The Kiwi's Kinkily Knotted and Kookily Kickass Random Banter #114

[Phase]

Strength 3! There are tiny animals with more strength than that. Housecats have more strength than that.

Meh. I'm weak, despite my size. These are base stats, you see. I think I'd have a size modifier in there for strength.

Oh, and DEX was a typo, it should be 7.

[Fredthefighter]

Meh. I'm weak, despite my size. These are base stats, you see. I think I'd have a size modifier in there for strength.

Oh, and DEX was a typo, it should be 7.

I mean, I'm not the strongest guy in the world but even I have a Str of 11, even if I am only 5ft tall. (I count myself as small size, therefore +1 AC, +1AB, +4 Hide bonus)

[Kaelaroth]

Huh. I didn't even answer my own question. For note, dudettes, I have a BMI of 14.5 or so.
And I don't know what my stats would be.

[Phase]

I mean, I'm not the strongest guy in the world but even I have a Str of 11, even if I am only 5ft tall. (I count myself as small size, therefore +1 AC, +1AB, +4 Hide bonus)

Ahh. Hmm. I havn't played DnD in a couple of years, and even then I was a very... WARPED homebrew. Ah well. DEX still seven, STR 10. That seems resonable.

But, to get out of this knitty gritty talk, I will change the subject.

Sunglasses, indoors, outdoors, at night?
You decide.

[Kaelaroth]

Sunglasses are bad inside. V. bad. V. bad. Hyus. Outside, whatever the ambience, they're OK.

[Fredthefighter]

Ahh. Hmm. I havn't played DnD in a couple of years, and even then I was a very... WARPED homebrew. Ah well. DEX still seven, STR 10. That seems resonable.

But, to get out of this knitty gritty talk, I will change the subject.

Sunglasses, indoors, outdoors, at night?
You decide.

Sunglasses: For when you want to look cool
Indoors: Unless you plan on looking cool, do not do this.
Outdoors: Perfect
At night: Now you're just being stupid. *Smacks upside the head*

[Phase]

Sunglasses: For when you want to look cool
Indoors: Unless you plan on looking cool, do not do this.
Outdoors: Perfect
At night: Now you're just being stupid. *Smacks upside the head*

Oh really?

Because I wear my sunglasses at night.

This pop culture reference brought to you by the letter "cool".

[UncleWolf]

At night: Now you're just being stupid. *Smacks upside the head*

What about this?
(only the Blues Brothers scene)

[CurlyKitGirl]

I return from singing Haydn's Mass in B-flat Major. It's amazing.

I'd decided to wait until I'd listened to it to comment on this. I waited. I listened. I have declared it, and you, as awesome in the non - popular useage also. And generally awesome using the popular sense as well.

Well Beowulf is undoubtedly mixed with Christian influences, no? There's at least one academically famous reading of Beowulf as a Christ figure, and even if that is merely superimposed ideology, the shadings are distinct. And the oral-formulaic elements in the text make it pretty indisputable that the story was much older than its written fossilization and came recycled from a culture of primal orality.

I know, that's why I said assuming it was orally invented after 572AD or heavily influenced afterwards. It just depends on rough spread of Christianity because it was the official reliion of the Roman Empire from c. 330AD onwards, so undoubtedly Christian in some aspects.
The oral structure was one of the reasons I said to Wolfbane that it was similar the the Greek epics, and there are other similarities.
But being only a (UK) college student I've not had much time or ability to hunt down all these famous readings of texts that I love/admire and I also think that at this point I wouldn't be able to fully understand them.

The pronunciation of Anglo-Saxon is reconstructed, sure, but I find it credible. Shouldn't be difficult, and if someone is going to aggrandize themselves by reading it aloud, they'd better know the details.

If Grendel's mother is the Magdalene, do you see a Madonna in the text?

Oh it's definitely credible as a recontruction, and I know for the Indo - European pronounciation they do have some unknown phonemes which are . . . given names, just can't recall what at the moment. But there's actually a study going into working out how they should be pronounced.
I find it amazing that we can backtrack languages and still figure out fairly credibly how they could be pronounced!
Twelve supergroups and they're being narrowed down to what may be the original language. I love linguistics!
Hehe, Grendel's mother as Magdalene. I like that analogy, and it shall be stolen. I don't know if there's a Mary in the poem, it's been a very long time.

