach me after all"

Byakuya, from Bleach.

[the HZ]

"Certainly, master! As you wish, master! Without doubt, master!
I'm sorry but I have to maim you now, master!"
-Dre 10, robot with erratic beta personality.

It's a quote from the rulebook of Mutant, a Swedish RPG.

[McMindflayer]

So, I did a quick search on the forums and found not one quotes page in it. Now I am a collector of quotes. I find them both amusing and gratifying. and I want to both share my quotes with others and find more, and thus I am starting this thread. Hopeing to garner more quotes for my 49 page collection.

I shall start of this thread with some of the best(in my opinion) quotes in my collection.
“A little rudeness and disrespect can elevate a meaningless intraction to a battle of wills and add drama to an otherwise dull day.” –Calvin and Hobbes (August 8, 1992)

“When you think how well basic appliances work, it’s hard to believe anyone ever gets on an airplane” – Calvin, after having is toast burned. (Calvin and hobbes, Sept. 15, 1992)

“At night, my mind does not much care
If what it thinks is here or there
It tell me stories it invents
And makes things that don’t make sense
I don’t know why it does this stuff
The real world seems quite weird enough.”
-Calvin and Hobbes collection

“It takes me more than one recess to wear myself into a state of submission.” Calvin and Hobbes (Oct. 28, 1992)

“Today for show and tell, I’ve brought a tiny marvel of natures: A single snowflake. I think we might learn a lesson from how this utterly unique and exquisite crystal turns into an ordinary boring molecule of water just like every other one when you bring it in the classroom.” – Calvin and Hobbes (Feb. 4, 1993)

“As you can see, I’ve memorized this utterly useless fact long enough to pass a test question. I now intend to forget it forever. You’ve taught me nothing except how to cynically manipulate the system. Congratulations” Calvin and Hobbes Collection

“I’m significant! … Screamed the dust speck.” Calvin and Hobbes Collections

“Virtue isn’t better than Vice, it’s just different.” – Calvin and Hobbes

“Why does man create? Is it man’s purpose on earth to express himself. To bring form to thought and to discover meaning in experiences. Or is it just something to do when he’s bored?” – Calvin and Hobbes

“I have no opposition! My will is Law! I am omnipotent!
… How boring.” – Calvin and Hobbes

“I keep two magnums in my desk. One’s a gun and I keep it loaded. The other’s a bottle, and it keeps me loaded.” – Tracer Bullet (Calvin and Hobbes collection)

“I decided to write a new ending with my .45 automatic as my co-author”

“I introduced the dame to a friend who’s very close to my heart. Just a little down and left to be specific. My friend is an eloquent speaker. He made three profound arguments while I excused myself from the room. I always leave when the talk gets philosophical.” – Tracer Bullet (Calvin and Hobbes collection)

“I kind of resent the manufacturers implicit assumption that this would amuse me” - Calvin when playing with a toy (Calvin and Hobbes Collection)

“I suppose if we couldn’t laugh at things that don’t make sense, we couldn’t react to a lot of life.” – Hobbes
”I can’t tell if that’s funny or really scary” – Calvin (Calvin and Hobbes Collection)

[Roland St. Jude]

A witty saying proves nothing. ~Voltaire

Action is eloquence. ~Shakespeare

It is better to be quotable than to be honest. ~Tom Stoppard

Quoting: the act of repeating erroneously the words of another. ~Ambrose Bierce

[Boo]

Never bothered with these topics. May as well start with some names, eh?

Words build bridges into unexplored regions.
~ Adolf Hitler

Adults are obsolete children.
~ Theodore Geisel (Dr. Seuss)

I have a problem when people say something's real or not real, or normal or abnormal. The meaning of those words for me is very personal and subjective. I've always been confused and never had a clearcut understanding of the meaning of those kinds of words.
~ Tim Burton

I have become afflicted with that dread disease, rare but terrible... a malformation... My head and face are gradually assuming an elongated shape. I believe fully that I am growing to resemble the devil - that the similitude is almost completed.
~ Herman Webster Mudgett (H. H. Holmes)

One day men will look back and say i gave birth to the twentieth century.
~ Jack the Ripper

What will I be doing in twenty years' time? I'll be dead, darling! Are you crazy?
~ Freddie Mercury

Last one...

The hardest job kids face today is learning good manners without seeing any.
~ Fred Astaire

[13_CBS]

"We weep at the cry of the hawk, but not at the blood of a fish. Blessed are those with voice."
- Motoko Kusanagi

These words have stayed with me ever since I first read them. Thus, I've tried to listen to the down trodden, those whose voices are ignored or lost.

[Don Julio Anejo]

"Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar"
- Sigmund Freud

"The death of one person is a tragedy, the death of a million is a statistic."
- Joseph Stalin

"All the world's a stage,
And all the men and women merely players;
They have their exits and their entrances,
And one man in his time plays many parts,
His acts being seven ages."
- Jaques (from As You Like It by William Shakespeare)

Don't know the source of this one, found it on a humour site. Translated from Russian.
"Success is closely tied to honesty and decency. If you lack those qualities, success is guaranteed."

"Give a man a fish, you feed him for a day. Teach him to fish, you feed him for a lifetime."
I think we all know where this one came from.

[Zeb The Troll]

There is an existing thread with this express purpose already in progress.

It is labeled Favorite Quotes, is merely on Page 3, and is only two and a half weeks since the last post.

[AmberVael]

Quoting: the act of repeating erroneously the words of another. ~Ambrose Bierce

Ah, Bierce. My favorite cynic.
Speaking of which...

"CYNIC, n. A blackguard whose faulty vision sees things as they are, not as they ought to be."
-Ambrose Bierce

[randman22222]

Ah, Bierce. My favorite cynic.
Speaking of which...

"CYNIC, n. A blackguard whose faulty vision sees things as they are, not as they ought to be."
-Ambrose Bierce

I like that quote.

[Murska]

"Give a man a fish, you feed him for a day. Teach him to fish, you feed him for a lifetime."

"Give a man a fire, and you keep him warm for a day. Set the man on fire, and he will be warm for his whole lifetime."

[Graymayre]

Always be on the lookout for the obvious -unknown

We must believe in free will. We have no choice. -Issac B. Singer

'What we've learned from history is that man has never learned from history' -Hegel

[Toastkart]

A few of my recent favourites.

“The Rat is the one who betrays humanity by institutionalizing, so much as possible, a death so white that it can no longer be distinguished from life.” ~ Frederick J. Wertz (The Rat in Psychological Science)

“For a more serious example, that all men die is a truth; and to say that such and such a percentage die at such and such ages gives a statistical accuracy to the proposition. But neither of these statements says anything about the fact which really matters most to each of us—namely, that you and I must alone face the fact that at some unknown moment in the future we shall die.” ~ Rollo May (The Discovery of Being)

“The family’s function is to repress Eros; to induce a false sense of security; to deny death by avoiding life; to cut off transcendence; to believe in God; not to experience the Void; to create, in short, one-dimensional man; to promote respect, conformity, obedience; to con children out of play; to induce a fear of failure; to promote a respect for work; to promote a respect for ‘respectability.’” ~ R.D. Laing (The Mystification of Experience)

“Human experience does not lend itself to the authoritative claims of either religion or science.” ~ Alan Bullock (The Humanist Tradition in the West)

"Freedom is but the negative aspect of the whole phenomenon whose positive aspect is responsibleness. In fact, freedom is in danger of degenerating into mere arbitrariness unless it is lived in terms of responsibleness." -Viktor Frankl(Man's Search for Meaning)

[zeratul]

Our myths are steeped in blood and tragedy and the grim acceptance of fate. The difference between these myths and the lessons they teach us and the modern day are virtually non existent. A man's life, decided by the warmongers, by the blade of a knife, a bullet from a gun or a bomb is no different from the warmongers and warriors of legend. We write our own legends today, here and now, yet always with blood.~ A.A. Nemtheanga

It gladdens me to know that Balder’s father makes ready the benches for a banquet. Soon we shall be drinking ale from the curved horns. The champion who comes into Odin’s dwelling does not lament his death. I shall not enter his hall with words of fear upon my lips. The Æsir will welcome me. Death comes without lamenting… Eager am I to depart. The Dísir summon me home, those whom Odin sends for me from the halls of the Lord of Hosts. Gladly shall I drink ale in the high-seat with the Æsir. The days of my life are ended. I laugh as I die. ~ The death song of Ragnar Lodbrok from norse legend

[Grey Paladin]

The most merciful thing in the world, I think, is the inability of the human mind to correlate all its contents. We live on a placid island of ignorance in the midst of black seas of infinity, and it was not meant that we should voyage far. The sciences, each straining in its own direction, have hitherto harmed us little; but some day the piecing together of dissociated knowledge will open up such terrifying vistas of reality, and of our frightful position therein, that we shall either go mad from the revelation or flee from the light into the peace and safety of a new dark age. - H.P.Lovecraft


All men dream, but not equally. Those who dream by night in the dusty recesses of their minds wake in the day to find that it was vanity; but the dreamers of the day are dangerous men, for they may act their dream with open eyes to make it possible. - T.E. Lawrence


But we were born of risen apes, not fallen angels, and the apes were armed killers besides. And so what shall we wonder at? Our murders and massacres and missiles, and our irreconcilable regiments? Or our treaties whatever they may be worth; our symphonies however seldom they may be played; our peaceful acres, however frequently they may be converted into battlefields; our dreams however rarely they may be accomplished. The miracle of man is not how far he has sunk but how magnificently he has risen. We are known among the stars by our poems, not our corpses. — Robert Ardrey


Bowmen, when they need to use their bows, they bend them. When they are not using their bows they loosen them, for if they were taunt all the time they would snap and so would not be of any use when they needed to use them. Such is the state of man also, for if he wanted to be serious all the time, and did not relax himself sometimes with a game he would go mad or out of his mind. I, knowing this, allocate a proportion of my time to both. - Amasis, King of Egypt, replying to the accusation that he is too frivolous and should be a more serious ruler. - Heroditus


It is not the critic who counts, not the man who points out how the strong man stumbled, or where the doer of deeds could have done better. The credit belongs to the man who is in the arena; whose face is marred by the dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs and comes short again and again; who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions and spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best, knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who, at worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly; so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat. - Theodore Roosevelt

[anazopyreo]

The best way to foretell the future is to create it.