Hey, you like Paradise Lost, don't you Curly? The Anglo-Saxon Genesis reputedly by Caedmon has a very similar Satan, all rascally and charming and anti-heroish.

Yes, yes I do like Paradise Lost; need to finish that, stupid coursework made me misplace it halfway through Book Four. And I shall seek out this Anglo - Saxon Genesis you speak of, sounds good.


DnD?
I dunno.
All I know is that most people would say my INT would be 18.

[Dallas-Dakota]

Reina is, according to the laws of internet families.

The bramble says so.

[Rutskarn]

You forgot the best example of all.

Anna Navarre: You're wearing sunglasses on a night operation?
JC Denton: My vision is augmented.

[Recaiden]

I don't know what you're talking about. I wear my Sunglasses at night, especially in the desert. Indoors, not so much.

[Kaelaroth]

DnD?
I dunno.
All I know is that most people would say my INT would be 18.

And you'd have high Wisdom too.

[Coidzor]

...Phase is going to pull a Majora's mask and inflict massive Falling Damage upon us all?

...I woke up too early today, eh? I wonder if I should rectify this by slamming my face repeatedly into the desk... yeah, that might work...

So, I just got a man's crotch shoved into my face last night and threatened with a chopping knife if I didn't tell him that it looked like a woman's.

So, phase, whenever you're ready to crush us all, just lemme know where so I can be underneath.

Hmm... Sexy, but not sexy enough, the thought of the discovery of one Ur-Tongue...

[UncleWolf]

So, I just got a man's crotch shoved into my face last night and threatened with a chopping knife if I didn't tell him that it looked like a woman's.

Wait...what?

[Rutskarn]

So, phase, whenever you're ready to crush us all, just lemme know where so I can be underneath.

Don't let the MOOO-OOON come DOWN on ME...

Although ah SEARCH MAHSELF, there's always something else ah SEEEE...

[Player_Zero]

You forgot the best example of all.

Sunglasses? On a night mission?

Spoiler

Show

P.S. All the cool cats have intelligence in the twenties and a wisdom of four.

[Phase]

...Phase is going to pull a Majora's mask and inflict massive Falling Damage upon us all?

So, Phase, whenever you're ready to crush us all, just lemme know where so I can be underneath.

Hmm...

The Pyramids of Giza, they've had it too good for too long. But really, you should be pretty much anywhere from southern Europe to India to the Congo and I'd probably hit you directly. Everyone else? Vaporized from the massive impact. It'd be like the Permian extinction, but a lot worse.

[Rutskarn]

Spoiler

Show

Okay, see, this is good. This is confirmation.

Now I know that you're out to crush my spirit.

[Coidzor]

...The unpleasant realities of having a gay suitemate who is able to turn off his conscience seemingly at will. I'm beginning to suspect he's sociopath of some kind. But that's not really important right now. The important thing is that some of our mutual girl friends started egging him on last night. It wasn't so bad once he had the dress on, since before he was parading around in a thong, fishnets, a bra stuffed with more thongs, and a bathrobe... And only flashed my roommate up close.

But ugh. A pale, blonde guy, with a pale dress with slight accents of red just looks horribly, horribly pale. And I usually like pale. haha.

Anyway, after he came back the second time in the dress and wearing heels, he decided to lift up the dress again while we were playing Time Splitters 3 and started demanding if it didn't look like...a lady's crotch with whatever he had done. Then he went to get the chopping knife and decided to single me out.

After that all got sorted out by my telling him he was looking and acting like a ******, which apparently made his day, he went back over to his room and cranked the volume up some gay sex scenes from some television show which he claimed had some symbolism but were really just there for the tawdry sex and eyecandy.

So basically, not only am I annoyed at him, I'm getting over the crush I had on one of his friends very quickly since she's been a complete ***** in egging him on and kissing him for the shock value since the entire campus knew he was gay within 2 weeks last year and he hadn't even bothered coming out to his parents.

in summation, an odd night, and I need to remember to lock my door after every time I pee.

[Rutskarn]

Hoooo-ooly crap.

That's, uh. That's quite an evening.

...


A knife? Seriously?

Okay, this, uh. This is getting into the creepy zone REAL FAST.

I'm going to...place.

[UncleWolf]

Yeah, I would lock the door at all times.

[Phase]

Coid, this may be my absolute lack of any sort of moral compass speaking, but I suggest scorpions.

NEW! From ScorpCo! Emperor Scorpions with poison potent enough to put your family and friends into a mild state of comatose within the hour! Now only 19.95 per box! Put them in his sock drawer, his toothpaste container! Drop a couple in his food and wait for the ambulance! Buy now and get 30 scorpions for the price of twenty!

In buying this product you absolve ScorpCo of any legal or moral obligation. Use of Emperor Scorpions on another human being with intent to harm is punishable by 25 years in prison. Please do not use Emperor Scorpions with alcohol as you are likely to drunkenly toss them about. Side effects of Emperor Scorpions have included ragged breathing, lung collapse, comatose, and, in a majority of cases, excrutiating death. Women who are nursing, pregnant, or may become pregnant tend to garner sympathy with the jury and should be avoided at all costs. Please do not ask your doctor before using Emperor Scorpions as he would likely disapprove and report you. After using Emperor Scorpions, erections lasting longer than four hours are likely due to rigor mortis and you should flee the premises immediately. We hear Mexico is a nice place to hide, just saying.

[Kneenibble]

Coidzor, please accept my apology on behalf of my people. The flames, sometimes they burn too bright and ascend into our brains, and dry up the protective vapours that usually surround them.

[Fredthefighter]

Coid, this may be my absolute lack of any sort of moral compass speaking, but I suggest scorpions.

NEW! From ScorpCo! Emperor Scorpions with poison potent enough to put your family and friends into a mild state of comatose within the hour! Now only 19.95 per box! Put them in his sock drawer, his toothpaste container! Drop a couple in his food and wait for the ambulance! Buy now and get 30 scorpions for the price of twenty!

In buying this product you absolve ScorpCo of any legal or moral obligation. Use of Emperor Scorpions on anoter human being with intent to harm is punishable by 25 years in prison. Side effects of Emperor Scorpions have including ragged breathing, lung collapse, comatose, and, in a majority of cases, excrutiating death. Please do not ask your doctor before using Emperor Scorpions as he would likely disapprove and report you. After using Emperor Scorpions, erections lasting longer than four hours are likely due to rigor mortis and you should flee the premises immediatly. We hear Mexico is a nice place to hide, just saying.

I suggest these and a rabid mongoose in his underwear draw. That would be fun. Hehe, rabid mongoose attack.
On another note: JUST EAT IT! or I'LL SUE YA!

[Player_Zero]

There is no problem that cannot be solved by the following:

Adopt a scientific method and deduce by experimentation the possible outcomes and goals of the situation and thus manipulate them to render your efforsts personally fruitful.

By which I mean, hit him with a large wooden instrument until he stops doing bad things.

Also, some villainous cad decided to egg my window at about 4AM last night.

This sort of thing make me wonder whether humanity is really worthwhile afterall and if it wouldn't be better just to put a quiet end to it before things get really out of hand.

[Phase]

This sort of thing makes me wonder whether humanity is really worthwhile afterall and if it wouldn't be better just to put a quiet end to it before things get really out of hand.

Wait, you wonder about this? I thought this was fact, held as truth, and considered the biggest goal. That's why I'm helping to construct the worlds largest sledgehammer. It will break you all.

[Fredthefighter]

There is no problem that cannot be solved by the following:

Adopt a scientific method and deduce by experimentation the possible outcomes and goals of the situation and thus manipulate them to render your efforsts personally fruitful.

By which I mean, hit him with a large wooden instrument until he stops doing bad things.

Also, some villainous cad decided to egg my window at about 4AM last night.

This sort of thing make me wonder whether humanity is really worthwhile afterall and if it wouldn't be better just to put a quiet end to it before things get really out of hand.

If humanity wants to kill itself, then let it, the rest of humanity will die and the people of the playground will rise up to claim this world.

[Kaelaroth]

Coidzor, please accept my apology on behalf of my people. The flames, sometimes they burn too bright and ascend into our brains, and dry up the protective vapours that usually surround them.

Dude, don't even associate us with that nutjob.

[Rutskarn]

This sort of thing make me wonder whether humanity is really worthwhile afterall and if it wouldn't be better just to put a quiet end to it before things get really out of hand.

Too late, PZ. Too late.