[Berserk Monk]

"Nothing bad ever happens to the Kennedies!"

"Unexceptable? Did you see the pool? They flipped the bitch!"

-Clone High

Man, I miss that show.

[tribble]

how fortunate for dictators that men do not think.
-Adolf Hitler.

With Great Power, comes Great Responsibility.
-Stan Lee

The thing about words is that meaning can twist just like a snake, and if you want to find snakes look for them behind words that have changed their meaning.
-Terry Pratchett

[Lupy]

"It is better to live a day as a lion than a hundred years as a lamb." - Italian Proverb

"It is better to be feared and obeyed than loved and not." - Niccolo Machiavelli

"Do unto others as you would have them do unto you." - The Golden Rule

[Surfing HalfOrc]

Cuius testiculos habes, habeas cardia et cerebellum

And you don't even need to take Latin to figure out what it means.

[Katrascythe]

“Enemies are so stimulating.” - Katharine Hepburn

“If you always do what interests you, at least one person is pleased.” - Katharine Hepburn

I love that woman...

[Anuan]

"You can be a murderous tyrant and the world will remember you fondly, but *bleep* one horse and you'll be a horse *bleep*er forever"
Catherine the Great.

"Never fight ugly people, they have nothing to lose."
Keychain

[Llama231]

My personal favorite:

"You, my friend, are one plum short of a prune pie."

[Dogmantra]

"Oh no, not again" - The last thoughts of a falling bowl of petunias.

"I checked it very thoroughly, and that quite definitely is rhe answer.I think the problem, to be quite honest with you, is that you've never actually known what the question is." - Deep Thought

"The officer's next point was that I wasn't in the universe. I was in England"

"This is a well known hazard for writers, and the correct response to the question is to first breathe deeply, steady your heartbeat, fill your mind with peaceful, calming images of birdsong and buttercups in spring meadows, and then say 'Well, it's very interesting you ask that...' before breaking down and starting to whimper uncontrollably."

All from Douglas Adams.

EDIT:
"My baby kisses like a
Ghost ship!
I touched my baby on her
Ghost ship!"
"Where exactly is a woman's 'ghost ship'?"
"Don't you know?" - Ghost Ship, Tripod.

[Rutskarn]

"The death of one person is a tragedy, the death of a million is a statistic."
- Joseph Stalin

It's a bird!

It's a plane!

It's...

CAPTAIN MINUTIAE!

Stalin actually never said that. In fact, it probably originated from an unrelated novel, Der schwarze Obelisk (The Black Obelisk).

[InaVegt]

"Through clever and constant application of propaganda, people can be made to see paradise as hell, and also the other way around, to consider the most wretched sort of life as paradise." -- Adolf Hitler

"The masses have little time to think. And how incredible is the willingness of modern man to believe." -- Benito Mussolini

[DraPrime]

"Do unto others as you would have them do unto you." - The Golden Rule

I believe that Jesus Christ said that one, not some guy who's called The Golden Rule.

Anyways, my favorite quotes:

"Non-conformists hate conformists for not conforming to non-conformity." - Unknown

"Honor means nothing more than prickly infantile vanity dressed up, usually, in desperate class-consciousness. Of all the symptoms of a weak ego, honor is the most embarrassing, and the most harmful. In a right-minded society it would be made a capital offense." - Fred Reed

[InaVegt]

I believe that Jesus Christ said that one, not some guy who's called The Golden Rule.

Well, to be more accurate, it's a rule/philosophy that's more or less represented in every religion and moral system in the world, so pinning it down to a single person would be unfair, which is why it's called "The Golden Rule".

[Lupy]

Actually, Jesus never said that, it's a misquote. You can google the verses for yourself.

Back on topic:

"Badass. *dons crown* Really Badass." - Xykon

[Rutskarn]

"You can be a murderous tyrant and the world will remember you fondly, but *bleep* one horse and you'll be a horse *bleep*er forever"
Catherine the Great.

Wait, seriously?

...

Seriously.

Okay, I've posted two responses and no actual quotes. Time to rectify that.

From the excellent film Nicholas and Alexandra

Rasputin: I can't leave. I want to serve Batushka and Matushka. I want peace, and food for peasants everywhere. I want that girl you you saw. And all the girls I haven't seen. I want to sleep, but can't sleep unless I'm drunk. I want to die and go to heaven. I want music. I want God to love me and I want to see YOU dance. Ha ha ha!